Fire
by Stonehenge
Summary: From the depths of fear and despair a hero awakens to become the greatest ace in the Belkan Conflict and finds the person that will heal his broken past. Blaze and Nagase. Ch.25: The Journey Home.
1. Blaze

I love it when games create the storyline o that you fill the role of the main character, but it bothers me. This is my vision of the main character Blaze, in Ace Combat 05. I will try to be as descriptive as I can and please tell me your thoughts as you read through. I am prone to make errors so please tell me of any.

Sit back and enjoy.

Fire

1995. That year meant a lot of things, many different things for every person. For most, I suppose it meant the end of Belka.

Belka, so I know, was the aggressor state. Over the years it held control over the northern valleys of the Osean Continent, and they made several attempts to build an empire. Each time, once they were sure of their strength, they fought an all-out war against the rest of world. I guess the world is different than it used to be, way back when. But it seemed that a ghost haunted them constantly. Each attempt failed. And with war after war the lands of Belka slowly diminished from the vast territory they once held.

1995. That year is when the final conflict with the Belkan's began. They isolated themselves, shunning all those around them. They built their industrial strength to heights unmatched by Osea or any other country in the world. They spent all they had in one last offensive, one last chance to see the black and green banner fly in glory over the world. It failed utterly. I remember seeing old photos from that time, of tanks and trucks rolling through cities, soldiers with their M-16s pointing off at some target. I doubt though they really captured the truth of what the war was. Black and white just doesn't match up to the color of war.

That year, something happened that no one thought would, or could ever happen. Faced with the inevitable allied advance, the Belkans committed the unthinkable. Looking back on the record, I think the world should have suspected it. Perhaps they were in denial with what desperate men could do? Fear has that effect on people and compounded with pride, can spell tragedy. And the prideful Belkans, in an effort to stop the advance, used nuclear weapons on their own soil. Seven bombs went off at the northern gate, blanketing the area in a giant cloud. The cities near the gate were vaporized instantly. Millions died, only for the Belkans to be entombed in the cold North. Nothing lives there anymore.

For a long time, I sat ignorant of this fact, this piece of history. Only in school when the controversy went down did I ever read anything about it. I guess it was too shocking for most to bear. I couldn't imagine it for a long time, till I saw ground zero myself along with the flat basins of the once thriving cities. It's crazy what some people will do because of pride. Though I also guess it served as God's way to hit the world on the side of the head, wake it up to the true horror of war.

1995. Most say it's when the war ended. In the wake of that tragedy, people threw down their arms and weapons, and pledged peace hitherto. It went well I suppose. We became allies with our long time rival Yuktobania. That was unthinkable before the War. However even with peace, rivalry will always go on.

To me though, 1995 is not when war ended, but when I began.

I was alive at the beginning and the end of the war, but I can't remember anything beyond one day sometime after it all happened. I am not sure how I lost all my childhood memories, or the reason why my actual parents were never found. I might have hit my head very hard. It's possible, since the earliest thing I can remember is not a memory, not really. It's the sensation of falling. Just nothing holding me up. Then I think I hit water, like I fell off a cliff or something like that. I remember trying to stay afloat and being battered against a rock. Then I hit a black area. It's almost like I died. For all anyone knows, maybe I did.

After that, it all gets mashed together. I think I was walking through some woods and then along a road, which I don't know how I happened upon. It might have even been the other way around. Eventually I was picked up by a car. Now I think he was a police officer, at the time I was too tired and young to care. That's where my earliest memory ends. It's hard not being able to think back to earlier years. I don't like it. A never-ending headache, it's like. After that, the lapse could be weeks or even months. Like a year of your life is just robbed from you.

Some time later I can remember a white room, a hospital room. They were examining me so I could be labeled in "good health" or "he is allergic to corn." They were checking for something along those lines. But that isn't what shocked them. I couldn't tell them why, but I had numerous scars along my back and the sides of my torso. My legs looked like they had been shot by something and my arms had been broken and mended in several places. This went along with, what they called, "apparent head trauma." Even I thought they were stupid at that young age. They said that all those injuries could have been caused by several falls, and these falls could also have "contributed" to the loss of my memory. While they were doing all those checks, they talked on and on about how I would soon get a "good foster family." That never happened.

I only can for sure repeat one thing an aid said to me after shining a bright light into my eyes. It was, "Your eyes are very beautiful. It's like they are on fire." I don't think I will forget that. It was the only compliment I ever got; at least I think it was. She then asked me my name. I said didn't know, to which she persisted, and eventually left the room very troubled. I never saw her again.

I think one of the doctors had a heart attack when he found something strange in my muscles and skin tissue. I didn't understand at the time why it was so disturbing. And I wouldn't for a long time. Going along my arm he was muttering something about "holes" or…I don't know, on my skin. He went along for ten minutes I guess trying to think of what could cause them. He hit the floor when he found it. I thought it was little funny at the time, which I guess disturbed him a lot. There was a little brown mount in my skin, which he thought was a mole or something. He pulled on it, sliding its long point out and then dropped. It turned out to be a pin; a long needle-like pin that had been in my muscle so long it had nearly rusted brown. They found many more needles in my arm and shoulders. As you can imagine there was big commotion then. Nurses came to help and covered their mouths. I think then I started to cry yet I don't remember being afraid or hurt by the doctor pulling the needles out. Soon male aids came and hauled the doctor off somewhere. Like the nurse, I never saw him and most of the aids again. I can't help but think that he thought I was a demon or a little monster when he pulled the needles out. Like he was facing his worst nightmare. To my young eyes he looked like he had died. That made me feel bad for awhile.

I know it was awhile before I saw much of anyone. The usual group of people coming down the hall seemed to stop as well. Like I was evil or something. I do know I cried then. I hated not having people around me. But after awhile I got used to it. The next doctor was a lot younger and I guess better nerved then the other one. He helped me get the rest of the needles and pins out of my muscles. It turned out we found five more to make nearly ten. Two of them were almost as rusted as the first. The rest looked new. They still had a lot of shine once all the blood had dripped off. I wish I could remember his name. I thought of him as a friend by the time I said goodbye to him. He really was the only one who could really stand to face me in the entire hospital. Somehow, whether in childish ignorance or false logic, I began to think that I was some kind of monster. He assured me that a lot of people got sick and the aids were very busy, but I could hear the falseness of his speech.

I was in there a few days and it was some of the loneliest days I would ever have. I had no one to talk to and I thought very low of myself. Damn it all! What was his name? He came to me one time and showed me some paper, which was the form or file he was going to give to the orphanage. Then showed me that I was nameless. He said that I needed to pick a name for myself, so he could give me a place to sleep at night. I think they were going to kick me out of the hospital. I had no money to pay them. I asked how I was going to name myself to which he was without an answer. Stuttering I think he said, "Pick a name…that…that describes you."

At that point the only thing I knew about myself was what the aid had told me about my eyes. With fire as the only analogy I had, I named myself, "Blaze."

He scribbled it down it pretty fast and said that was all he needed. It was a few days before I saw anyone but the people who came to give me meals. After that they threw me into another police car with bars separating the officer and me, giving me the impression I really was a demon. I never heard a word from him. He showed me in and out of the car, that's all. I remember I was too short see over the car door through the window. So I stared at the sky instead and saw birds flying through it every once in a while. That might be the only good memory I had for long time.

I think I would describe my introduction to that orphanage as an introduction to hell. I can't remember the name of it now, and I don't really want to. When the cop dropped me off, I was greeted by the oldest woman I had ever seen. She wore a black sort of suit and some sort of headdress. I wouldn't find out till much later that the headdress meant she was a nun and just crazy. When I asked about it, she gave a long and almost academic answer about modesty. It just confused me more.

It turned out that state was in a dire budget crisis at the end of the war with Belka. Since a budget crisis combined with a massive deficit from the war had the effect of closing down many public orphanages, it looked like I was going to be left on the curb because none of the public orphanages that were still open had enough funds from the state to feed and house me. They were filled beyond capacity. The result of all this was that I was sent to a private, church-run orphanage, instead of being left on the curb. I think I would have preferred the curb more though…

I remember the building looked like it had been built four hundred years ago. And when I asked, I had underestimated how old it was, in my young head at least. The place was incredibly cold. The heater, which was meant for us, never worked properly. Thus we little children were left to be freezing under the tiny blanket we got. At my age, something they just guessed at, I was supposed to start the first grade. Thus, I got moved to different part of the building that was even colder. I can't remember all of the details. I know I didn't sleep much. Since there wasn't much else for me to do with the time before I started the schooling, they had me go to mass in an effort to get my spirits up. I think it had more of an opposite effect.

It was truly a hell; at least I thought it was. Each day they woke me up early and I had dress in this cheeky uniform which had the tackiest pants to ever been tailored. I resented that a lot. Everything I did there was regulated. The food, I ate, the time I had to study, and even the free time we had. Every class began and ended with prayer. Even as I got older, I didn't, and still don't, like the idea of an all-powerful being that supposedly loved us all, would rob me of my memory and make me miserable through the rest of my childhood. And I said so. Because of that, all of the staff resented me thoroughly. It might have been all the scars I had or my rebellious nature to the staff priests and nuns that made them and the other kids not want anything to do with me. It became a regular thing for me to sit alone and watch the birds and the occasional jets fly overhead. Throughout my time there and even before I suppose, I had always wanted to be free of all the bonds and rules people had over me. I was a rebel then, when I look back upon it. Even though I never once thought of trying to defy them by whatever means. So I accepted the misery and spent all my time alone.

I think they might have turned me over to the public institutions once they had the resources except for two reasons. The first was that I performed better in school than most other kids. In fact I think all other kids. They wanted to brag of how great they made a child that had been so traumatized in his youth that he even forgot his own name. Even in the holy church there was rivalry. It's hard to imagine my life if I had remembered my name. People made a lot jokes about my only name. At first I was hurt by the taunting, then over time I got angry myself. And finally I just shook all of it off. The second reason I wasn't bunked out of that place was that one of the priests whose name I do remember, Father Thomas Arré, made it his personal quest in life to show me the glory of God. I'll admit he did make good points, which I rebutted, but I guess they made an impact. The only reason I chose to talk with him when he was free was that he was the only one who wouldn't hit me if I did something that was "out of order," as they always said to me. I guess he charmed the heads of the schools to keep me here, much to my dismay. With Thomas' preaching and all the absence of any affection from the other kids or most of the staff, I quickly became the character I am today.

At some point, when we kids got older, they allowed us to venture into town, which I took great pleasure in doing. We weren't allowed to go more than five miles from the orphanage and we had to stay out of a list of places they gave us. The list itself was so extensive I could barely go anywhere. Still, I enjoyed walking down the streets and thinking to myself of all the things I wouldn't miss when I was old enough to leave. There were two places I went to regularly. The first place I spent all my early visits at was just a photo shop. There were cameras in the windows with pictures of girls and other things the nuns would have reprimanded me for. Still, inside there was a wall filled with pictures from all over the world. Apparently the guy who owned it, his name was Lars, made copies of the best pictures he got in to develop and put them on the wall. By that time I was very interested in flying and lucky enough for me, Lars had a lot of pictures of fighter jets. One day he asked me when my birthday was. I told him I didn't know and right out he said, "Happy Birthday," and gave me a large poster of an F-14 Tomcat. I still have it too.

The other place I discovered by accident, and it was on the list of places not to go. It was just a local bar and restaurant, but it was also a place where rock groups and a lot of bands from the metal underground came to play every day, with occasional jazz and latin groups, though they were much rarer. For the life of me I forgot the name of the band from my first day, but I came in at the opening song for that one band. The only music I had heard before that point was from the choirs singing songs of worship and praise which I had a hard time enjoying. The fast moving, hard hitting, ass-kicking guitar that the band played blew me away. Like it came out and surrounded me. I instantly fell in love with the genre. Every time I got out I would go there after my stops at Lars' photo shop. Most would agree the music suits me well.

Every year we could request a few gifts for the holidays. Most of the kids wanted things like trading cards and toys. For me the only thing I put down was an electric guitar with an amplifier. I didn't get it that year much to my disappointment. The next Christmas, the staff didn't get it for me either. All I received was a book describing a story of some child who found God. I am not sure what I did with that. But a few weeks later, Father Thomas Arré, and his brother in the photo shop, Lars Arré pulled some money between the two and got me a solid black electric guitar. To most, it was a huge monster but to me it a thing of beauty, besides the fact that it was much bigger than I was.

It's hard to describe the little terror I became at that school when I was learning to play the thing. Even with the amplifier at its lowest I still had to use the grounds keeper's shed, which was very cold that time of year, to practice. Learning the guitar was one of the most challenging things I had to do, especially since none of the priests or faculty could help. Lars, my only friend, showed me tips when I stopped by, but most of the technique I learned from the bands that came in and out of that bar. At that time thrash metal and speed metal seemed to be the dominance in the underground, so all the music I learned how to play was much resented by everyone at that orphanage. It was metal, metal, metal! At first anyways. It wasn't until I was older and wiser that I began to appreciate anything else. Heavy metal just seemed to capture my personality at that point. All the aggressive tones and scales gave me a sweet release that I couldn't experience listening to jazz, to classical or any other style of music.

Next they said I was thirteen and for the holidays Thomas took care of my needs and gave me a five-dollar book that had nothing in it but pages and pages of empty music bars for writing notes and spaces bellow for lyrics. He told me it was so I could express all the anger and frustration that I had and get it out so God could come in. I told him it was the only time he had done something kind for me.

All the misery that I had in that place diminished from then on. I really owe everything to the music. It helped make all the sermons and classes there much more tolerable and took up so much of my time, I didn't really socialize with the other orphans. I was ever more a recalcitrant and always by myself.

One year, a student that I sat by, who was very quiet like me, said she had an old radio that I could have. I have to admit I was a shocked little teenager. I asked why and she said she thought I could use it. I didn't know what to say. She had a few friends, not many but it was more than I had. I used the radio to pick the few stations that played the big metal and rock bands out there. The songs I had been working on took a turn for the best after that. It flowed out of me like a torrent. I thanked her each time I could and she almost blushed each time I did. A few times her friends came out to hear me practice my music. They were nice. Each time they asked questions on "how could I move my fingers so fast" and "how do I still have hearing." Slowly they came to appreciate it but eventually they stopped coming, giving me the chance to concentrate. In that early part of my young adult life, it seemed that the only thing I cared about was getting better at music and playing the guitar. I didn't know at the time what it would lead to, or if it would lead to anything at all. But everything else seemed sour then. Looking back, I have to say I brought most of the sorrow onto myself.

I don't remember the rest of the time I spent there that well. I only have a feel for how long it was by each of the songs I finished or songs I learned to play. While I wasn't in the shed writing or just jamming, I sat out in the hall and jotted down notes and ideas for different compositions, or I just relaxed, playing over stuff I had heard and sometimes just daydreamed. While sitting I saw a lot people come by and pick kids up, in other words adopting them. When I was young, I wished someone would come and take me away. At one point I resented Father Thomas for keeping me there. It was the old urge I had to be free that kept longing to get out. I hoped for someone to come and just take me away. It wasn't till after I saw "her", the one real friend I had in that place, get taken into a family that I knew I would not leave that way. I started to wonder about my parents then. The mystery people whom I share genes with. I wondered if they were like the collected people that came for "her." I'd lay in bed sometimes and think of their faces, but I couldn't recall them. All of it was gone; every memory I had of them disappeared. And my thoughts turned into a nightmare when I remembered the pins and needles that were shoved in me. I made the choice then never to find them.

It wasn't till we were 16 that they allowed us to leave the institution if we wanted to. I did in a heartbeat. I didn't have any regrets then. I didn't go far, though. I made a deal with Lars to work in his store if I would still go to classes at the orphanage. With little else to do, I accepted. I got an apartment a block from the store and went to work with him early in the morning and then after all my classes finished. I do owe Father Thomas a lot too. He pulled some strings that allowed me to stay in those classes, even though I left the orphanage. At night after I was done with Lars, I would carry my guitar over to the bar. It was a little illegal since I wasn't old enough to drink, but I started with just playing some of my songs solo, before the other bands. Eventually, I was asked to play with some of them. I grew to be pretty popular around the local musicians, though there were not that many of them.

It slowly grew and I played at a lot of the clubs in the nearby towns as well. Still that's all that happened with my music. The classes at the orphanage suddenly got a lot tougher than they were when I was a little kid. They took up most of my time. Since I wasn't really staying there, I couldn't stretch it by taking time off classes. This persisted until I was 18 and graduated with a full diploma. Then I started to really concentrate. I packed my guitar on my motorcycle and rode around played at clubs and bars. I joined a few bands but they never lasted that long. I always ended up with the most unstable people as band mates. A year later I came back to Lars's shop. The life on the road was rough and I always got the bad hand. He had the idea that I apply for the academy, the Air Defense Force Academy. I remember I laughed when he suggested it. I never thought I would get in. Why would they accept an orphan who doesn't really know how old he is and whose name was Blaze? But by some miracle, Thomas said, I was accepted. I didn't believe it at first, but there it was stamped and everything delivered with the Commandant's signature. While I had no regrets of touring before, I didn't want to leave Lars for that long of a time, so every year he sent a post card telling me how he was doing. I haven't seen him since then though.

I didn't have much to take with me to the academy. All the books I used for studies were kept by the orphanage, so most of my things fit onto my bike. It was awkward riding with my guitar strapped to my back and my whole wardrobe packed in the rear basket, but that was the only problem. I didn't have nearly enough money to afford a plane ticket, and it was not too far from where I was. Still getting there was an experience of its own. A long time winding down the narrow roads in the mountains and dodging speed demons coming around the curves. It was a harsh ride, but I got through it with my guitar in perfect condition. The cold was a bit of problem. While the distance I traveled was not incredibly long it took me several days to get out of the mountains. Somewhere in there, all my spare change ran out and I had to play for some weird characters in bars to get fuel for my bike. Once I was out it was a long straight line to the academy. It got boring pretty fast. There wasn't much to do when riding 16 hours at a time. At one point I was in a kind of daze from the cold and my bike ran out of gas. That time I nearly scrapped my face along the road. It was another day delayed before someone cared enough to take me to a pump station. Didn't catch his name but I owe him a lot for getting me out of that situation.

It must have been at least eight days riding before I arrived at the academy. I forget the actual number. I wasn't late which was very good considering the trouble I had getting there. To be honest I was sure the academy was going to be just like the orphanage or worse. The military was always a big machine to me, with little guys marching like robots and firing weapons. I knew there was a uniform but this one was a lot better than the cheeky outfit I had back then. Used the money I saved up working with Lars to purchase it. It was so overly priced too. It must have been at least 3,000 dollars, and if I didn't pay they wouldn't let me in. That made me angry at first, but I had to admit I couldn't afford anywhere else. The Academy was only place one was paid to go to school. They gave me a room and a place to park my bike; I had to bargain for that parking spot since vehicles were forbidden to new students. That was the best part of my first week. There was a big ceremony where they introduced us to the academy and gave us a tour of the campus, which is very large.

Once classes began I learned what a freshman was. The upper classmen lorded over us with their higher rank. They forced us to do a lot of stupid things in my mind. It wasn't that bad I thought, though I saw several people quit there and then. I didn't want to go back to playing around the metal underground so I put up with all the damn jokes and pranks they had us do, until they found something better. The classes weren't easy either. While I scored much higher than most, it was some of the hardest work I had ever done. But the idea of flying kept me in check.

While it hit like a brick at first, I quickly got comfortable in my own routine. I was still regarded as antisocial, since I spent all my free time playing music. The guitar didn't give me much friends but it scored me some respect from the upper classmen. On the weekends I played regularly at a nearby club and that earned some fame as the musician around campus. Unlike everywhere else, they seemed to accept my unique name, Blaze. I wonder what they actually thought of it? They were not as closed-minded as the nine year-olds I grew up with. With that, my first year went by smoothly and I even was at the top of my class by the end of the second semester.

The summer after that held something interesting for me. Most went home to see their families for a few weeks. There wasn't much for me to go back to. So I didn't. I didn't know what I was going to do for those weeks off. Where was I going to go?

After the graduation ceremony for the senior class, the Commandant called me into his office. It seems I impressed him too. Seeing that I was an orphan and had no real home, I was allowed to stay at my room during the summer. He also gave me a job helping mechanics maintain the fighter jets at the base nearby. I don't know how he found out about my desire to be fighter pilot, but I didn't complain. With all the time spent at the airfield and playing at all the local restaurants and clubs occasionally, my summer vacation came to a close quickly. It was the best summer I ever had up till then though.

I sometimes confuse things that happened second year with all the crap that went on first year. It wasn't much different for me, though for everyone else in my class it seemed to be. I didn't bother wasting any time with the lower classmen. That year I wrote two songs that seemed popular with all the classmen. They weren't that impressive to me but others liked them a hell of a lot. Time and time again I was to go to parties and play those songs. In between them I would sneak in some of my favorites and some covers by my favorite artists. They appreciated them, but it still didn't stop them from asking again and again. It was almost insulting by the end, until they found something new. It secured me a stop in any party list but also painted a permanent canvass of me as a silent musician. Several times I was asked if I was a Satanist to which I mildly pissed off. I never hit anyone but I did let them know of my dislike.

The second year ended the same way and I was left with the same summer as the first year. I had become good friends with the air mechanics by that time and spent more and more of my time with them and not with my guitar. I still always found time for music though. By then I had filled up over five of those small books with my own songs. I had thought about giving them to a record company, but they were my own and I didn't want to go through the dismal life on the road.

The third year, and I think it is the same at most colleges, we were asked to choose our major or majors. I had no idea at the time, but I figured having three, which was the highest they would allow for me to take, would be better than taking just one. I chose guitar theory, aerodynamics and chemistry. I really didn't know what I was in for. More work and more classes were lodged in my schedule than I thought the academy would allow. The classes and the work they assigned me ruled my life utterly. I had little time even to play guitar despite the fact I had classes that were about guitar playing. Instead of music, often they had me give them essays on the most unrelated subjects to guitar playing imaginable. Amazingly enough, chemistry, my worst class the first two years, became my best subject. I found the ordering of molecules, and the hybridization of orbitals much more interesting than guitar theory which still is one of my few passions in life. A lot of the aerodynamics ended up being covered in the chemistry, will helped save some time, but not a lot.

That holiday season Lars sent a package full of all the pictures that he had put on the board in his shop. I sent a card back and mounted all of them on my wall as a collage. My roommate, who I barely ever saw, thought that was the best decoration for an academy wall. He took several pictures of us standing in front of it and took them home with him.

When the year resumed I felt more driven than I ever had before. I finished my first major, to everyone's surprise, at the end of the year. Though it wasn't hard to get the credit for guitar theory, I was gladder than ever to start working on new material during the summer.

I ended up spending the summer working on jets at the airfield. I was called up by some band to play with them as a featured guitarist, while they opened on one of biggest rock tours I knew about. At first I wasn't going to accept and told them I would give it some hard thought. They gave me an address and a date to show up on if I accepted. I was going to turn them down at first; the tour would take a long time. I would only play for some of it, although I would still have to go overseas at least once. It was daunting but I probably would never have many offers like that. I rendezvoused with them at the date and we set off right away.

We went to so many cities so fast I barely remember all the songs we played. We did several covers and some of their and my own material, and we got a pretty spearheaded reaction. It was a good feeling playing for real fans like that; I have to admit. I might call them up someday and do it again. They said I could any time. I stayed on the tour a lot longer than I planned, which no one had a problem with but it was not easy getting back into academy life after parting with them. I arrived back on the day before classes were scheduled to begin and got the worst night of sleep ever. It wasn't a bad way to begin my last year there.

I am not sure what happened, but I became a sort off mini-celebrity at the academy, it was a kind of semi-popularity. I was called into the Commandant's office several times to talk to majors and colonels about myself. I think the Commandant had a hand in my acceptance and wanted to make me into a poster boy since I was doing so well at the Academy. It was flattering but I would have preferred the Commandant to not use me to brag about the air forces' performance in relation to the navy.

I remember one of the majors very clearly.

I walked in, presuming that the Commandant was going to question my playing on campus again. Instead I saw what looked like a marine major. I saw the wings indicating he was fighter pilot.

The Commandant began it some what like this, "Ah, Major this is the cadet I told you about. Cadet Blaze, meet Major Jean Schinect."

I saluted then shook his hand not knowing what I was going to say back to a major. "Blaze, interesting name Cadet. Did your father fly planes? The Commandant tells me you're one of the leading Cadets to become a pilot."

"I don't know if my father flew, sir. I never knew my parents, sir." I couldn't believe how much I stuttered when I spoke to him and any superior officer. I could ride a motorcycle like no other and not break a sweat and yet I am nearly scared shitless whenever I have to address a superior officer.

"Oh you were orphaned. I am sorry Cadet. How rude of me. But that makes your getting accepted and outperforming the norm even more impressive. I am sure your foster family is very proud of how they raised you."

"I…I was never adopted, sir. I lived my life on my own."

The major's face turned painfully at that comment. "Don't I feel like a horse's ass. It is amazing that you managed to get here without your parents support. If I may shake your hand again…I think you got a real future in the military. I hope to see you in the skies, Cadet."

"Thank you, sir."

"Just out of curiosity, how did you end up with the name Blaze?"

"I named myself, sir. They said pick the name you like."

"Well, it certainly suits you, Cadet. Look me up when you get out of flight school."

The conversations didn't get my other majors done any faster, but it gave some self-assurance back, which had been dwindling while the year rolled on. I became busier; it was almost like I disappeared from the school. Only my roommate really knew I still lived in that room. The new classes I was taking for chemistry were almost unrelated to the other ones I took. It seemed all of us in the class were running for our lives from a monster. We were given so many research projects I thought I was going to explode. Tests after tests were given out. It became almost a joke to everyone not in the class. While I was back in that living hell, some of best parties happened. Everyone was partying while I struggled to stay afloat. Even though I wasn't the most sociable, it would have been a nice and well-deserved reprieve from the endless combinations of chemistry. I was so inundated with the work that before we all knew it, I had finished the major and I was well on my way to finish the third by the end of the year, or close to it.

I think I understated how wild and stupid my fellow cadets were. Some of the most hilarious pranks happened, nearing the close of that year. Sure it happened every year, but for whatever reason my class seemed to enjoy it more. Several of the statues were painted in some of the most unusual colors. Many strange events happened which involved a lot whipped cream. While I didn't have the chance to partake in any of them, it was a nice epilogue to the long years there.

And then the fourth year was over and I had finished everything right on the dot. I remember telling my roommate jokingly that I had a flare for the dramatic.

I remember seeing all the parents of my fellow cadets right before I got a bruise from one of the hats that had been thrown at the end of graduation. It was the only then I wished I had known my family. It seemed I was the only one in full dress uniform without a girlfriend and a parent taking pictures with me. I might as well have been wearing a Yuktobanian military combat gear. I stood out far more than everyone else and would spend the night drinking alone. I could hear everyone talking to their families as I past. I was amazed how people knew I was orphan and had no family whatsoever. I called Lars the night before and he said he would have liked to be there if he wasn't afraid to close his shop for even a day. Walking through the crowd though, I recognized someone I knew. Father Thomas Arré had come up to visit me. He stood out even more than I did, dressed in full black with his collar. We probably were quite a sight. I had the reputation for being a metal head and a recalcitrant bookworm and I was walking with a priest.

"You have done great things Blaze. You've done better than anyone else thought you would. I am glad all my words didn't get lost on you."

"It still hasn't been that easy, or that enjoyable."

"Oh, I know. I thought this place would be a challenge for you. I am guessing it ran you harder than the old school ever did. It must have been as though it was impossible. But look at you. You completed three majors in four years. When I went here I would have said that to be impossible."

"You went here?" I said.

He nodded in reply. "Yes, as did Lars. We both took the academy course. Graduated as ensigns and were lieutenants when we were out of flight school. We were ecstatic. I remember passing whiskey around as we listened to the graduation ceremony. We both fought in the war fifteen years ago against Belka. When the last day of the war came and the skies were like fire, we both decided that the world didn't need war and soldiers. Thus we both found ourselves in separate places."

I never thought of him the same after then. He and Lars seemed almost like my family.

"Now Blaze. I see you having a great future as a pilot. You have a determination and a respect that no one will expect. I always knew that."

"Why did you take so much care for me?" I asked.

"When I saw they were having trouble with you and I read what you had been through. I was sure you fall out of the system as soon as you could and become a criminal or die from loneliness. Newly ordained, I couldn't let someone who had such a bad past that God wiped the memory of it from him, fall into misery and lose all faith. I knew without past experiences you would not understand the other children and get alienated. It would have been a lot worse if the decision to deport you had gone through. I saw it only fit that I help you." He didn't speak for moment. I suppose he knew how much of a revelation it was for me. "Though I never wanted you to become familiar with Lars, but it seems to have turned out for the better. You are like a brother to us, Blaze."

"I still don't see why you hold so much to him when you've seen what lessons _he_ deals."

He knew what I was alluding to, but spoke very calm in reaction. "I thought you would still hold some resentment. But you…I know you'll see it some day, when a person comes into your life that you can't deny." He stopped and put his hat on then we embraced as he prepared to leave. "And now my younger brother, I must get back to my flock."

I went back to my room that day with a piece of a puzzle I never knew existed.

(A/N): I know it's no too exciting but this chapter is vital to understand the character of Blaze. I promise the air battles will be fantastic.

Thank you for reading.

-Stonehenge


	2. Nagase

Fire

1995. There is a lot associated with that year, at least there was. To tell the truth, it seems hardly real to me now. It's mixed with all the emotions, and fairy tales that I loved as a child. Growing up, I looked to the sky. It's hard for me to imagine them on fire like that.

1995. History came to know it as the final reckoning against the Principality of Belka. That's what the books I read said about it. Though now there is a new history to tell. It was the war to end war, so to speak, it taught a lesson that hatred and anger only bred death and strife. Still there seems to be some sternness against that fact even now.

1995. It seems so distant now. When you're young, I guess years and months seem like lifetimes. Along with my childhood, it is as real as dream, and as frightening as nightmare. Though, it is the horror of life to those who do remember. Seven bombs for seven cities for seven gates. I can't believe even with all the accounts of it. It's like one of the fairy tales I used to love.

1995. The Belkans in their desperation, used nuclear power on their own soil, creating a barren land which today, is still highly radioactive. It was in an effort to stop the allied advance, all it served was to bring destruction and entomb themselves in the cold north. Hatred was potent in them. I still don't get why they pushed on and on, war after war until they were utterly destroyed that it drove them to use such demons as nuclear warheads. They hated us so much and, loved war that they killed their own, and sealed their demise. I didn't get why peace was out of the question for them. I still don't really, even after all that has happened concerning them. Back then I never wanted to see the peaceful skies become bloodstained again. That and my love for flying drove me to go to the academy and become a fighter pilot.

My experience at the academy was, from start to finish, surreal. I can still clearly picture coming up the steps, with the marble chapel on the right. I myself didn't carry that much over. I knew they wouldn't let you take that much into your room so I only took a few trinkets along with my wardrobe. It was still a handful coming up the hundreds of step there with a load like mine. I must have looked very stupid coming in as late as I did, though I wasn't the only one.

The room I was given was small and not the most comfortable but I found it suited enough since I spent most of my time not there. Then my days at the academy flashed by like minutes. It's hard to remember what I did the first year now. I remember being buried in work for hours on end. It was tough; I still managed to have a good time.

I spent most of my time there at the academy's cadet lounge. It was really the only place there to get something to eat and to relax. I can remember that place even better than my own quarters. Rows of booths lined along the walls and separated the room in different sections. Each had a black wood table, polished clean everyday, and red leather seats that could never be found with a hole in them else you'd risk never being allowed to come there again. Around the walls were pictures of the past classes that came through there. Their faces were happy, when you looked at the pictures. It was hard to think that some of them were now teaching there while others had gone on and were killed in the war against Belka. The room was a shrine in and of itself. It held the memory of all the good times the past officers had experienced at the academy, made from the memory of the fallen. It was easy to see why they were so strict about keeping it clean, even though it was public restaurant. There was a table in the corner of the hall, it had silver framed picture of an old Tomcat F-14. Probably it was from when the fighter jet was first introduced. On the jet was standing one man, with one foot in the cockpit and the other on the loading stair. I asked around but never found out his name. He looked so proud though. On the side of the nose I could see five decals which marked the number of planes he shot down. Five decals, which made him an ace pilot. No wonder he was so proud. That table under that picture is where I spent most of my time. Reading, studying, or just eating, I was always there. It was out of the way of the entrance. So one else really came to sit there. That was why I chose it, quiet and giving me time to concentrate. I was usually alone when I sat there. Only about three times had I ever eaten lunch or sat with anyone else for that matter. It became known as my spot after the first and second years I was there. I think there is even a sign there now. Even after all this time. Still I wouldn't be that surprised if they took it down now.

That and my room were the only things at the academy that stayed the same all four years. Everything else and even I was different as time went. The second year was probably as tough as or even tougher than the first but it didn't hit me as hard. It seemed to go by much faster than I thought it would have, four years at the academy seems like only four days now. It's true when they say that time flies, and for me it's quite literal.

College I guess is something no one really forgets, since all of what you do there seems to stick with you your entire adult life. It's still like a fantasy though. It wasn't that long ago but so much has happened.

A day that I'll never forget is when I graduated. The day began early with us getting dressed for the only time we would wear the uniform, for the parade. I had seen it several times before, when the other classes had finished their fourth year. I was ecstatic to have my turn, even though people said I looked more relaxed than anyone they knew. In truth I think I was more nervous. The parade ended up being a few hours of marching in formation around the school campus, while all the parents and friends took pictures of us. I didn't get to meet my parents until after the parade since they had arrived a bit late. It was big relief to see them though. They had lived on the other side of Osea. Even with a fast flight it took a long time to get to the academy. I barely got to see them ever because of that. I really was living in school most of the time. As soon as I found them in the crowd I ran and gave them more hugs than I ever had in the previous years of my lifetime combined. When you are away from home for a long time, it seems a certain part of you sleeps. A part of you just goes away, but once something from that home is seen, it's an adrenaline rush outmatching any other experience. It unto itself is surreal. Like time slows down and every moment became precious. These are the moments that make the hard work and sweat worth it.

"Kei, how are you? You are different person now I guess, Lieutenant."

"Just glad to see you again."

I showed them around the campus since they hadn't seen it while I was a cadet there. It lasted a few hours. I ended up discovering some parts of the campus I never knew existed before. The campus itself wasn't that big, yet there were always things that seemed to hide from everyone. We went on quite awhile. Chatting about some of the demerits I had gotten, some of the people I had met. Several of my classmates ended up joining us, and it was like one huge family walking down the roads. I showed them the spot I sat by myself for long whiles; they commented that I was falling back into old habits. Somewhere in the past I guess I was very solitary. Even so it was always good to have friends.

Eventually enough time had gone past that we were required to change and prepare for the ceremony and I took the chance to show them my former quarters. Even though it was technically against the Osean Military Code of Justice to take a civilian into your quarters. I didn't get caught though, and I just wanted them to see what we had to put up with.

The graduating ceremony was long and drawn out. While one general seemed to get up and get to the point of what was going to happen to us, the others seemed to put their lives into their incredibly boring speeches. I think I nearly fell asleep sitting there for that long. I think a few dozen others did. There must have been about a thousand of us, very small compared to most colleges, but for the academy we had one of largest classes to ever graduate, since most of the people who came in our year stuck with it. Going back, I could tell a lot of the things they made us do were really just to weed out those who didn't have enough will to take it. It makes sense now. Still, it was surprising since Osea was having major military cut backs at that time. Harling was the anti-war President of Osea. Since we were allies with the Yuktobanians and since Belka was permanently neutralized, most of the funding for training officers had been rolled back. Instead they used the surplus funds for a new joint program between our countries. Personally I liked the idea. But for that reason the requirements were becoming stricter and stricter. Each year before us had less and less graduates, while ours surpassed all other years even before the war in 1995.

There is a photo of us at graduation. Below it someone wrote the words, "all of them paid." A lot said it had negative connotations, but I think it's just a joke. The picture is still there so much as I know.

The graduation finally ended with us standing at attention and the new world record for hats' being thrown into the air was set. What no one photographs are all the hats coming down though. Most came out of that with several bruises on their heads. I was lucky and only was hit in the arm. It still left a good bruise though.

The biggest party in the world happened after that. Everyone looked the same in uniform and I had the most trouble finding out who was who. We talked about so much I can't remember anything. I don't think there was a greater feeling of joy in the world. So many people smiling and laughing. I don't think there could have been a happier moment. At some point I had left my parents with a few of my friends and walked down dodging all the lieutenants carrying beer. I thought about flight school and all the further training I had to go through to become a pilot. It didn't worry me, but it was still so far away. Overhead during the ceremony some of the aces of the air force did a flyby. The roar of the jets engines and power of their acceleration made me think of what was in store for me. Closing my eyes I could the white clouds passing by, the faint hum of the engines and sweet peaceful blue sky greeting me.

I had nearly lost my self in thought. I found that I had wandered far from where my parents were. I started walking back slowly, since the crowd had become even thicker. I noticed some of the graduates turning their heads and pointing at some guy. Further through the fray of people, I had found out who it was. He was probably the only graduate who didn't have a big smile on his face. I had seen him before, but only when he was playing at some of the clubs and bars that were around and when he carried his guitar to and from his room. He was sort of a legend around the campus. He was one of only a handful of people who finished three majors in a four-year period. That and his incredible guitar skills made him somewhat the envy of the campus, though he was a bit of an outcast, by his own choice I knew. Sitting in the lounge, I usually could hear his guitar clearly while he was at the bar playing. The style he chose to play was far from what I would choose. Heavy metal was too loud for me. Even so I could enjoy his music. He truly had skill unrivaled. Many people wondered why he was in the academy. Other than that though, I never met him personally before that day. I had heard his name was Blaze, and that he was an orphan. While it was amazing, in a sense no one was really surprised when they found out.

Everyone seemed to part and stare as he passed. I felt bad that people thought of him as such an outcast. No one even dared to bump into him. He was walking with a priest which seemed to surprise everyone. The crowd I was moving through was very thick. I thought about going and saying hello to him since it might have been the last time I'd see him. I decided against it and just wanted to move past them undisturbed. I walked to the left side of the priest and tried to slip past him. I didn't see the priest put his hand on Blaze's shoulder, "And now my younger brother I must get back to my flock." I heard him say that as he turned and walked right into me.

"Oh, my sincerest apologies miss. I was just panning to go back to my car. Please forgive this." He kissed my hand and then bowed slightly. I was surprised; no one had been that friendly in greeting with me before.

"It's alright father," I said with a laugh.

"Well if I may," he took off his hat and bowed again to me, "I am Thomas Arré. A pleasure to run into you, miss…."

"Nagase, Kei Nagase."

"And a lovely name for a lovely Lieutenant. Congratulations on making it through this place. I can imagine it was very difficult this year, and in these times. I hope you had a very good run and you will have a very good celebration, you deserve it."

"I'll try hard, sir."

"I'm sure of that. What do you plan to go into with the air force? There so many things you would be more than qualified to be doing."

"I….I am planning to become pilot, sir. Flying has always amazed me."

"As it had amazed me. A pilot, that is fantastic. Means you have something in common with Blaze here. Eh Blaze?"

I looked at Blaze really for the first time in my life. His head was turned low. His eyes met mine for only second. I could see the faint red waves that were in them, like there was fire burning beneath them. Yet they looked so sad. After that second, his eyes turned down, and he said nothing. He looked a bit annoyed too, like Father Thomas was doing something that he didn't want to happen.

"Blaze himself has long had an admiration for aviation. He will be in the air with you I hope. Blaze I am sure you have met Kei in the four years you spent here."

His was low and deep when he replied, "I haven't."

"Please Blaze, you must learn to stop isolating yourself from everyone else. You burden yourself too much, my friend. Well I wish luck to you both as I take my leave. Long journey for all of us ahead. And may God bless you Kei."

"Thank you, Father."

"Blaze," Blaze turned around slowly and moved as if he was answering a call he didn't want. "Keep the faith, and it will get better."

At the time that didn't mean anything to me. It wasn't until I learned a great deal more about Blaze that I found out what he meant. He walked away very quickly, shaking graduate's hands as he went through the ever-thickening crowd. Blaze and I stood there a moment, watching him leave. Then he turned the other way and started walking briskly. I wasn't sure why at the time, but I ran after him and called out his name. He stopped and turned around slowly.

"Blaze…um, there is a party down at my sponsor's house at seven tonight. If you want, we would be happy if you joined us."

"I suppose I'll need to bring my guitar."

"Well, no." It seemed like he was being asked to go through the academy again when he responded. I didn't want him to feel that was why. "You can just come yourself. If you want to bring your guitar, of course you can. I think they have an amp and there will plenty of food and people there."

He stared at me for few more seconds then walked away a few steps, then turned back. I thought he was considering the offer. I nodded to him to try and say 'please come' again without words. He stared at me for a few more seconds and then disappeared into the thick crowd.

After about ten minutes I finally made it back to my family and friends. We spent the rest of the day walking around the campus more and meeting other classmates. I was a little preoccupied. I couldn't help but think of Blaze. He just looked so sad on his graduation day. I couldn't begin to fathom why. He had completed three majors and was one of highest scores of the class; he should have had a look of relief or at least satisfaction. I couldn't help but wonder if he would come or not to the party tonight. He didn't really know me or anyone that well. He had little reason to go but to get out and relax which is still not in his style. We didn't bother eating any dinner since we were planning to have more than enough alcohol that night to kill a few cows. We got to our sponsor's house early to help with the set up, that and few beers later I completely forgot about Blaze. I dressed out of my uniform, and as soon as most of the people arrived we started to have real party. I really don't have much memory of it. We played plenty of drinking games with the ping-pong table and a ring toss that someone had. I know I was having a good time. From what people told me when they came in the house, I was louder than they thought possible. Even I find that hard to believe. One thing, I do remember taking on all the guys there to a drinking contest. I took out a few NAVY shot glasses and the mayhem began. I really hope it wasn't me that broke the table, though I can see myself getting angry enough and kicking it into submission.

At some point I must have started getting angry with the party goers because I ended up sitting in the living room by myself and toasting to a painting of a dead army officer. I sat there for a while I guess.

I don't know how long it was until the doorbell rang. It took a moment for me to lift myself off the chair to answer it. I probably should have waited for someone more sober to do it, because it ended up that Blaze decided to come after all. He was wearing his black jacket and sure enough he had his guitar case. From what he told me a lot later and the little I remember I think it went somewhat like this.

"Blaze, it's you!?"

He looked a bit puzzled until he must have smelled the alcohol and figured it out.

"You asked me to come, right Nagase. Well I did, why not?"

"Yeah….but people have told me you don't usually go to parties unless they pay you to play there. Anyway I'll show you where you can set up if you need…" I tripped and fell into him. He was quick to drop his guitar and catch me.

"Sorry. I think I'm a bit drunk."

"Just take it a bit slower."

With that he left me in there and walked out to the back. I went after him since I expected people to be surprised that he was there, and they were.

Everyone quieted down and watched him enter. It must have been more because of what he was wearing than of them actually knowing who he was. He put the guitar case down and everyone stared at it like there was a gun inside. I got there shortly and introduced him to everyone. After that, people seemed to relax on the fact that he was there. Blaze's reputation wasn't good but it wasn't bad either. Everyone thought of him as the silent guitarist. The party stayed a little quieter until Blaze cranked up the amplifier and started playing some of his own songs. I was never one to really dance a lot. That night I danced more than I ever had. For some reason his songs just seemed to get everyone who wasn't necessarily a metal head banging all over the yard. Two songs we all kept getting him to play over and over again was one he called "Hit The Lights" and another called "Enter Sandman." Both of them had grooves that no one was tired of for a long time.

I can't be sure when the party ended or what time I passed out. I can be sure that Blaze pretty much played till the dead end of the party. I felt bad at first. The only experiences he had at parties, was playing. Now though I think he wouldn't have it another way. He wasn't the most sociable and music was his passion. I remember how everything seemed to drift away from him as he played. His eyes closed and his finger's moved perfectly with each other. I can't imagine what he thinks about when he's in that sort of trance. I think there could have been another war and Blaze wouldn't have noticed. I did want to say something to him before he left though it didn't happen since I passed out first. I can't remember what it was now, but it was important to me though.

It was at least seven in the morning when I awoke in my bed. I wondered how I got there. Someone must have carried me over there, since I didn't own a car to drive. It was probably Blaze who did…I think. Anyway I didn't see him again for a long time. I think he went on tour with another band. He had a little following going around the local clubs. He had caught the attention of a lot of bands before. I do remember seeing him onstage once when I went to a concert with my roommate. I think it was him soloing for the band though they never mentioned his name, but he had same sort of spiked hair and black jacket. It wasn't until my number was called up to Heierlark, the base which I took flight training, that I saw him again.

I was a long while till we were called to flight training though. It was about three months of me just sitting on the base, using Osean military money to do nothing at all. Blaze got there I suppose at the same time as I did. I didn't see him much even through he rode his motorcycle often around the base since there was little else for him, or me for that matter, to do. The months went by pretty fast that way and before we knew it we were already sitting the cockpit of an F-5E, training fighter. Unlike flying helicopters or other aircraft type pilots, we would have to stay at Heierlark for another two years before we finally got into our training squadrons.

Flying presented a rush of its own. The first time I gripped the flight stick, I might have had a heart attack if I was much older. Despite how safe and stable they all looked from the ground, those planes have more power than anything I had ever sat in before. The fierce bellow and hiss of the engines when they wound up, and the horse cry of the burners firing up. I don't think I can forget that first feeling of such power in my hands. It could almost go to a person's head, and it did exactly that sometimes.

I don't remember his name or what he was like before it happened. It was just another day where we went up to stock up on flight hours so we could become certified to fly. I had gotten up early and was pretty tired by that time of the day, 6:05. I finally felt as though I had enough caffeine logged in my brain to stay awake at the stick. My flight instructor nearly didn't let me go up because of fatigue, but I somehow coaxed him into letting me. The sun was just past twilight and I was just getting my mask secured and runway clearance. It was a minute before I was in the air. My instructor took off behind me, and stayed on my right wing as we circled over the base.

"You still awake in there Nagase? We have another ten minutes of good fuel to get some practice down."

"Yeah, I've been just a bit overworked this week, sir."

At that moment I could have slept right then and there. It just seemed so much of an effort to keep my eyes from closing.

I heard him sigh over the radio as he responded. "Yeah, we all have. I tell ya they should put choosing the right kinds of coffee in the flight training. I would have crashed a long time ago without the stuff." The last part of the sun was about to set. "Ok let's round about and head to the landing. I have a date with someone worth more than this plane."

We changed vector perfectly. Our wings stayed in the exact same angle as before. "Ok lady. Landing practice time. Talk to me through all the steps before you touch down. Understand?"

I was about to move forward of him to land when an F-18 Hornet just bogged on my nose. You could say I was really shocked since I jumped the fighter down about 50 feet. My instructor was screaming over the com.

"Damn it pilot! You have be a lot more careful around these rookies, got it?!"

There was no answer from the aircraft. It just continued to move at a steep angle toward the runway.

"Pilot, respond and pull that nose up."

Still I didn't hear anything on the radio.

"Damn it. Pilot if you don't pull the nose up you will be dragging yourself at 180 on the ground. Get that nose up!"

I could see the back of his canopy then. He was getting to a point where if he didn't pull it was likely he wasn't going to do much of anything. I remember the instructor screaming after me as I pulled along next to him. Nothing looked abnormal when I first looked in the cockpit. Then I saw that his mask was off and he breathed as though he was having a heart attack. Something was just scaring him beyond belief. I don't get why he was just staring at the ground as he got closer. I then thought I might try and talk him up.

"Hey," I spoke slowly. I thought maybe that would jump him less if he heard a gentle voice. "Can you hear me? Okay, you're almost there. You're almost home, now you just need to pull up the nose and put out your gear."

Nothing happened that time.

"Hey, just clear your head and just put the nose up a little harder."

I waited this time, hoping that he would get his own sense back. I saw his arm move then and the landing gear slowly came down. Then real slowly the nose came up from the dead angle he was at.

"That's great. Now just slow down and go in."

I thought I had done it then. I thought he would land a little roughly but that he would survive. That's what really matters. I pulled back in formation with my instructor.

"Great Nagase. You may have saved his life today."

He was over the runway and only a hundred feet from touch down. I wasn't worried about anything then. I was so sure I had it, so sure he was okay. What I guess pushed him over the edge is that his landing gear had lost pressure on take off and I guess that thought just hit him when he was coming back in. He hit the ground. The gear broke on contact. He panicked and pulled the throttle all the way down. The jets ignited and he lost control, sending him into an empty hangar. No one else was hurt in the crash.

I saw every horrific moment of it. The gear snapping as though it was it was made wood. The body of the Hornet sinking into the ground, the glow of the engines as it spun around and skipped up into the hangar. I guess I was and we were lucky. If there had been an air crew maintaining jets in there, other pilots would have died on the ground. I can still see the final blast of the engine before the aircraft exploded. I remember circling around the base again, in shock of what had happened. My instructor started wailing at me not to crash. The next day all flights were temporarily suspended while the debris was cleaned up. I don't think I even left my bed that day. I just stared out the window, at the empty sky. It was such a waste, a pilot giving his life for his country in peacetime. There wasn't an enemy anywhere to be found and still people die. When the service came for the pilot, I couldn't bring myself to go. I didn't even go to find his name. I regret never going. It seemed like I had failed to save my own child or something like that. I just hope his family is okay now and that they will live a long and happy life now that it is peacetime again.

The next weeks were more of the same training. Whether it was to be a simulator or a plane, we had so much flying to be done we practically lived in our flight suits. This was for most of the junior cadets there. Everyone, except the fighter pilots, only had to go on to their training squadrons while we still had more training. After a while, we had earned some down time to go out to the native city there. Heierlark was near the North Gate, were the seven bombs blew and separated North Osea from Belka. Though if you called it North Osea to a native, you would put a scowl on his face and he'd tell you it was South Belka. Even in such horrific defeat they stay true to their name. I guess there's some right to that. Although it does explain some of their deeds. In the past wars when Belka challenged the world to fight, they were rushed by Osea and Yuktobania, the country across the sea. I guess they would have some animosity towards us.

Going out I saw Blaze ride by on his motorcycle. He nearly ran me over in fact. He moved with the bike as though he was in a fighter jet. Though he was being reckless going that fast, we had to admire his skill at handling the bike. It was though he didn't really have any fear of messing up and getting hurt. He didn't wear a helmet with his bike either. Everyone thought that he was trying to impress some people, but I knew better. He was so quiet, even more than I was. I wanted what secrets he clung to so fiercely behind his sad fiery eyes.

Everything just about hung loose at our final week there. I guess you should say that was suppose to be our most stressful week, but I was more relaxed than ever. Soon we would be certified to fly. It was a dream to us all. I spent most of the hours just staring at the parked F-18s. To most of those who clung to the ground, it was an old ugly bird of war that had no future in the Osean military. It was an ugly duckling on the ground, but it couldn't be beaten in the beauty it had when flying through the air. The Hornet was what I would be flying, at first anyway. It was one of the most versatile aircraft that was available to the Osean Air Fleet. It was also one of the older aircrafts as well. Its first missions were flown long before the final battle with Belka. Though that version was modified to increase performance, it still held onto the same principles that the first factory models had boasted.

Another favorite thing I had experienced at Heierlark was the night flights. When the sky was clear the landscape was spectacular though it was bit frightening because of the snow storms. The moon appeared blue in the sky, and shined a fluorescent light that reflected from the snow, giving the area a magical appearance. Often times I would get too distracted and start to move out of formation. My wingman, who kept a more careful eye on himself, was always frantic about me staring out of the canopy.

Osean Air Force standards demanded that we have a certain number of night flying hours before they would send us off to our squadrons. I was more than happy to go up all those times in that last week. It was like saying goodbye to an old friend. It wouldn't be the last time I would see the crew room of Heierlark though as I found out. I still would like see that moon again and all the beauty it held over that landscape in spite of ground zero, the flat plain of the Northern Gate, made up of seven huge craters. It was like going from heaven to hell or someplace similar when we flew near it. It was as though the Earth itself was dead. You couldn't even see any birds fly over it. Beyond, was the fallen state of Belka, the final tomb for the war driven nation. I do miss some things about Heierlark, but I never wanted to see the fruits of labor from a country's leaders gone insane again.

I still had to wait to be assigned to a squadron when my flying was done. I spent most of the time in the crew rec room. I had found an old token from my childhood. "A Blue Dove for the Princess." I could recite every word in it at one time in my childhood. It was so vivid to me. All the poetry and art of old tales caught my interest as much as the air did. It had somehow tagged along through my journey as a pilot. When I saw again for the first time, it was as though I was approaching a prophet. I walked toward it and stopped, not knowing what I would see, even though I had read it over thousands of times. Something just started pumping me with anxiety. It was as though I was asleep all the time till I found this missing piece once again. Lost in the rushed memory, I found the book there in my hands. I held it like precious gem, a priceless heart of silver finally found again. I heard the binding wane as I opened the cover; it had been a long time since it was ever opened. It was as tight as a gate rusted over a hundred years of weathering. The cracking stopped when it was opened, and I was met with the smell of time and dust. It had started to decay over its years in keep. I turned the pages carefully not wanting to ruffle its edges any more than they were. I went through three times and then three times more. I read the old tale, and the legend of the fierce demon, Razgriz.

"Behold the Razgriz, its wings of black sheathe."

I will never forget that line.

I read through it more and found there were pages that had broken or were unbound from the spine and nowhere to be discovered. I met it with disappointment, but not surprise. It was expected from a book packed away for that long that, when I first received it, was already more ancient than I. The more I looked at the ones that still remained the more I wished to remember the missing chapters. I packed the book away once again. That night, I thought of it and nothing else, though the day itself was very hectic. Lying awake in bed I went through all I could remember of the story. Slowly it came back. I remembered something of what was missing in the text. I immediately took a paper and the book, and wrote it down where it was missing. I kept scratching, erasing, and etching over and over till I was sure of its authenticity. I spent the entire night staring into the book, lost in a reverie of my childhood. It wasn't the smartest thing for me to do, but I couldn't bring myself to sleep. When I was both physically and mentally exhausted I fell asleep and woke two hours later to my alarm. I did not want to move at that time, but I had to muster or risk being court-martialed. Although nearly dead, I made it on time and responded when called. It was as though I was high on caffeine. Probably the unhealthiest thing I had ever done to myself, besides over-drinking at times. It lasted about five hours which was good, because then my duties ended. I fell asleep in the crew room and was woken and sent to my bed around nine that night by some major. It was a good thing he was that friendly or I would have been sent out of the program for health issues.

Flight school finally came to an end which was a huge relief to us all. We all enjoyed some well deserved down time. Most of everyone left the base and went around to the local bars and clubs to rest, I guess Blaze packed up his guitar and went with them or went on tour with another band. I didn't see him on the base since I was one of the last to leave. I spent the first few days sleeping, getting over the tremendous loss of sleep I had received. The crew was very quiet save for the active pilots on duty. I spent the rest of the time remembering what was written. It was a trial and error task. Sometimes when I was sure of a lines authenticity, I would later tear up as a complete mess. It provided some unwanted stress, but for the most part it was an escape to the, still then, daunting idea of my first squadron.

The day finally came only a few weeks after I had returned home. I was assigned to what I first thought was an insult. It was the Sand Island Military Base, on the western coastline of Osea. It was very small and pretty much unknown to all of the other officers I spoke to. Only the older ones that happened to have fought in the last war had some information to give me. Specifically, that my squadron leader, and thus my new flight instructor, hadn't been promoted from Captain since the war fifteen years ago. They said he was loudmouth and had many instances of disobeying orders given very plainly to him. They also said that he was one of the best pilots and best aces from the last war. It didn't help well to calm my nerves about Sand Island. His name, they told me, was Bartlett. I went to look up what kind of kill record he boasted. I couldn't find anything predating his return to duty after being shot down. Apparently, somehow, the data was lost in the conflict. That made me slightly more irritated but not much. Seeing pictures of Sand Island and comparing it to Heierlark made me feel somewhat better. It was in a sort of tropical region. I had never been that far south to experience that kind of weather so I was stoked when I first arrived, despite that long flight across Osea and the desolate Northern Gate. I was sad to leave Heierlark and then I never wanted to see it again.

The base completely enchanted me when I arrived. It looked out over where the ocean met rich white sands complimented by palm trees stretching over small sections of green grass. It was something out of 'the best spots to go vacation' books. Seagulls, which I had seen only once before in my life, were so abundant that it got to the point where they became extremely annoying at times. The sky was almost always blue. At Heierlark, depending on how high you flew, it would always be dark in clouds and storms. The first day was like a trip to paradise while the next was something else.

Captain Bartlett, commander of Wardog squadron, and my new flight lead, might have been, and still would have to be, the most badmouthed officer in the entire Ocean Air Force. We were set to muster at six hundred hours the next day. He made sure we were up before five, waling through the quarters, shouting into a megaphone.

"All right nuggets, better get up, shower and look fit and perky for your first day on the squadron. Anyone late will have their wings clipped and be escorted off this base."

I heard the base commander scold him about forty minutes later on that.

Bartlett and the other trainers of Wardog Squadron came off at first as old jackasses with a rubber band across their balls, so one of my crewmates had said. Pops, the mechanic, I found was fighter pilot too, and took great time in constantly yelling basic fighter maneuvers at us. It was annoying until later when we found out how much we needed it.

Blaze, apparently had also been assigned to Wardog squadron, as well as a lot of the other people that were at Heierlark. It was nice seeing familiar faces around while you had to deal with someone like Captain Bartlett. Blaze seemed even more distant from everyone else than he ever was at the academy. Something was getting him I know. From the way he acted on land, I wondered how he would be able to fly. That doubt was put to rest for all time when I first flew in formation with him. He seemed to not have any fear of crashing into another aircraft or the ground for that matter. He was as calm in the air as he was on the ground, which Bartlett seemed concerned about at times. He constantly got at Blaze when not a lot many people were around about his unhealthy social habits. He often said he needed to get all the stress of flying out of him by having a ball at times. This happened every time the captain could get Blaze alone, which was often, but it always ended with Blaze just assuring the captain that he was all right and that his performance would not be sacrificed in the air. Bartlett took it for a while as that. Though when I talked to him once he said that Blaze was going down a dead end road.

"I could really use some help on this Nagase. He's going to be a brilliant fighter pilot. But all the stress will break him someday. I've seen it happen," Bartlett had said to me.

"He's always been that way. At the academy, Heierlark, and whenever I have seen him. He just puts a lot on his plate. He likes to be challenged sir," I responded.

"Well, the music may help him some, but he really needs to get his head out of his ass. It's obvious he's had a hard life. So he doesn't need to make it any harder for himself now. I won't bar him from getting his wings, but…he needs some lovin' or else things will just be hell later on. Get my drift, Second Lieutenant?"

"Yes, sir."

I wanted to help Blaze get the chip off his shoulder about everything. He always looked like he was overloaded with work and depressed about something. Though he would never really admit that when asked. Bartlett hoped that the psychological review for pilots would catch that he had depression or something, but he always passed everything with flying colors. To be honest I wasn't too worried about him. He was quiet but I didn't think he was unstable or anything. It wasn't till a lot later that I found out anything about him. He became a lot more conflicted, as though past memories were coming back to mind.

Once when we were let loose of the flight training to go out into the city, I went with many others to see him play. I had heard that there was a big rock fest going down at the local stadium and all of us at the bar got pumped and drove to see it. I never found out who he was playing with, but I knew the songs were written by him. He played "Hit The Lights," along with several others. They made a big splash. But the one that really hit big with the crowd was a new song he called "Battery." It opened with a sort of pseudo classical guitar, then exploded into a speed driven rhythm faster and louder than anything he had ever done before. The lyrics seemed to be about power and energy, from what I could catch beneath his guitar. I would later learn that he didn't write them, but he approved, noting that he didn't care that much about lyrics. But what made everyone deaf was the awe inspiring solo in the center of the piece. I had never seen him have that much fun, while playing. It was like he was driven by some demon from hell. Anyway, most of us were not big fans of metal, but we even yelled and banged our heads in the simple but powerful following measures of his solo. I remember waving at him when he finished the song and was preparing to leave the stage. He even saw me too. He had a look of confusion and surprise, at first, but he actually broke into a smile as he leapt down and walked to his bike. It was the first time I had ever seen him do that. It was a great night, and none of us are going to forget it anytime soon.

-This is the end of my introduction to the storyline.

-"Hit The Lights," "Enter Sandman," and "Battery" are all kick ass songs by Metallica. If you haven't heard them, go listen now.


	3. Shorebirds

Fire

So much has happened since then. I've taken off on numerous sorties with Wardog. It seems insane considering how much risk there was, looking back. I wish sometimes it had all gone differently. That Cape Landers never saw its pilots take off to war again. That the white sand island never was tainted by the red pour of blood. They were so blinded by their self-glorifying hatred of Yuktobania and Osea. They saw nothing but red, and rage caused them to take war…no, to take animosity to those they believed deserved it. I hope someday it all dies away and I don't have to worry about war anymore. Blaze agrees, I know, though he wasn't there when all of it began. When we had the first casualties, he had been called away, and maybe if he had been there, it might have gone better…or worse.

There wasn't much special about it. Really, the only thing that happened that may have seemed ominous was some mechanics cracking a fuel line when doing maintenance on the Captain's aircraft. I was tired though. I woke late and almost missed muster, and the only meal I would have that day. The rest of the day was spent going over basic maneuvers. It wasn't the first time we were going up as a squadron, but a newspaper journalist had come from the mainland to write on the Captain. Naturally, he made us go over every maneuver, time and time again. Since the war fifteen years ago, he had been frozen at Captain, never being promoted once. It might have been the chance for him to redeem some lost credit from the base commander. The journalist, whose name is Genette, would surely have been impressed with his flying, if that day had gone differently.

Blaze, by that time, was already clearly a skilled pilot. Bartlett was furious when two days before then, a marine major had called Blaze and made a lunch appointment with him. He called the major himself and tried to talk him down. It only ended with the major almost reprimanding Bartlett, not that it would have really mattered for the Captain's career. Blaze had left late that night. I noticed him take off on a C-5 transport. Most of the squadron considered him lucky that morning since he wouldn't have to put with an even louder Bartlett. We didn't know how lucky he actually was.

I was the fifth to take off after Bartlett, with Genette in the seat behind him. He was followed by the other instructors, and then me after another plane. It was only to practice combat maneuvers. Still, we were fully armed, since we were an auxiliary squadron.

I remember staring over the nose of the F-5E. The runway of Sand Island ran a long way under blue sky and opening onto the crystal ocean. I almost got lost in looking forward to the sky.

"Nagase! You're cleared for take off."

"Get up here, damn it!"

It was a smooth take off. The F-5E had great maneuverability. It was still far from the F-18's that sat in their hangars, ready for use. Pops kept them all maintained and clean. They were ready for battle, but since it was a peace time, the base commander didn't see it necessary for them to be taken into the air. Bartlett had some problems with that. It left him to fly the outdated F-4 Phantom with Genett seated behind him. That plane had by far the worst record of any aircraft, even though it was refitted with all the technology the newer Hornets boasted, he still hated the look of the thing, on the ground and in the air. I can't blame him either. The Phantom in its days of deployment had 3 to 1 odds of its pilot coming back from the air alive. The original had only prototypes of the missile guidance system used now, and had no machine guns to fall back on. Enemy fighters could come in close and take advantage of its pitiful ability to engage other aircraft, since the missiles barely hit twenty percent of the time. Captain Bartlett's version had a much better performance record, and considering his skill, he could out-fly even the new Yuktobanian SU-37s.

We flew in a tight formation. It hadn't been that long since we had arrived, so the captain still called us nuggets and treated us as such. It wasn't more than a few minutes after we flew over Cape Landers that the command room sent a sit-rep.

The alert went to all the aircraft and Captain Bartlett pulled his plane high.

"Aw, gimme a break; I'm babysittin' nuggets up here!"

"Command room to Wardog Squadron; We have leakers, aircraft type unknown, crossing the border at Cape Landers bearing 280 to 302. Captain Bartlett, your group is the only one close enough to make the intercept."

I was confused; we all were. There was some panic, everyone chattered over the radio 'til Captain Bartlett's voice cleared over the rest.

"Baker, Svenson, go trail and stay close. The three of us will go high and engage the bandits. All other aircraft stay low and out of the fight."

All instructors flew off leaving us to fend for ourselves. I heard him clearly. He directed us to a low altitude area. Supposedly it was away from the bandits. There were seven of us in the air that day. Luckily, it wasn't everyone in the squadron. Thank god Blaze wasn't at risk that day.

It was calm there. Below, I could see seagulls flying toward Sand Island and the white-capped surf move south with the ocean current. I worried if the bandits were too much for Bartlett. Even he could be brought down if he was outnumbered enough. I let nothing else come into my mind. I kept my ear against the com. There was nothing. No orders from the Captain to the other instructors. It was like the enemy just wasn't there. It felt like a long time before I heard Bartlett's voice came over the com.

"Where the hell? Command I see nothing over here."

At the same time my missile alarm went off.

I think going into a stroke would be the best way to describe the feel of the situation I had at the time. My heart wanted to burst out of my chest and through the canopy into the open sky. My wrist shot back without me giving any command to move. The stick was almost breaking in my hand. I felt the 9 G's push against my body. My blood rushed out my head as my nose turned up and over again. When the alarm went off, it was like waking from a nightmare. I saw two of my team members flying on each others wing right in front of me. They screamed and cursed over and over on the com. I saw the enemy then. The sun reflected off its canopy. It was close. I could tell it was an SU-27, the mainstay fighter for the Yuke's air force. He was in a perfect position, just waiting for the radar to lock-on to the target. My eyes seemed to be frozen in that position. I didn't want to see it or believe it was real. It was intense.

"Mostain, you're being spiked! Jink right, now!"

I don't know if he heard me or not. The enemy plane let fly a missile, the next moment I saw the explosion below the F-5E. It blew apart quickly, sending shrapnel in to his wing man. I didn't have to look for chutes. I knew they were both dead. The enemy passed in front of me not a second later. I was quick to get on his tail. He noticed me right away, moving left to right and rolling down to avoid a missile lock. I kept on him trying to keep his tail in my HUD. As soon as the radar locked I blew him away.

"Aw damn it all! Edge, shake off the bandits, and get clear of the area."

It was Captain Iblis, call sign Svenson, one of the instructors of Wardog squadron.

"You hear me Second Lieutenant?"

"Sir, there's too many to…" I never finished before he cut me off again.

"Shit, get out of here."

I didn't listen to him, as you might have guessed. I turned back into the dogfight. Another trainee went down. The canopy blazed with a huge flame until the entire body exploded shortly after. I didn't take long to react to it.

The SU-27 took a deep dive to a lower attitude before it changed vector. I guess it was trying to get out of range and run. The negative g's pulled hard as I moved to get behind him. All at once, my head started to arch and swell from the force. I felt my body fight against the restraints when I had him spiked. It slowed down then. I saw the flaps roll his plane. I saw the nose pull up for a hard turn, even though we were going supersonic. My breath echoed in my ears. I looked down at my stick seeing the red missile launched button. Then I started to think of the pilot inside, not of the fact that he killed my comrade. It was the longest and tensest moment I ever felt. I thought for a second that if I looked up, there would be an Osean insignia on the wing, and that the entire thing would be a mistake. That was stupid. I knew where the bandits were from. It was kind of hard to miss when you think about. The only real question was why. That wouldn't be answered until it was all over. My thumb was firmly down and the missile dropped and ignited its solid fuel thruster before destroying the bogey.

"Target downed. Geez…fuck it!"

There weren't any more appropriate words for that situation. It all had gone to hell on a day that was supposed to be easy for us, a day easy enough for a lot of the squadron to be on the ground. I wish I did more to help now. I wish I had shot that bandit before it hit Mostain. It was all too late then though.

"Nagase, follow my tail back to base."

"…..Roger, sir."

"Heartbreak One, This is Baker. I took some heavy shrapnel from a missile, but I think I can still land this thing. I'll see ya down there." It was the other instructor, Jonas. Iblis, or Svenson, was hit by a missile fired from a head on engagement, he didn't have a chance. Baker took a missile from behind but still managed to evade the other bandits back to base. He wasn't able to land correctly though and his plane caught fire, exploding and killing him in the process.

All of the trainees that went into the air were killed that day. I wonder if Genett would've still published the article on the Captain, if he'd been allowed to. I didn't know him that well back then, not as I know him now. It was the second-to-worst landing I ever made. I couldn't think, start, or react right. As soon as I was out of my cockpit I just stared out on the runway. Sweat covered every part of me.

"Sorry bout' this."

I was exhausted, confused and disoriented. I learned to get over it fast on my later sorties. Bartlett walked over towards the command room, no doubt to complain and perhaps even kill a few people over what happened up there. Not even that old blockheaded base colonel could be angry with him.

"That pilot in the number seven was amazing. Did you see her fight back?"

"I couldn't bear to watch."

He called out to me as he was speaking with Genett.

"Nagase, you keep flying like that and you'll die real soon."

I barely heard what he said. It was like he was screaming through a brick wall to speak to me. I looked up slowly and said, "I won't die, sir."

That day was too much. Officially, the engagement never happened. I don't think Captain Bartlett's mission report was even written.

"Are you sure? You look like you couldn't hurt a fly."

I didn't think about anything then. I just stared at the black tar reflecting white amber light in to my eyes. Despite the loud noises and the battle that occurred overhead that day, the shore birds of Sand Island always flew, no matter the weather or other factors. They are an inspiration to all pilots in my opinion. I think I might have told Blaze that every time we came back safely from a mission, right before the debriefing. A bird lives to fly, and so did Blaze and I back then. There was nothing there to get in our heads when we were Captain Bartlett's Nuggets at Sand Island. Just little shorebirds, flying out to sea once in a while, that's what we were. The reflection of Genett's camera came into my eyes. I came out of my daze and tried to smile a bit for the photo, even though I must have looked like a white flower then. I could feel my face stinging as the blood came back. He only took that photo and then stumbled to catch up with Bartlett.

I'd never heard or seen an airbase more sober than that afternoon and the eventual night after. It was eerie how silent it was in the crew room. That was to be expected since many of them died in the air. I tried to take nap, but I couldn't get my head clear enough to relax, even though I was exhausted. I ended up taking a very long shower instead. The hot water running over my body let a lot of the pain go away. My muscles relaxed, and I started to look more like I actually had survived the battle. We were all called to be debriefed not too long after. The room was made to accommodate all of Wardog Squadron. Naturally, it now looked empty. Bartlett lay back staring blankly at the ceiling. I guess he too was having anxiety about the day.

A hand came on my shoulder and a familiar voice said, "Say Nagase, I hear you bagged a few of those bastards today." It was Davenport. He was probably the most talkative person I had met. He just wouldn't stop sometimes. While Bartlett and the other instructors thought it irritating, most of us found it entertaining.

"Well it seems we're all here now."

Everyone that was there quieted down only a few moments after the Captain sat up.

"I know you all don't like this, but we're short on people. So all you nuggets are gonna be sitting alert. If we launch, stay glued to me up there. Nagase…"

"Sir?"

"You'll be flying number two on my wing. Gotta keep an eye on you, or who knows what you'll get yourself into. Davenport, I'll put you in at number three…"

It was almost like someone had planned it, but Blaze walked into the room right then. He immediately took the attention of Bartlett and everyone else. He seemed oblivious to what was going on. I think he didn't even know there was a debriefing going on. Bartlett smiled a little when he saw Blazes face.

"Well, speak of the devil."

"Sir?"

"Welcome back, Second Lieutenant Blaze. Hey, since you timed your entrance that perfectly kid, I think I'll have you fly number 4. Understand?"

"Sir, was there an air battle today?"

"You bet there was. Something none of us saw coming. Okay people try to get some rest, okay?"

It was an unusual situation. It seems we were no longer training squadrons and had become operational squadrons. For Blaze, it all happened while he was seeing a marine major. Neither of us could say that we weren't scared or terrified.

I saw Blaze that night in the crew room, playing his guitar. It was something that everyone on base was accustomed to seeing him do during nights when he was off duty. I can't remember exactly why I went there now. I just know it was his guitar that kept me there. He wasn't playing anything anyone knew, just pouring out what was in his head, which seemed complicated and confusing, which was the best way to describe how both of us were feeling at that moment. I'd listen as his fingers would dance along the frets while he strummed different cords and made up riffs that he repeated again and then later again. Genett came in at some point. I didn't notice and Blaze didn't either. He said though that he was very impressed by the skill of Blaze's guitar play. He stood out of sight for a long while until Blaze stopped.

He clapped lightly and then Blaze and I both stood up.

"That was…great. If you don't mind me asking, are you Blaze?"

"I guess you've heard about me."

"Well what I heard was that there was a great guitarist in the squadron. I thought you must be him."

"Yes sir, I didn't get your name…."

"Of course, I'm Genett, the reporter here to tell the story of the Wings of Sand Island."

"Is that the title you'll use?" Blaze asked.

"Titles are usually selected by the editor, but that is what I'm leaning to."

I was about to leave at that point. Genett seemed he would have Blaze's attention for awhile. I didn't get far though. I was at the door when he called back to me.

"Oh wait!"

He stumbled over to me, nearly taking the chair with him.

"I'm Genett, we saw each other after landing."

I shook his hand regrettably. I knew exactly what he was going to ask me, and I didn't want to answer.

"I know this may seem…a bit unsettling right now, but I'd like to ask you about the battle today."

I had no real right to be upset over him asking me that question, at the time. He was right, it was very unsettling. I looked away from his eyes when he asked. I focused on the ground not wanting to look at Blaze, who also wanted to know about the battle he missed. I knew I had to get over it, I just didn't know if I could.

"Not right now. I'll see you later."

I ran from the room.

Sleeping without resting. It was awhile before I managed to even reach REM sleep. I was so wound up. Like there were pins being jabbed into my skin when I rolled around on my bed. Sleep is something very strange. It is the point where we're most vulnerable. Yet it is something we can't do without. In lack of it our performance goes down, and the capability to make a catastrophic error goes up. Still it wasn't until after the war that I learned how much I missed it.

At 0800 hours the following morning we were called to a briefing. It was going to be our first real mission with the new squadron. The group came out with Blaze, me, and Second Lieutenant Davenport along with Bartlett as the flight lead. I was about to lose it after the other day. I don't know why I didn't. Maybe it was the fact that Blaze and Bartlett didn't seem so worried. Well from the briefing that morning no one would have been.

The room wasn't very large. In the center was a long conference table. Bartlett sat on the far end, Blaze three seats down on the side opposite of me, Davenport a seat behind me. The base commander would stand at the other side of the room next to a projection screen. His adjutant, Commander Hamilton, would stand on the other side. It was about five minutes after we all sat down before they entered.

"At ease people, but don't get too comfortable. This is a grave situation for all of us right now. Let's get this briefing started."

Hamilton began to speak then, "Another aircraft of unknown origin has entered Osean Federation airspace. We have confirmed the target type as a strategic recon plane flying at very high altitude. Despite our repeated warnings, it continued to penetrate our airspace and was fired upon by Osean Coastal Defense Force SAMs. We believe one of our SAMs damaged the unknown plane but did not destroy it. Radar shows that the aircraft is currently losing altitude and is attempting to egress "feet wet" toward the ocean. Intercept this target and force it to land for identification. Do not fire upon this aircraft until further orders are transmitted."

Almost immediately we were in the air. This time, we were ready for an attack. The command room rolled back the F-5E for the much more powerful F-18s. Bartlett flew lead with me on his wing. Davenport flew number three and Blaze sat in the rear at number four. We were a small squadron, but we were the only thing close enough to intercept the spy plane.

"This is Heartbreak One of Wardog Squadron, we are approaching the target."

It was a few minutes of flight before we reached Cape Landers. The plane had fallen in altitude and had reduced its speed greatly. We came up on it almost as fast as they came up on us.

"This is AWACS, call sign Thunderhead; roger, bring the target to the ground. Do not fire on the target. Repeat, do not fire on the target."

I wonder what happened to the pilot of the spy plane. He should have been able to get out. We didn't shoot him down that's for sure.

"You got that, nuggets?"

"Wardog two, roger," I called back.

"Wardog three, roger," Davenport said.

I'm not sure what Blaze was thinking at that moment, but he didn't have his mind on the mission. When he failed to respond Bartlett fired back.

"Wardog four, hellllooo! Can you hear me kid? You better be marking our tail son."

"I'm right behind you, sure."

"Well you sound confident at least," said Bartlett.

I was really curious to how Blaze was going to fly then. He always had a lot to think about. Then he had to deal with the loss of all our fellow pilots when he was away. He probably felt worse than I did about that day.

"Man I'm glad you drew the short straw instead of me," Davenport said. He referred to the fact that in a pursuit, the tail position was the one that got fired upon first. Anyway, that was before any of us really knew about Blaze.

"Second Lieutenant Alvin H. Davenport, zip it! You need a nick name too?"

"I respectfully asked to be called Chopper, sir. I'm afraid I may not be able to respond to any other moniker."

I miss that name a lot.

"Hmm, that does fit you well. I have a better name for you but I'll keep it to myself. Okay?"

"Aw, cut me some slack man."

All that useless chatter, and yet he was even more obsessed with Rock n' Roll than Blaze was. If only some things were left untouched.

"Tally ho, we got company."

We changed vector to come up right on the tail of the spy plane. It didn't look like much of anything at that distance. It looked like a pack of black birds flying together. At closer proximity, the body of the SR-71 became more apparent. It flew as though there was huge load on the left wing. The engine wasn't putting any power out at all. If it was, it was not worth mentioning.

"You're forbidden to fire on the target till I give the word all right."

"Yes, sir." Blaze sounded reluctant when he responded.

"Good boy."

The streamline shapes of the plane moved away as I pulled up next to it. It couldn't defend itself if it wanted to. But it still was flying away at full speed.

"Ok, where's Motormouth Chopper?"

"What! That's your name for me?"

"You got a knack for comic dialogue. You mind sending a surrender request for me."

"Oh, please, age before beauty."

He had such an attitude that was inappropriate for an officer of any rank. Not one person ever reprimanded him for it though.

"I'm real shy around strangers ya know."

"Geez…Testing, testing. Attention unidentified air craft. Change course for our beacon immediately."

"Good."

"uh…we will direct you to the nearest air base. Lower your gear if you understand."

"He's still flying," Blaze said. The air craft seemed to turn its heading out to sea. I don't know if he still thought he could get away. His aircraft was too badly hit to make it back. I saw Blaze almost get close enough to see the pilot. He flew his plane so smoothly. It looked as though the auto pilot had engaged. He broke off once Thunderhead's voice came over the com.

"Wardog, bogeys crossing the border at vector 280, altitude 6,000. Coming head on. Hold your fire until further orders."

"Crossing the pond to give cover for their spy plane. Now there's a fighter pilot worth his wings. Hey kid, you're not to fire till I say it's okay. Right?"

"I heard you the first time Captain. I hear you loud and clear."

"Heh."

We grouped back into formation, this time though we were spread out on each other's wings. The planes then appeared on my radar.

"You ready for this Blaze?" I asked.

"I'll hold my own. Just don't get too far from me."

Four dark shapes came out from the clouds, like phantoms in the sky. The shapes grew more into planes in a few seconds. My eye froze on them. Like hawks coming down for a kill they changed vector right for us. I blink as a missile thundered off a wing towards Blaze. "Blaze!" I don't think he heard me. His plane rolled out and the missile flew down into the ocean. I was dumbfounded for a microsecond, and then I jinked right as another bogey fired its guns at me. How he could have been that good then? It's understandable now, with all the experience we have, but he had never been in a dogfight before then. He really is the Ace of Aces.

"Oh, they're firing at us," Chopper said.

"Hold your fire till further orders," Thunderhead shouted.

"Oh, c'mon! Those aren't blanks they're firing at us."

I guess the dialogue distracted me. A bandit almost locked on to my tail, but disengaged when Blaze came up on him. That was the first of many close calls.

"Shut up and fire back!" I'd never heard Bartlett like that before.

"Wardog, I ordered weapons safe."

"Shove it! I'm not going to let any more of my pilots die"

We all broke loose each other. I picked up the tail of a bogey on Chopper's tail, in the corner. Chopper pulled down and the bandit pulled right. I stayed on him long enough to heard one of the bandits explode, and then Bartlett whistled over the radio.

"Enemy kill confirmed. I must say that was impressive."

"One of ours just went down," one of the bandits said.

My radar lock went red, and my missile went straight into the wing of the SU-27. That time he didn't have a chance. The plane burst into pieces, and I confirmed the kill on the radio.

"You mind if I get this kill? 'Cause I will you know." Chopper asked Bartlett over the radio. The tension must have dissipated by then, they didn't seem as frightening once you shot some down.

"Go ahead."

It must have been less than three minutes after that that we had shot down the rest of them. We all were high on adrenalin over the dogfight.

"Enemy recon plane down."

"Aw, what a shame. Too tired to party," Bartlett remarked.

"Chopper, you still holdin' up?"

"Yeah, but not as well as you flew out there. You were like lightning, Kid."

"Cut the praise for later. We have more company."

"Bogeys, head on from 280," Thunderhead said.

Blaze didn't waste any time then. He pushed faster than all of us were going and locked onto the lead plane of the formation.

"Hey watch out. They're coming at us fast."

I pulled down and came up behind another. He was better than the other one. I nearly passed out keeping up with his sharp turns. I came in closer to get him in range. Too close. "I'm in gun range. Damn." I pressed hard on the trigger. The right engine lit up and set some shrapnel onto my plane, putting a small crack in the canopy. It held though.

"Aw, fuck. Kid get one of these guys for me."

"Roger."

"Damn, they have no reinforcements! Hurry up and shoot 'em down!" A bandit yelled through the radio.

"I'm hit! I….."

A fireball was all that was left of the planes Chopper and Blaze had caught. Bartlett also shot down two. It was boost of confidence to see how well we preformed against them. The Captain certainly was happy.

"All enemy aircraft shot down," Thunderhead called to us, "All aircraft RTB."

"Well seems we can hold our out here. Hey kid. To commend the fact that we all came out of this alive, I'll allow you to keep your nick name. From now on, I'm gonna call you kid no matter what. Got it? Good."

"Man I swear…"

I really think Blaze didn't want that nickname. I think it was more for Bartlett than it was for him. Still, it would stick to him for a long time after that battle.

-I personally don't think much of this chapter. I know have made mistakes so tell when you find them. Sorry again for the long wait.

-Please send me your thoughts and have a nice day.


	4. Open War

(Blaze)

Fire

Sometimes when I look back on it now, I can't understand how or why I flew so well, on that day or all the other sorties I had. I often had trouble stomaching the idea of shooting another plane down, at least when I was on the ground. I don't know if it is because of the pilot or the aircraft itself, but I had hoped for it to never have to happen. I knew that would prove to be false though, as it did. When in the air it was as though my conscience had taken a seat on the ground not putting a hand into what I was doing. It was just an action-reaction situation; try to get behind him before he can think. That was the only trick to flying I could think of at the time.

It's the rush, the pouring of adrenalin that governs a pilot's reactions in combat. Because of that, a pilot will always go with his first instinct. What determines your skill in fast paced dogfights is how correct one's instincts are.

My instincts during that battle were okay. But I still had a lot to learn.

I remember the glare of fire piercing my eyes before the thundering sound of the explosion, when my missile hit the fighter that was going after Chopper. They evaded and I followed, they fired I pulled right, over and down. I pulled away from the explosion when another bogey trailed across my nose. He pulled a hard left. And I followed him.

That was the first time I knew it was a Yuktobanian. The faint image of the leaping was just visible as the jet passed in front of me. It shocked me for a moment. I, like everyone else, was still under the illusion we were at peace with Yuktobania. But the realty of the dogfight soon took that surprise away.

He was good, at least better than I was at that time. He had sharp evasions with hard pulls that made my eyes seem to shrink back into my skull. I think he was the flight lead. I can't remember, but there was a flash of some insignia that the other aircraft didn't have.

He was pulling away when I caught him. We had climbed pretty high when he rolled so he could pull down. Big mistake though, I saw the flaps move one up and one down, and just pulled hard up and to the right letting my gun blaze. He didn't have a chance to get out. The cockpit was the first thing the bullets hit, and as the plane moved down they tore it to ribbons of aluminum and steel.

I pulled into a dive then, getting a grand view of the Captain fighting. He wasn't as sharp as I was, but he never wasted a second. It wasn't action-reaction to him, it was more like chess. Thinking five moves ahead because he knew how his opponent would react. I started to think like that too eventually, but it all went too short for to get as good as Bartlett. He downed the plane he was following with the precision of sniper. I doubt he ever missed when he had a lock.

All the planes were shot down then. I was pumped with adrenaline and didn't think that we had just held our own against a force over double than what we had. Bartlett seemed to know though. I guess he had some good insight into the squadron we would become as the conflict went on.

"All enemy aircraft shot down," Thunderhead called to us, "All aircraft RTB." I was already starting to have misgivings about Thunderhead. He was the AWACS commander you wanted looking over your shoulder, though he and Chopper hand a lot of spats with each other.

"Well it seems we can hold our own out here. Hey kid," he was calling out to me. "To commend the fact that we all came out of this alive, I allow you to keep your nickname. From now one I'll you Kid at all times. Got it? Good." I had never given thought to a nickname, but I 'm sure it wouldn't have been Kid. It was like him not giving me the chance to answer. He was a hawk if you ever could call a person one.

Despite that fact we went against direct orders in downing the enemy aircraft. The atmosphere of everyone on Sand Island was, to say the least, ecstatic. I guess everyone was glad we got back at the guys who opened fire on the training team. I guess I should have been glad since that was my team, but honestly fighting that battle was nothing if not frightening, even though it tunred out remarkably well for us.

Bartlett was sent to Colonel Perrault's office the moment we landed. The three of us didn't have to wonder what that was about. Bartlett grumbled later about it being a waste of time. He said he would be a Captain forever. I found that hard to believe even though I had heard of the record he had since the war with Belka fifteen years earlier.

"Are you just going to sleep there the entire night or will you actually get to your quarters," Chopper said shaking me.

I was in the crew room and nearly falling asleep while I was staring blankly into a photo of an old F-4 Phantom II. I was thinking about a lot, Lars for the most part. He had gone through all this before. I wondered how he felt about the conflict that has happened, about my becoming a pilot. More than likely he was for peace, but he would empty every shell and every bullet at the enemy if he was a commander. He has that attitude about war which always seems to contradict itself. Strangely enough it is the attitude most of the great commanders in history have. Love peace hate war, but will fight savagely in the line of duty, the thin red line which I think I still walk, unofficially of course.

"Blaze, for the best rookie pilot in the Osean Air Force you have the strangest attitude for a green lieutenant," Chopper said to me.

"What do you mean?"

"I mean in the air you are like a machine flying. But down here you are pretty docile and you barely ever say anything."

"Well I think I've have always been that way. At least to most people. So what?"

"Yeah well, just so you know Nagase, has taken a nice liking to you. You could be at least a little more alive to her. Anyway sleep tight."

"Good night," I'm sure he didn't hear me. Even if I shouted it after he wouldn't have. Davenport, Chopper, was cocky and at times a motormouth, but it wasn't just an idle bluff. He had some of the best instincts I have ever seen.

That was the strangest night I ever had. I was tired. I felt as though I could sleep through the next day, but I sat awake in my bed just staring at the ceiling. It was as though the adrenaline hadn't run out. I felt spiked, my senses acute to everything around me. At one point I imaged the sounds and the visions of the day in my head. The missile blowing the wing clear off the air craft, the bullets tearing through the light body of the SU-27, all passed like a rush of pain into my mind. I thought I could hear the scream of the pilot as he lost control and crashed. I felt I could see the 20mm bullet decapitate the pilot as it burst faster than sound into his neck. He never had a chance to scream. I recreated it on purpose over and over again trying to find a reason for it. The more and more I couldn't the closer I came to it. What is the real meaning of war? Selfishness, or heroic sacrifice, it could be both at the same time. Maybe it is the frantic survival instinct that pilots have that causes war to happen. Maybe it's all of those and more. Even a nuclear disaster couldn't show us the volatile futility of it, I can't think of anything, then or now that will.

Eventually, when I couldn't fall asleep myself, all the stress wore out what ever it is that keeps a mind awake. I didn't sleep that long, but I did sleep deep. I woke at 5:30 am the next morning, a lot earlier than I needed to. Still, I felt as though I had overslept.

The attack on Sand Island that occurred on September 23, 2010, and the air battle over Cape Landers on the next day, was all covered up. The Colonel made it pretty clear to us that we couldn't leave the base or tell any one about it. Some people at the base even weren't sure it actually happened. The unidentified aircraft were even rumored to actually be UFO's. Perrault even went as far as to lock the journalist, Genett, in quarters till it was resolved. I'm not sure who it was in the administration that was trying to cover up the battle. Whoever it was though had a right mind on his shoulders for what happened after that.

The next two days we spent doing triple duty air patrols. They were some of the longest I have ever done. Two straight days of continuous flying made us all a little bitter and tired. And I understand why Chopper nearly knocked over a few of the replacement pilots. I stopped him before he did anything that would get him kicked out of the squadron. He wasn't about to let what it was that they said to him go though. I wonder if he ever did.

"They might as well shut their mouths. Because of the battle they are assured slots in the squadron, or some other one," Chopper said.

"They're probably just as tense about it as you are," Nagase was there too. She was writing in that book she always had with here when she was in the crew room. "You might as well just calm down."

"Yeah I'll sure calm down when we find whoever blew the entire training team to hell. Dammit, it's like we are just going to sit here defenseless until a war breaks out."

"Well hopefully there won't be a war. Fifteen years isn't long enough time to forget what happened after the last one," Nagase said.

"But there will be," I said to them. I didn't really mean it come out so bluntly though. "They already have attacked us and have sent spy planes over in our airspace. And when we found the plane they tried to splash all of us."

"Yeah, I hate to pessimistic about this too but he's right. Why else would they come so close together," Chopper agreed.

Nagase was a bit agitated but she wasn't really angry. She closed he book and got slowly, then spoke softly, "I just don't want to have to shoot anymore pilots down. It's harder to sleep after each time."

Both Chopper and I could relate whole heartedly. That night we all sleep a little better even though they were that thought of the inevitable. Looking back now I can see it was so out of our reach. It was only by shear chance that it happened while we were at Sand Island.

The next day was uneasy. The patrols over Cape Landers came up black of any other enemy activity, which was good thing from one point of view, a very bad from another. I hopped that the commander over in Yuktobania that attacked us was rotting n some prison waiting to be court marshaled. That was what I hoped. I think even Bartlett knew what was going to happen. From what I had heard about him he had a lady friend over in Yuktobania, but she broke his heart around the end of the war fifteen years ago.

Pops told that one. He was shot down with Bartlett and they both made it across the font lines back to Osea and both of them had virtually stood still in the ranks. I was kind of glad about that. I haven't met anyone who my plane in shape like Pops. It all would have gone differently for sure, if he wasn't there.

September 27, 2010: Damn, I wish this day wasn't on the calendar, along with a few dozen others.

I remember nearly steeping on a razor blade when jumped down from my bed, and the LASM missiles on my F-18 Hornet nearly blow us all to hell when a truck lost control nearly crashing into my plane. All of that was enough for the day.

At 1030 hours I was in the briefing room when the scramble siren went off. I ran to my plane as fast as I could and was in the air only five minutes later. I had no idea what was happening till Bartlett started to scream at me. "Hey Kid, stay close to tail and form up. The same goes for you Chopper."

"Wardog, this is AWACS Thunderhead. Unmanned reconnaissance drones returning to spy vessel. Shoot them down before they escape." It was a simple enough instructions but it soon became a repeat of two days before.

"You got that, Nuggets?"

"Yes, Sir."

"You're not to fire on the ship. Understand?"

I didn't really hear him then, but somehow I understood what he meant. "Yes sir."

"Show me what you got, Kid."

The air born drones were some of the strangest things I ever had to fly against. Coming up behind they immediately went into a shallow dive alternating from side to side. It confused my missile targeting radar, and shot the first down with guns. They pretty lightly armored, blowing to pieces almost immediately after I fired. All the drones were arranged tow by tow flying toward the spy ship at different vectors. I flew out with Chopper to deal with the farther away ones. Nagase stayed close to Bartlett who was more just keeping an eye over the Ceres Ocean.

"I'm glad there aren't any people in these things. Aren't you?" Chopper asked me.

I wasn't exactly glad of that, but I was sure it would be a great r life when we got back. "Yeah, no remorse."

"So we can just shoot 'em down without having to worry." Good point.

"Hey don't get lax in your flying just because they're drones," Bartlett screamed over the radio.

"Other recon ships have probably already made it to the coast," Nagase said unexpectedly.

"I sure hope not."

I came around the last of the drones. It bobbed down then oddly back up again and its tall was torn off by my machine guns, exploding in a white cloud. "All recon drones shot down."

Sometimes I wish I was able to see everything. So I could have known what was coming. I wish that I really did have the eyes of a demon, and that I could frighten the enemy away, whoever the enemy may be.

"Enemy aircraft detected," Thunderhead came over the radio.

"Same attack axis as before?"

"Vector 280, same vector as last time."

"Dammit, how many planes do they have lined up at the border? We only have four on this end. We'd better abort."

I could see the panes by then. They were almost in range of firing before I was getting enough distance from them. They weren't flying Su-27's. If they were I wouldn't have been able to out run them then.

"I can't make it. They're running me down," Chopper said.

"Oh, so you're taking the trail position today, Rock'n'Roller? Hang I'll clear your six for ya. The rest of you quit gawkin' and start shootin'."

"Wardog, I ordered weapons safe. Hold your fire."

"We're going to shoot 'em all down, Kid."

Not that I think we shouldn't have followed orders, but I wasn't exactly in position to argue. And I didn't want to either.

I pushed hard on my throttle gaining to mach 1 before I arrived in missile range. I fired as soon as the target went red. He whoever he was didn't have a chance. He pulled down way to late, and he slowed own way too much to try and get a lock on me. The missile Struck directly between the wing and the cockpit, which would have sent a whole lot of shrapnel to tar him to pieces. "One of ours just got shot down."

"What? You're kidding. Who was that?"

I came around and saw the traces erupt from Nagase's cannon, striking the fuel tank of the MiG-29. He thought quickly enough. The craft lost thrust and went into a 90 degree drop tumble. He was out before then and slowly fell to the ocean, where that spy vessel must have picked him up.

I nearly lost all just then. The bandit spent barely any time locking on to me. Before I knew it my missile warning light went red and my plane went down. It felt as though I was going to fly out of my plane, then only a second later when I inverted it felt as though my retinas were going to detach right then. It was strange though, I thought I could hear the missile following me at times. I almost picture exactly where it was behind me. A fast rolling and climb separated my from the locking system aboard the projectile and it flew off to crash in the ocean. I saw him then as my light went off. He was pretty good. He had kept up even with all that thrashing I did with the missile and even was close enough to use his gun. I caught sight of his shark insignia emblazed in red carrying the mark of the Yuke Air Force where it would have an eye. It was only a second as he pulled by trying to get around me. I had him though. I jinked right letting my guns fire free. His cockpit was the first to be hit. It exploded sending the wings to burst off tailing fire into the white sky leaving a black trail of ash and the cremated body of the pilot.

"Nice."

Chopper scored some major points that day. He cried loud over the radio as his nailed one head on. "Hey, Kid. You're not the only one with balls around this sky."

"At least he doesn't were them bellow his nose," Bartlett. "Heartbreak One, Fox 2. All right it seems we have cleared up the place."

"Warning still in effect. Keep your heads on a swivel," Thunderhead said.

"Watch out Nagase they're bellow us too!"

I can't really remember what exactly happened. Other than it was the most confusing moments I ever had as a pilot. I looked toward the Yuke ship and the trail from the SAM missile. I thrashed my head around wildly trying to locate it. I rolled up and level to see Bartlett cross in front of Nagase with a missile trail behind him. He pulled left and right but missile closed and it exploded. It wasn't a serious hit, but it looked as though he was losing fuel fast.

"Captain."

"Hey, save the water works. I'm just going to bail out. We can replace these things. It's getting the crew back alive that counts. Make a call back to base to scramble the rescue 'copter and my reserve plane okay."

That was probably the first thing I ever learned about being a flight lead. Captain Bartlett said it so casually, like it was a common truth for all sides of the military for all sides of any conflict. While it didn't make much of an impression at that moment it certainly did later on.

"Wardog, return to base refuel, rearm, and get back in the air immediately," Thunderhead was panicked.

"But the rescue plane isn't here yet," Nagase said.

"Leave that to the rescue team. The enemy just declared war on us."

It was like one of my songs was playing itself through. I had thought about it. I even suspected it would happen. Still it I was quieter than normal when I heard. St. Hewlett, one of our ports was under attack, and we were going to be sent into battle. Captain Bartlett's nuggets with no flight lead and barely an hour of combat experience between all of us, were being sent to war. I didn't want it. I didn't really know what to think of it at the time. It felt like one of the demons from my past, a lost memory coming back. Like those needles that were found in my skin; dark, deceptive, familiar but yet most unknown and alien. It was to strange to be real, like I was dreaming. No reason for that than my own damaged mind. At least that is what I fear. It probably was stress. But I couldn't shake the threatening feeling as we flew to St. Hewlett.

It didn't take that long to make it to St. Hewlett. Even at cruising speed, it was just a hop, skip and a jump away from Sand Island, and we went a lot faster than cruising speed.

Only Chopper was able to speak over the radio, but even he was anxious about what was happening even though we had already experienced real combat.

"Well I can't say we didn't see this coming, dammit!" he commented.

"We don't know the circumstances of the declaration. Maybe it's a mistake?" Nagase mused.

"A mistake? Declaring war isn't something you do over morning tea. Ah man," Chopper responded.

I felt like saying something. But nothing seemed right. And we were almost there.

St. Hewlett looked horrific even from high in the air. We could see the smoke of the sinking ships and the destroyed dock facilities miles before we reached it. None of us could tear our gaze away from it for more than a few seconds, like and ominous bird flying toward us, it made my heart pump faster and my adrenalin run harder.

"This is AWACS Thunderhead, Edge you lead the formation."

"Negative. You take the lead Blaze. I'll cover your six." She pulled off and dropped beside me.

"Second Lieutenant Nagase, follow your orders."

"No Blaze is leading. I'll protect his six-a-clock… and I'm not going to lose another flight lead." I wondered why for a moment . Nagase always seemed like a person to accept more responsibility. But there wasn't really time to start a conversation about it.

A different voice came over the radio, one that would become very familiar later on. "Quit screwing around. This is war. The enemy's all over and they're going to eat you alive."

An F-14 buzzed past us, pretty close too. I guess we were in his way.

"I better stick to the trail position, thanks."

"This is Captain Snow. Call sign Swordsman. Engaging next enemy formation. Give me a position."

That's were it began.

Our primary goal was given to us by Thunderhead as we approached the port. There were a large number of battle ships worth saving, but it made clear to us that we were to protect the only aircraft carrier in the port, the _Kestrel_, from all attack. Didn't seem like much at first. It sounded easy, but given the state of the port it was quickly clear that that mission was going to be anything but easy, even with all the friendly support we had.

"This is the AA cruiser, _Excalibur_. The ship blocking us head, you gotta move away. We can't use our SPY radar."

I was confused, to be honest, of what to tell Chopper and Nagase. The only thing I could think of was man to man defense of the Kestrel.

"All right, target any bogey you see. But make sure not to get too far away that you lose sight of the _Kestrel_," I ordered.

"Sounds good to me, Kid. I won't let them touch that aircraft carrier," Chopper responded.

We broke off and took rear views of the nearest A-6 attacker craft we could see. It seems most of their escorts were shot down by the time got there, but a lot more were coming.

"Omega 3, you've got a bandit on your six."

"Enemy bombers coming in from vector 280. It's no use, there's too many." Even Thunderhead was losing it.

"Pull it together. You're radar control is critical."

The radio was full of cries for help from our side and the Yukes. It was so chaotic, I stopped paying full attention and just focused on all of the enemy planes I saw. I caught one then. He flew from under the bridge and was climbing higher to avoid the Vulcan cannons from the destroyers that were slowly making out of port. I set my vector for straight ahead of him. He almost got the shot off, wherever he was aiming. I blew his wing off with my guns and his spun in a firey dance before hitting the water.

The first time I shot an enemy down the few days before, in my head I could hear him scream for his life. I didn't hear any scream then. I was getting use to combat. That thought was both relaxing and frightening.

"The _Kestrel _has almost made it out of the port. Bon voyage guys." There was a lot of stray ground chatter...or sea chatter.

"Enemies coming in at 3'clock!"

"3'clock for whom? You're not helping here!"

My missile warning light went on then. A MiG fighter had dropped down from the fight with Swordsman to come and cover the bombers I guess. He caught me at the wrong angle though, and the missile lost its target as soon as I pulled up to circle behind him. "Where'd he go? I can't see em." That was a hard maneuver. I could hear the canopy moaning as though it was in pain. If I'd gone a little harder I might not have survived that battle. He did the same thing as I did. We circled each other pulling hard rolls and loops till I finally got his engine when he was climbing. A chute came this time. I'm not sure if he survived though. The water was full of burning oil. It's not likely he would have been able to swim to shore. At that time in St. Hewlett I didn't think once about it. It's almost as though I regret all of it, but there was no way for me to prevent it. And they all say if I wasn't there it would have failed for us. Maybe, at least.

"Aw damn." I was having trouble then. The planes that were coming under the bridge were becoming more numerous. I used two missiles on attackers and a lot of my guns for the fighters. We didn't really have any reinforcements coming, and my plane wasn't suited to land on the _Kestrel_, which we had to protect. I was getting nervous not for my life, but for my inability to fight any more. There wasn't a port runaway working and all the armaments were already blown up. It's so strange that that was what I was afraid off, rather than for Chopper, or Nagase.

"Hey Kid, get your ass over here. I'm fighting three on one."

"I'm on it."

It wasn't just me that responded; Swordsman (Captain Snow) took on one of the three while I took the other that Chopper wasn't fighting. At that moment, I thought Snow was definitely better than me. He was patient behind the stick. He didn't try to get over him at a different angle like I do. As soon as he got the lock the Yuke fighter was history. The missile was a direct hit I remember the plane was almost completely incinerated. The pilot at least didn't have any pain or time to panic.

As soon as we mopped them up, the air raiders began to bug out and we and the _Kestrel_, which didn't take a hit, were safe. I wish the gathering hadn't died down though, then I wouldn't have seen it. The port water, the entire gulf was in flames and your see the fallen there. The best image I want to give you is a bunch of rag dolls spread over a bed or a pool, only you don't have any comfort knowing there fake. I couldn't stand to stay that low. I was twenty-five hundred feet in a flash of a second. I starred forward and flew toward the open ocean trying not to look in the waves.

"Those…those are people floating in the waves."

All of us wished it over then. We had a lot to reflect when we got back to Sand Island, and I'm sure a lot of the Carrier pilots thought the same way. But it wasn't over then.

"This is Captain Anderson of the aircraft carrier Kestrel, my congratulations to those ships and planes that made it out of the port. As Captain I will now form a provisional battle fleet. The enemy had set up a blockade of ships ahead. We need to break through them to escape."

"How can we get through that? We barely have any fire power."

"We have to. It's the only way out of here."

"Wardog are you clear on the mission objectives?" Thunderhead asked.

"Yes sir," I really didn't know what I was going to do.

I wasn't sure if the Kestrel was going to survive then. The destroyers began to open fire then, and Nimrod gun ships were moving toward the Kestrel.

"Chopper, Nagase, form up let's concentrate our fire power," I saw a good way to protect the carrier then. I didn't know if it would work, but it would draw fire off the carrier.

"What are you thinking, Kid?"

"Blaze we have to move quickly."

"I know that flag ship carrier and the leading destroyer are the biggest threats to the Kestrel. If we can destroy or at least cripple them and then provide top cover I think we might get through this."

"Sounds good to me. I have no clue how to win a sea battle."

We flew low to the water masking our selves from the marine radar of the battle ships. "Arm LASM air to surface missiles and make every shot count."

"Roger arming LASM for fire."

The lead destroyer was in view then, like huge fortress of steel and iron. I could see the tracers of the Vulcan Cannons, putting up a barrage that looked like a wall of fire blocking our way. We wouldn't have to get close enough to get hit though.

The HUD went red and I pressed the launch button pulling up at the same time. "Fire and pull out." We were on target. I saw the missiles bury themselves in the metal earth of the hull, and then exploded in a glorious red glare of flame, surrounded with the sound of wrenching steel.

"Destroyer hit. Kid I think this one's going down."

A huge cloud of tracers appeared on my nose. My heart nearly froze. I pulled back and inverted pushing the throttle full until I didn't hear anything striking my plane. Later I found that only the tip of my wing was hit by anything, but the circuitry had major interference. Missile guidance radar began to go in and out. I didn't have any time to complain though. I heard Chopper, Nagase, and another Osean pilot screaming at me to make a hard right. I never saw the plane, just the missile he fired that missed. When looked back I saw the wreckage of his wrecked aircraft fall into the ocean. I don't know who shot him down even today and I don't plan on ever asking.

The enemy carrier had the longest flight deck I had ever seen. No wonder it could launch so many aircraft on it's own against us. I had one LASM left I knew exactly where to plant it so it would go best. Chopper and I both climbed hard as we fired. The carrier deck was flames a moment later. I was out of ammo then. I had only some guns to fall back if I was engaged but my part in the battle was done. The fleet though wounded proved too tough for even the enemy to sink. Only tow ships had been damaged since they left port and none were sunk.

"Yeah, they made it through. That's one tough boat man."

Chopper summed my feeling up then. My first time as a captain; I think it went well for the Osean Air Force.

"So Kid does it feel good to be the flight lead?"

"…yeah it feels great."

(A/N): I'm sorry for all my apathy in getting this out, but I get distracted easily into writing other things. I'll try to get the next one out in week or so. Look for it.

-Stonehenge.


	5. First Flight

Fire

It all seems somewhat distant now, everything about the war. It all passes through my head like a forgotten memory being pulled from underground. It feels as though it wasn't me but some other pilot who shot down so many Yuktobanian fighters, like an old hero you read in history books or see through the eyes of a movie camera. I can remember much though, even about how I felt, but it just seems unfamiliar. I feel now incapable of performing the way I did during the brief conflict, but in mind I know I still can. I'm still drawn to flying as I am drawn to music. It must be that all people want to fly. I never heard of a person who has not dazzled at the concept. Never has there been a kid whop hasn't looked at the blue sky with awe at its freedom.

I guess that was somewhat how I felt after that mission. The Kestrel making it safely from St. Hewlett and none of us taking a direct hit, it gave such a feel of relief to me. It was the first time I flew, or the first time Nagase or anyone flies. A person is unbearably nervous at the beginning, but the pump of adrenalin quickly gets rid of any fear a person has. I didn't have to worry about myself dying anymore, or not being able to protect any of my wing. I could because I already had.

"So Kid does it fell good to be the flight lead?"

"...yeah it feels great."

It was a beautiful sunset to be sure, almost as though all the blood that was spilt that day had painted red. It made the F-18 appear as radiant as an angel, or like that poem:

_Awaken the Razgriz, Its raven wings ablaze in majestic light._

I wish I could have seen us fly by like the crew of the Kestrel. I do remember hearing cheers over the com. We all had a right to be happy that day, especially the crew of the Kestrel. I wonder what Snow thought of us then. He'd gotten into an argument with Thunderhead about us defending the Kestrel. He had a right to be angry, since so many of his pilots went down when the Yuke SU-27 jumped it. The ship though hadn't taken one shot. The other pilots couldn't get even one missile. I think it was more of Nagase's fault for that than mine, though she might say that exact opposite. I didn't really obey the proper protocol for defending a naval target, mostly since I never had that training. I just shot down fighters as best I could. She was more aware of the battle than I was. At least I think that.

"One, two, three…. Count 'em one, two, three planes. Ha I can't wait to tell the Captain when they pull him out of the water," said Chopper.

I think Bartlett would have said something colorful directed on how unlikely it was that I could command the squad, or how he was surprised Chopper could fly in a dogfight and not get bounced by every enemy plane because he talks so much. I don't think of that day as a good day, even though that was day I officially became the head or Wardog squadron. Nagase took Bartlett's disappearance harder than I did, because it was the missile that was first aimed for her that shot him down. Chopper kept trying to talk her into sense, and think she did understand, but still she put the burden of guilt on herself. Chopper covered what ever he thought, if he though anything, up with colorful speech. It's hard to sum up what I was feeling during that time. His disappearance made me anxious, flustered, I guess even afraid, though it was like I was afraid of nothing. Maybe I was afraid of myself or was I afraid for Bartlett, or for Nagase? I've spent much time trying to describe fear on my guitar, not quite an easy thing to do. It's much harder to than hate or love since it is so short lived in comparison. I lose myself in the music so quickly it turns into sadness or anger quickly. I found the best way was to make the music as hoarse and furious as I could. Make it seem to have jagged points and sharp teeth like a childhood monster. Make it cold and mysterious and it becomes something to make people afraid. Even if you are afraid of no one or no thing you still have fear. It's unreasonable and somewhat sad but true.

Fear was ripe at the base then, much thanks to what happened next. All they found of Bartlett was his parachute floating in the water where he had crashed, and the Yuke spy vessel sailing away from the area. We were at St. Hewlett so there was not much for us to do about the ship, and it was well out to see when we got back. There was some good news. More pilots arrived from nearby mainland bases to help support us, since we were now the front line of the war, though there weren't many of them. Still it was good to know we were not the only squadron out there.

Some time after I got off the runway Colonel Perraut called me in to his office. You can imagine what he said to me. It a nut shell I was told well done and that should be commended from command skills, and the Lt. Colonel Ford will be coming over from the mainland to take over the squadron, hell of a way to do that. In truth it wasn't my command, and Ford was technically the squadron leader. I never liked him nor did any else. His attitude toward command was unyielding arrogance. Surely it would have been no different for him as a flight lead. I probably shouldn't say much against him. He's a Brigadier General now.

That wasn't the most troubling thing about that meeting. It was known through small talk and rumor that Bartlett did once have a girl in the Yuktobanian Military, but Colonel Perrault took it as evidence that Bartlett was spying against Osea. For how long he was in the Air Force I think his record spoke for himself. Still I was asked over and over about the Captain's behavior before he disappeared. I think this was the reason much of the hierarchy of the Air Force command never trusted us. Almost every opportunity they hand to discredit our success was taken. I wonder how they thought that would have helped reveal us traitors. The rest of the Military wasn't so block headed but what could they do to really help a small auxiliary squadron on the Ceres Ocean?

It wasn't just me that got interrogated by our own commander; both Nagase and Chopper received the same treatment, along with any other airman that worked with the Captain. That's more or less how I knew it wasn't just my attitude against him. All it did though was to add to our stress and make Nagase a little more depressed than she was when she landed. And to top it off we were still sitting on alert.

I was playing when the air raid came. I must have been feeling angry then, for what the sound came out to be. I don't really know how to describe it. It still remains unfinished. I just started to play Battery, which of all the songs I've written I think is my best, but it came our as some kind of vengeful vendetta. It was anger was coming out for long but rather pure spite, almost as though I could see the object of it all in front of me. I wish I knew what incited this. It wasn't Perraut or the Captain disappearing. The war it self I don't believe was the case. Not the war was too much in its infancy to be the cause. One of the few times I ever really felt evil. Metal is by nature aggressive, but few times do you really hear the sound come out demonic. As the riff went on I just hack and slashed at it, making one of the heaviest rhythm guitar yet. I was almost lost when the air raid siren sounded. What ever was there was taken over by my instinct to fly. If I only knew, if I only know what I hate, then the song could be completed. Still it might be best that it remains unfinished. Some things always are.

I was quick getting onto the runway, even so by the time we were ready most of the over pilots were already up, and locked in combat. Some of them didn't get up fast enough. I can still an F-16 Falcon begin to climb right luminosity tracers hit his fuel tank. The engine blew off and flew for a few seconds after it tore into the cockpit. I wonder why God couldn't have least let the rookie get sight of the enemy before he dies. He couldn't have done anything to have gotten out of that. Thomas would say it was his time, a time for what though? All the rookies weren't doing well from what we see. We were only delayed a minute and a half while they cleaned up the body of the F-16 and three more went down. One was locked in a spinning frenzy as he tried to get behind the Yuke fighter. He should have just pulled hard up and around, but he tried to change vector to the left and was caught. He went down close too nearly right on top of Chopper, who was a having some engine trouble.

"Scramble the jest! Get all flyable aircraft into the air. Move it!"

"Air raid warning. Enemy bombers inbound. Scramble and engage."

"The turbines won't start up. C'mon, c'mon, c'mon.!" Chopper had said.

I'll admit to how frightening it was. I felt like I was more trapped inside the cockpit rather than waiting inside the cockpit. It was a hell of an attack I'll admit. There were at Sand Island way before we were ready.

"The Captain's spare plane is still in the hanger," Nagase said.

"Forget it. Once you're air born get as much altitude as you can fast. Don't let the enemy bounce you from above. Alright, now the first enemy wave's passed by," I should have given Pops more thanks then before and after I realize now. I didn't know it then but he was and probably still is a much a better pilot than me. It isn't much to wonder that all of us turned out to be great pilots with him instructing us on the ground, and Bartlett in the air.

"Blaze scramble. Emergency launch, hurry."

It was sharp take off. I could feel the plane buckle under the air friction as I climbed. The craft was meant to have a lot more speed gained before it flew but it was capable of pulling up at low velocity, at least mine did. The red glow of the fire blocked out most of the light from the stars, making the sky seem menacingly dark. All the better I had to watch myself since the enemy fighters that had attacked were still around.

"Control Tower to Wardog, intercept the bombers. Don't let them attack the runway."

It was a blitz if any thing. Faster than any attack record that was set during the war fifteen years ago. Officially it was twelve hours after the war had begun, and already we were attacked. If they had won at St. Hewlett I think it all would end there. Sand Island would have been crippled with the loss of its only squadron and flight leader, Bartlett. That attack would have succeeded and they would have a runway and a base to launch bombing runs onto Osean soil. The Scinfaxi may never have been destroyed and the Kestrel would be at the bottom of the Naval Port. I wonder if Osea would have been able to defend herself. Would have Harling used nuclear weapons if faced with invasion? I doubt it. I should be glad it went so well but I can't. Not after the loss of so many people I care about will I be glad. But still the other possibilities are too grim.

As soon as I was air my HUD picked up a target. There were three of them actually all three with their guns pointed at me. I didn't' what around I had lock on the lead planed and fired. I didn't really care if the shot was good. He would have followed me up and had me if I didn't. I felt the nose dip down as the force of the explosion gave extra push under the wings not a moment later. Why couldn't have dodged it? He only had to dip the nose close to the ground for a second and the missile would have gone off target. I wonder if that is how luck works, like a coin? Since my shot was lucky his evasion had to be unlucky? It must be. For very winner there is a loser. That's life works. That's the wonderful world scripture tells.

"I see you managed to make it up. Is your plane all right?" Pops asked.

"I'm a little cooked. But we're flying."

"Glad to hear it. I guess keeping it in good shape has paid off."

"That was some shot Kid. We bagged the other two for ya," Chopper said.

"Alright, we got a fix on the bombers yet?"

"Blaze. I see three at vector 320, and it looks like they're fast," Nagase said.

"They're not going to wait for us before they start the next run. Full throttle arm XMAR for launch."

"Sweet let's bag 'em," Chopper said.

That was one of the longest moments I've had in a cockpit. Just the anticipation wound up with them mission criteria and all my natural fears made it seem like I was on the flight line to hell. Well were I was going must have been close enough. They weren't just any bombers we were flying to get but newly built B-1's with an unknown armament. Any experience pilot would be worried and at that time we weren't that experienced, but we had some skill. When I saw the tail of one of them I let one XMAR fly. From were I was it looked like a small bird going to take on a hawk. It's fiery tale beautifully contrasting with the black exhaust of the high velocity jet engines of the B-1. But there wasn't much chance for that hawk to get away. The designer of the plane should get some praise. The XMAR hit directly and it still continued for another minute. I then confirmed the kill. I pulled up a few hundred feet above the bomber and came down and took one of its wings using my guns. The wing blew off and the bomber caught fire. It might be wrong for me to say this, but a plane going down is one of the most beautiful I've seen. Fall to earth in a blaze a flame. It might be ironic but it's how I hope I die. You can take that as you will.

"Ha look at that, Edge. Put another score on my tally," Chopper.

"Blaze all bombers in sight shot down," Nagase said.

"Roger, split up and fend off those fighter from the runway."

"This is Wardog leader, Lt. Colonel Ford, approaching Sand Island. What's your current status?" I felt a bite frustrated when his voice came over the com. I didn't want to deal with him at that time.

"Here comes his highness from the main land now," Chopper had almost as much of a problem with as I did. I don't know what Nagase or Bartlett thought of him.

"This is Base Control, we are under air attack! Repeat, we are under air attack!"

He hailed me, "I trust you can hold the runway until we arrive."

"Yes sir, as long you need."

"Right. Protect it at all costs."

"Fire teams stop the fire from spreading to the ammo dumps!"

"Blaze, I'm reading Attackers at vector 102, directly in front of us," Nagase said, "Turning to intercept."

"Damn we have to stop them here or it's all over. Even I know that," Chopper said.

"Get everything out of here. The ammo too."

"There at Sand Island. Let's go," I really wasn't sure what to do then. Shooting down the fighters was obvious but I no clue what we could do if the. When got closer to Sand Island it was like the seen from a war movie. I've only a few but it seemed to be almost text book apocalypse. The fires were nearly out of control. Almost to the point where Sand Island could have been lost even if the attack stopped there and then, even if the fighter bombers weren't there. . The only thing that would still be left was one runway. I wasn't going to let that happen. Pops was still on the ground, plus several hundred other good air men. They deserve top live as did the pilots of those bombers, as did all the Belkans in the seven cities near the Gate. It's the vicious cycle I shouldn't have been flying against. What I was going then, all the planes I was shooting down made a hero, but it wouldn't kill hatred. It wouldn't kill fear. How much more simpler it would be if we lived in some mythological world. A place were evil came alive as demons and sorcerers and foul beasts. We see the enemy then, a true enemy. If death were to become a hideous malevolent juggernaught it would be simpler. Then we could see the thing that should not be, the thing that truly deserves our spite, rather than ourselves. Still what do I really know? I'm dead as far as most are concerned. My blaze went out long ago to all but a few. "Blaze, Fox 1!"

The XMAR was truly a triumph in destruction. The missile took the bandit down and shredded his tail to pieces before he could react. At least he got out, unlike so many. Why am I so against myself of late? I didn't think twice about at the time. It was mission the same routine. In fact even before the war began I didn't think of much beyond myself and my close peers. Maybe I actually gained something during the war. I must have. Or was it Nagase. She often talked to me about such things. Maybe it doesn't matter what brought this change in me, but it is for sure that I am a different person than I was at that time.

"Rescue teams help out the wounded."

"Aw my rock 'n roll records! They're in my room! It took me forever to collect all those!"

"Chopper how are you?" I asked.

"Tired, but it's not like I'll get any sleep on the ground right now. I'll stay up here as long as I have too."

"Target hit, trailing smoke," Nagase shouted out.

"Take out the runway when you attack this block they're counter attack."

Sometimes I wonder how everyone on the ground functions. They don't have the visibility pilots have. Sand Island must have had a good ground crew. From how well our planes performed and how much punishment they took they always came back. I hope all of them made it through the entire war.

"The ventilation system isn't working I can't see a thing through the smoke."

"Damn it! Where are the fire control crews?"

"Fire! Fire before they do!"

I wish I could go back and see Sand Island. I think it has been closed down due to military cut backs. At least time, all are truly taking part in the peace process. I don't think war will ever be dead, but this victory gave us a boost in moral to relive everyone.

"Pops is taking off," Edge said.

"Hey look at the hanger."

Flying a little lower I could see Bartlett's spare plane heading to the runway.

"Who the hell pulled that out?"

"This is Grimm. I was in the hanger helping out the mechanics. I'm taking off."

"The hell you are! You're not even out of replacement pilot training yet. Aren't there any other spare pilots around?"

"I didn't see any," Grimm said.

"There's no time. Be careful Grimm. I'll cover you," Nagase always seems to have a level head even on missions. I think that is the most impressive quality she has as a pilot. I've never met another pilot who has the same trait.

"I'll try."

"Kid, Grimm' comin' up. I'm not sure he can handle this. Are we just gonna watch?"

"No…we'll have to keep the enemy off him," I said.

"Roger let's give him hand."

I didn't know grim that well then. There's certainly a lot to say about him as a pilot and as a person. Considering how well he adapted and how well he flew in a cockpit, he had better instincts than I did, or maybe he was just a little wiser than I was when his hands were on the stick. I wonder how he's doing now.

"Contact vector 280. Chopper, Edge, stick around and cover Grim while play around with these guys."

"Wait, Blaze, what about you?"

I don't I had an invulnerability complex then. Maybe I had death wish. Nah, I think I just got a big thrill when engaging enemy fighters. I think every pilot has that at some point if they get beyond their fear. On my vector I counted four but I sure there was really more. I only had two XMAR and one side winder left. When they were gone I would only have my guns to fall back on. I pushed the throttle hard and raced to them, prepping both XMAR. This was close, they saw me coming had me in a solution before I had them. ""Fox 2!" "Black 8 Fox 2" I'm not really sure what I did at that moment. It was enough to have made me pass out only a few weeks before then. The felt as though a 250 pound weight was placed on my arms as my F-18 Hornet rolled to the side. My eyes bugged out and my eyes began to ring as though my head in the cathedral bell of my old orphanage. It was like you were launched into a dream and went through wonderland then yanked out by your head all I only five seconds. Once it was done though. Once I saw them I let both fly. That was close I can remember almost every step of the explosions. One impacted the left engine making a wretched twisted sound before the detonation. The other exploded above sending the shrapnel into the cockpit mutilating the pilot and ripping through the plane like paper, and sending his forearm flying off to roll against my canopy. It wasn't really slow. It was over before I knew. Oddly enough now kid of like the first plane I shot down I can just play. When you're that focused I guess it's hard to forget things you see.

As soon as my eyes went back into place, my warning alarms were screaming red. I broke as fast as my plane would go to Sand Island. The other could have had me there if Chopper had actually listened to me.

"Hey…"

"What Kid? C'mon you think I would let get all the glory. Plus you need some watching after or you'll get a missile up your ass," Chopper said.

"Hey what's he doing?"

"Don't stop him. Let him go."

"Control systems are…okay."

"Do not allow them to get any more planes air born."

"Edge one of the bandits got passed us. He's heading your way," I said.

"Roger I see him."

"Hey Kid it looks like a lot more are going to dropping in any time now,"' Chopper said."

"I read you. Attention all Osean planes up, Yuktobanian fighters inbound. Everyone get back to cover the base," I probably was braking ranks big time. I was only filling in as a flight lead and they weren't in my squadron.

"Who's this guy? Is he in command?"

"Don't argue let's go."

"Oil pressure…no problems."

"We've resorted to sending him into battle? This base is toast isn't it?"

"Control Tower to Wardog, multiple bogeys near Sand Island air space. Engage and destroy them."

"Shit. Blaze Grimm's got two skimmers coming for them," Chopper warned me.

"I got 'em."

They were coming Grimm pretty low and I think I was mach 1 when I finally pulled myself into gun range. I hit one and he broke off did a very shallow dive climbed back to altitude. I nearly dove into one damaged hangers when I followed.

"What was that? That guy's nuts!"

I climbed higher and I could see the cloud that was following him and soon as he got enough then he bailed into the Ocean. He was smart at least. Flying a wounded plane you're all the more likely to get hit again and again.

"Engine sounds great. Thank you mechanics."

I was bailing out sweat from my at that point. That maneuver was incredibly tough on the body. The extreme deceleration and then the rapid Acceleration at a 77 degree angle make your head feel as though it was bass drum, low rheumatic pattern of pain of in your head. The hardest missions aren't when you're attacking the enemy that's easy, but when defending your allies, and most of the time that's what we are doing.

""Missile evaded. That was close."

"The enemy is taking off."

"This is Grimm I'm about to take off. Can you see me from up there?"

"You're clear Grimm. I've got you covered."

"Alright engine full power."

"Get up! Get up! Climb!"

"I'm air born."

"Grimm get over and cover mi six," said Chopper.

"You alright Grimm?" I asked.

"Yeah, great. This is Airman First Class Grimm, call sign Archer. Control Tower and all aircraft, I will be joining the Wardog squadron."

"This is the Control Tower, roger that. Blaze take care of them for us."

I guess you could say that was the historic formation of the Sand Island Squadron, but at the time I wasn't what to think about Grimm. Well during the mission I was more concerned with the bombers but at that time it was his first flight and we are worried about him, everyone on the base.

"This is Wardog leader. Sand Island I'm out of fuel. Request clearance to land."

"Negative Lt. Colonel Ford! You can't land! We're under attack."

"All friendly air craft cover me while I land."

"Shit," was what I thought.

"What are you insane?"

"Second Lieutenant Davenport, is that you."

"Yes sir."

"I'll be sure to write you up after I l…."

It was almost not noticeable. Just like a small flash in the distance and the Lt. Colonel's plane caught fire. Maybe he deserved it, but who's to pass judgment? Who am I to pass judgment on a superior officer?

"Third wave closing fast," Nagase said.

"Let's get 'em. Nagase how many do you count?'

"I can see at least nine bombers and several escorts."

"Al right form up Wardog and keep tight to us Grimm this is going to be fast furious. All weapons permitted arm everything you have left," I really did think then that the wave would break through and just level Sand Island. I had one missile left and only half my guns. Chopper and Edge weren't much better. Grimm was the only one who had a full load. I still owe him thanks just for having the guts to get n the air that mission. It's amazing to think that all the small things the happened in our favor won the war. "As soon as we're in range fire your weapons make very one count."

You probably imagine the attack as fire flies in a dark fog.

"Chopper, Fox 2."

As soon as we began destroying the bombers in back all the rest opened fire and the sky became a huge dance of lights.

"Archer, Fox 2."

When shot his first bomber the wing bent off and the sent the hull, which weighs a few tons heavier than an F-18 straight at me. I remember just braking and jerking the stick right and a short left making me do this crazy spin, which disorientated me much more than I ever had when evading fire. "Grimm!"

"What?"

My radar at one point stopped targeting because all the smoke gathering on my plane. All the haze was coming from all the smoke and the natural fog that was in some parts of the sky, so for very short while I was shooting the cannon unguided at only a black shape.

"Edge, Fox 2."

Nagase was the biggest help to me. If she hadn't been my wing man I don't I could have gotten so skilled at flying or combat in general? She's an inspiration. You should to be talking to her not me.

"Blaze, Fox 2."

That was a close shot. I put the throttle as far as it would go and then some .The bomber was just trying to out run us then, drop it's payload on the target so it would be lighter and get away. I couldn't let that go, so I came a little higher altitude and then pulled the nose and fired the missile, and if there was every a lucky shot it was that one. He was nearly at Sand Island.

"That guy's got hands of gold. Where id he learn to fly like that?"

"Not bad Grim. Good job," Nagase said.

"Control Tower to all air craft, all bombers confirmed destroyed. Thanks for protecting our base everyone."

"Was my flying al right?" Grimm asked.

"Not bad. You did good." In truth if Bartlett was the still in command at that time he may have gotten a medal.

"Thank you. It was because of your support

"Well I guess we didn't need to worry about Grim after all."

"Come on let's get a welcoming party going."

(A/N): After such a long time I finally got this done, and I finally have a computer again. To all who have read so far, I thank you. And tell me if I have any errors.

-Stonehenge


	6. Rendevous

Fire

I'm, sorry if I sent any discouragement in you upon your asking, but it is still so soon after the conflict even I'm not all that comfortable with it. I suppose I don't have to be. I wonder how the Captain and Nagase fell about this now. They were so shaken by all this. Not to say I'm not. I wish it all away all the time, but of course….it's a bit foolish of me.

I had not known the Captain, Blaze for a lone time. Actually, it wasn't until I first flew that we actually began to engage with one another. I had seen him all around before then though. I never interacted with really because he's is a bit intimidating at fist when you look into his eyes. You get a feeling of awe when you're in them. But it was mostly his reputation for being very intrapersonal which is the antithesis of what I usually look for in companions. I guess I had false prejudices about him. I think everyone did, except maybe Nagase. She seemed to know him for much longer than any one else on the entire base. How wrong we all turned out to be. He is the best pilot to be seen in the skies. I'm sure of it. All of us are damn sure of it and….sorry. The point is he was the main influence on all my basic maneuvers to all his insane rolls that he pulled off on the missions we flew. Even toward the end of the war he never once seemed to stand still he was always getting better and better. If the war went on any longer… In any event, he can't be shot down unless the hand of God does it.

Captain Nagase seemed to be sort of the angel that guided us. As corny as it sounds It's true, I don't any of us would have lasted as long we did without her. She gave up the lead position to Blaze. I think it was really for the Captain. She had a tough time getting over it. I remember the sort of rampage Captain Chopper went on when she was shot down over Yuktobania. No one in the base could have possibly gotten night's sleep with the uproar he set out. I was mixed when it happened. For the most was sure that she would survive, but when any thought came into my head of her being hurt, or injured I would just shuddered and my mind go numb. That entire night I spent with Blaze. He didn't sleep at all he just kept pacing around his dark quarters. I watched him as long I would stay awake, but I'm not nearly as much as night owl as he is. When I woke up he looked the exact same as he did.

My first flight...It was completely unorthodox. In fact, if we hadn't been she sort of pilots t would have never been allowed and I would have been assigned to some different squadron. Maybe, at least, I remember that it was on the night when the war began. Captain Bartlett had been shot down off the Island and was picked up by a Yuktobanian intelligence vessel. That was unfortunate. A lot of suspicion came over us about that. Everyone thought, still thinks we are traitors to Osea. Well, the President may help us with that.

Anyway, the Island was under bombardment by Yuktobanian forces, and was in the hangar trying to understand just what Pops always talked about when he fixed planes. We were taking apart one of fuel wings on the training jets when a plane that was coming fin top land just exploded over the run way. Then a big piece of debris spun off it like a boomerang and flew into the hangar. It the back wall circuit board and caused an electrical fire. I don't thin anyone really noticed it but me, because only a moment later the runway was bombed.

For awhile I was kind of stuck inside in the hangar, watching the Yuke fighters as they suppressed all our antiaircraft defenses. The rest of Wardog squadron was up only minute later. It was right then that I felt powerless on the ground and looked anywhere for a plane that was still flyable. The one I found first was Captain Bartlett's spare plane.

When I got in sat in the cockpit for a minute petrified of what I was doing, I guess my conscience had caught up to my desires. Once I worked up the nerve I was out on the run way. "This is Grimm; I was in the hangar helping out the mechanics. I'm taking off."

"The hell you are not even out of replacement pilot training yet..," Captain Chopper yelled at me when I got out there. "Aren't there more replacement pilots lying around?"

"I didn't see any."

"There's not time. Be careful Grimm. I'll cover you," Captain Nagase said, though she was a lieutenant at the time and I was just an ensign flying off into a battle.

"I hope he get's up soon. All air craft enemy fighters inbound vector 280. Turn to intercept," Blaze said.

This was the most nerve racking moment I dad up unto that point. Later in war I got much worse ones. I was panicked about going through the checklist that I think I mist almost have of the items. I could visualize the missile coming down and striking my cockpit kill me instantly. And there were some close calls, but Wardog kept them all off me till I was air born.

"Grimm get over here and cover my six," Captain Chopper had called out to me as soon as the gear was up.

"Roger."

Well it might have been a stunning failure on my part if Blaze wasn't there. He flew at my six to give me cover and it seemed that he knew everything that was going on, while I was completely in the dark.

"All right, bombers coming in, 273, It's the second enemy formation."

"Where? I can't see them," I said.

"Look top right, they should be in view." And there were in columns flying toward Sand Island. "There air support is tied let's take them out before that changes."

It was kind of like driving a car foe first time even though I've a little before then. It takes awhile to get used checking your six and keeping track of the enemy. The time when you forget to or when simply over powered is when you're shot down.

"This is Archer. Fox 2." I nearly hit Blaze when I did that.

"Chopper, Fox 2."

"Edge, Fox 2."

"Blaze, Fox 2."

After all the fires had been put out and we cleaned up the rest of the airspace, the ground crews put on a big celebration for us and the other pilots made through the assault. The first ten minutes of the party were as confusion as the air battle had been.

"Grimm, out of training and into a squadron in five minutes," Hey Grimm I heard you got a few of those sneaky Yuke bastards today," "Awesome Grimm, you flew better than any of us on your first flight!" those were the kind of comments that were made to me as I was kind of passed around the room.

Someway or another I found myself sitting with the rest of Wardog squadron at a small table in the corner, with big pitchure of ale. Captain Chopper was going on about the fight. "I'm serious we kick hell as out there."

"I know," Blaze seemed pretty unwilling to engage in Captain Chopper's enthusiasm. I admit he was motor mouth, but that was the trait we loved most about him. As he talked and talked Nagase would simply shake and laugh while Blaze would try to reason with him.

"C'mon man, celebrate in the glory and kills we just scored in the last battle."

"I'm sitting here aren't I?" he said.

"Yeah you barely have said anything. What about you Nagase? How do you think we fared as compared the other squadrons?"

"We've done well but to say we are the best in the Osean Air Force in pushing it Chopper I think," she said.

"No…I mean... Look Blaze how many kill have so far in this war counting today?"

"Five," he said quietly.

"Shit. Don't you see? That makes him the first ace of this war. And we aren't far behind. Even Grimm scored a few kills." I kind of jumped at the mention of my name. I was still very unfamiliar with them at that time.

"How about it Grimm? What do think of the Squadron the second hour you've been in it? Blaze asked me.

"Well uh…it's been exciting." I stuttered out in response.

"Hardly orthodox as well," Captain Nagase spoke up, "A fire fight on the ground, and a dogfight in the air, and now we are sipping a pitcher of beer while the rest of base cheers."

"That reminds me," Chopper grabbed the pitcher and refilled his then empty glass. "I bet the old Perrault is going to have a few ulcers when he sees this room tomorrow."

"More like Hamilton." Blaze said. It's ironic that he said that about Captain Hamilton then. I guess the alcohol had loosened him up, 'because he never would say anything against a superior before of since then.

"What do you mean Blaze?" Nagase asked him.

"Well, let's just say I haven't had the best encounters with him so far," we were all very curious to hear what he had to say. Hamilton was very reasonable, at least I thought so at that point. After that I still had pretty good relationship with the guy. Genett really liked him too. Still, none of us doubted whatBlaze said. I wish we knew more about it then. So many lives could have been saved.

"I think he's all right. I have no idea where he comes from but I still like the guy a bit," Chopper said.

"There're better things to talk about than out superiors. Plus it's rude to gossip," she said scolding to Blaze and Chopper.

"If that's gossip it's the worst I've heard. Plus this is a party we're supposed to lose all sense of propriety," Chopper said while putting his feet on the table nearly knocking the pitcher into my lap.

"What do you think's going to happen now?" I asked and they heard me, turning there eyes right into mine making me want to retract the question. "I mean to us. What are we going to do in this war?"

"Probably just support missions. Escorting bombers to targets and maybe covering a ground offensive. The rest of the time we will just be flying around Sand Island the West coast of Osea."

"Way to read the future, Kid. In any event don't worry Grimm you'll be fine on my wing. And he's right what are they going to do with an auxiliary squadron in a counter attack?" Captain Chopper had remarked. For the rest of the night that thought is what stayed with me, and it was my belief up until our next sortie.

"Why don't you just not worry 'bout it Grimm, we're just pilots in the end. We really don't need to know what Yuktobania might or might not be planning." Blaze said that about a day or two later when I caught him fixing broken circuits in the flight board.

I felt like the World was about to come crashing down on my head. In some sense I was right to do so.

"Yeah, but…This Island is the closets point to Yuktobanian soil. There are no other bases farther out."

"Funny, I thought I joined the Air Force."

"Sir, I mean there's probably going to be another attack on this Island soon. And I have barely any experience in the cockpit, and you have proved to be…"

"I might be an ace by some ancient flying standard Grimm, but you would be better seeking advice from Pops and not me. I've seen him fly Grimm, he probably is the most experienced pilot in all the Usean Continent," I knew I was annoying him, but I wouldn't stop thinking about that debris that flew into the hangar.

Blaze jumped off the plane after inserting the circuit back into the flight board and chased after him like a scared dog away from its master. "Blaze will we invade Yuktobania?"

He didn't move after that. It was as thought he was thinking of it too, like it was a bad crow that was bearing over his head. He turned back to me heavily, as though a huge beam was strum over his shoulders. "Grimm, it's war." There wasn't much to say after that.

I thought a long time about what he said to me. War… it such a dreadful and abhorrent thing when you really put it to thought. Captain Nagase would always have some heated discussions with Blaze that I never understood till now, or at least till after the war. She would always make comments about the destructive influence of hated. Blaze would always seem to be in reserve about it. He once said "Hatred and animosity can help to keep mind focused. Despite what you think we need people to hate each other to some extent."

Captain Nagase nearly bit her lip in half when he said that. She quietly stormed off and I guess confronted him later, for I was told that here got in fierce debate under one of the F-18's. Not to betray my Captain, but I can't see whatBlaze means. Maybe his mind was change since all the attacks of the War. I don't know.

As for me? I only know it hatred that began the stupid war between our two countries. I can see a place for hatred in dark things like war and murder. But I wouldn't know the other side of the argument. I've really neverhated anyone. Not even those Yuke pilots who shot down Captain Chopper.

Well I spent the next few days almost entirely in the air, and if not there than I would be with Pops. I still had this vision of a missile ramming through my cockpit and bursting my plane in thousands of pieces. So I was trying to improve as much as possible for the next sortie. I'm not sure what the rest of the squadron was doing because of that. Nagase preferred to spend her spare time in the crew room away from the noise of the runway. Blaze I knew to usually be on the runway when not in the air doing something with his plane. In any event it didn't seem that long till we were called into the briefing room.

"Settle your nerves down everyone. This isn't going to be a high risk mission. It's general mobilization. Pretty much all the panes on the West Coast they can get their hands on, Air force or not, is going to be flying." Perrault always treated us like he would any bad tempered dog or an unwanted beggar. Even though we were probably the best squadron we ever had. I think it had to Bartlett. He always held disdain for the Captain. Blaze also would get scolded and maybe even reprimanded for all his misdeeds no-matter how innocuous they were. I avoiding him at all possible chance. This kept me from ever really getting in his firing range. Nagase he also seemed to dislike but it was quiet. I'd once seen him bit his lip after Nagase in passing said "Good morning, Sir" to him. Please don't assume I'm accusing him of sexism, but he is fairly conservative commander if there ever was one. Nagase was always the pinnacle of excellence when it came to flying and her duties. Blaze once said to me "When a person's assumptions are challenged, it ends to breed a little animosity." I forgot the reason but I agreed with him entirely at the time.

I remember Hamilton eyed Blaze when he began the briefing. "Despite the heavy losses at St. Hewlett, Yuktobania failed to sink even one of our aircraft carries. We're pulling our carries into our inland sea for protection against further attacks and to regroup our naval forces for our counter attack. Your objective on this sortie is to simply defend the carries as they enter the sea. You'll be in the air with a hundred other fighters so you'll probably not see any offensive from the enemy." I looked at Blaze who if I didn't know better looked bored. "You'll depart immediately good luck."

That mission…it was supposed to be nothing. "General Mobilization" as Hamilton put it; Chopper went as far as to call it the easiest mission in the world. It turned any thing but. And they only got harder after that.

A strong reason for having so many escorts for out three carriers was the weather of that day. There fog and cloud cover thick enough to hide…well to hide an entire enemy attack force. Because that's exactly what it did.

"This is AWACS Thunderhead, you're escort mission is complete. Aircraft may depart for their respective bases in sequence. Aircraft may refuel from the tanker aircraft above the carrier if required," those words came to my relief. I was still incredibly green even though I had been in real battle before.

"Everyone's starting to leave can we go yet?' said Captain Chopper.

"Wardog, I told you to hold above the carrier to wait for the tanker aircraft. Follow your orders!" said Thunderhead.

"Man I swear."

I can't really remember the proceeding moment of that statement. I think I was laughing under my mask while trying to keep formation on his wing. It was probably a few moments or maybe even later that I notice the contacts just on our search radar.

"Edge, are you picking them up?" Blaze asked.

"Affirmative, looks like this isn't going to be such an easy mission."

"What's going on? How come those morns at Thunder-block-head pick this up?" Chopper asked. "Yo, Kid!"

"You have to call him Captain now."

"I know, I know. Hey you think we should report this?" I sometimes wonder if he was truly being sarcastic when he said that. It wasn't exactly unlike him.

"E…Enemy detected all aircraft return to your combat air patrol stations. We have three carriers don't let them sink even one."

Well you might say it was like pounding down a whole shot of Whiskey. At least for me it was. I had been dreadingthose wordsthe entire time, then like hideous beast from nightmare they appeared.

That battle disturbed me more than any of the others. I wasn't used to watching so many planes fallout of the sky at once. Logistically it was also a disaster. Three carriers. That would have been such a help to Osea in Operation Footprint. There was nothing I or Captain Nagase or even Blaze could've done about that battle. At least not then.

Blaze was quick to give orders, and in thelongest second I've ever expierence, wesepartated wing by wing man to cover the carriers.I covered Chopper when he had target, and he cover me when I had target. Blaze covered Captain Nagase and she covered him. Simple old and the best air tactic there is. We still found our selves in a dogfight from time to time.

"All right, Grimm. I got these guys 's pull around and plugged a missile up their damn asses."

"I got you covered."

"Yeah let's Rock n' Roll Grimm."

Chopper and I stayed more or less a head of the carriers and bagged three planes between thee of us. We felt really about that till we found out the blaze had bagged three on his own and Nagase two when we got to Hierlark. I remember the first; my missile didn't hit it exactly. It exploded slightly above the right wing creating a grey cloud of shrapnel. Then it just slowly arc into a dive and crashed into the water leaving a reddish trail of smoke behind it. No chute came out. The others where all pretty much obliterated since the missile directly hit their fuel tanks.

"Grimm, Chopper how are you guys?" Edge said to us.

"Oh just dandy. There is only enemy air superiority fighter flying at supersonic speeds trying to hit us with a high explosive missile which follows you are around when you try to dodge. It's exactly what I look I look for when I want to relax and take a loud off my legs."

"Mamm, we've sanitized our air space."

"Good, but there is still more to be had," Blaze said.

"Wait we didn't hear about your date."

"Cut it, Chopper, we still have enemies over the carriers. Plus there's addition fight coming which Thunderhead says are carrying anti-ship missile. Form up with us and let's take 'em."

The fighting was pretty intense for me then on. We held sufficiently till we were nearly bounced by a five plane harrier formation. Before I knew what happened,my lights went red and pulled that stick as hard right at would. I pulled about ten G's which made my face fell like it was on the other side my head. I got a fix on Blaze when I finally leveled. And….I never had imagined anyone actually trying that maneuver. You see he got missile him and he went into a downward dive then rolled into a sort of spiral circling down sending the missile off into the ocean. I remember asking him at Heierlark where he got the idea for that maneuver he said Pop's had told him. He said it was a favorite trick of the old Balkan air force. I didn't really how he knew that till later.

"Damn, this airspace is going to be a trap," I remember Blaze said as he sighted twelve more planes incoming.

"No kidding. It's like they're air force is up and flying," Chopper said.

"Thunderhead this Wardog leader we have multiple bandits inbound. I need additional aircraft to hold this air space."

"Roger Wardog. This is AWACS Thunderhead all available aircraft turn to intercept bandits."

"This Swordsman, engaging enemy formation."

That was the fist I flew with Captain Snow. Wardog had fought alongside him in St. Hewlett but I wasn't apart of the squadron then. It seems preposterous to even say that now. Now, I'm his wingman.

"All right guys this is going to be tight flux. Grimm, Chopper you guys don't lose each other."

"Thanks for holding our hand, Kid," Chopper said.

"And I hope you don't lose me," he said to Captain Nagase.

"That will never happen." What Blaze said seems kind of….suggestive, now. Well back then I didn't think much of it.

That little skirmish didn't really last long. The carrier aircraft had all finally made it into air through all the relentless attacks by the Yuktobanian forces. The remaining forces retreated without much incident and the skies were clear. Too clear you might say.

"Ballistic missile incoming," Thunderhead had said.

"A ballistic missile? Where'd they launch that from?" I had asked.

That was frightening. If you sat under a train rail while the locomotive was running at full speed above you would have an inaccurate comparison to what that missile was like. I'm hopping to read the research on its development when it is finally declassified by Nikanor and the rest of the Yuktobanian Defense Ministries, just to find out how they made that powerful a weapon.

I remember clearly my cockpit shaking violently and brief blinding flash that lasted only a moment to reveal this molten, crimson rain everywhere. It wasn't as horrifying as you might think of a nuclear blastto be, but it is certainly close enough to turn your stomach. Luckily the shrapnel's (or whatever that missile launched) dispersion patter didn't quite make to where we were. We were low for it to have annihilated us but…someone was watching over us.

"What the hell happened?"

"The carrier…the carrier's tipping." The Buzzard and its escort ships were on fire and sinking bellow the surf.

"How...how did this happen?' Nagase asked

"I don't know. Everything bellow 5000 feet was just annihilated," Captain Snow said.

"Additional missiles incoming."

"Heads up, if you want to survive get your plane above 5000 feet and pray to God you'll be all right," Captain Snow said.

I don't know how high we were at that time but our reaction was instantaneous. All of us pulled God knows how many G's to get to that altitude. 5000 feet, we made with time to spare but a lot of the other aircraft were not so lucky or were not in the shape to do so.

"My plane is damaged there is no why I can make 5000 feet."

"C'mon move it! It's death to stay done here!"

"Missile impact in five, four, three, two, one…" As Thunderhead spoke another carrier and a few hundred went down into the waves. Seeing it from above like that…it was disheartening to say the absolute least.

A lot pilots came back live though. They were mostly from the carriers that were sunk. Out of our original three carriers, only the_ Kestrel_, Anderson's former ship survived. The _Buzzard_, and the _Vulture_ are at the bottom of the inland sea. I guess they were all transferred to the _Kestrel. _I hope not though. Well, you see only Captain Snow remains of the all the _Kestrel's_ planes.

"…This is AWACS Thunderhead. All remain aircraft…respond."

"This Captain Snow, I managed to stay live. Looks like the Wardog squad made it too."

"Wardog, hold above the carrier for the tanker aircraft. Mission complete."

I sort of felt some animosity toward Thunderhead for saying that. I was thinking no. It couldn't be complete. It couldn't even be considered to be complete. Two carriers lost and so many planes and pilots MIA. This isn't an accomplished mission, it is a failed mission. It should be forever remembered in the records of the Osean Air Force as a major tragedy. That's what I felt like.

I almost snapped out at him for saying that. Its good thing I held my tongue. I'm sure Nagase, Blaze, and Chopper feel and felt the same about it. Still what could we do about it? What could anybody do about it besides fight on? I don't any person knows.

"Two carriers gone, I can't believe this is all that is left of our force," I had said.

"Hey, Kid."

"You have to call him Captain now."

"Forget it. I'll start calling him Captain when he starts trash talking like acaptain. Man I'm missing that voice real bad right now."

"He's gotten back from battle that second time now. As far as I'm concerned he's our Captain now."

"That's right and I'll not lose another flight lead no matter what."

After all the horrors and disasters of that day, I still feel strong about the moment, even proud. It was kind of the moment Blaze knew we are all behind him for certain. I was also kind of the time we knew that we would never see Captain Bartlett again.

If that's true, we were wrong.

-(A/N): Slightly sorter than the other chapters. Please review, if there is any righteousness in your heart.

-Stonehenge


	7. Of A Dream

**Fire**

It was like a lot of the battles were, brutal costly stupid…I don't understand the cause of animosity and hatred. I don't understand why they thought it was in their interests to construct those missiles. It might just well have been nuclear weapons. Well, it had the same effect.

We had expended so much fuel during the air battle that we had insufficient amounts to make it back to Sand Island. And for whatever arbitrary reason Thunderhead, and command, couldn't get a tanker craft out to us. So he issued us auxiliary orders.

"Wardog we can't get tanker craft out to you. Proceed North to Hierlark base. Land and refuel," he said to us.

"Hierlark?"

"You wouldn't know Grimm, but that's where we all were trained before we all came to Sand Island, by some miracle," Chopper said.

"The three of you were all trained at the same base?"

"We went to academy together, though I don't recall seeing you anywhere around there Blaze?" Chopper asked.

"I was very busy when I was at the academy."

"No kidding. I heard Bartlett talking about you one day, didn't you earn something around…oh I don't know…tree majors?"

"Something like that."

"Man your something."

"What's that supposed to mean?" I demanded.

"I just mean Blaze here is a damn genius at almost anything he does."

"Yeah, at least compared to you he is."

Grimm laughed and Chopper went into frenzy of chatter and insults before we finally got some peace when Blaze told him to shut up, to our relief.

I have a lot of memories about that place, Hierlark. Well to you it might just be another flight base. I spent two years flying planes over it and it became more familiar than my own birth place.

Somewhat ridiculous but I haven't home in long time. And it looks like I won't get to go home for an even longer time. Harling won't stay president for long, and who's to say that the new president elect will be open to our, coming form the dead I suppose. With what happened to Osea during the President's peace policies the people might fell it necessary for a more hard-line politician to go into Oured. That politician will probably have some resentment about us, especially if he happened to be one of our old commanders in Central. Frustrating but we'll just to roll with it. Except Snow, he was never officially declared KIA, and he wasn't branded as a traitor. In fact he is credited for shooting us down after our escape form Sand Island. Ironic isn't it?

Hierlark is almost invisible if it decided to go dark. A strong reason Osea pushed so strong to get into that territory during the Belkan Conflict fifteen years ago. It's in the center of mountain range and is covered by snow year round, not the most hospitable of places but it's still very beautiful, especially in the spring time. The golden come down the over the Easter Ranges and reflects off the packed snow, making it incredibly bright. It's rumored you can blind if you stayed outside and entire day. No one ever tired it. I remember a small space, a sort of dip in the rock that faced east to West. When early dawn came, the light would hit the top Oden, which is the East Mountain in the region and reflect into the second year trainee's room, which blinded us all into consciousness. I told most of this to you already, but it was good time on that base. Sort of like the Academy.

It was pretty late when landed. The days lasted a bit longer than hey do now and it was well past dark when we touched down. The blackness was added to by the over cast which blotted out the moon and the stars. It would have been close to trying to drive a car at night in heavy fog with your light out. Well, we just stuck close to Blaze and landed softly.

"God, Blaze do you have night vision or something?' Chopper asked.

"You landed it just as well, and no have the same visual acuity rating."

"What…how would you know we have the visual acuity rating?"

"It's complicated."

"Bullshit…"

"This is control tower. Lieutenant we appreciate some propriety over the radio," the tower said to Chopper's surprise.

He stuttered, at a slight loss for words, this didn't usually happen. "Sorr…ry sir."

I pulled my plane silently into the hangar and my mind was filled with a memory when I was still a cadet there. I had once been caught outside as a result of someone forgetting to unchain the door when I was to sortie and my hand nearly to my helmet. I don't like the cold. Besides it beauty there is nothing wonderful about it.

After a dash to the barracks we spent the next few hours surrounded by junior cadets. Genett, the journalist, had written an article that received much acclaim, to his credit. But it made tit here faster than we did. The picture he uses for it was rather surprising. I remover Blaze seethed in quiet laughter while Chopper boasted all over the junior cadets faces. "You see this. Here you see center frame and our brave captain is pushed so far behind me his face is block out! But then as you see since he has barely said to words to anyone beside his lovely wife here, his is quite the shy type and doesn't socialize well, with those of his side, with the enemy…ooohoho, he will give more language they handle in the form of hell fire." I kept quiet mostly during these story telling's of his. I would sometimes exchange comments with Blaze on the validity of his statements the exponential growth of his ego. Blaze was most cynical about everything, but then he seemed to be of a lighter heat. Chopper had that way with all people I suppose. Even Blaze found him entertaining often. Chopper then directed several comments to me about our kill score and I gave an estimated number which Chopper immediately spins into only the number of confirmed kills. "Why I've seen Nagase here kill at least a dozen more than that number. It should be well noted by you nuggets that our commanding officer as great dislike for the Squadron and a big hatred for me. So it's no wonder our records aren't exactly accurate." It's curious even now. Somewhere along the line, completely unintentionally we became the most experience pilots in the entire war. So much so that those cadets were fascinated by us to the point where Chopper's odious and condescending, pompous speech became nothing more than murmur.

My thoughts drifted about Captain Bartlett. Whether it was depression, guilt, or just aggravation from the g-forces my mind kept repeating his name over and over. Every time I thought of that missile coming at me, every time I say the red lights flash in mind, every time I recreated Bartlett's hornet flying across my nose taking the missile with him, every time I reheard the explosion and sound of the ejection releasing, my heart seemed to grow bitter to Chopper, and Blaze, and the cadets for their admiration of us. It was like I furious because they didn't talk about him, because they didn't mention a word of his capture or his flying. II was over it quickly though. I'm smart enough to realize the folly of all my apprehensions. You see if you go into the air with those thoughts, you'll surely come crashing down.

The little gathering took a while to end. The junior seemed like they were struck with awe that they took to leaving to their quarters one by one. Once the last one paid his respects and scurried away we were all left to really fend for ourselves on a place to sleep. Hierlark was overrun with transfers and actually I think for the first time in its Osean history that it was over capacity. So we stayed in the crew room for what seemed like very ling time. Chopper hand begun to go over with Grimm the basics of "one to one" air combat tactics, so he called them, and the conversation demand all of our input and attention. However once that topics were finished we moved on to other flight strategies, titles of which varied and varied even to the put we were on the topic on the ground forces role in a naval beach head assault, until we somehow found ourselves back on the topic of "one to one" air combat tactic which I think was altered into "man to man." We talked and talked until it became so dreary that Choppers hands became Osean military air superiority craft while Blaze's hands became Yuktobanian Su-series. They engage treat and engage with Chopper's planes always emerging the victor as he narrated the transactions that proceeded as the manual aircraft pursued each other. Occasionally Grimm would get up and place his hands horizontally with one directly behind the other, this represented some unknown class of bomber which Blaze and Chopper's manacles (now representing Wardog Squadron) would shoot down. I would have laughed in not for exhaustion at this curious seen and watched it until my eyes couldn't stay awake anymore, and I drifted off into sleep.

I sort of remember what I dreamed about, it if was even a dream. It seemed like silent flashes of sky. It was as though I was a white bird flying with out noise or engines around the Earth. Bellow me I saw oceans, mountains and even cities. My dream self flew on and on until I came to face with my enemy. Or at least I'm assuming it was my enemy. For I felt much disdains and contempt for it was. I had a large black wings and red tail and flew faster than I could which made me fearful. I dived and rolled in my dream till I was so exhausted I could stay a head. Then like demon from the old stories it attacked and that is where I found my vision blurring in to the Hierlark crew room.

The room was almost as dark as the mountains themselves with lights off. Save for the runway and outer lights of the base it was just blackness in the base. Because of this I had no concept of what time of the day it was. I'd thought about getting up and perhaps finding water or something to help get me back to sleep. But I could not make a move like the chair I was awkwardly sitting ion willed me stay for a while. It was some minutes of my eyes scanning the dark that they became enough to notice the specter that had been awake all the while I was.

"Blaze?" I murmured softly into the darkness in case it was someone else.

I could his head turn to me revealing enough to know it indeed was him and then he returned to starring out the window on his left. I felt a diabolical combination of curiosity and anger then that compelled me to ask a question, "Have you even slept a minute since all of us fell asleep?"

He didn't move that time or even made any gestures that were visible to me until he began to speak. "Insomnia is said to a very common symptom of stress."

"Are _you_ stressed?" I asked almost making it sound like an outrageous joke. Then the explosions and flashes of the air battles came back. I then saw him. The body of his plane move nearly flawlessly. I saw his precisely timed missile and gun attacks. I heard his voice come back over the radio giving me cool calm command even when we were in the center of the dogfight. More and more it seemed greatly out of the question for him to even feel stress. Then simultaneously to the flashes of battle I saw him riding alone on his bike at the academy as he had done. I saw his focused mind furiously writing down notes for a composition that had entered his head. I then saw him vividly resent any attention for the more party type of cadets there. Then I felt ashamed for having those thoughts I felt it demeaned him. Then I thought of all I didn't know about him. His past his parents, his family, his old friend for childhood I never knew them. I felt so attached to part of him, but more and more of his mind I didn't know.

It felt as though I had come from a long journey when his words finally reached my ears. "I would've asked you that you're waking up only after few hours of sleep."

"Yeah, but at least I slept." His ghostly face turned toward mine and seemed to smile though I could not see his expression. He then continued whatever thought he had until I spoke again, "You seem preoccupied."

"I am. I can't help but think about the near future and the progression of this war. It's not going to be sort from I can see. Then again I'm not that high up." A moment passed and sighed with great burden that I then began to see warp around him like an unwanted serpent. His seemed to looking for a way around and obstacle, as through he was flying through a dog fight. "While all of you fell into your slumber high commanded wired a communication to his base. It was specifically addressed to me. It confirmed that am now in command of Wardog Squadron and will remain so as "they see fit." They were very deliberate in implying that we are going to be under watch. Alco it conveyed that there was another raid on the Western Coastline by enemy bombers. All of the planes in Sand Island were sent to intercept. None of them came back, Kei." It was numbing sensation of a narcaudic come over me. I couldn't really comprehend it; or rather I didn't want with all my heart to comprehend it. "Central command has also reported that we will be using the military power of the Arkbird to counteract the missiles that attacked the carriers. They apparently were sub-launched from a new super-submarine-carrier called Schinfaxi. And to top off all the surprises, we are directed to take all the pilots in this base, Hierlark, and take them to Sand Island. They are going to war."

I still sort of numb to what he was saying as I'm sure he felt similar, judging from his disposition. It was like my body's immune system was trying to protect me from my own anger and frustration. It soon passed I found that I had nothing to say in comment. "We should tell them," was all I could think to say.

"They already know."

I instantly felt surprised and incredibly stupid at the same time as a lamp was suddenly turned on to reveal the smirking face of Chopper, giving a most condescending grin at me. "Why to spoil to it, Captain. I was rather comfortable right there. I wish I could have seen your face, Nagase. You must have been the palest pilot in the air force. "

"Still better than you at flying," Blaze advocated for me.

"It's horrible." Grimm had seemed like he had just experienced a great loss. He starred at the floor much the same way Blaze was starring out the window. "I mean what's this going to accomplish, sending all these rookie pilots into flight they can barely kept their planes in the air."

"You did very well so I remember," Chopper said.

"Try to be indifferent to it Grimm, you can't go in the air with anxieties like that," said Blaze.

"But Sir… how can anyone just shrug it off…I mean just I can't stop thinking there all going to be shot down."

"I didn't say you can, just try to be. I don't want you to get shot down."

Grimm didn't argue he knew the truth to it and wouldn't dispute it. He looked like it was some unjust thing he had to do. His had an expression of anger and despair fight for supremacy. I'm unsure, but I think I suggested he stay angry if he had the choice. Anger, it may be destructive it may have been what caused that war, but it is in all truth the most healthy of emotions.

Chopper made suggestion that he and Grimm go wash down the new orders with something to eat, for I think all of us had Blaze's insomnia then. They both left me and Blaze alone. He continued what he was doing in the dark for sometime, the light making no difference in his facial expression. I stayed silent trying to imagine what his past was like, he didn't seem to have the personality that drove most to the military, and I was trying to deductively find out what that was, to no avail.

"God," I whispered after some moments had passed.

"God, indeed." I think I will never forget that. I used to think that he was affirming my use of it. Now, I'm not so sure.

It wasn't going to be an easy flight back to Sand Island, by saying easy I mean sort. The nuggets had barely gotten through basic flight and by result just had tenuous grasp of flying, much less mid air refueling. So had to land at every base along the way, which entailed taking detour off our flight path. While it was dangerous for them it was more stressing on us and especially Blaze. His command suddenly went from four planes to over two dozen, all of which he had to direct when landing. A few times we had to go on emergency fuel so all the nuggets could get their feet on the ground. By mid morning we were nearly at Sand Island, refueling at Mc'Neily Air Force Base while our planes.

At the base I found all of us staying out in the hangar near an old F-14 while the planes refueled and the trainees found some rest and relaxing in the crew room, which must have been impacted. I remember Blaze leaned on the fighter like defeated gladiator mortally wounded. Chopper did the same thing and then sank lower and lower till he was sitting on the ground near the intake. "Just think after this we can all go back t our usual duties back at base. Man this is just plain mean."

"We're almost at base surely we'll be allowed some rest when we get there," Grimm said.

"Maybe in your world yes Grimm. But on planet earth we are the dust in Perraut's eyes, the stink at his meals, and the thorn in his side. He's going to be so happy that were back he's going to double or shifts or give us latrine duty," Chopper lamented.

"You can get some rest here. I'm, taking them up again till they've all gotten some rest."

"That's best decision you've made, kid."

Walked beside Grimm and the Tomcat and followed Chopper's example shrinking to the ground and propping my head against the aircraft.

"If I could I would steal this F-14 fly over the Southern boarder to some tropical paradise where there are nice women and a beach to relax from this heat," Chopper said while zipping down his flight suit a bit. It was unusually hot for that time of year. After only a few minutes of landing Blaze's hair was jet black with seat. Chopper looked no better, and while they didn't really notice I was reeking from perspiration. Grimm was casting anxiously looks towards the Tower and the crew quarters which surely must have been air conditioned. This made us all give degrading remarks about the nuggets. "Damn it, we were just freezing our asses off only a little over four hour or six hours ago. And now we have to put with this."

"Stop complaining. I have enough worry complaints to deal with when we are in the air," Blaze talked low and seeming depression not bothering to pick his head up from the cool hull of the F-14 Tomcat. Chopper didn't argue or make a smart comment to him. The heat was weighing in on us. That combined with the heat must have made more docile, temporarily. We sat there like we didn't know each other, gazing like dazed zombies into the blurred area of the superheated runway. My mind became dazed rather quickly.

I found myself flying again, flying over great mountains of snow and ice. I could see cities built close together, thriving with life. There masses upon masses of people everywhere, overcrowding the streets and yelling loud chants as though they were in a grand celebration. I felt elated at that, joyous of all the splendor from the millions below, all inhabitants locked in the fabulous wave of grandeur. Soon I felt envious and I swooped a down to join in it, flying between the buildings. Closer and closer I went till I was almost in the celebration myself. I flew about them to their cheers, danced over them in great show and they all held out their hands in applause shouting brilliance at my display. I was completely consumed then, mixed with adrenalin and dopamine driving me to go lower and nearly touch them as I flew about spreading my glorious white wings before them and as I did so their cheers became ever the louder. I decided then to give them an insurmountable trick. A dive! I rose up high and proceed down arcing my wings high above my head for stability. I approached them fast cycling down and down until I heard it, a gun shot. I saw the bullet flying slowly from the pistol and fly straight into my heart as I was right above them.

My energy left me then as though it were rushed away by a flying fighter jet. I beat my wings as hard as I could and made it to the top of a small building collapsing immediately falling onto my hands and knees. I was in shock I didn't know why they shout why they attacked me. I looked over with my dying stregnthed at them and saw a different city. It was panicked place, so much so that they were nearly killing each other over escape. They all poured in a huge huddled mass to escape. the confinds of their own home. It was a celebration, it was fear. They were all reduced to their most primitive states. They were nothing but animals because death so much. I watched them till my dying eyes could not keep open. Laying on my back I starred into the beautiful sky and saw the fighter coming and large bomb carried beneath its wings. As I died I heard the massive exposion, and so silent it was.

After that dream I felt like I really was dead for moment. Eventually I became aware of someone saying "Mamm, mamm," over and over. Then there came a gentle for someone trying to wake me. I opened my eyes to find that I had fallen asleep on Grimm's soldier who was no sitting by me. He was blushing red with an extreme look of anxiety. "Sorry, Grimm," I said and he told me it was all right.

"That says something about the heat. It's the first I've ever every seen an officer fall asleep against an aircraft in a hangar," Chopper said.

"That's because you never spend time in the hangar," Blaze said.

"I'm not a natural mechanic like you are, Kid. I like to relax whenever possible. Hey you looked you pretty relaxed on his shoulder Nagase. Having some _naughty _dreams are we?"

"Shut up, Chopper."

"If she was you'd be the farthest person from them. You and that pop-music of yours," Blaze said.

"Fuck you, you think you'd have any better chance then me?'

"Well, from what I've observed against this fighter, is that Grimm has best chance of us three," as I scoffed at him for saying that Grimm look as though he had dropped something immensely valuable and failing to find anything to say. We exchange a few insult back and forth before we ran the subject to the ground. As we became more sullen and silent the heat seemed to grow with ever more power, and all of us four seemed to be dosing into a light sleep.

I was there for sometime, not really asleep or dreaming, but in a sort of daze while the world passed before my feet. I tried not to think of the strange dreams of the previous night or the daydream a few minutes before. I just focused on myself, lying against he plane, letting the perspiration run down my then drenched torso, listening to my breathing slow go slower and slower as I neared sleep. It was most serene moment, being one in the world with no war and no hate, but I soon remembered those sitting beside me and woke to find a young sergent talking to Blaze and handing him new orders.

As of that moment or mission to take the raw pilots to Sand Island for deployment and additional instruction became scrap. Yuktobania had entered Osean Air Space with a large air born invasion force, directed to capture the mass driver, and as it seems like a cliché then and now, we were to defend it from attack

**I hope this wasn't too boring. I just thought I'd try something a bit different.**

**-Stonehenge**


	8. White Bird: Part I

Fire

That mission…well, it was unexpected. It was October third, It started initially when we were returning from Hierlark, where we had refueled after the mission over the inland sea, when the first Schinfaxi attack happened, which as you know was terrible nightmare for us. Anyway we had spent the time resting in the crew room, when I was called in to the base commader's office. They had received a communication form High Command which told me that a raid on the Western Coastline bases and all the planes at Sand Island beside us were sent to intercept, and none of them back. Additionally they informed me of the upcoming involvement of the Arkbird to counteract the missile launch capabilities of the Schinfaxi, Yuktobania new sub-carrier, and that I was to take all the nuggets at Hierlark to Sand Island for immediate combat deployment. While I guess it wasn't form us going up in combat the idea sent images of scores of planes just falling from the sky, like what had happened on the last sortie over the inland sea.

You probably know their reactions to it, by needless to say none of us thought highly of it, still when had to take them. The duty of soldier, and a pilot, I guess is performing deeds you normally would object to.

Though it didn't take that long for our planes to be refueled it took hours for the nuggets to get prepared and checked for us to actually start flying toward Sand Island, which by means was a sort flight. None of them had flying very long or had any experience with mid air refueling so at every base that was near to our flight path we had to land and refuel. At some we were diverted to land at McNealy Air Force Base, and that's where I got the next sortie briefing.

Nagase I remember was drifting into and out of a nap, while Grimm and Chopper bickered of over this and that while we were resting from heat against one of the hangar planes, when I was give new orders putting Wardog under the Commander of the McNealy Base. His name was…Chase, if I remember right.

"I am Commander Chase of McNealy Air Base, this base," he had said to all of us when we had stepped into the briefing room, "all you have by now heard from you squadron leaders that Head Operations had put you under…_my_ command for the time being. Keep that well in mind while you're up there. That being well established, I will now brief you on the details of the is next sortie you will be taking part. This will be called operation "Silverbridge". You're all familiar with the Basset Space Center. Well they are finishing preparations to launch a laser cannon to be picked up by the Arkbird. In anticipation of this the Yukes have deployed large aerial force against the Center aiming at capturing it," some murmurs echoed through the room from the younger pilots but Nagase didn't even seem to be bother by them. "Now you will intercept and destroy these forces, giving support to our ground forces at the center. Understood everyone? And…by _my_ orders all un-trained pilots are bared from taking off and participating in this engagement. Those guys are still kids. And where is Wardog's flight lead?" He had fierce glance. I could feel it like a razor cut through the dimmed lights of the room to find me. "I knew Captain Bartlett during the last war. He was Osea's best pilot at the time, and because of that...Wardog… _his _squadron has always been one of the best, "Part of it all most sounded like a complement, "And now his squadron is headed up by none other a rookie! Barely earned your wings before you first saw combat. And you probably have the fewest flight hours of any other squadron leader here. Yet you performed magnificently over the past few weeks and are the most qualified pilot here according to Headquarters. You'll be the flight of this operation, because of that. Blaze is it?" I nodded lightly making sure not to look away, "Well, let's just say; right now…you better be magnificent out there. And if any of my pilots die you will never hear a nice word from me."

I suppose I was ready to rise up and fight fist to fist with him, instead I clutched the folder that had been handed to me earlier while he glared from atop his ego down at me. I think everyone else was looking at me too.

"You've all heard me, now get to it!"

I suppose he was a close friend of Bartlett's. You'd have to ask him about that. At the time I felt like he was right. I didn't really have the record to justify my leading of Wardog or all those squadrons that day. Maybe God wanted it that way or something, if he hasn't done enough.

"What was that about?' Nagase asked.

"Guess he doesn't like me."

"Guess, that guy was almost as bad you as Perrault's with us. Why do we always have these nut-job s for commanders anyway?" Chopper said.

"Watch what you say if he's anything like Perrault complaining only intensifies the situation," Grimm said.

"Right so let's just get into the air everyone."

Before long probably nearly five squadrons were in the air with us at their head. Despite Chase's harsh comments toward me, I didn't seem to have any problem with the other flight leads; at least none that were spoke over the radio. We only were some hundred miles from the Center and its mass driver, we were only in the air a few minutes before it and the Arkbird in low orbit over it was in site.

I had never seen the "White Bird," as Nagase called it, before then, not even in a photograph I had only scarcely heard Nagase talk about it when it was first launched and successfully completed an orbit around the world. It was huge from what I could tell, and beautiful. I saw why Nagase was so proud of it. What better to symbolize peace tan launching a mighty dove into the sky? The driver it self was built as a joint pact between Osea and Yuktobania. I was very ironic that we were then fighting over it.

"Ten minutes to launch."

"Is that the Arkbird? Grimm asked.

"Yeah, what else could it be? Hey isn't that thing supposed to work kinda' like a satellite? Why did it climb down all this way?" Chopper asked.

"It's a maneuverable orbiting spacecraft." Grimm answered.

"_I know that. _I'm just saying if that if that thing uses atmospheric fiction to change it orbit wouldn't that make it pretty hard to defend itself?"

"…I guess it'd be in trouble if someone started firing on it right now."

"Right! Shouldn't it be higher up then?"

The Arkbird…it was built towards fading dream of an international space station project. Something to unite the people of the world to explore the new frontier…it was meant top be. Yet, the ally that was supposed to make it a reality was sending occupation forces. The irony of it bother me, at least not as much as I noticed it bother Nagase.

It was about twelve hundred hours; midday and we were then reaching the air space "Wait! Halt the count down enemy invasion force spotted."

"What! Yuktobania is invading here!"

"Wardog and all available squadrons, a large Yuktobanian invasion force supported by a squadron of fighters intercept and destroy them."

"Sure thing…All right, this is Blaze all squadrons break off and engage enemy forces. Make sure none of the ACV's get near the mass driver." No, I didn't have any presidence for those orders, but I was expected to give them anyway. My heart was pounding not as much for myself, but all the other planes there.

"Well said Captain, you' really gave to 'me," Chopper commented.

"It will be all over if they get near the mass driver. Blaze do you think our force are sufficient?' Edge asked me as we passed over the coast to Basset.

"No, but we're going to have to leave that to the rest of the guys. Grimm, are you confident today?" I asked Archer.

"As much as I can be, Captain."

"Good. We have incoming, there's squadrons coming on to intercept us."

"Two squadrons!" Edge said.

"All right. Grimm, Chopper break off and engage."

"Loud and clear Captain, and don't worry Grimm as long I'm on your wing you'll get through this."

"That's not too re assuring," Grimm replied.

"Care full you too," Edge said as they broke off from formation. In the distance I could see the sun gleam off something polished, as a canopy is.

"This is Zaharada, engage and attain air superiority over the Center leave the facilities to our ground forces," It faint but I could tell from the tone it was a woman the first flight I would be going up against.

"You stay on tail as you said….Nagase?"

"Just focus on your targets and nothing will touch your six."

The battle again well this one went something like a chessboard I'd say. And I say it because I don't know how to play chess. That fight was I the knight attacking the queen, I couldn't quite follow her movements, but my maneuvering was something she hadn't seen from the Yuktobanian pilots she flew with, I suppose again. I was enough to hand me the victory.

"Zaharada, I come around and cover the number two."

"This is Zaharada; keep in sight of the number one. I don't think this is any rookie pilot from central Osea.

"Edge, break off now!" I shouted out an odd impulse in my spine. It was right though as soon as I did a missile which might have hit her instead. I rolled right and pulled up maybe stretching more than nine g's before the lights finally went cold.

"He dodged it! I'm goin' in close."

She was good. I heard the bullets pass by tall before I pulled away and flew close to the ground. I'm sure she followed but when I jerk right and up you lost sight, and I came around when she pulled up to get away from one of the launch towers. I was "He's on me turning to evade. Damn I cant' see him." She kept trying to get me to fall for a fake direction while rolled the other way then could about to kill me, unsuccessfully. I kept on her but I could lock and it was maybe another twenty seconds before I had good shot. The guns tore of her right wing and shattered the tall into nothing but the frame which broke off immediately. She went into and tried to eject. I saw the shoot leave as the other wing broke and pummel her and the parachute to the ground.

"That's a kill. Good job flight lead. You took out their Captain!"

"Zaharada's dead and I have no contact with her wingman."

"Blaze, the bandit's confirmed down. Nice shooting, Edge said coming back to my wing.

How did I feel? At the time elated. I had shot down an enemy flight commander, and disrupted the chain of command for all enemy planes causing them to break formation. Now I feel like murderer if ask now, and don't ask me that me again.

Well, one the squadron was down we flew back together with Chopper and Archer, who had both succeeded in shooting down their planes.

"Aw, you' should have seen it Captain, damn they'll think twice when they get back to Yuktobania for another sortie," Chopper had said.

"Great there still plenty of forces to take care of."

"Wardog leader…we have picked up multiple aircraft incoming on your position."

"Roger, let's form up and take care of them."

"I'm on your wing, Captain," Chopper said.

"Tally ho, I have them Blaze, four coming in on vector 270," Edge said.

"Confirmed, arm XMAR and fire."

"Roger Captain, arming XMAR…oh fuck," Grimm I think did take longest of us to "adjust" if that is what you want to call it. Flying takes a bit more than experience to adjust to it, especially in combat. Then again who is to say any of use were really used to it then.

"I got one. Fox 1! Oh sweet that sucker's not going home," Chopper screamed.

"I missed, he's targeting me," Grimm said.

"Grimm you have a missile, jink right!" edge yelled with a passion.

"Don't worry Archer, I have your back," I said. All right, all right, all right." He was dancing every which way just not as smooth as their Captain nearly was. I held my trigger finger till he started o pull away out of his spin, presumably to try and get some distance away from me. "Gothcha."

"Kid, just bagged one. Another one," Chopper yelled!

"Thanks Captain."

"I got 'em, I got 'em." An explosion and explosion fired from some twelve hundred meters away. "This is Edge the squadron is neutralized."

"Yea!"

"All right Wardog!"

"Dammit we just our air cover. We'll be annihilated like this!"

"Shit, is that squadron unbeatable?"

Did we feel? Did I feel? Not quite then. It was more just a building and building of confidence in myself and in Grimm, Chopper, and most importantly Nagase. But later…absolutely.

"This ground base defense. The enemy has breached pillbox 1 and 2. We're not going to be able to keep them away from the mass driver. We need air support now."

"This is the control tower to Wardog; Flight leader the ground base defense needs air support. Fly in and destroy the enemy ACV's."

"This is Blaze; we have not been equipped for air-surface combat. I'll direct another squadron to support," I replied to the new order.

"This is the control tower, negative Blaze. Your squadron is the only one proximal enough to engage in time. Do what you can till additional ground defense forces can be redeployed to the area. Wardog, we're counting on you." We'll that phrase did somewhat worry me when he said it, but it was the truth, all the other squadrons had expending their missile and guns shooting the air transports for the ACV's and we were the only ones who could have gotten their in time to stop them from getting in range of the mass driver. Did I know what to do? No. But I knew better than to tell my squadron that. But I would soon realize, as you should now realize that as a commander you often have to make decisions on matters you have never even thought about before.

"What does he expect us to do anyway? Scare them out their tanks?' Chopper remarked.

"What we can," I said. "All right everyone. Keep on each others wings and switch to guns. We're going in for an attack run on theses guys."

"I hear ya, Kid, but are you sure this is going to work." I didn't say anything.

"We'll be able to least damage the tanks, maybe even destroy them," Edge said.

"Enough chatter everyone. All right form up on my wing and puck a tank as we

go in."

"This is Archer, engaging."

"Chopper engaging."

"Edge engaging."

"This is Blaze engaging."

"Keep to right Grimm we don't have much room here to maneuver!"

"Sorry, Chopper, I guess I'm nervous."

"We'll its good to tell us that now!" Chopper screamed.

"Enemy ground formation in sight. You ready everyone?" I asked.

"Yes, Captain."

"Lead the way, Kid."

"Dammit, a squadron's incoming. We won't make to the mass driver everyone take cover."

"We can't retreat now there's nowhere to go!"

"COVER!"

When we opened fire the first tank in the line was shredded in a few seconds. We were close enough to where I could see one of tank crew's, I guess the commander, try to get out and run. The bullets put so many holes into him…his head flew off in red trail and the rest of him just fell apart as though he was torn rag doll.

"That's it." I said as pulled hard up and left to avoiding taking the driver ourselves.

"Great job Wardog the remaining enemy tanks are surrendering."

"We'll that' one victory for us I guess," Chopper said, but I didn't really hear him at the time. "Yo, kid. You still alive?"

"Yeah, I'm just hoping we don't get that job again."

The sun past midday I began its decent to the western water of Ceres, and some how it felt like my soul was going with it.

"Anyone got any contacts," Grimm asked.

"No my IFF is clean," Edge said.

"We'll it looks like we saved the day. I had no doubts. How about you kid?" Chopper asked.

"Some," I said.

"Oh, C'mon Captain. That's no way to support the squadron."

"The enemy has abandoned the assault. We've pushed them back!"

"Yeeeeeeeaah, I got my first enemy kill today," one Osean pilot said.

"That's nothing against Wardog," another said.

"Did you see them! I mean the lead and number two. The 016 and the 007. I think they took down the enemy flight lead."

"I won't doubt that for a second. That guy saved my ass back over the inland sea."

"Fame still, grows," Edge said to me and I'm certain she was smiling.

"Yours too, don't' forget."

"Yeah, but I'm not the Sand Island Squadron's flight lead."

"You should have been."

We were nearing the end of the operational time allotted by the fuel we had left in our planes which was mostly gone when the next wave came, worse than the first.

"Oh no. It looks they have abandoned the ground operation and have just decided to destroy the base. A large force of enemy fighters incoming, intercept and destroy."

"Dammit, we're so close to getting this thing launched."

"Just hurry everything up but makes sure everything checks."

"You don't need to tell me how to do my job."

"Large number of cruise missiles have been detecting heading toward the base intercept and destroy them."

"Fuck! Is this chit never going to end? I mean we have barely any fuel left to get back to McNealy base! Chopper complained.

"You said, we don't have much ammunition left either. How are we expected to stop these missiles?" Grim asked.

"I don't know just use everything you have left and disperse everyone." I looked at my IFF which showed incoming assault fighters but no missiles. Then I looked out and off the ocean, I saw two missle coming toward my position. "This is Blaze, all fighter fall back toward the mass driver keep it covered till the SSTO craft is launched."

"What, we don't have any fuel left," I heard one pilot say!

"It doesn't matter. You heard Wardog we all need to be there or the driver fucked for sure!"

"Check IFF the missiles should read as incoming bogies," the tower said.

"This is Edge I have two missiles on contact. Turning to engage."

"This is Grimm; I have two contacts I think they're missiles, engaging."

That was how it went. All of us, and by that I mean every fighter pilot up the deployed there and then went into complete over drive. I shot two of the missiles and another two showed up on my IFF and something for a moment. I saw it more clearly visually; it was hard to miss once I knew it was there.

"Edge, Archer, Chopper. Check your IFF for more cruise missiles."

"What? Blaze we shot them down?" Edge said.

"Just do it."

I wasn't sure they would notice it.

"Wait, the missile trajectories appeared out of nowhere." Grimm said.

"That's right I'm intercepting one right now," I said.

"You want us to split off and take of them?" Chopper asked.

"Exactly."

"Roger Captain. Think saw one of the bombers too. This is Archer I'm turning to engage."

"This is Edge I have one as well."

"Watch yourselves," I warned.

"And what 'bout you," Edge asked.

"I'm invincible," it was joke. Though it would have some great irony later on.

I it was slow intercepting the bomber. I suppose it picked me pick up as I was coming into missile range, but s soon as I could fire my XMAR missiles, the B-2 launched two at me. I jerked the down then went into a roll nearly crashing into the ocean as well. I soon recovered and then had the thing in perfect launch position. I launched and it the plane literally incinerated in mid-air, like the simplest leaving one's mind.

"Confirmed kill on a bomber. Those must be the craft responsible fore those cruise missiles."

"This is Blaze B-2 down. How are you guys fairing?"

"This is Edge, the bombers down. Look's like Grimm got his as well."

"Dammit, I can't find mine. It must hiding in higher altitude. Oh wait there it is. This is Chopper, engaging enemy bomber."

"This is launch control final checks complete, launch in 60 seconds."

"That's it have a safe trip."

"This Viper 11 we've sanitized the air space above the mass driver its all clear!"

"I'll admit I had my doubts about Blaze but he did better than our own commander," one fighter pilot said.

"Hey, don't let him hear that."

"If I could only fly like him I'd be an ace by now too," some pilot said.

"Seriously, the Wardog lead is an ACE!"

"Look's like it's all over," Nagase said as she rejoined my wing. "You've have everyone believing they can win this war."

"Yeah, but who knows? I could be shot down in the next few minutes," I said.

She paused moment then said unquestionably, "You won't."

"AAAHAH! I just bagged a bomber," Chopper said.

"Yeah but you nearly got a missile up your ass," Grimm said.

"You know what Grimm? I don't like your attitude."

"Hey you two, form up." Nagase said.

"There it goes."

That was one of the few inspiring days we had on the battlefield. The craft seemed to almost explode as the engines ignited and propelled it along the along the mass driver, up into t he cloud s to meet that angelic bird. Laser cannon ready to be used by a bird of peace for our counterattacked against the Schinfaxi. Well, this entire war was full of Irony.

"Blaze, you why know the Arkbird was built?"

"No."

"Well it sure wasn't made for this." I could hear sadness in her voice as she said. The bird then rose up and disappeared into the heavens, and we flew back to McNealy.

The sun was setting on everything then.

-I apologize ahead of time for any errors.

-Stonehenge.


	9. Front Line

Fire

The sky turned to twilight as the sun began to set on McNealy Air Force Base. Despite the victory, I felt as though the white bird of peace was setting with it, never to rise again. The war was getting worse. Yuktobania had deployed an air born strike force to capture the Basset Space Center and we had been diverted from our flight back to Sand Island to engage them. As the most experienced squadron, we led the allied squadrons from McNealy and elsewhere against them. My only relief about the mission was the Chase, the commander of McNealy, had the foresight to bar the nuggets from the assault. It would a repeat of what happened on Sand Island before the war began if that had been otherwise.

The goal of the mission, which was called operation Silverbridge, was to protect the SSTO spacecraft which was to launch off the mass driver at Basset to the Arkbird, the White Bird. We succeeded, allowing the launch to proceed unhindered by the enemy attack. And the White Bird rose above the sky, laser canon in its wings. It was a moving sight. Still, I couldn't help but feel sad. Why did it have to be sued in this War?

"C'mon Nagase you're thinking too much about this. It's just giving you and everyone else a headache," Chopper said on the way back to McNealy.

"She is right though," Grimm said and Chopper made low husk. "I mean the Arkbird was intended to be a unifying symbol for the world to rally around. Especially since what happened 15 years ago with Belka."

"And look how well it's worked at that. I mean look would you rather us not put the canon on the ship and just be outmatched in firepower against the Yukes? We need an ace in the hole just as much as they do, ya know?" Chopper had said.

"Yes but…what good is escalation going to do. What if this war ends up encompassing the entire world like the Belkan war did 15 years ago? Does anyone want another nuclear strike?" I said picturing the video of the massive fire-clouds that left nothing over the North Gate.

"Heh…it won't come to that. I don't even the old brass like our Emperor of a Base Commander can forget that," Chopper, and I felt a strong conviction in his words.

"Well even if it doesn't come to that. I don't want there to be Yuke stomping over Osea, anymore than I want to be stomping over Yuktobania. Hey…why did this war even begin in the first place?" asked Grimm.

A long silence set in as Grimm said those words. I felt I should know the answer, and felt dancing over my head but I couldn't just say it. The silence remained until Blaze finally said something.

"It's because Yuktobania attacked Osea, and then declared war without any diplomatic statement," Blaze said.

"Hey…that's right. Does anyone even remember there being anything on the news or something?" Chopper asked.

"There wasn't any. I don't have a lot of connections, but I know all the intelligence was trying to do right up to the moment the Yukes declared war was to determine the chain of command in Yuktobania. We don't even know if their Prime Minister is even still in charge of his own country," Blaze said.

"That explains the confusion when the Yukes attacked us at Sand Island as well," I said.

"Great, so it's almost like 15 years, that some right wing party takes control over the country and sets them into a worthless and costly war against people who really aren't enemies. It's always good to not to know why you're fighting," Chopper sarcastically remarked.

"Still however you slice it, we have to fight or we're going home in body bag," Grimm said.

"You said it."

The darkness set in and we finally came into range of McNealy at about 1830 hours. Despite the early time, we were exhausted from the combat in the sky and looked forward for the sort amount of "R&R" we would receive at McNealy before taking all the nuggets back to Sand Island.

"Wardog, we have you on radar. Good work out there today people. All panes may begin to land in sequence. Nice flying, Blaze." The controller of McNealy said as we approached the runway.

"Roger, controller. This is Wardog, beginning landing preparations," Blaze said.

"Finally. I think my foot is numb from all this flying," Chopper commented.

The landing took some time, considering we weren't the only squadron in the air as it was at Sand Island, but relatively it wasn't long before almost everyone was blowing off steam on way or another. The rookies were ecstatic when we arrived. As soon as we set foot on ground all of us were swarmed with the cadet, just like it had been at Hierlark. Everywhere there were shouts, cheers, screams and questions of how many planes were shot down, and I found myself rushing into the locker room, stepping in and locking the door behind me only to find that Grimm and Blaze had beaten me too it. "Look's like you got swarmed along with us," Grimm said.

"I just had to get away from the noise…and the questions, "I laughed slightly as I said that, "It's like we're celebrities."

"Yeah, and I guess that makes you the most famous pilot in the Osean air force right now. I saw bunch of pilots out there who weren't from Hierlark," Grimm said.

"It's because of that article by Genett." The Four Wings of Sand Island," that's why everyone knows about us," he said, "and speaking of us, where is Second Lieutenant Chopper?" We found him in the thickest crowd of nuggets, telling elaborate details on the all the engagement of the sortie, and Blaze himself had to get into it to fish him out.

That night the entire base of McNealy, the hard headed Chase not excluded, was celebrated the "thwarted invasion of Osea" as everyone cheered something to that extent. Everywhere, whether in the offices airmen popped open bottles of champagne, pulled out bootlegged kegs, and drank themselves beyond intoxication. Pilots, maintenance crew, or command officers it didn't matter, no matter what anybody there really thought of us or the war they celebrated the hard won victory and gave lively toasts to all the fallen soldiers and pilots. Because of that there really wasn't anywhere Chopper, Blaze, Grimm or I could go and not get asks to join someone in the frivolity, not that any of us would, even Blaze. At sometime in the main crew room which is where we found ourselves at around 2000 hours the loudest commotion stopped so they could announce the kills of the day and the running kill record for some of the pilots. We were a part of that 'some.'

"Attention. Everyone quiet down and shut up for a while as we announce all the Yuke bustard our pilots shot down today. First, Halo squadron which actually scored the nice number of five kills on enemy aircraft." And so it went. He proceeded to announce all the kills for the squadrons then the individual kills of every pilot. Because we weren't apart of the McNealy detachment, out names were the last ones on his list, which was actually good since it caused something of sensation. "All right and now our allies from the 108th Tactical Fighter Squadron, our as all you huts know them, as Wardog or 'The Four Wings of Sand Island.' Frost off their squadron has, confirmed by head operations, scored…" He stopped suddenly looking in disbelief at the paper then at us, as if it wasn't even possible. He began again just a little shaken. "The Sand Island Squadron has a confirmed forty-three kills." No one after was really paying any attention to him after that. All the eyes in the room were focused on us. I remember Grimm smiling nervously from all the attention, Chopper soaked it up like any sponge, and I think I was turning reder than the exhaust of the Hornet at max thrust. The only one of us that actually maintained composer was Blaze and that is just how he always is, cool under pressure.

"First off, Ensign Hans Grimm, call sign Archer has a confirmed eight enemy kills." Mutters of "shit and "you're fucking me" were heard throughout the room and probably around the base as well." Next, Second Lieutenant Alvin H. Davenport, or as we call him Chopper, has a confirmed nine kills. Wardog's number tow Second Lieutenant Kei Nagase, call sign Edge, has a confirmed twelve kills. And finally Wardog one, Second Lieutenant Blaze Arré, whose call sign is also Blaze, has a confirmed…fourteen kills." As he finished the mutters slowly came together like a gathering storm into a titanic cheer. It was moving scene. The four of us found ourselves in the center of an entire celebration, Captain Bartlett's nuggets. If only he had been there to complete the moment. "Well it looks like we have our first Ace Squadron of the war." And the crowd erupted again and then collapsed on us with everyone wanting to shake our hands.

After that began a long night of "congratulations" and shots to celebrate the occasion. I found myself standing in circle of airmen while Chopper next to me retold all the stories, only this putting more exaggeration and gestures into the mix. He moved from side to side swaying his weight as though it was the tide of battle. His hands alone became fighters and together the bombers we shot down on the raids against Sand Island. They banked, turned, rolled and fired missiles as the battles moved on and on, each battle becoming more impossible as he went on. It would have been quite ridiculous if their wasn't so much alcohol already in everyone. Each kill became a grand achievement awing everyone including me. For his stunning climax after he gone on for some time he told of Blaze's engagement with that enemy flight lead, Zahrada, and his hands twirled in loops and dives until one caught the invisible missile and incinerated into nothingness to a grand applause. Chopper bowed proudly and I looked for Blaze, but he had disappeared with Grimm and was off somewhere on the base.

Time passed and slowly but surely the party dies down and many people were carried off by their slightly more sober friends to the barracks or to quarters. I think we may had been issued some, but like at Hierlark we found ourselves all sitting where the center of the party had been, the crew room. We joked and laughed at the events that unfolded, Chopper boasted very excitedly over how he had kept the audience for a third time even with the presence of loud music and ûber amounts of beer.

"I'm tellin' yah that was great. If they remember any thing in the morning, it'll be how unstoppable we are as pilots. Kid, they probably have elevated you way beyond even an ace status now," Chopper said.

"Unless they figured out that you were exaggerating."

"You know what Grimm, I don't like your attitude," Chopper replied.

"I just hope this doesn't happen every time we come back from sortie. You do know we have to fill out mission reports when we come back, right?" Blaze said.

"Well, you will definitely, I think I might be able to get by with havin' to," Chopper replied. "Besides, those things aren't works of art. You just put the bland fats in subject verb format and you're done."

"Let's just hope we keep that attitude as the war goes on. It doesn't look like it's going to end anytime soon," I said.

"No kidding," Grimm said.

"Yeah that's right. Since we're all partially drunk and talkin' about it, this war is basically the worst you could ask for this day and age," Chopper put his feet onto the table we sat at putting his hands into the air while starring at the ceiling. "Osea and Yuktobania, it's the world's two superpowers going at it after these years of supposed peace!" His last word sounded very satirical.

"And with all the new technology the Yuke's have…it's even worse than fifteen years ago with the Belkan War," Grimm said.

"We'll just have to be careful then," Blaze said.

"Careful, I think that's an understatement of what we'll have to be. You all remember what happened to our carriers. The Kestrel is the only one left," Chopper said.

There was some silence after that. My mind flashed for moment of the dream I had and that bomb destroying everything. Then I saw the sea again and that steel rain tearing everything in sight; St. Hewlett with all those people; and a sadness deep and dark came over my thoughts.

"Scinfaxi." The word woke me out of my small daydream, or night dream since it was in the very early morning.

"What was that Kid?" Chopper asked.

"That was the name of that underwater carrier. They told us, I just didn't really listen to them at the time. I saw the launch, those three missiles. I'll be very honest with you guy's now I really wanted, and still want, to blow that thing out of the water," Blaze didn't look up as he said that almost as though he was ashamed of what he was saying.

"So do me, Kid. After witnessing that kind of carnage, anyone would hate those people. Even if it really wasn't their fault," Chopper said.

"I think do too, hate them I mean," Grimm said quietly. The word seemed to pierce into me as we talked about it.

Hate. It was such a word that it sent invisible shivers down my spine every time it was spoken, whether by me or anyone else. Maybe it was some motherly instinct or an imprint from my parents, but I almost wanted to scold them for speaking like that, before I realized that I shared their hatred of that sub-carrier, that monster, that demon from the sea. It was a begging of a realization that I would have throughout the campaign against Yuktobania.

"Well let's not dwell in revenge, I thin that would be the worst thing to be thinking off when we flew up there. I want all to agree. Whatever happens out in that wide open sky? Whatever mission or sortie we go off on. Whatever enemy we go up against, ace, submarines or even an entire enemy air division the first thing we think about is each other. Us as a team, Wardog, The Sand Island squadron we will survive! That is the only rule we have when we are up in the sky," Blaze said that softly, but passionately, like there was some amorphous power in him.

"Fuck yeah, Kid! That is what I want my Captain to say," Chopper praised.

"Inspiring, Blaze," I said.

"If we think that way we all might make it through this war," Grimm said and what we had in our hands became reason enough toast with. I only wish it had all some true.

It was moment before we noticed that we weren't alone in that room. He came up behind me and Grimm while Blaze gave his first real pep talk as a flight lead. And Chopper noticed him as he was giving a chugged of his margarita.

Choking on the drink he shot to attention and said forcefully. "Base Commander in room!" And without any word or second thought we were all standing at attention hoping not be reprimanded.

"It took you lone enough. At ease flight lead. You earned your pay today Wardog one, and so did every member of you're squadron. It not easy to become an ace, that's because it's hard to shoot down an enemy plane, yet early war we have an entire squadron of aces. I wonder how? Is it just chance or have you all blessed by the Goddess of War?" He asked eyeing all of us closely. If he only knew he was somewhat right, it was because we had the top aces of Osea and Belka training us. "Well, if you're worried why I'm here it's to personally congratulate all four of you for outstanding achievement above and beyond the call of duty defending an entire base by yourselves. I'm also here to tell you, your planes, and the nugget's planes are refuels and fitted to fly back to Sand Island. You'll be leaving in about a half hour so suit up and get them prepared. And to you Blaze, It look's like you finally understanding what air combat is about since you've already been an ace for awhile. Be careful people, dismissed," he said! And we were all of the lockers after we rounded up the nuggets to get ready for the flight despite the early morning.

"Hear that, Kid. You got some of the top brass even respecting you. Let's just hope you get warm to that old Emperor back at the base," Chopper had said, and I shared the same feeling then as well. From that moment on we felt as though nothing could stop us, not as long as we four flew.

It took some time to get all the nuggets through take off, checks. It seemed every one of them was making mistakes as they went down the list. Blaze didn't seem to mind, Chopper on the other hand screamed like hell at them, telling them that if they don't get them down, "the enemy was going to eat them alive." That put of few of them into gear, but they were no fresher than when we had picked them up at Hierlark, which was my biggest regret considering what they and we went through soon after.

We were air born with all the nuggets flying straight by the time the sun was rising, and already near to Cape Landers, a sort jump to Sand Island. It was the first time the nuggets or even we had seen the sun like that. For that moment all their anxiety about what was coming for them melted in the beauty of the morning. I was very glad they saw it considering…

"Sand Island, this is Wardog requesting landing clearance," Blaze said.

"Roger Wardog, landing clearance is granted. Welcome back."

We set again through the arduous motion as of getting the nuggets on the ground. It surprisingly went much better than any of the previous bases we had to land at, despite the fact that many of the rookies were exhausted from little rest.

We landed lastly, and Pops met us when we stepped out of our planes. "Well, it's good to have one of our few squadrons' back. The best one, I might add." He gave Grimm an assuring shake on the4 back before coming over to Blaze and I. "We had a bit of trouble why you guy are gone."

"Really? What was it?" I asked.

"Well, Yuktobania had been deploying a high number of reckon air craft on the Osean border. Especially around and near this base. It's just a little unnerving ya know. I'll tell ya, the commander was cursing that you guys were redirected to that attack on the Basset Center."

"Well you can tell him we not too happy about that either," Chopper said.

"I'll pass on that. Anyway I also heard some chatter from some of the junior officers about some intelligence hinting that the Yukes were putting together a large invasion force, a large support and amphibious landing fleet. Whatever the Yukes are actually planning it looks to include an invasion of this base," Pop's said.

"Beautiful. More work for us and it even isn't that far into this damn thing. Aw Dammit. I'm going to some breakfast," Chopper said.

"Wait! Wait Lieutenant I'll join you," Grimm yelled, scurrying down from his aircraft.

Pops just chuckled at this. "Well form the news you did a hell of job leading the air forces up their," he said to Blaze.

"I wouldn't say that."

"C'mon, why don't we go talk about it. I want to hear all the details," Pop's said.

"All right, I'll join you once we get un-suited," Blaze said.

"I'll be waiting in Hangar A. I'll assume you'll; be coming too Nagase?'

"Yeah. I'll be along with Blaze."

No sooner than a moment after I replied to him, Hamilton called out to us. "Wardog…Blaze doesn't even bother changing out."

"If I may ask why, sir," Blaze replied slowly.

"Just report to the briefing room ASAP, we have situation," Hamilton aid and walked off.

"Well, this is a time when you hate being right," Pops said.

"You think it has something to do with the intelligence you mentioned?" I asked.

"Absolutely, why else would they call you up after two consecutive missions?"

We arrived in the briefing a few moments after that still suited for flying. Chopper and Grimm were already there, and Chopper was ranting over how he had no time to relax. I was tempted to openly agree with him. Also there were some of the nuggets we brought to Sand Island from the Hierlark Base, which had me worried. They were still too green in my and probably all of our eyes to flying sortie. Chase at McNealy had refused to allow them to take off because of that, yet they were there waiting to receive the details on the emergency sortie, their first sortie that would be some of their last. They were visibly nervous none of them said much of nothing even when harassed to do so by Chopper. I just hoped we'd be able to cover them up there. Also there were the ground security forces commanders, and Air Defense Force Special Operations Captain, guy's who specialized in ground combat which gave us confirmation of what was happening.

A few minutes after we arrived, Captain Hamilton and Colonel Perrault came in the room activating the combat mission projector at the head of the room. He turned square to us and said, "You people are like you know that? The moment you return to San Island, this happens."

Hamilton continued the briefing from there, "A large combined force of Yuktobanian vessels and aircraft has been detected advancing toward Sand Island from the West. Our intelligence has confirmed the presence of amphibious assault craft within the enemy fleet. We believe the objective of this combined force is to land and capture this base. Ergo, your mission is intercepting the oncoming invasion fleet and suppressing any naval gunfire aimed at our forces ashore."

Perrault continued then, this will be called operation Vanguard and it is to be commenced as soon as all craft are air born. Even if this turns into a ground war, I am prepared to fight for this Island to the bitter end. As my advanced guard I want you to forget everything else and concentrate on dealing lethal blow to the enemy invasion fleet. We'll be deploying everything we've got. Launch all aircraft capable of anti-ship combat regardless of combat experience. Now that's all people. And I don't want to hear that we will have to abandon this base. I wish you best of luck in battle now launch!"

He was serious about all of it. Every plane we had was fitted with anti-ship LASM. Some had to be modified on the spot in order to carry the missiles, including ours. Our primary was as an air superiority squadron, not a naval attack wing but still we were going up for battle.

"All right this is Blaze; all checks are clean and requesting clearance for take off."

"Take off clearance granted. Blaze, protect our trainees up there."

"Wilco."

We had very large force consisting of over nine squadrons including Wardog, but several of them were comprised solely of rookie pilots. To help off set this, we packed as many of them as we could into one squad, hoping maybe if they acted as a wing they might get through this through strength of their numbers. As for us we received no new pilots, just us four, Grimm, Chopper, Blaze and I and even then we knew most of the fighters were going to be our problem. Our only good news was that we would be receiving AWACS Thunderhead for support during the mission, which wasn't very good at all.

"Aw damn, .my altimeter is off set again! How many times did I tell you guys it got bugged up on the way back to Sand Island?" Chopper complained. More problems that that came up and is over 0830 hours when we finally were all up in the sky.

"This is AWACS Thunderhead. All units listen carefully."

"Aw, I missed that sweet voice. Say you get hat from ya mama's side of the family?" Chopper asked.

"Cut the chatter. Bogies coming in at 280. You are cleared to engage on sight."

"Sure thing. All right gang, get ready we'll be in range in only a moment."

"It's too dangerous to bring the nuggets here," I said off point.

"I'm with ay on that," Chopper said. "You agree kid?"

"I think these guys still need training."

"Seriously they have their hands full just keeping their panes in the air."

"Still we wouldn't be able to defend Sand Island on our own out here against a force of this size," Grimm said.

"And that's make it all the better for them to be out here too? Man this isn't going to go well," Chopper said. I looked back through the canopy at all of them; most of them flying F-18's or 16's which flew awkward with the heavy LASM Missiles. Some of them had to continually correct their flight trajectories, and radio was full of nervous chatter.

"Finally a real battle. I'm getting nervous."

"Beamer, your plane's wavering!"

We caught sight of the enemy fleet only a moment latter. In the process of launching more amphibious forces than the missile we carried.

"All right. This is Blaze; enemy amphibious force cited turning to engage."

"Okay, here we go!"

We rolled right and pulled our altitude down to a few hundred feet above the water gain the advantage of the poor radar visibility, making it harder for the SAMS on the supporting ships to lock on to us. We arrayed our selves in a wing, heading to flank the landing craft.

"All right gang we got landing frigates at twelve 'o clock. Lock on LASM's," Blaze said.

"I hear ya, Kid. And I got tone. Fox 1!" Chopper and Blaze both fired missile's leaving a white trail as they fly and struck the side of one of the frigates. And my heart leaped a beat of jot when they struck.

"That's a hit! All right let's take these bastards," Chopper said.

"Calm down there's plenty more. All right gang, go light 'em up," Blaze said.

And with those words we began, a huge swarm of wasps descending on the enemy fleet. In some ways we really were like the plague, to the enemy at least.

I came one small landing ship that was about to launch to hover craft toward our base. And let loose the second of the four LASM missiles, even show I felt the force as my plane rose up suddenly form the sudden release of weight. Blaze fired one also, at one of the distant anti-aircraft boats that were firing at one of the nugget squadron's, Rapier's I think, sending each one of the gunners to hell. It was his second missile firing two but I saw no sudden jerk like my plane hand, as though he instinctively knew how to compensate for the loss of weight. I didn't have much time to think about it as an AA Gun stared firing at me no sooner than three seconds after.

"All right! Enemy ship sunk, Captain!" Grim shouted in triumph.

"Great Grimm, just cover Chopper."

"You know Blaze; I don't like your attitude."

A radio transmission came in from Thunderhead, "Wardog, and enemy destroyer force has begun firing long range artillery and missiles at Sand Island. Engage and destroy these ships."

"Roger AWACS," Blaze said.

"Be advised, there are Aegis ships near the center of them."

"Understood." Blaze said with a sigh. "All right form up gang."

"Aegis ships? Those are going to be a major pain in the ass," Chopper said.

"How are we going in, Captain?" Grimm asked.

"We'll flank them at low altitude and take out the aegis ships first. We'll need some additional fire power for this," Blaze said

"You're going to…" I started to say, but I stopped myself form questioning him. They were the only other squadrons in the air; even if they lacked the combat know how.

"Wizard, you guys still there?" Blaze asked.

"This is Wizard; yeah all of us are still here. We took some shrapnel from SAM on one of the frigates but we're all right and ready to go Wardog One," one of the rookie light leads said.

"Roger follows us at low altitude to the destroyer's. We'll fly to draw fire from and eliminate the Aegis ships, while your team attacks the destroyers," our flight leader said.

"Understood, Blaze. You guys hear that! Let's go bust some as!"

"We have to keep up with THEM! They're all aces!" one of his squadron members said.

"Hey, shut up Nav! We should count ourselves lucky!"

"At least that one sounds a bit more able," Grimm said.

"Yeah let's just see how his squad holds up," Chopper replied.

Wizard? He was one of the rookies that were sent in as recruited flight lead for one of the new squadrons. He was good, form what we saw that battle and few others. I hope he made it to the end of the war. Perhaps he even became an ace like we are.

"All right coming into range I have Aegis ships and destroyers in sight." I said, "Readying anti-ship missiles for firing."

"Wizard, you with us? Blaze asked.

"Yeah, we have them in sight ready to commence attack."

"I have tone fi…."

Wait, Captain, there's something up with that Aegis ship!" Grimm shouted.

I didn't notice it at first. I thought, as did all of us save Grimm, that it was just a standard missile launch plat form. It wasn't still we were in close that we noticed the additional appendage on it that was pointing toward us. It only lasted second but it was enough to send us all up into the air. A laser erupted from the appendage and swung down toward us, passing right over my canopy neatly slicing my udders form my plane.

"WHAT THE FUCK!" Chopper cursed.

"ALL AIR CRAFT RAISE ALTIUDE! CLIMB! Blaze sound fanatically, much of character.

All of use pulled harder than we've ever had in the surprise of the attack, climbing to about tow thousand feet. Before we got a bearing on what was happening.

"What the hell!" I shouted. "What was that?"

"All aircraft be advised, Aegis cruisers are equipped with rail-way arterially. I repeat. Aegis cruisers have rail cannons! Everyone climb to high altitude and evade!" Blaze shouted.

"This is Thunderhead. Blaze, what are you thinking! The nuggets will be in range of anti-air missiles!"

"They'll be chopped to pieces if the fail in range of those rail guns at low altitude," Blaze responded.

"This is Wizard, Drummle was hit but he bailed out. He needs a combat pick up."

"This is AWACS. The area's too hot Wizard. We'll have to wait to send a chopper in."

"Dammit this is not what need right now!" Chopper said.

"You said it, how are we expected to dodge those things?" Grimm said.

"We'll have to sink those ships if we want to even get close to rest of the fleet," I said nervously as I pulled up away from another rail blast.

"If we fly in that low they'll target us before we have a chance to even get a lock. Dammit!" Chopper shouted, also narrowly avoiding one of the rail blasts.

"We'll what else do you expect us to do!" Wizard shouted.

"He's right," Blaze said.

"C'mon Kid! it'llbesuicide! If we go down there they'll blow us away!" Chopper returned.

"I'll do it then! You guys give me some support firing from range," Blaze said.

"Hey Kid, I wasn't serious. AH," Chopper shouted as Blaze took off for high altitude above the fleet.

"What's he doing? He'll be in range of SAM's and the rail way artillery attacking from that altitude!" Wizard said.

"We'll let's give him some support then! You heard him!" Chopper shouted at Wizard.

We flew down the same low air corridor we came to attack the ships previously this time expecting a full barrage of rail fire. Wizard's team chattered fanatically even more than Chopper normally does. One even sounded like he was breaking down. "Watch for rail blasts," I thought about ten times as we ingressed slowly, but my real attention was watching the sky, looking for Blaze. A moment passed and he still didn't appear. And now radio chatter was heard from him. "Maybe he went silence," I told myself with heart skipping with the great fear that he had been shot down.

A few more dreadful moments passed and like a demon form the old stories one of the rail cannons fired in our direction. "BREAK! BREAK!" Wizard yelled, but most of his squad was too awed to move the stick in any direction. The beam missed but it fired again and this time headed toward Grimm's plane. "AHHH," he yelled and tired to pull up but it was too late. Moments before it sliced through his cockpit it disappeared. An explosion rocked the water as the first Aegis cruiser erupted in flames with Blaze's plane coming form behind the cloud unscathed.

"YES!" Wizard yelled, along with everyone else in our small attack wing.

I was more relieved than I can ever remember. For moment, an extremely arduous and long moment, I had thought I had lost another flight lead. Seeing Blaze rise from the water, rise from the flames, triumphant with no marks on his plane, all my doubts of disappeared. I suddenly found myself being the flight lead.

"Grimm, Chopper hit the throttle. We have to the final blow on those Aegis ships!" I ordered almost without thought. "Wizard, take your squad and destroy those vessels firing at Sand Island!"

"Roger Lieutenant. Let's rock boys! It's time to show what we're made of!"

"All right I got the next Aegis ship in sight! Fox 1!" Chopper yelled. His missile left the wing and sent the command deck in to chaos. I fired all of our anti-ship missiles and the Aegis ships were gone.

"HAHA! This is Wizard, enemy vessels are sunk! We skurred them!"

"This is Wardog 1, all rail-way artillery is neutralized and Aegis ships are sunk." Blaze flew up to my side and we flew out with Grimm and Chopper, along with Wizard's team to engage the rest of the ships.

"Roger Wardog 1. Continue engaging enemy support fleet."

"That was insane Kid! " Chopper said. "You took down each of those canons."

"Just to show you how good an ace he is," Grimm said.

"Yeah well," Blaze began, "We still have a jog to do."

"Aw right! That what's I want to hear form you Captain.

The adrenalin pumped and all the success almost robbed of our alert senses. I almost missed it as we flew, but as went toward the rest of the ships positioned closure to shore, in a corner of my eye a missile launched from bellow the water. "Missile fired from enemy sub."

"What!" Grimm said in disbelief, probably thinking of mission over the inland sea.

"Get out there Grimm. You nuggets too!"

"Climb, climb, c'mon," Chopper ushered, "C'mon! EVERYONE! Get you altitude above 5,000 feet."

"Incoming missile detected believed to be burst missile with multiple warheads that separate mind air…Wait, We're getting a command override from somewhere, 'Data linked to A-Sat targeting system.' What is this?" He went silent for a moment. Most of the nuggets still hadn't made 5,000 feet. Even I had just made it.

"Now it's counting down by itself. 9…8…7…"

"Dammit! They're not going to make!" Grimm shouted.

"4…3…2…1."

I nearly closed my eyes so as not to watch. What the blinding massive explosion I looked for bellow didn't happen. There was quick flash and the sky light up for a moment. I was numb for moment then I remembered and knew what it was.

"What was that light?" Someone asked.

"Kid, did you see that!"

"Yeah I saw it!"

"Was that the Arkbird?" I finally asked.

"Missile vaporized form orbit altitude! It's that Arkbird! We have the Arkbird! All units continue engaging the enemy!"

"Well Blaze it looks like we may have good fortune today," I said, almost not believing it myself.

"We might actually turn the tide of battle. We need to put another hard hit to this fleet or Sand Island will be overrun." Blaze said.

"Yeah Kid, but we're sort on weapons there are still a good number of ships left," Chopper said. "Hey and if the enemy wins here what happens to us?"

"We'll have to make sure that doesn't happen," Grimm said.

"Easier said than done, Grimm!" Chopper returned.

"Wizard, Lynx report you status," Blaze commanded.

"This is Wizard, we took some flak from some Yuke destroyers but we're all right."

"This is Lynx; we're right above you Blaze awaiting orders."

"This is Wardog 1; all aircraft focus your fire on the landing ships. Cut down the number that makes it to Sand Island!"

"Roger, you hear that boys! We're going in again!"

"You know Wizard we have barely any LASM's left. What damage do you think we'll do?"

"You know Nav, just stick to my wing!" Nav said while maneuvering down to join Wizard.

"This is Lynx, roger Wardog 1 we'll take 'em out."

I increased the throttle a small bit and joined Blaze's wing again, Chopper and Grimm followed suit and we got a grand look at the enemy fleet with a true monster waiting beneath. They were spread out but st5ill sizable, enough to still over run Sand Island withy gunfire and landing forces. Their chatter was panicked.

And the Scinfaxi was out there. "This is the anti-sub patrol plane Blue Hound. Submarine detected via sonobuoy. Sound pattern analysis matches that of the Scinfaxi."

"Roger. Thunderhead to Arkbird, we'll send the data to you as soon as we detect the missile."

That wasn't the only threat out there. He enemy carriers recovered from the initial damage we dealt them and launched sizable fighter squadrons against us that were moving toward Lynx's team.

Still there was the Scinfaxi. "Missile fired from enemy sub." Blue Hound reported.

"Roger begin data link."

"Ignore it we have to give Lynx cover."

"I hear yah, Kid. Well let's go Grimm their not going to wait for us."

"All right Wardog. Let's pull em up high and fast, and keep them away from Wizard and Lynx. Let's mop em quick!" Blaze said sounding a lot like Bartlett.

"Edge here. Roger Captain I'm on your wing."

"How romantic. Let's just hurry." Chopper said.

We accelerating to nearly mach 1.3, closing in on Lynx's position. Now, for nugget especially, Lynx was good. He had real talent that allowed him to read the tide of battle faster than most experienced pilots, and he was lucky enough for any of his guesses to come out right. He was very close to how Blaze was, with keen and fiercely penetrating eyes, but still no one really compares to our ace. We came upon Lynx's squadron quickly and found that he had broken formation when they were jumped by for bandits. They were having their own little dogfight over the enemy ships.

"Wardog 1 to Lynx, we'll take those guys off your hands."

"This is Lynx. It's about time Blaze, we've already two of our planes. They jumped us at five thousand feet."

"Get down to lower altitude. We'll take 'em on," I said just as Lynx was getting his squadron back together.

"Already leaving Wardog 2."

The eight of them joined in a loose formation and flew down toward the heart of the invasion fleet. "Break off. These guys are their aces. We'll have to engage them as a formation," the enemy said, joining together in tight wing and came at us.

"This Blaze, things are nice and even let's even. Let's take 'em on one to one."

"Roger, Kid. I have my sights set on the lead plane."

We broke off, and flew at different angels toward them. They kept the wing at first trying to get a lock on Blazes tail, and soon came to realize it wasn't going to work. Additionally Chopper and Grimm came up from behind, nearly getting weapons lock on two of them. Those two broke off, leaving two still after Blaze. I came on one of them from five a clock just out of his blind spot, and got missile lock on him right before he realized I was there. "Fox'2." The sidewinder struck him as he tried to evade. "Bandit down." The other broke left away from and right as he did gunfire tore through his plane and it incinerated in bright burst of flame. "Very impressive, Captain."

"Finally, we've been waiting for you two to stop playing with them," Chopper said.

"Bandits down Captain." Grimm said.

"All right gang. Seems if we have the Arkbird on your side we might still win this engagement, Edge."

"Yeah…let's hope our luck holds out. My stomach tightened as I said that, almost as an omen. It was like a dark shadow form my dream had came over us, that black raven winged bird from the depths of my mind. But all the while I felt afraid, my heart filled with rage.

"Oh no! They're firing more missiles! Number 3! Number 4! Number5!" Blue Hound yelled.

"There's two many!"

"This is AWACS, all aircraft fly above five thousand feet!"

"You heard that that nuggets Climb!" All of us yelled.

"This is Lynx, roger."

"This is Wizard, we're almost there. C'mon Nav! We're not waiting for you!"

"Ten seconds toe missile impact. 9…8…7…6."

Panic….The Arkbird destroyed the first missile incoming but still left two coming down on us in close proxi9mity to one another. They hit with and explosion that shook and canopy and a blinding flash from bellow. All accompanied by silence of many voices on the radio.

"Dammit, all aircraft maintain safe altitude," Blaze aid in frustration. "AWACS we can't engage the fleet like this!"

"We don't have any choice. Just weave through the missiles and continue battle."

"Oh yeah! 'Just weave through the missiles'. Whatareyounuts!"

"Blue Hound this is Arkbird. Requesting sonobuoy data-link." A foreign voice said over the radio.

"Stand by. We're launching a new sonobuoy."

"A sonobuoy data…are they planning to…" Blaze said, unsurely.

"What? What are you saying, Kid!"

"Blue Hound this is Arkbird. Is that sonobuoy data available yet!"

"Roger, we're sending it now. What are you going to do?"

"Countdown to firing…8…7…6…5...4...3…2…1."

Another laser came down, this time into the ocean.

"Explosion in the water! It damaged the submerge Scinfaxi. Picking up sound of main ballast bellow. The Scinfaxi's surfacing!" Blue Hound exclaimed.

The empty ocean where the laser had entered suddenly exploded in huge cloud of white foam. And launched a massive cylinder falling onto the water in violent splash. We starred down at in disbelief. The ship wasn't on any of our identification charts we'd received from high command. Nor did we have any idea of how large it actually was. It floated on the water like some great whale from a children's fairy tell, like the Razgriz in the North Sea.

"It looks like it had launched diving ability. It's floating like a cork. All units commence attack!"

"All right, this is Wardog Leader all units it time to time to get some payback. Focus all remaining anti ship LASM's on the Scinfaxi. All other aircraft give cover as they approach. The enemy is launching enemy fighters up to engage us." Blaze ordered, and all of us descended as a swarm of bees on the ship.

"All right, Chopper Edge, Archer. I'll you cover you as you go in."

"Taking the back seat Captain. I thought better of you," Chopper said.

"We won't let down." Grimm claimed.

"I'll lead 'em in Blaze," I said.

"Roger, make you guys sink it."

A transmission came in suddenly, "Ah damn, this is Wizard. That sub has a very intense anti-air defense. We'll try to keep it off you Wardog as you approach."

"This is Edge, roger Wizard. We're hading in now."

"Shit….this is Lynx. Enemy air craft are engaging us. All most in range!"

"This is Wardog Leader. I'll keep them off you, Lynx. Follow Edge to attack the Scinfaxi."

Lynx formed a second wing behind us as we came into range. "This is Edge, locked on LASM and fire." As soon as I gave the order the Scinfaxi's gunners found us as well, and what seemed like an ocean of bullets came at us. All of us got off one at least. Most got destroyed in the phalanx fire but a few hit their mark and hit the sub, and it all seemed to fill my rage. The Arkbird followed us though and hit the Scinfaxi with its laser cannon and the flames thriving on the steel hull of the beast grew to massive height and felt an odd relief. That sub was such a monster in my mind, so much so I forgot the men inside it. After the missile hit I came in around arming my last LASM and fired, finalizing its destruction. And the sea monster sank beneath the waves.

"YEEESSS. We did it!" Chopper yelled, and the sounds of triumph filled our hearts.

"This is Blaze; I shot down the enemy aircraft. Report."

I breathed deeply and slowly, watching the wreckage bellow. "This is Edge, we destroyed the Scinfaxi."

"Finally, the tide of battle is going in our favor. That steel rain is finally gone." Grimm said.

"We've received a sitrep from Sand Island Base Defense. They've thrown back the invasion force, and the remaining enemy fleet is pulling back. Nice job Wardog."

We would hear those words a lot.

**Please tell of any errors. **


	10. An Interlude

Fire

"Blaze, you did it!"

It was a grand feeling. Well at least that's what it felt like.

I was flying only a few hundred feet over the ocean water some ten miles of Sand Island, and starring down at the sunken Scinfaxi. That ship along had destroyed three of our carriers and shot down dozens of our aircraft, including many nuggets who had just joined my squadron. And we had destroyed it, and I admit I felt great sweetness of satisfaction as I saw that vessel exploded in a massive back cloud. It was a devastating weapon. I felt at ease that it never was gong to fire those missiles ever again. Looking back I can't feel as proud as I did at that moment. Maybe it's because of all that happened afterward. Maybe it was because of what caused the creation of that real demon.

When the Scinfaxi went down the remaining Yuke ships lost most hope they had at taking Sand Island. I ordered everyone to higher altitude to deal with the support fighters that the Scinfaxi had deployed. Even without their carrier they still stubbornly fought on. The force's momentum had been broken and the Base Defense had pushed back the amphibious assault, which withdrew back to the support vessels once the Scinfaxi was destroyed. I felt the greatest relief in a long time when the area was finally "sanitized" and the picture clean. The Four Wings of Sand Island, lacking sleep and a meal, a captain and experience had fought off an invasion and all we wanted was time off. It would to have to wait.

Despite the victory, we were far worse than when we started. Casualties numbered in the thousands, most of these were felt base the ground crews and gunners who had hard bombardment from the Yuke destroyers. We had also a confirmed twelve pilots KIA and several more were wounded when shot down; for of them it was their first time in actually combat. It made me wonder where all the aces of the past war had gone; why were we alone?

Damage to base was extreme, the harbor dock and loading facilities were unrecognizable. Flying over all we could make out were several toppled cranes, damaged walls, and debris everywhere. Three of the hangars had been hit by ship-launched cruise missiles. While there structure was intact inside all you could was a floor back with ash that was once been several aircraft. Fortunately they didn't have to be condemned, just refitted and reinsulated…and cleaned out. The barracks was light ship fire, but only a few of the quarters, lucky enough though two of quarters turned out to be mine and Nagase's (this Chopper gleefully reminded us about). The base was still short people, and we were assigned to some of the vacant quarters which then were yet to be filled.

For the next several days we were kept on high alert, running numerous patrols around the western coastline of Osea. They all turned up nothing. Moral was high. We had dealt the Yukes a major wound to their offensive capabilities, and we were feeling pretty good at the damage we had done. And we had the Arkbird giving us support. That ship was like white angel to all our forces. All of us had feeling of invulnerability as we flew. The high alert was over in sort time and more and more intelligence was received, and command started to regroup for our counter attack. Then we began the arduous reconstruction efforts.

Sand Island was hit hard and everyone at the base was giving some sort of duty to get it back into full function. Our patrols were slashed entirely for a few days, replaced by much needed rebuilding. Nagase, Chopper, Grimm and I were first assigned to ammo shed that had been hit by an off target shell, and it was a mess.

"Wow, looks like it'll be sort day. Won't it, Kid?" Chopper said.

We, and some dozen grease monkeys pulled up to the side of what was even a building anymore, just of pilled of red and black twisted metal. Starring I could make the steel plates that once covered the protruding columns. Traces of the blue paint still remain in some places, and ever now then I could spot a Gründer emblem.

"Everything blew up. The supports were fried and the entire roof just caved in. Then the fire started. It must have been like the end of the world," Nagase said as walked up.

"No kidding, and now we're damn well stuck with this fucking mess! Man I swear," Chopper said.

"Stop shooting that sour tongue off Lt. Davenport, and just get it work," a newly arrived Captain, who was in charge of that little party said.

"Hey man, you just got here. Don't start giving me that 'holier than thou' attitude," Chopper retorted.

"Knock it off!" Chopper then threw his arms up and walked away muttering softly. The new Captain just his eyes and went off to the opposite side on the wreckage. "Blaze, go give him a hand," he said and I went off.

It only took a couple of hours to load all the debris into trucks since we did convince a good many airmen to help us. What did take a long time was the loading of the debris into the barges that would take them off the island. Because of the attack only one of the loading was actually left in adequate repair to function; so all the loading and unloading had to be done my just one crane, and there was whole hell of a lot to be done. We spent some three hours just waiting around, never mind that it was some 100 degrees with high humidity. If that wasn't enough as soon as it was all loaded the Captain had a new salvage assignment given to us all, which many of us responded with loud groan of defeat.

We were directed this time to a group of wrecked planes that didn't manage to make it off the ground when the attack began, there were four of them and one was only in reasonable condition to be refitted. So we were all handed torches mask and got to the endless work of taking the complex fighters apart and then sending them to the scrap yard.

For some reason I found the work very revolting we the new Captain ordered us to the duty. It's not that I felt myself above the work. The planes were aging F-15's, old Eagles that were still in strong even fifteen years after the Belkan War. Somehow when I looked at them I saw aged soldiers maimed by the effects of war. Quite ridiculously I was sorry that we were going to take them apart. I didn't let the feeling stop me. I got to work almost before all of the other airmen. I started near the engine intake, and slowly worked my way back to take off the entire wing.

The heat was really getting to us by then. Even Nagase who was the only woman in the small work group was laced in sweat, but unlike the rest of us she actually still looked pretty good because of it. Resting for a moment I got a good look at her, the small jewel like beds of liquid running down her face to her chin as she leaned for respite against the plane body, then rolling her neck to here chest and onto the white tank-top she wore like the rest of us. For a moment looking at her my mind let of all my preoccupations and the weight of the war seemed to be lifted. I didn't let myself stay like for to long. There was too much to be done in war to concern myself with too much fantasy, especial for fighter pilots. I tied not to look not to, ironically, like a dog gawking and put her fair from my mid as I could, concentrating on the fighter's body instead of wingman's.

Sometime during the work I lost myself into my thoughts. Something about that F-14 Tomcat reminded me my old, unhappy life before I had joined the Air force. The airfield of Sand Island blew away from my mind in some phantom breeze and I found myself back in Lars' shop. I had just run away form my guardian and that orphanage which I live after he had railed on me for knocking down eighteen new stain glass windows that had just been imported form Sapin. I remember his face had twisted so painfully when I did it, and he swung he cane and ran me out of that yard. Whenever something like that would occur I would always go to Lars' shop. For one, Lars was one of the few shopkeepers that would tolerate me, and second, because one them Lars sold a lot of were photographs. Many he took himself. He actually was very good at it, earning several awards, at least he said. Most others were taken by a man I would later find out to be a relation of Genett. They decorated the wall in large collage arranged randomly. That day when I ran into his shop, he put a new one up, that he had taken a few mouths before. It was large aerial photograph of an F-14 in flight with a great sunset at its tail. I remember it as my first real look at fighter, the first time I saw one as anything other than a plane. I was in such awe, that I stood for nearly an hour just staring at the picture. And nearly everyday I would come in to look at it plus any other pictures of planes he had, which was many. I was so upset when he took it down that he gave me saw pocket size version of it for me to keep.

That photograph. I had forgotten about it completely. For very long time. It pained me to realize that I had never even looked for years and years. I nearly sunk in ridiculous despair before I realized I still had with me.

The old revere kept me well. It took a hand form Nagase to bring me out of the lightning rush of emotion, and her soft voice to bring my attention from the scrape piece of wreckage. "Blaze...?" It sounded so very soft for some reason. "Blaze, are you all right? You look as though one of us died."

"It's nothing." My attention again turned to the plane which now I noticed was in several large pieces waiting to be loaded and transported away. "I just was reminded of something." I knew she was going to say something else and I think she did, but I didn't want to hear it. I felt too much of mind was not in my control. It sounds like some lame excuse now, but reason just talking to Nagase just terrified me then.

Despite all the damage, and the personnel loss, the Base was back to near full operations in only a few days. And with the repairs that way long we were sent back in to the sky.

Every one of us was tense and I the most. Doomsday scenarios ran like water through my mind on the ground and in the air. Pops even checked me aside from maintenance duty on my plane and had a long "motivation" discussion with me. That gave me some confidence. Most of stemmed from an intelligence briefing that Hamilton gave us before we began renewed air patrols. It detailed the likelihood of another Scinfaxi class sub entering coastal waters and launching stealth missile strikes against coastal bases and the Capital, Oured. Because of that the Armed Forces were using everyone to create a virtual fortress around the country. Even though the Arkbird was with us no chances were taken, and my biggest fear on the first patrol we flew was see the white splash of one of those death missile launches. The fear gradually gave way to silent rage and I began to hope for another chance to destroy one of those ships. I regret that.

"This is Blaze, Chopper, Archer, you guys still with us?'

"Yeah Kid, we've been with you two the entire passed two hours, with the same blank radar screens. Man, you think they'd have the curtsey to deploy us to were the enemy is once in a while"

"This is AWACS Thunderhead; Wardog 3 cut the chatter and the follow the directed course."

"Roger that. I'm so sorry. Broke the silence."

I shared the frustration. We had been ordered to fly a fixed patrol path near the coast about 700 miles south of Sand Island for belief of possible air raids to be conduction for carrier launched fighter bombers, though through the entire duration of the patrol we didn't have a seagull squawk on the radar.

"This is Edge. Nearing turn point. Prepare to change vector to 180."

"Archer, roger preparing to change vector."

"And we start the circle over again," Chopper said!

"Blaze here, changing on my mark. 3…2…1." And so on and so on.

That patrol was by far the longest of them all. At least that was what it seemed to us. I remember dreading that they a tanker craft to us when our fuel was sued up. Luckily we were ordered to RTB.

Almost all operations ceased for some weeks, almost like the war wasn't real at all.


	11. A Handful of Hope 1

Fire

"Blaze, you are cleared for take off."

It had been some weeks after the operation, Frontline, our stand against the might of the Yuktobanian Navy and marine forces. Up to that that point it was largest engagement of the entire war with Yuktobania. There were only a handful of commanders who could remember more extensive that took place during the Belkan War. It was hard on us as well. Most of the wreckage from our bombed facilities, to our disabled fighters had been removed from the island, but it would be mouths before the Island looked anything like it hade before, even compared to start of the war. In the ocean there, laid across several hundred square miles there still was the wreckage of the aggressor Yuke fleet. It was sobering to say to say the least, and disheartening even to top brass who blamed it all on the Yokes. Blaming them didn't really accomplish anything though. The myself, and to Nagase, Grimm, and Chopper it more like the stage of the apocalypse, invoking images of ground zero in the Belkan Gate. Well, that was worse part of those moments after Frontline. I was mostly in a sort of limbo, flooded over with new responsibilities as a squad captain and de facto CAG, at least until the new Major would arrive from Oured, which he would, but by that time we were already considered KIA. In the early days when Bartlett was running the show on Sand Island I never really considered what a pain in the ass it was to be a commander of anything. All the nearly pointless reports I would have to submit to Hamilton, who I preferred to avoid, even more unproductive debriefings to Colonel Perrault, who I think disliked them even more than I did. Aside from that or maybe because of it I was uneasy during that time. Despite our victory and the Arkbird on our side I had an odd in effable sense that there something much more sinister in mist of war that surrounded everything.

"You're being a bit too suck up Blaze," Chopper said to me one time when were sitting in the rec room.

"Am I? And how is that?"

"You're letting that ass of a base commander get under nerves. That's why you look even more like a deer in the headlights even more than you usually do."

"Excuse me Chopper if dismiss your analogy. All I am saying that it doesn't really seem like this war is going to end anytime."

"And that's why I'm saying you're a deer caught in the headlights. We have an orbital laser cannon on our side and even with their new super-submarine carriers like that Scinfaxi, it would be suicide for them to start another invasion. So then the only thing Yuktobania can do is shove their pride up their ass."

"Well I think it might be a bit more complicated than that, "Genett, our resident reporter was there too. "From what I hear from my colleges in the Capital there is a lot of support for continuing the war among the military commanders and even the Harding Administration."

"So they wan the Yukes to pay for that damage we suffered, is that right?" Nagase, who had been mostly aside with her book, said.

"More or less," Genett answered. "Tensions between our leaders and theirs have come to a boil over that last few years. Even if public opinion is leaning toward peace many will still push for more war."

"Which is the vibe I'm getting from even every CO I've talked to. On top of that they're still not going to reinforce the squadron for several more weeks or maybe even more," I almost wanted to desert as I said that.

"Well c'mon Blaze. You're our leading ace for the entire Osean military. We as a group have more kills than most squadrons in the last war. If there is anyone who can handle the pressure it's the Wardog Squadron," Chopper said.

I fell back into one of the couches. "I didn't say I couldn't handle the pressure."

"Well good, 'cause I don't wan to fly with a lead with a defeatist attitude," Chopper said, simultaneously slapping me on the shoulder before he left the room.

Genett watch him go before getting up himself. "If I may…you are a genuine hero Blaze. At least on this Island," he said and then also the room leaving Nagase and myself alone.

Her demeanor didn't seem to change. She had such a focus, so much that I felt envious for some reason. I searched for something profound to say, or something at least cleaver, but I was never that good at that sort of thing anyway. So I just starred like a deer in the headlights at the ceiling trying to lose myself in my own imagination. However it wasn't that long before she said to me, "You've frown a lot Blaze."

I didn't understand what she meant but the seemed to loop itself in a sheep shank when I tried to say that. "uh…how do you mean?" I got out with some effort.

"Well…just from knowing back in the Academy. You used to shun away from this sort of…attention." My mind went through a time warp, not literally, when she said that. I say the old orphanage, Thomas, Lars's shop, the first picture of a fighter he had given me, the long and icy motor cycles ride, seeing her on the steps and the feeling of anger and uncertainty that plagued me back then. I knew exactly what she meant, eve more than she did. I would never have accepted something that the position I was in then even as little as a year before then. Bartlett, I think it was you that did that to me and you of course, Kei.

"I guess you're right," I said to her. "…Thanks…" I said, to which she looked up from her book. "You've probably been the greatest help to me, over the past few years."

She didn't say anything immediately, just looked at me; right in the eyes like it was something immense I had told her. She then smiled and nodded. I left to my quarters soon after that. I didn't know but there was something important that was going to happen the next day.

It was the twenty second of October, 2010. Like most mornings I was very uncomfortable getting out of my bed. My nasal passages were swelled and running from whatever was in the air, my sheets with usually pool of sweat from the humidity, the naturally grogginess from whatever I drank the night before. Something about the weather in the tropical regions did that to me. I think it was the countless palms that were all over the place. I don't know for sure because apparently I was the only one to have that problem. Even though it was before sunrise a lot of the personal were already. Several times when I would look to my window I would see Pops railing orders to all the crew chief to get the lanes ready for the Squadron. By the time I 'd get to the mess for some breakfast the planes would be lined up all ready for us, even it would probably be another hour or so before we took off. I f we did at all.

I arrived in the mess that morning much earlier than I usually do. Thinking back I might have been as much as forty five minutes early. Even so Nagase was still there before, never looking flustered by the early hours like most of the others in there. Grabbing some assorted items, whatever they were depended on the kitchen staff that day, I sat down at the same table. "Morning," she said nonchalantly. I said the same and ignored the rest of the items I drank the espresso. I felt too bad to say anything else, and before I got that chance I was much surprised to see Chopper and Grimm sit down next to us.

"Captain, good morning."

"Aw…did have to wake up this early Kid? I feel like somebody shot me yesterday," Chopper complained.

"It's not that much earlier than the usual muster, Chopper. Plus I think I…well we Have to report to the briefing at 0600, sharp."

"Why is that Captain? Do they have some response to the failed invasion?" Grimm asked.

"It's probably just new orders concerning our air patrols. Right Blaze?" Nagase said.

"Yeah. Well we'll se in a few minutes anyway."

"Oh joy. To hell with all these patrols. There's a lot better things we could be doing if you ask me," Chopper said.

If I knew what was going to happen that day I might have paid much more attention, but at the time I was too annoyed with Perrault and Hamilton to even look at them in the eye for more than a few seconds. So I listened to Perrault say is bullhorn of voice, "Since we thwarted their invasions we haven't seen any major enemy action for several weeks. Almost like we're at peace again people." And for the rest the briefing I just read and reread the typed briefing. The mission was a simple patrol. Wardog would split into two pairs and patrol the area surrounding Ackerson Hill. It seemed a bit unnecessary to me, since the area was surrounded and covered by the coastal AA defense grid. Unless it was stealth any aircraft would be registered on radar and if it was enemy, fired upon by numerous surface-to-air missiles. But it did mean keeping my friends out of harms way, which I couldn't complain about.

"That's it. It might be dull but consider it vital. We can't have the enemy sneaking on to our doorstep. Congratulations to the four of you," Hamilton said something to that degree.

"Excuse me sir," Nagase responded, since I barely even noticed. "What do you mean by congratulations?"

"Head Operations has recognized you vital role in the defense of Osea. You are now First Lieutenants Arré, Nagase, Davenport and Ensign Grimm. Good job but don't let it go to your head. We need your focus out there. That's all I have for you now people. Dismissed," the Colonel with something sounded faintly like admiration.

In a moment we on the air field fully geared and ready to fly. Despite the new rank I still felt like the world was coming down for reasons I would alter some to understand. Dawn was about to break as I approached my plane when I saw the silhouette of a middle aged mechanic who turned around and saluted me. "Don't ask me how, but I knew about it before you did."

I halfheartedly saluted in him back. No matter what the record says I will never outranked Pops, even in the sky. "If there is anyone on this base that doesn't need to salute me it's you. It's not important."

"Well obviously to you if that's how you are going to refer to your promotion. I'm only a second Lt. You now outrank me. Why not feel good about that?"

"Because it's not true," I said tersely.

"Well excuse me sir if I tell to shut up. Bad attitudes like that can translate into bad flying. You understand?"

I laughed a little bit. "Sure. I understand."

"Well that's a little better. Hopefully your squadron has little sunnier disposition than you. Now get in the game and under that canopy. You're armed with only air to air missiles. I don't expect there will any ground forces for you guys to engage. What do you think?"

"No I don't think so either," I said, suddenly feeling in a bit lighter mood than the moment before. Pops nodded to me then when to talk to Grimm, then Nagase and Chopper. I watched him for a moment before climbing into my plane. The F-18 seemed for some reason to rake away that feeling that the sky was falling. At least for those moments when I first jumped into the cockpits I felt actually free. Truly free of the war and the world. An old riff came to mind as I fired up the turbines and launched.

**-Sorry this is sort but I need to refresh my memory a bit before I can add more. This will be part one of two. **


	12. A Handful of Hope 2

Fire

Nostalgia has ways of creeping into someone's life when they lest expect it. I have no idea why, nor did I know what exactly I was remembering as the riff came into my head. It was simple, old, basic, classic, something from an old song I used to play back when I actually played gigs. Hearing it I felt like I knew something warm. Before the Belkan War. I felt almost as though I was talking to someone before I lost all recollection. Before I became Blaze. It put me into my own world for a moment, until I was roused by Chopper's bad jokes. "What are you doin' Kid? Tasting the rainbow?" Very funny. The turbines were fired up and the deafening rocket like roar of the Hornet crashed over me like a tidal wave.

I split the four of us into two flights as ordered by our highness of a base commander. Nagase and I fly the Northern area of Ackerson hill, while Chopper and Grimm took the southern area. It was supposed to be easy, as uneventful as the all the latest patrols we flew up to that point, but it never turned out the way we thought.

"Man, that old geezer of a base commander won't give us a break will he?" I mirrored his sentiments.

"He's relying on us First Lt. Chopper, hey congratulations on your promotion by the way."

"That's weird. I don't feel any better."

Nagase interjected, "Hey you two, what's your current position?"

"Three hundred miles south of ya'."

"Roger."

The transmitter then went silent for a moment, and truly I didn't expect it go off at all, or did I really care. I kept seeing my own past ghost come back to me. I kept hearing the sounds of that old town. I kept smelling the bad stench of the old mattress I had slept one for years at that place. I tried to put it out of my mind, shake my head free and stare into the gorgeous sun as we flew toward the west. Somehow I didn't even notice that the sun was setting. Each time I looked golden radiance would transform itself into the dingy corridor of that grade school, the HUD into the welcoming face or Lars, and the engine sounds into the assuring voices of Thomas.

"Blaze."

That name. Is it really mine?

"Blaze, I'm picking up a transmission."

I choke on my tongue realizing how lost in daydreams I was, pretty dangerous for a fighter pilot. "Roger, I reading it. 86 MHz. I'm getting something.

"…damaged but the damage is light."

"Transmitting aircraft, state your assignment and current status," Nagase said.

"Oh finally a response, this is the Osean Air Force Transport Craft Mother Goose One. We're flying to the natural country of North Point." The signal became in inaudible. "We have the transmitter set to minimum power. Please come in closer so we can hear." I had him at vector 187 about I think, he circling just outside of the AA defenses. It looked much like a goose as we pulled in C-5 Transport, meant for heavy cargo, but this wasn't carrying what we thought it was.

"Ah, I think this you on our radar. Can you see us? We'd like you to guide to a safe passage corridor through the AA defenses. We're on a top secret mission and are not transmitting a valid friendly ID signal to the automatic ground base defenses. As a result a friendly surface-to-air missile was mistakenly fired at us. We narrowly avoided a direct hit but our radar system was destroyed, and we can't navigate through the AA defenses."

"So you need an escort to get through to North Point?" I asked.

"That's right."

"Roger that. This is Wardog. Mother Goose One we'll guide you through the AA defenses."

"Thank you. We appreciate your support."

"Sure thing."

That's it began at least. There wasn't really a completely safe passage corridor through the system. You would only need a quick glance at the coverage area to realize that. There was though an area were the coverage wasn't uniform, a section of Ackerson that had high iron mineral count making the radar coverage full of hole and rips, that if done carefully could squeeze a C-5 through, but it was going to be hard fly for something flies closer to a brick than a bird.

"Mother Goose One, stick close to our six. We'll take you through this real slowly."

"We'll have to keep wide, or else they'll be fired upon," Nagase said.

"Yeah I got that."

It wasn't the only difficult part though.

"…uh the air defense command has just received multiple enemy hits on an enemy formation closing on your position. First bad guys we've seen crossing the pond in a while. Warning alarms are going off like mad but we're the only ones in range to intercept them in time. Hold on baby, we're coming to your rescue."

"Oh joy," I said.

"Understood, I'm counting on you two."

"We'll have to engage him head on when they arrive. Or else they'll blast passed us." I said.

"I know. And Chopper and Grimm might be few minutes behind." She switched frequencies to the Transport craft. "Mother Goose One. Push to radio frequency 136 MHz."

"Roger…switching."

"We're entering the AA coverage area now stick close to us, Mother Goose One."

The analogy of seeing-eye dog came into my mind. N that case, I guess it was more like a seeing-eye hornet. It was fairly easy entering the AA system coverage area. The difficulty that kept looking back and forth between my radar and back at the plane was one area that was going to force me to hook a tight vector change of 180 degrees while simultaneously weaving through the sporadic zones that were covered by the AA defenses. My blood began to pump madly whether it was because of the incoming bogeys or the fact that the lives of that Transport plane was in my hands. It was a feeling I had to get sued to.

"Mother Goose One, decrease your throttle and altitude. It's going to get tight in this corridor."

"Roger that Wardog. We're counting on you."

It was about here that the mission started to become…well let's say more weighted. We started hearing radio interference from the incoming Yuke Squadrons, and not just static.

"Okay I've them on my radar."

"Just like the intelligence," another pilot had said. Then a third voice came on, with a heavy commanding tone.

"Don't let up. We're in enemy territory now. Increase throttle, and set vector straight in my nose," it said. It was barely coming in, much of it distorted, but I knew this was the lead, of whatever squad we went up against that day.

"The radio is picking up the enemies voice," Grimm stated.

"These guys sound as beautiful as Thunderhead. Sweet as a rose I tell ya," Chopper responded.

"Try to ignore it and get here as fast as you can."

"Roger Kid, you didn't have to tell us that," Chopper said back to me.

As much as I tried to focus on guiding the plane through the AA systems coverage area, I couldn't help at times but listen to the Yukes. It wasn't the first time we were able to hear their communications and it wouldn't be the last. I just hoped that they couldn't hear ours.

"Don't let up just because it's a transport plane. If we bag this one, they'll not only give us a medal, they'll build a statue in our honor," the first pilot said.

The second one I think responded, "This cargo's certainly worth that much."

"Is this the enemy speaking, what are they talking about?" Nagase asked, and I was thinking the exact same thing.

"Don't worry about that. We need your escort," the Mother Goose One captain said. It seems slightly ominous now.

"Alright. Edge, you and I better double time this. Mother Goose One, I am going to get you out of this area as soon as I can," I said in an attempt to give everyone some confidence though, but I was nervous as hell going through that coverage area. On the radar it looked like innocuous circles, circles through witch I had to find a safe route through. I tired to keep the images of a SAM exploding and the heavy body of a C-5 come down to the earth in pieces. Nagase didn't say anything, witch said to me that she was feeling the same way. That didn't make me feel any better. The Captain of the C-5 did a good job to ease the silence, witch I'm sure was gripping the "cargo" of that plane in a strangle hold at that moment. Too bad really.

It only took a few minutes to guide the plane out of the coverage area. But was the least of problems I was going to have to deal with.

"This is Osprey 1. I have a fix on there position. Everyone better be me, unless you want to be the first one shot down."

"Roger that." The enemy said. I found myself pressing down on the throttle more.

"Never thought the skies over our own country could be so unfriendly."

"Warning. We're having oil pressure problems on the right engine," one of the crew in the C-5 said.

"I'll take the controls. You check the instruments for me." I felt like I should have said something, but I couldn't thin k of anything helpful, or anything that mattered. "It's okay. It was just a sensor malfunction."

"This going to be memorable," I said to Nagase.

"Don't worry Blaze. I'll keep you six clear. Mother Goose One, we'll be out of the AA coverage area shortly."

"Roger, we appreciate your support."

We came on the edge of the coverage area, watching the radar indication circles disappear into the landscape. At least one of the burdens was gone.

"This is Mother Goose One; we've successfully navigated through the AA coverage system. But if I might asked, Blaze, if would could request your further support," the Captain asked me.

"You have it. We'll keep the fighters off your back. Proceed at full throttle out of the combat area." I looked through the canopy, north, ahead of me, feeling as though a great dragon was coming to get me, some childish nightmare from my lost past. And a dragon this gut was indeed.

"Wait, I see escort fighters!"

"I thought there wasn't going to be any escorts?"

"Did all of you really think the intelligence was correct? That this kind of target would have zero support? I expected more from this group.

"This Osprey 1 to Meteor 2, get you group in a tight finger four formation. The rest of you are on me. And no one is breaking formation! Now remember your training. For the glory of our country!"

"This guy…he sounds like veteran Blaze," Nagase said to me.

"Yeah I figured that."

"Copper team has arrived," she said.

"He kid, we're under your command now. Don't let that tough talk get your nerves up. Let's see how they fight in the air!" Chopper said.

Grimm agreed with him, "That's right Captain. Let's show them what the Four Wings of Sand Island are all about!"

It's hard now to say exactly why, but I suddenly began to laugh, almost uncontrollably. It sounded so much like the "Legion of Superheroes" to me, some pompous line taken from the latest action flick, like the in we used to worship like God back in the Academy. I needed though. I might go as far as to say that I might not bee alive toady if not for the vote of confidence from my friends, my best friends. I had to do it. I had to fly for my fiends!

"Alright looks like eight of them coming in hot. Don't let them take control of the fight. We can beat them when it comes to flying. Wardog Squadron, engaging!" We broke the finger four formations, splitting up into two wings. It wasn't ideal going to on one, but we had to do it, we couldn't let one of them get into firing range of the transport plane. I pushed up the throttle passed mock one, intercepting the first group. I saw the flash of the sunlight of the canopy, and slowly the dense shape of two wings of SU-27 came visible. "Make sure, none of them get passed us, we can't afford to let them get into range."

"Understood. Everyone prep SAAM for firing. We have to take them on long range," Nagase said.

"Yo kid, you really think we'll be able to take them all out with SAAM? What if some of them slip through and go our precious cargo over here?"

"We'll just have to deal with that when it happens. Don't allow any of them start to run," I really had no idea how we ere going to keep all eight of them away from Mother Goose One. If even one starts to run and we turn to fire the SAAM his wingman would come in on our six. I pushed the thoughts from my mind we had just to run with it. We rolled right and pulled in, so we could come in on their right, but that Captain was a step ahead of us.

"Osprey 1 to Meteor 2, deploy now."

"Roger that." The second wave, which I then noticed was comprised of high speed MiG-31's suddenly accelerated at full throttle, toward Mother Goose One. And I suddenly yelled fuck into the radio.

"Edge on me!" I didn't wait for a reply. I pushed the after burner even higher going after them. I got a lock on the SAAM and let one fly after him, being careful to keep him in the targeting ring. It hit and saw one of the wings on the MiG blow off toward the ground.

"What? Meteor 4's been hit!" one go the pilots exclaimed.

"We have two hornets on our tail. Turn to engage!" The element lead and his wingman jinked right, turning their nose toward us, while the third kept flying toward the transport plane.

"Blaze, I'll take care of this one," Nagase said to me.

"Roger, I'll keep these two off your back." Rolled right and pulled the nose up, trying my best to keep and ye on them against the g-forces pushing my head into the back. Like a lead weight attached to my neck, it always feels like, it's something I just had to get used to. I guess they were trying to double time me, one dace with me on his tail while the other chased my six. The only problem was that they didn't know how fast I was. It was probably less than a second before I had one in my HUD, and had missile lock. "Blaze, fox 2!" He didn't have any time to react. The missile detonated and tore through his fuselage, and he was gone.

"WHAT! He already has our tail?"

"Meteor 3, pull out. You'll just get shot down flying like that!"

He jinked left to disengage and turned toward the transport plane to check on Nagase. "Nagase, what's your status?"

"Bandit's down. I'm fine Blaze."

"Aw…shit! Kid, Nagase get over here and give us a hand will ya'?" Chopper said over the radio. They had their hands full, in more ways than one, since it was no ordinary enemy lead we were flying against that day. "Grimm, EVADE! He's right on your six!"

"I'm trying, he's hard to shake."

He was coming out of a split-s, following Grimm as pulled up to rejoin Chopper. I felt that odd sensation again, that same dread I had when I first went up into the air. The fantastic adrenalin rush. I told Nagase to assist Chopper, and pushed my throttle up to come in on his tail, at least that's want I wanted to do.

"Osprey 1, bandit on your six!"

"I know. Stick to your wingman. I'll handle this." He rolled right, inverted his plane and pulled down toward my far left, and I followed. "Look's like you Osean dogs made the wrong the choice."

"Don't count in it." I said into mask, not caring whether he heard me or not. He pushed his throttle up, leading me through a merry-go-round of loops. Straight up, rolling left and pulling a hard turn using his rudder to keep him stabilized, then all of a sudden breaking straight. It was enough to make me dizzy, but not enough to shake me. "I'm not letting you get away." I each time he rolled, pitched any which way, the more determined I became to bag him, my own demon growing inside me. Rolled over left as to turn, and then right. I was coming up, in missile range but with the way he was moving there wasn't much of a chance to get lock on him, Osprey.

"You fired up? C'mon and get me."

"Careful what you wish for."

"Kid, where the hell are you? You keep jumping in and out of radar." I knew I was pursuing him too far. I didn't have unlimited fuel, but I was convinced I could get him.

"I'm fine. Just cover the transport plane."

"You should pay more attention to your friends, buddy. Letting your killing instinct drive you is a sure ay of getting yourself killed." I was getting tired of his condescending attitude.

"Blaze, this is Edge. I coming to assist" I didn't hear her.

"C'mon buddy you've been chasing me for awhile now. Are you ever going to shoot?" I didn't have the angles near good enough to get a sure hit, one to make sure he wasn't getting out.

"Just wait." I pushed up the throttle, just wanting to get close enough to shoot. I didn't realize the whole point of leading me around like that was to get me riled up so I couldn't read t he tide of battle. This flight, this pilot would teach me a lot bout that. He shot up suddenly as if to go into another sharp climb, as he had already done a few times, but that wasn't what he was going for. He put up his flaps, nearly stalling his plane in the rapid deceleration; I imagine his head was spinning because of the negative g-forces. He slowed down and I over shot…majorly.

"It's never smart to fly solo in battle, kid." The cockpit lights went red, all of them I think. I heard the high pitched tone, and the panicked voice of Nagase, and for some reason the only thing I could think of doing was pushing up the throttle and rolling right.

"You can never just fly around shooting kid. You won't hit anything and the other guys will shoot back," Bartlett said to me.

I never liked paying attention to the basic maneuver drills. They always seemed so "no shit Sherlock."

"Keep faith Blaze or you'll just end up on the wrong side of things all the time," Lars said as handed me the tomcat poster.

Why did I always have to isolate myself?

"Why don't you just swallow your damn pride and enjoy your life Blaze?" Thomas said.

"When you get in there, just hold the stick and push on the gas. Physics will take care of the rest."

Who was that?

"Yo kid, did you ever hear of that band called Puddle of Mudd? You haven't. You have to get out more."

Amidst the eternal waves of time…

Why can't I play this? Why is so much harder than everything else I played?

"That was pretty good, kid. You might consider toning it down a little," Lars said.

Ridding a motorcycle in the snow sucks. I always ended up with a bunch of ice on my lips.

The plane hit the water. I saw all the bodies in the waves.

The storm shall rise…

"It's tense I know, but try to relax Blaze. It can make the difference whether you live or bite the dust." Bartlett said.

I overturned the bike on some ice, smacking my head against a tree.

"Ensign Blaze Arré you've been assigned to the Wardog Squadron."

The missile exploded over the cockpit, shredding the pilot to ribbons.

Nagase always was writing something. What was it?

I can't get it. Why is it so hard?

Out of the abyss…

"Blaze, maintain altitude. Keep that plane up! Blaze!"

The wing blew off the flanker's body, almost hitting me.

The air raid alarm went off again. I was trying to sleep.

"Did you hear about that guy Mobius One? Kinda makes you jealous doesn't it?"

Who is that?

"You gotta stop being so introspective. It will just blind you to everything else."

The alarm went off. He had me.

"I'll watch your back, Blaze. I won't lose another flight lead."

I made a hard right. It still was on me.

"Besides what you see in movies kid, when missile alarm goes off in the cockpit you have less time than to blink to evade," Bartlett said again.

I inverted, pulling the nose toward the ground.

"Just go with it. Man you worry too much kid."

Chopper?

The eyes of a demon…

The burst missile exploded. Everything started to fall.

I can't get it! Not like this!

BLAZE!

The blood settled back down, to a point where I could finally think again. I had barely made it. A difference of a second and I would have been dead. I'm not sure how I did it. It seemed like something inside of me had taken over while my mind off in neverland. Even after the fact when we returned to base I was left with an ineffable feeling. Who was that voice? What was that presence inside my head?

"Kid? Are…you alright?" Chopper asked me.

"I'm fine, just kinda blacked out for a moment there."

"The missile didn't hit? Aw damn!" Edge had gotten behind, gripping his tail harder than he preferred. "This is Osprey 1. All planes pull out."

"But sir, we can't just let the transport get…"

"That's an order, we're over matched here. All planes set return vector for the Lazarus now. How did you evade that?"

He pulled a hard right pushed out the same as the attack axis he came in on. "All enemies down or no factor." It dawned on me that I had completely forgotten about the transport plane. "Mother Goose One, what's your status?" There was no answer immediately.

"Hey! It's Dutch rolling!" Chopper said.

"Something's wrong. I'm hearing scuffling over the radio," Grimm said.

"Mother Goose One, what's your status?" Nagase said.

My stomach tightened for a moment. The plane was still on radar. Nagase hadn't let it be shot down. Somehow though, I felt had done something wrong. "This is Transport plane Mother Goose One." Even then we thought the voice was he. "There was a spy in the crew. Uh-oh two of the engines have shut down."

"Hey what kinda cargo you got in there? Is it something dangerous?" There wasn't any answer. "Hey you there?"

"The Captain's dead, and the co-pilot was wounded by a stray bullet. Tommy's holding the stick now. He's doing his beat but he's just a secretary. He's never piloted a plane before," he said.

"So who are you?" Chopper asked.

"Uhh…I guess you could call me the cargo on this plane. Could you tell how to control this? I'll relay everything to him." I wasn't sure what to do; luckily Nagase seemed to make up for all my sort comings that day.

"Lower your altitude. Prepare for an emergency landing." It was the only option. "Put your flaps up. That will lower your air speed. Can you find your flap lever?"

"Flap lever…is that it? No pull that one Tommy," The Cargo said.

"Captain?" Grimm was hailing me over the radio, "Do you think that spy was the reason the Yuke penetrated so far into our airspace?"

"I'd say that's as good of a guess as any."

"An emergency landing, Kid? The ground's full of electro-generator windmills!" Chopper shouted. They were hard to se from the air but he was right.

"Could you shoot those down for us?" Mr. Cargo asked us.

"Let's go it," Nagase replied.

"What?! Nagase you can't be serious."

It wasn't an easy thing to do. Even though the windmills were hundred of feet high, in the air they still don't appear as much of a target. "Alright gang. Everyone have some missiles left."

"Roger Captain. I still have two sidewinders locked and loaded," Grimm responded.

"I have one kid, plus a full load of guns," Chopper said.

"Alright, Mother Goose One just keep descending we'll clear a path for you."

"Okay…just stay clam Tommy."

"This'll be difficult I'll have to aim carefully," Grimm said.

"I'll go first everyone." I only one missile and some guns, so I just dropped in low and blanketed the area. Nagase followed and did the same.

"Okay Tommy those broken windmills will be our guideposts. Are you still there mame. The one with the lovely voice…miss…"

She does have a lovely voice.

"First Lt. Kei Nagase…sir," she said, almost to make a point.

"Aw, and a lovely name as well."

"And I'm Chopper." It sounded almost like a comic relief moment, you read in classic plays.

"That's a good name too," Mr. Cargo said.

"I like you man!" Chopper responded.

"If I might aloes know your name, the lead pilot…"

"I'm…" I was hesitant for some reason. I was becoming more and aware of whom I was talking too. It was one of the few times I felt intimidated in front of a superior. For a moment I was talking to Thomas again. "First Lt. Blaze…sir." Why didn't I give me supposed surname?

"Yes…Tommy's doing his best but I don't know if we'll make it. So before we go I just want to thank you," he's always so apologetic.

"You'll do fine," Grimm reassured.

"Yes…you'll be okay," Nagase echoed and I was hoping nothing more was going to happen.

"Altitude 100 feet. Almost there I think."

"Mother Goose One just keep going!" Nagase said with even more passion.

I suddenly saw myself again, falling into that water.

"That's a pretty good runway there a fine place for a landing," Mr. Cargo said.

I felt a cold on my fingers. The transport was nearly there. Almost done.

Mother Goose One…

"Mother Goose One, landing confirmed," Nagase said and someone left my cockpit.

"Are you alright, Mr. Cargo?"

I had nothing to say to him. Politics of any sort never had an effect on me then. I guess was still proud, even as the leader of Wardog Squadron.

"Uh…Yeah. That was a pretty smooth ride, actually."

"Mr. Cargo. I have question I want to ask you."

"What is it?"

"The bird of peace…did you really have to use that beautiful white bird for this war? Do you understand what I am saying?" Nagase saw it more clearly than I did, at least then.

"Yeah…"

"I wanted to see your…your bridge of peace span into outer space."

"It's still possible. Thanks to the bird, we're on even terms now. I trying to get to North Point because I believe we have a chance."

"To hold talks in neutral territory…" Nagase said.

"Right…communication is vital."

"So I can still believe in you then. I don't want to see any more young men or women lose their lives in this war," it could be said by all.

"Me neither."

The silence that ensued seemed sort of appropriate. Even Chopper couldn't come up with a quick response. Yet he was the next to speak.

"Uh-oh, I'm out of fuel."

"This is the Osean 8492nd squadron we observed the emergency lading on our radar. Can you see us? You can leave the rest to us. We'll provide support till the transport's crew is rescued."

"Roger 8492nd Look after them for us," Nagase replied.

"Sure thing."

I hate it. There was no way to have known. No of us found out the reason that squadron was there. Of course by that time it was much too late.


	13. It's to War

Fire

The relative clam we were experiencing was about to end. At least among the four of us, Nagase, Grimm, Chopper and I, the world seemed to have glimmer of hope after that mission. I'll admit to some hope, but I still couldn't shake the shadow that seemed to be following me around. Nagase, I think at least, had the most. She believed in the bridge of peace, a future beyond the war she had volunteered for. It must've hit her hard with what happened after that mission.

For a while I was finding myself increasingly alone. There's this place I noticed once when I was landing on the western side of the run way, right where the paved concrete of the base turns the sand of Sand Island. It's typical of the rest of the island-palm tress and tropical flowers. The thing that's there that doesn't find much I the rest of the base is a bench, and some peace. The day after Ackerson Hill, about October 22, we found ourselves on alert and with little else to do but sit. Rather than practice fighter maneuvers or music, I wanted to just sit, get away from it all. That spot has a great view over the Ceres Ocean, really beautiful when get passed some of the wreckage that was still floating around form the invasion. It was enough, at lest for me, to forget about my duties when I sat down.

"It's never good to fly solo in battle, kid." I kept hearing his voice, that pilot, the Osprey. I saw the missile barely pass by me. I saw the shape of his plane. The SU-27, black wings, a grey body. And I kept hearing Bartlett's old lectures from months upon months before. I was mad at myself, mad that Nagase had to be the one to save me, and awed at my luck.

"It's the finger four, kid. The lead, and wingman. One goes in, the other watches his six. Don't leave your wingman and you might lust survive in real battle." I really didn't like to listen to him back them. I found myself regretting it.

"Blaze, when you're on a bandit you have to be patient. Don't think about shooting him down; don't even want to shoot him down. Just watch what he does. That'll keep you from overshooting." Pops said that to me. I can't remember when.

Despite my wishes I was only alone for a little while before some one found me. I was lying upward, staring at the light as it came through the leaves of the palm trees when that journalist, Genette silently came into focus. "Looking to escape the reigns of authority?"

I guess it surprised me, because I heard the words and was dumbfounded for a response. I could only stare past him at the palm tree nearest to us. He starred at me somewhat perplexed, like something was wrong. I hastily sat up trying to get myself together. "I was…" I trailed off. The words seemed out of reach. "…I just needed some time to myself."

"Well, I can understand that. You've had a lot on your plate lately." He said, sitting down on the bench beside me. It was silent for a moment; the only sounds were the ocean, and the gulls. "It's beautiful, isn't it? Sometimes, looking at the Island, I forget there's even a war going on at all. It's so peaceful, even though there was a battle here not too long ago."

"Yeah." I saw Nagase in my mind suddenly, sitting the crew room wit her book. What was she writing?

"Blaze," he began to say and stopped as though it was something heavy, "I've wanted to ask you something, but I just haven't found the right place." He treated it as though it was something important, and I felt a little hostile to answer.

"Yeah, you can ask me anything you don't have to be shy about."

"I'm sorry. You're just happen to be the person on the base I know the least about. And you're also probably the most important. Anyway all I've wanted to ask is why did you join the air force?"

It was a question I hated getting. Not because it was asked all the time, but because I could never find a good answer to tell anyone. And consequently I would say something I didn't think made any sense at all. Yet somehow, that time when Genette asked me my mine actually worked. "Because of the freedom."

"The freedom?"

"I don't know if it's really true, but from the first time I saw a picture of a fighter jet it seemed…" Lars put the rubber band around the polished edges and handed it to me. Osprey came down again right behind me. "Unstoppable, unmatchable. You know like the phoenix or the…"

"The what?"

"The demon the…oh the Razgriz. Growing up in an orphanage I guess I longed for freedom. And I needed a job when I was out on my own. So, why not be a fighter pilot?"

"I see. I had the same feeling when I graduated from high school. Just wanted to get away from where I was. See the world," Genette said.

"Why not become a soldier?"

"No thanks. I'd rather have this job."

It was a nice moment. And the first time I had really talked to the man for awhile. I suppose I was ignoring him for no reason whatsoever, just nervousness.

"Nagase seems optimistic." Genette said. "Do you think now that Yuktobania has bee thwarted, that the war will end soon?"

"I can't say," a group of gulls settled down on the beach ahead of me. I found myself watching them as I searched for something to say. "I think there's more happening upstairs than we know. So I'm just going to keep my mouth shut and follow my orders."

"Hm, I can understand that. Captain Bartlett said much the same thing…when he was still here," his tone got heavy. I guess the thought he hit touched on a nerve.

"Yeah, well he knew a lot more about flying than I will ever know."

"Are you so sure of that? You're the leading ace in the entire Osean Air Force as of now. And it's not likely anyone's going to catch up with you any time soon."

"Oh? You're following the stats that closely?" I asked.

"I'm a reporter after all." I felt somewhat like an ass right then. I hadn't read his article about us. Somehow I felt as though I had insulted him.

"Yeah…and I'm a pilot." We just sat then, sort of like before. It wasn't uncomfortable. I t wasn't as though I was sitting next to stranger anymore. Again it didn't last long, for Grimm came screaming over to me.

"Captain! Captain!"

"I can never get away from him either."

"Responsibility has a way of finding you when you don't want it to," he said, and I silently agreed with him.

Grimm ran over as though he had sprinted around the entire base, and he was sweating enough for that too. He was breathing so heavily he could barely say anything. I almost laughed at him. "Yeah Grimm, what is it?"

"…huh…Captain there's…there's a call for you…" He said still gasping for breath.

I wasn't expecting it. Central command would usually never bother calling a first lieutenant for anything. "What? From whom?"

"Central…huh…it's direct from central."

"Looks like you've gotten some attention Blaze," Genette said. He was trying to make a comment I know but the call was anything but good.

"Okay I've got it," I said hopping to my feet. "Thanks Grimm."

"Don't mention it."

There's few places on base you can take a call from the mainland. One of them is the Colonel's office, a few scattered around the officers quarters, and the front administration. Since I never liked going to Perrault, I went the extra distance to the front desk to take the call. A C-130 was landing, making my dash across the runway a bit dangerous. I hitched a ride on one of the patrol cars and was at the front administration in about four minutes. The front clerk was a bit overwhelmed; she almost didn't see men when I walked in. "Blaze!" she shouted waving to the door behind her. I walked in briskly almost roughing the door off its hinges.

Hamilton was there, speaking to whoever was on the other side of that call. He watched me come in said a few words before putting the receiver down on the desk, starring at me the entire time. "Well it looks like you've someone's attention Lt. They won't tell me what's going on. I even tried threatening to sick Perrault on them."

I didn't say anything. He sounded like he was trying to help. I'm not sure how.

"If they threaten you just hang up. We have your back Blaze." I walked toward the desk, turning to the side to squeeze passed Hamilton. He put his hand on my shoulder. "You're the best there is Blaze. I won't let them tell you otherwise."

"Thank you sir. You didn't have to do that."

"Don't worry about it," he said and walked out of the room.

My heart thumped a bit as I picked up the receiver. It was like I could feel the prejudice coming from thousands of miles in Oured. "Sir I…" I tired to sound like good soldier.

"Is this the substitute commander of the 108th Tactical Fighter Squadron? I am a speaking to Blaze Arré finally?"

It was a bit ironic since I was trying to introduce myself in the first place. "Yes sir. This First Lt. Blaze."

"Lieutenant, we has questions regarding your mission the other day. I trust you can provide us with some answers."

"I'm sure I can sir."

"Fine. Your report said that the aircraft you encountered in the Ackerson Hill vicinity was a C-5 Galaxy class air carrier. Correct?"

"Yes sir."

"Your report also states that this plane was carrying 'cargo' correct? The Captain did not report any passengers."

"uhh…Yes sir."

"And you are absolutely about this identification? Your squadron's deputy commander concurred?" Her name is Nagase.

"Yes sir."

"Right. Your report says that the craft was a quote 'top secret mission' correct?"

"Yes…"

"And you did not question the Captain of the air carrier further about this?" It was bit out of left field.

"No sir."

"You did not question the merits of the aircrafts claim?"

"It was leaving Osean territory. Yuktobania doesn't posses of C…"

"You then escorted the aircraft through the AA defense, and protected from infiltrating Yuktobanian Aircraft correct?"

"Yes."

"You then relinquished cover of the aircraft after it had preformed an emergency landing to squadron that appeared form vector 012? You never then questioned the squadron captain?" Why would I do that when he had a friendly IFF squawk?

"No…I did not sir. They identified themselves as the…"

"I did not ask you for that lieutenant. I have no more questions for you at this time. We'll review your report further and asses your command decisions." He hung up not even bothering to dismiss me. It was strangest phone call I had ever received. Central never bypassed the base command to interrogate a squad leader. Little did I know it wouldn't be the last time it happened? There wasn't anything I could really do about it. Bartlett was still missing, and that made us the subject of suspicion in Central. I couldn't get the phone call of my mind for the rest of the day. Like my own shadow, the feeling of anger and anxiety followed me around no matter where I went.

"Soldier's like us are too stupid to make decisions on our own. Kid, when you're told to shut up, shut up."

"You know fifteen years everyone though the peace accords would solve everything. The truth is though, a lot of fighting when ink was already dry." I didn't really pay attention to the rest off my duties I just wanted to get away.

The few days we had escort mission over various spots on the western coastline. Mostly command just wanted cover for all their air carriers in light of the leakers that penetrated our airspace on the October 21.st Not the most engaging work for the four of us, but we weren't complaining. The war looked close to ending, and we would no longer have to fear for our lives on the ground and in the air.

I found myself doing nothing again. I spent l to of time just starring wet, wondering if Bartlett was as board as we were in whatever camp he was in. That's were I imagined him at least. We wouldn't actually find out till much later. The ocean was able to instill some sort of peace in me. The smooth motion of the waves, the constant sound of the surf hitting the sand, the unending vastness of the dark blue.

Things weren't so great on the warfront then. The Arkbird, our one trump card against Yuktobania firepower, fell out of our hands as Nagase put it once. A clever saboteur had successfully planted explosives in one of the supply packages sent form from the ground effectively crippling the spacecraft. It was bad news for us, with the memory of the Scinfaxi still fresh inmost of the nugget's minds and our own. And just a few days before I was hoping for peace.

It was the last day of October, and sun was starting to rise later. I think it was somewhere around 1300 or sometime. The briefing for us seemed on the spot but maybe that was just how the top brass wanted it for us. I think I was messing around some recently arrived sidewinders when we were all summoned to the briefing room.

"This is something kid. Don't ya think? A military operation right after the 'peace negotiations.'" Chopper sad walking with me and Grimm.

"Do you think the negotiations failed? Captain is this an invasion?" Grimm asked.

"I have no idea Grimm. you might not want to shout that out."

Nagase was waiting for us by the door, as though she had already bee there an hour. "Couldn't any of you been a bit more prompt," she said to me a bit sarcastically.

"We were busy." A shadow passed by the door which was barely open. "Who's in there?"

"Almost everyone," she said as we all took our seats.

I kept hearing Grimm's question over again in my mind for the next few moments. Looking around at the faces of my fellow pilots I think we all had the same idea. I spied a landed C-130 out side hanger, to next to our planes. Pops was overseeing the ground crews unload the bombs.

"So this is what it comes too," Nagase was leaning over my shoulder looking at the same thing I was. "It almost ironic," she said it with such a sad tone. I heard the door open and three sets of footsteps enter and all of us stood to attention.

"At ease," Hamilton said and turned the overhead targeting data projector.

"Attention. Our army is finally ready to strike back of the Yukes for their attempted invasion of our homeland and their audacity for starting this war in the first place. The goal of this operation is simple, to invade and occupy the Yuktobanian mainland. Alright, let's get this briefing started."

"Great."

"It's almost like fifteen years ago," Nagase said without looking at me. "Don't you think?"

"Let's hope it doesn't go that far."

The briefing wasn't anything we didn't expect. There were statistics on enemy forces and locations we would have memorize as well as detailed topographical terrain maps. The coup de grace was that we only had the night to it. To sum it up, there would be four landing groups, "A" through "D" that would land on target location, Bastion Peninsula. They would land and proceed to neutralize enemy pill boxes throughout the area. The number of which was to-be-determined, bad news for the ground ponders. We would be supplying close air support throughout the attack on the coastal defenses then neutralizes base defenses on the "Fortress" at the head of the peninsula. It all seemed a little ambitious to me. General Howell, or rather the Supreme Commander, appeared assured that we long the 66th and 135th air squadrons would be able to achieve air superiority in time before the Yuke attackers could do any real damage to the lading forces. Of course, there were attack missions on Yuke airbases that happened in sequence. Still, I can't help but wonder now how much trust he had in our abilities. Of course that trust wouldn't last long. It was called "Operation Footprint" Osea's invasion of Yuktobania.

"Area supported by coastal radar stations, gun batteries spread throughout the area, an unknown number of pill boxes…" Nagase didn't even bother with the rest. She was obviously tired, and I was too. The four of us had ended up meeting during the night in the mess to over the copious amounts of data that was dumped on to us. Chopper didn't last that long, he headed off to his quarters not long after we got started. Grimm fell asleep on the table next to us leaving just me and Nagase. "It's a big operation."

"You don't seem too happy about it."

She sort of sighed and laughed at the same time, closing her eyes in a sort of tired delirium. My brain hurt with all the topographical detail to say anything else.

"Maybe it would have been better for us to just have gotten some sleep," she said before nodding off, her hand spidering through her black hair.

"Maybe it could have been different Blaze, but you must remember that God works in mysterious ways."

There is no God in this world; else I would have had some parents.

"That's the same pathetic attitude you've always had. Don't you see with all the pain in make your life just that much more beautiful? That much more holy."

Beauty's in the eye of the beholder. Therefore my life is just as hideous as I see it.

"Come and give up your attitudes Blaze. Why won't you just let your soul fly?"

A shadow invisible in the darkness, that's what I am. No different than the dirt on the ground.

There was someone standing before me. All I wanted to do was reach out.

I woke out of my own delirium ready to stab the next person I saw with my pocket knife. I suddenly remembered why I had always avoided cram sessions during school. I don't think anyone can memorize anything well when they're that tired.

"Why can't you understand this? Get out of this house!"

There's a storm coming. What if I drown?

"You think I care what happens! I'll show what I think of dissident son's!"

I felt the pain in my right shoulder. The shearing needle in the surface of my skin.

I must have fallen asleep on the table, and somehow Nagase would carry me to my quarters.


	14. Lit Fuse

Fire

"Wardog, approaching Bastok Peninsula. Bearing 301. Ten miles."

1630 hours.

I don't remember exactly when we launched. It was dark out. Chopper was cursing up storm after getting into an argument with one of the ground mechanics. I remember just feeling an extreme annoyance as I sat in the cockpit waiting to taxi. Grimm was nearly sleeping. I remember seeing his head bobbing back and forth as he tried to stay awake. I was somewhere between tired and drowsy, sort of straddling the line between grogginess and focus. It was already ninety degrees in the cockpit. Nagase I didn't see. She was already in the cockpit before I even reached my plane.

"Alright, when they finally get their act together in the tower you'll launch until then we got a moment." Pops had climbed up the side of the hornet, using the moment we had to give me some points of advice. "They're most likely having trouble getting the landing forces and the commanding AWACS to agree on a landing time. Even though it's the day of they still don't have anything together."

"That's comforting," I had said back to him, rolling my eyes at that mission.

"Yeah, really. No I've equipped you all with two large bombs to give the landing teams some support. They're five hundred pounds each. Bunker busting. They'll put a hole the size of hangar in a pill box. I suggest you use them against the coastal positions. I wouldn't get too motivated in supporting them though, Blaze. Make sure not to leave yourselves vulnerable to fighters. Leave it to the attackers when all you kids move to take the fortress." He said though he had just read it in the newspaper.

"And how do you know about that?" I said, not really caring for the answer. Pops had his ways, and mysterious means of achieving tasks.

"A young fighter pilot told me, through the looking glass. Now keep to your wingman this time," he pointed his finger at me, like a scolding grandfather.

"Yes sir." The faintest light was coming over the Eastern Ceres, time for the end to begin.

"Wardog, approaching Bastok Penninsula. Bearing 301. Ten miles."

"Roger that Thunderhead. You got that everyone?"

"Loud and clear kid. Let's see who can sound the least excited about this mission," Chopper said sarcastically.

"I still don't understand it." Grimm responded. I felt the same way, but what could I really say at that point. What could we do as a squadron to save the world?

"Well stop trying Grimm. Since when is this world supposed to make any sense. And we get stuck invading another country."

"Stop mouthing off Chopper. We need to focus on supporting the ground forces,"

Nagase said. There was a tone of annoyance in her voice, and sadness.

"Wardog approaching target coordinates. You should have a visual on the beach by now."

The coast emerged like an old memory, fogged, clouded with mystery on and unknown horrors. I had the sensation for the moment that I was going back in time, traveling my veiled past, discovering new truths. It was quiet for those moments. There wasn't anything to say. Even Chopper didn't want to say a joke about the operation.

We were in range. I could see the landing vessels approaching the coast, small streaks on the water, barely visible in the bad weather. The four companies, I couldn't shake the feeling that it wasn't enough, not nearly enough to take the beach. I just had to hope, hope they had the tenacity to bear the burden of fire.

"This is AWACS Thunderhead. Wardog proceed with first mission objective. Commence bombing of coastal radar stations. Knock 'em blind."

"Roger that. Moving to bomb radar positions." I almost wanted to defect. "Everyone ready?"

"I'm on your tail, Blaze," Nagase said.

"Yo kid, we're ready. Lets just get this over with!"

It wasn't hard, at all really. Bombing things by that time was like napping. There were only two radar stations, at least only two that were our targets. Copper lead the assault on the first, Grimm giving him support. I lead the assault on the second on the northern end on the beach. It all looked like something from the end of the world. Flak had been suppressed by naval bombardment, so altitude was entirely up to our discretion. Flying low I could see everything. Enemy positions, the advancing companies. Looking hard enough I could even see the rifles the troopers were carrying. It caused me to feel very removed from it all. Maybe this is how God feels.

"Target destroyed Captain…" Grimm said, and Chopper seemed to be muttering under the static.

"The four companies will now land at their designated beach heads. Commence close air support."

"To hell with this war. We nearly get killed defending the coastline and this…"

"This is Company D, we're almost at the beach." I could only imagine how tuff it was for them. We could complain about interminable missions, the hundreds of hors in the air with nothing to do. But we were still in a comfortable cockpit. Those guys, the ground forces had to put up with all the elements. The cold. The damp. The dirt. And the pain.

"Go! Move forward. You're almost there. That's it. Row! Keep rowing!...To hell with this war," Chopper was in the worst spirits I had seen him in. Come to think it, he was in the worst spirits I would ever see him in.

"Chopper…" Nagase was talking to him. "Stay focused. It's the time to be discussing that."

"Yeah right. We were that close to peace…supposedly! Now we're the invading forces…and our guys in the ground are the one being shot at? C'mon you can't seriously think any this is smart."

I should've cut him off.

"They think this can all be solved by the point of a gun! They think that invading Yuktobania will ease tensions worldwide! They think this will make our lives better! But they're just so…"

I agreed with him. That was the problem. I agreed with him too much. I had been through too much to objectively tell him to shut up.

"…And this will bring peace…Can't believe the president. How could the president have authorized an escalation of the war like this? We'll get bogged down in this forever. Hey that Mr. Cargo gut was the president right? Man I thought I could believe in him back then. I had no idea he was such a wuss?"

I was too late…

I imagine the sensation Nagase was feeling. The intense confusion, anger and bitterness, combined with sorrow and shame. It sucks really…all of it…

"No…he's not…"

There was a moment of silence, blistering and deafening. "Alright Chopper, Grimm get back here. Let's form up and provide close air support to the boys on the ground…and drop it…"

It was like before, the mission when were ordered to escort the three carriers in the inland sea. That one that went so badly. General mobilization, everyone they could get their hands on. It was comforting to see them all in the air, but still kind of sad. Our numbers were a lot less, because most of those pilots were dead. There wasn't much tactical thinking involved since all of our orders would come through AWACS.

Our forces were in range. The Yuke's coastal artillery positions began to plug away at our ground forces, before they were even on the beach. I tired not to emphasize with them. No distractions, a big rule for any pilot of any craft. Mussel flashes, because the day was so dark, were visible even from two thousand feet. And the radio became full of the ground forces chatter.

"This is Company A, landing successful. Deploy the armored vehicles now!"

"Move! Move! Land already! Hit that beach and start running! There's no time to kiss the ground!" Chopper shouted.

"Calm down Chopper. Get ready. The Companies will be in range of the bunkers soon," I said.

"Yeah. We'll have to time our attacks right when the ground forces attack. If we're off we risk hitting our own forces."

"You don't have to tell me twice Nagase. I fingered that out on my own," Chopper responded.

"I'm kinda nervous. I can't see anything on the ground," Grimm said. It seemed out of the blue to me, even though he was probably feeling it the whole time I was bickering with Chopper.

"You'll do fine Grimm," Nagase consoled. "Just like we did the other day."

"Roger that…like the windmills."

"Don't remind me," Chopper said.

"This is Company B. Our attack's getting held up by fierce fire from the bunkers. Halt the enemy fire with an air strike...we'll charge in a t the same time."

"Well speak of the devil…" Chopper retorted.

"Wardog. This is Cipher 1. We're held up with some anti-air fire. Can you take care of that?"

"Roger Cipher 1. We'll move in to destroy the bunker. You armed Nagase?"

"Ready Blaze. I have the coordinates now. Cover my six."

"Roger."

To say that it was easily to destroy the bunkers would not quite be the truth. It sounded easy in my head defiantly but in actually I was never good at studying the terrain. To put it bluntly, we had to do a bit a weaving to even get to the target. It was tough, for a moment I thought she was going to hit the deck when the altimeter warnings came on.

"Edge!"

"I'm alright Blaze." She sounded. Means I wasn't the only one who was beginning to panic. "I have the target. Dropping…"

I dropped speed a bit to confirm the destruction, pushing it a bit. My airspeed was almost too slow to stay air born. It was a bit stupid. If a gun had been placed there I would have been saying goodbye. "Target destruction confirmed."

"This is Company B, thanks for the close air support. Company move forward!"

"Nice one Nagase. I'm sure they'll appreciate it."

"Drop it Chopper," I was getting tired of it.

"…"

"Wardog, we have support quest from companies C and D. They're being held up by the coastal pill boxes. Close in and take them out. Fly top cover for the armored vehicles," Thunderhead just dished out, almost like we were food servers and not fighter squadrons.

"Man…"

"…alright Wardog engage."

We moved out. Still the four of us were only so much help to the ground forces. With only eight bombs between all of us. It was one of the few times I was wishing for more fire power. I took the bunker for Company D, and Grimm for the bunker for Company C. and as soon as that was over more support where in. It was only a few minutes before we were left with only air to air missiles and our guns.

"That's it Blaze."

"Great. Chopper, Grimm what's your status?"

"We're fresh out of bombs. Guess that's it for us."

"Wardog maintain altitude over the peninsula. Maintain air superiority and provide support whenever possible."

Great. We ere still stuck there. I was beginning to feel a lot like Chopper was. But we still had to follow orders, and we still had guns. The companies pounded through the second position of bunkers faster than they did he first despite the losses they took from the howitzers which were still firing from the ahead fortress. A and B were impressive. Overhearing all the chatter from the chatter from the ground forces we heard a lot of admiration for the Captain of Company B. I couldn't catch his name, but he was the oldest soldier there, and obviously knew a thing or two about tank combat. D had a "balls to the wall" commander, which was either good or bad depending on who was talking. We did get request from one of the lieutenants to drop a bomb him. C was having trouble mostly due to their. One soldier remarked "He's following the textbooks to a T. They'll see through every move we make." Though. Too bad we were out of bombs.

I thought we were going to have a boring continuation of the mission. But I should've really stopped making predications.

"This is the Commander of Company A. We're pined down here! Need close air support now!"

"We're out of bombs here. Wardog 1 to Cipher, can you handle that for us?"

I was expecting a prompt. What else from a flight lead? Except I didn't get any response at all. "Cipher 1, come in." Still nothing.

"Thunderhead to Wardog. We can't see Cipher Squadron on radar. It's like they just disappeared. Ranier Squadron proceed to bomb target coordinates."

"Negative. We're currently engaged with an enemy fighter squadron. We can't comply!"

"Dammit. Wardog proceed to Ranier Squadron's coordinates and shoot down those fighters."

"Well now we're getting a little action," Chopper said, finally in a somewhat lighter mood.

"Captain what do you think happened to Cipher?" Grimm asked.

"I don't know Grimm. They may just be out of contact range."

"So quickly? Weren't they engaging the coastal positions with us?" Chopper remarked.

"We don't know what happened to them! Right now we to engage those bandits," Nagase said over the radio.

"Roger that. Let's go everyone."

I felt something oddly familiar about the situation. I couldn't pin it down so I just ignored it. "Alright. Here we go." It was hard to see where the engagement was. Aerial radar wasn't worth that much with the weather so bad, and the also meant poor visibility for dog fighting. I couldn't help but ask myself what Yuke squadron had the balls to engage enemy fighters in such weather. Considering it was only a few days since the Ackerson Hill incident I've at least suspected it. Maybe Nagase remembered, after all she had bailed me out the last time.

"Always keep an eye on your surroundings Blaze. You don't want to try a split s and then crash into the deck," Pops had said. It was going to be low and it was going to be fast. I felt my heart become a bass drum in the process.

"This Wardog we're coming to your assistance Ranier." The radar finally picked them up, just barely. The contacts dropping off and in, and the background noise was pain to deal with. We were going to have to rely on our eyes, but how was that any different from all our other engagements? An explosion in midair. Some one had been hit.

"Shit! Wardog get over here! Ranier 5 was just shot down!"

"Relax guys. We're already here to rescue you." Chopper said, almost sounding like he was a knight in shining armor. There were five bandits, split into two, two and one fighting solo. I wasn't too concerned about him, at first.

"Chopper team, help our Ranier 2 and 3. Edge and I will help out 1 and 4."

"Roger that Captain. Now you're talkin'."

The fifth bogey was going high. It was going to be hard to keep an eye on him.

"They're heading low Blaze." I could see what Edge meant. The Ranier 1 and 4 had split and their pursuing enemies had followed suit. They had split up…

"Dammit. You think you can handle one alone?" I knew the answer.

"I'll be fine…I won't get shot down."

"Alright…lets it over with fast." I rolled, turning the world sideways and rocketed off after Ranier 1. It was a bit frustrating. Why had broken off from his wingman. Why had he been so stupid to make the same mistake I had made? On previous mission…when you're alone, that's when you get shot down. He pulling low and fast trying t lose the bogey in low altitude. Really dangerous and risky considering the visibility. It reminded me of Bartlett for a moment.

"Shit. This is Ranier 1 I need some help here!"

"This is Blaze. I'm one his tail Ranier 1. Just don't do anything risky."

The target indicator came on. I had him on radar. He knew it too. He started pulling a sharp left, then right, almost everything but going high.

"C'mon."

I close. Nearly had missile lock.

"When we got'em that close, you tend to lose track of everything behind you. That's why you stick with your wingman."

Nagase was held up.

I had the lock. I fired, the missile trailing a whit tail. Whether that was a kill of not I didn't have time to tell. My warning lights came, missile hot on my tail. I pulled left and down hard, pretty fast. The g's became so intense that my vision blurred for a moment, despite the flight suit. The lights went off. I had dodged it. It was that fifth plane, the one that had gone high almost as if he was returning to base. He had dived some thousand feet, getting me in missile lock and firing while I was dog fighting with another bogey. He was good. And I should've known,

"Well, fancy meeting you again." It was the same pilot, and that same plane. Osprey 1, that ace that had nearly handed my own head to me on a platter. "What did I tell you about flying solo kid?"

"You should talk…diving down like that. It's a bit reckless don't you think?" I changed vector heading right at him. He wasn't going to fake me again.

"That was a good kill though. You're a damn good pilot…"

"Shut up."

I got on his tail and he pushed his throttle up to pashed mach one. Then he pulled up trying to lose me in a loop. I made sure to watch his airspeed.

"I thought Osea believed in peace…what happened that shinning future that president of your promised?" He flew the coastal mountains, nearly sciding the bottom of his plane on the ground.

"You're the ones who started this war."

"Really? And who were the ones buying out our resources to build their precious 'bridge to space?'" He kept getting lower and pushing his throttle. This was getting dangerous.

"What about the Scinfaxi? You think building those weapons was bringing peace!"

I closed the distance. It was getting to tight use missiles. I knew I wasn't going to be able to keep up. From the way he flew he obviously had done this before.

"A precaution…you militarized space! Osea put a laser cannon on the 'white bird of peace.' And so peaceful you are. A lethal pilot like you."

"You tried to assassinate our president! Is that so peaceful?!" I had a lock. I fired. The missile followed him mirroring his movements before he ducked into a fork in the ravine and the missile exploded against the hills. I lost him! We're the hell did he go?

"All's fair kid. You shouldn't act so 'holier than thou.' Don't you know your own reputation? A triple ace?"

"It doesn't matter." I didn't want to fly up. I'd risk him getting behind me and plugging a missile up my ass. I was stupid to have followed him that far. I knew the rules, why did I keep breaking them?

"…right. Since when does a fighter pilot not care about his kill record?"

"Since me…"

I was tired of waiting. I was tired of hearing his voice. I was tired of feeling like he was better than me. I was tired of arguing over the damned war. I pushed up the throttle, flying a seventy degree climb. It was tough, the plane didn't want to do it and neither did my body. I had come up with an idea, which in hindsight was the worst decision a pilot could make. I had never done it before. I didn't know of anyone who had done it before. But I was angry, angry enough to forget any limitations I had at that point. I think became the demon for the first time, then, there. Nagase was hailing me. But I wasn't hearing her. I wasn't hearing anything.

I warning alarm came on. He was tracking me. I cut off the throttle, nose past ninety degrees, my blood flooding my head in the negative g's. I put on the air brakes to slow the plane down even more. And finally I stalled, still in the air for second before the nose fell back toward the ground. Right at him. He was a lot closer than I had anticipated. Too close to lock on and fire. I let up the guns not really aiming at anything, and not air speed the move the plane. It was so stupid. If he had fired I would been dead. But he didn't.

He tired the pull away, but he caught in my line of fire. The right engine and wing of the Su-27 exploded and he plummeted toward the Earth. He didn't get out.

I pushed up the throttle gaining jest enough speed to not crash and burn.

"Blaze!" Nagase yelled. "…"

"Holy fucking shit Blaze! Are you insane?" Chopper said.

"Captain that was…incredible."

I was already feeling bad about it. "Yeah Grimm. I don't want to see any of you do it."

We formed up again heading back toward to the landing companies. I was really low on fuel from that maneuver. We're going to stay that long.

"Blaze. That was some flying there." Nagase said.

"That was reckless flying there."

The landing forces had successfully taken the fortress. Thanks mainly to the air support of Ranier. No one was sure what had happened to Cipher Squadron. I thought Osprey had shot them down, but we wouldn't find out whom till much later.

(A/N) I finally got this done. To all of you that read _Fire_ I asked respectfully that you review. I haven't gotten feedback in quite a while. So any reivew and the reviewer will be greatly apreciated.

-Stonehenge


	15. Blind Spot

Fire

"Blaze you're cleared to land. Welcome back Wardog!" He sounded so enthusiastic.

I should have been too. Why wasn't I jumping for joy at shooting down an enemy ace? Osprey, he was responsible for shooting down over dozen of our planes. He had tried to assassinate the President. I should have been glad. Yet I still couldn't get it out of my head, how stupid. For some reason I felt like I had failed as a pilot. Bartlett would have had a field day with me if he saw how reckless I had been. How I bull-heartedly followed him into the ravines. And how I had deliberately put my life at risk to shoot down the enemy, the Yuke ace? "You never over commit kid. If I see you to start flying like a hot shot I'll personally kick your ass." That's what he would have said to me. That's what I felt so ashamed about.

"Blaze," my wingman said. She kept trying to get a hold of me through the dozen hours of the journey home, but I was nearly entirely incommunicado. I didn't want total through anything. I wanted to fly, and enjoy the loneliness.

We landed as a wing, as we always did. We weren't nuggets there was no need to waste time landing each plane separately. Just get it over with.

My helmet hit the ground. I had taken it off when the canopy opened, and was a little forgetful when I was climbing down the ladder. Strange enough I usually just jumped most of the time. I spied Pops in the hangar, he was working on the training jets in Hangar C, or maybe he was asleep we had arrived early in the morning the next day. The sun hadn't even risen yet, and it was still hot as hell on the island. I would've talked to him usually but I was too angry at myself. Really stupid in hindsight.

Nagase called my name. I think she was still exiting her plane. I pretended like I didn't hear her, heading straight for the lockers to get out of the strangling flight suit. I walked fast trying to outpace her, like I was running from my own past. The door opened inward and pretty much kicked it open to find some one the other side. I was ready to curse the hell out the person giving them a fierce glare to ward them off, especially if it was one of the replacement pilots. It wasn't anyone I could order around though.

Genett grunted as the door hit him. He was probably coming out to asked us how the mission went, the status of Osea's invasion, and any accounts he could publish. Like any journalist. He looked he was caught in front of a car's headlights. We starred at each other for a moment, myself trying not to blow up at him and he asking himself what happened. I swallowed my anger then. He didn't do anything, so what use would it have been to take it out on him?

"Sorry, Genett."

"It's…okay. What happened?" I brushed passed him heading down the hallway toward the sign marked "men's locker." "Is the invasion successful? How did you huts fare in bad weather conditions?" I didn't say anything. He could hear it all from Chopper. "Are you just going to ignore me?"

I remembered Thomas then, asking me if I remembered to praise God for my guitar. "It's successful…We've invaded Yuktobania. We're headed to Cinigrad."

He tried to say something more, but he had gotten the point that I was not in the mood. I wasn't proud of the way I was taking it. In fact it was probably contributing to my anger. Maybe it was the war? I was taking the frustration f the invasion out on everyone else.

Too much was happening for me. I suddenly realized how much I cared. For the squadron, for the Island. I blame Pops for that.

Nagase by then had caught up. I could hear her talking with Genet through the wall. Chopper was there soon after along with Grimm. I tired to ignore their voices. I tired to isolate myself yet again. I didn't want to bother any of them with my misery. If I was a bit wiser, I would have known that I didn't have choice. I was zipping down my flight suit. When I heard someone else enter. Chopper, I expected to hear a crass or sarcastic comment soon. I expected to be able to ignore the person.

Nagase looked annoyed. I guess that's understating it. I knew she was angry. I had tried to ignore for the entire flight, fifteen or so hours. She was angry enough not to care about subtle formalities such as sex segregation.

"Blaze…"

"Don't…" I made an audible sigh. Not helping the situation.

Nagase did like wise, looking to the left before back into my eyes. "Where do you get off…?" I thought she would curse at me, but only bit her lip to keep whatever venom it was inside. "How can just ignore us like that?"

"It's easy, you don't listen."

"Dammit…can you stop being selfish for one moment?"

"Selfish, you think I've been selfish?"

"You could at least respond when I talk to you."

"And you can realize that we don't to talk every moment in flight." I turned away, both physically and mentally from where I should be facing.

"Why are you acting like this? This isn't like you Blaze."

"I'm acting the way I'm supposed to act. The way they tell me to. The way all of you expect me too." Why was it happening? Why was in this?

"What the hell is wrong with you?!" I turned around, almost ready to throw another meaningless accusation. She was there. Her brown eyes and all my anger turned to nothing. "So you shot someone down…we've done a lot that." She said it so softly. It was a paralyzing moment. All the desire for what I wanted to do, constrain by the knowledge of what I couldn't do. Paradox, and we might have stayed that way forever. I knew Kei was feeling the same way, from seeing that look in her eyes. Those brown eyes… She looked at me for a long time, seemingly torn by the same paradox that I was.

…ablaze in majestic flight. It lasted long time, but the only made the moment all the more painful. But as well for that moment it all left me, all the hatred I kept all my life, all the pain I lived through, the unhealed that I still carried, the burning, the inescapable suffering, of all that gave birth to me. Fifteen years before…1995…

She knew it, as I did whenever it crossed my mind. Then what we wanted could not be, and should not. The commander wouldn't stand for it if he found out. If we had pursued it the inevitable prospect would have been our separation. She nor wanted that. She wouldn't lose, no matter the uncomforted, no matter the pain she would endure. She starred at my chest for a long moment, before leaving the men's locker room in a rushed exit. I was flooded with mixed feelings by then. How could I resolve it? The tree that falls…How was I going to continue to be an effective leader if couldn't myself under control? I couldn't think, only feel, feel the intense the confusion and try to cherish the beauty I had in my grasp for that moment.

"Well…" The word drew me like a match from myself. Chopper was there scanning me over with the widest grin I would ever see on his face. I glared at him as hard as I could, stare him down like a wildcat. But the new material he had was too much to be stopped.

"I had really hoped you would calm her down but…whoa, God Damn! I didn't expect you to do that good of a job," he laughing all through. Exactly what was so funny about that?

I began to hastily change out of the flight suit doing my best to ignore him, but he still wasn't going away.

"Oh c'mon Blaze. You're taking this so the wrong way," Chopper said, like I supposed to take his advice.

"Really Chopper? And how am I supposed to take it?" I asked harshly, hoping he would take the hint and shut up.

"Well, you could smile. You scored in my book!" He responded.

"You see her smiling?" She wasn't crying when she had stormed out, but I'm sure she would have like to. I was wrong, but I had been wrong most of my life. If I could have cried back then, I'm sure I would have.

"Ha. Ok I know you're worried about the fact that fornication breaks a few measly regulations. Not to mention if that stupid old geezer of a base commander found out, you two probably will be shot before you're court marshaled. But c'mon, there were stars falling from heaven there."

"Right."

"Right, but that's only a problem if others find out. C'mon Blaze you really think we would do that to you guys?" Choppers asked.

It was the "we" that caught my ear. I scanned the room hastily and found him. Grimm nearly had back himself into the corner. And I might as well had my sidearm pointed at him given his expression. He tried to say something several times before he got it out. "Don't worry Captain. I…won't say a word about it!"

"You see Blaze. You have nothing to worry about. So what's the problem? You should have kissed her there."

"No…" They were right on point. They didn't have to say it, but I knew them fairly well by that point. They would never do that. Genett probably could keep it in confidence, and so could Pops but I doubt he would have approved then. It wasn't the time. Because of the War, because of the circumstances, because of Bartlett, because of my fear.

I left the locker room much the same way Nagase did, looking for salvation in the long cold of that time. I was just moving not thinking. I walked a few places around the base without any real direction. The hangar, my quarters, the rec room. I really wanted just to move, maybe pick up my bike and ride around the mainland, around Cape Landers. There were some nice sights around there if you rode long enough around the highways. But where could I go? I was on an island.

Somehow I ended up in the briefing room, staring at the map of Yuktobania. Of all the places in the world, of all the countries, we had to get involved with them. Why? The arguing came to mind. The mid-air bickering I had with that pilot. He had said we were exploiting them. Osea was the culprit for their grievances and the Union of Yuktobanian Republics had no choice but to declare war. Nikanor, he was the Prime Minister, their leader. We knew little about him. There had been little press about the Yukes for long time. Our President was promoting peace, using defense finds to build a bridge to space, didn't Yuktobania help in the construction? Didn't they want peace the past six years as well? I had never paid that much attention. Thus I had answers, only more questions as the war dragged on.

I knew someone was going to find me soon. Solitude was a commodity I never had enough of, but was not someone I was expecting.

Hamilton seemed somewhat intrigued. I wonder why, did he find my disposition funny, or was it my confusion? He had large under his arms, the Osean Seal on the cover. "Here you are. Nice of you to make my job easier."

I turned and saluted trying to put it all out of my mind. "Sir."

"At ease. I actually needed to talk to you Blaze."

"About what, Captain?" I asked.

"It seems that they sent you four home early. The Yukes are retreating through the Dresdenne region. There's a bunch of transport aircraft bringing ordinance to Yuke forces there."

"They want us to shoot them down. Sir, why not just ask the Naval Air Force? They'd be able to get there faster," I said.

"You four are the only ones available. Besides, you remember the majority of our naval air forces were crippled by the Scinfaxi. Most of the other pilots here have been routed elsewhere. The briefing will begin in thirty minutes. You'll launch immediately after. I suggest you assemble your team, 1st Lieutenant," Hamilton said, turning his back to me. It wasn't going to end. I had feeling of powerlessness, something I avoided. We were going to be tossed from one mission to the next without any time to recuperate. The brass still treated with suspicion, yet relied on us like a crutch.

It seemed easy enough. There was a civilian town near the area, Charlie Omega which was the code name they came up for the region. It was a good distance away from the projected path of the transport. No risk of collateral damage from our missile attacks. That was how it was supposed to be. Easy mission for four aces, the Four Wings of Sand Island.

"Your mission objective is to engage and destroy the transport planes. That's it people don't make this harder than it has to be." The Base Commander seemed somewhat satisfied. The invasion was in his interest, and in the interests of Osea. What was peace? What was the chance to end the war to him? "Make sure of that lieutenant." He had to give attention to me I guess. Or maybe he was actually impressed with me for once. I looked to Nagase, she didn't; show any reaction. "You've had some good luck lately. If you feel a need to down any more enemy aces, feel free. But don't screw this up. Alright people, dismissed."

"We get no time to relax, even after we just invaded another country," said to me as we walked toward our planes after suiting up in the locker room. "I mean, c'mon we don't even get something to eat while we're here."

"The Yukes aren't getting any rest either. We have to cripple they're defensive capabilities if we ever hope to get to Cinigrad," I said trying to get the hypodermic injection of anxiety I was experiencing under control.

"Yeah, you sound like the base commander when you talk like that, Kid."

"Don't you think now that we're on their soil they'd be willing to settle for a peace arrangement?" Grimm, who had been scampering behind me asked.

"Don't count on it Grimm. You think the Yuke military is going to be happy and generous now that we've invaded their country? This is just going to make a hell of more complicated for the future. Any of you realize how long we could be occupying the country if we succeed in taking the capital?" Chopper responded to Grimm's question.

Nagase was with us, not listening or at least pretending not to listen to the conversation. "Well don't need to be talking about this now. There'll be maybe a dozen transport planes in the air. We don't have that much time to intercept," I stopped at my F-18. I realized how much of a bond I was developing with the hornet. I felt the same looking at it as I was looking at any other solider, any other person.

"I know that Kid. Besides what you think, I actually do pay attention once and while to those briefings, however repetitive they become. See you in the air, Kid." He walked Grimm watched him go they shot a glance at me, before figuring out he should go to his plane as well.

"The end will come..." Nagase was waiting, looking at the Wardog emblem emblazed on the side of the plane. Maybe she was thinking of Bartlett, what had become him during that invasion. "I use to think that. I thought with the world the way it is, it couldn't last." She looked at me, eyes piercing as some holy light from the night. "Now I'm not so sure, Blaze."

"It will end. I'll make sure of that. Just stay on my wing." She nodded before heading to her plane. It was blazing hot that day in Sand Island, even though the sun still had yet to rise. I wondered how the weather was looking on the other side of the world.

Our hornets were fitted with external fuel to give us the range we needed. We had to fly fast, or else the transport was going to reach central Yuktobania. It was tough but we were finally used to extended intercepts by that time in the war.

We came on their six only few hours later, the thousands of miles flying by at mach two. "Look's like we're here," Grimm said referring to our arrival in the Dresdenne Region, only few hundred miles from the transport.

"The weather's cleared up…if that's any good news," Chopper remarked.

"This is AWACS Thunderhead. Wardog you're closing in on the transport. Fifteen miles."

"Roger that AWACS…Let's get this over with," I didn't feel so bad when we left the island. Flying over the Ceres I actually I was confident, but al the hours of flight were getting to me. None of us had slept in the past thirty-six hours. Kind of amazing we could still keep our planes in the air.

"We'll be in range soon. Everyone clear?" Nagase asked the squadron.

"Yeah, yeah Nagase. We got he just of it already," Chopper said.

"Alright…" The sky looked so peaceful that day. Much different form the pathetic fallacy of the landing just the day before. I felt a bit said I was going to have to shoot them down over their own country. So was war.

"Alright team. We're in range. Let's drop the extra fuel tanks," I commanded. I felt the plane suddenly jump as all the excess weight was dropped off a lot like bombs heading toward the surface. A huge burden off our shoulders. Those would have made it hell to dog fight with the Su-27's and deadly if they had any Typhoons on hand. The tanks weren't empty but they would only be a hindrance in the air.

"Howell's going to make that address soon," Nagase said.

"Yeah, and do you really want to listen to it?" I asked.

"It could help…maybe…" She responded.

"I don't think we have choice on hearing it. It's going to be broadcast on all frequencies." Grimm said.

"Just ignore it. We're on mission," my radar picked up the tail of the transport. Time to make it rain.

"Oh wait…Hey, hey, hey Blaze. Did you take a listen to that song?"

"What…what song?" it was completely out of left field. Only Chopper would remember stuff like that on a sortie.

"You know…I gave it to you. Three or maybe two days ago." I didn't remember, and I still don't remember him ever giving that song to me.

"…Sure it's good …" I didn't know what I was talking about but the radar was showing a lone bogey coming head on. We needed to pay attention. I'm sure Nausea was laughing at me over the radio.

"Yeah, That 'Face of the Coin' is a great tune huh?"

"huh…We have one bogey. Heading 277. Coming head on," I said. I could the flash of the canopy. It looked like a standard Yuke escort fighter. The pilot had some balls to come and try to engage on his, but I still wonder what the hell he was thinking. Maybe he wanted some payback for the invasion?

"I see him…Edge engaging."

"Archer engaging."

"…whoops…Chopper engaging."

"Blaze engaging." I saw the dark outline of his plane and rolled, hooking a hard right fly away. It was a stupid move considering how close he had already come to us.

"What was he thinking? Trying to take us one to four?" Chopper yelled.

"Just let him go. We need to save our missiles for the transport," Nagase said.

"We'll keep on his tail. He's heading right for the transport." I began to hear some static over the radio. I heard some broken words of a voice I had come to be familiar with over the past few days. General Howell, he had real belief in making motivational addresses to the Osean Soldiers. A sort of romantic idea that one eloquent speaker could sway the hearts and minds of an army and of a nation. It seemed real cheap to me at the time, to try and win the war by inciting rebellion in Yuktobania. I couldn't help but think what a waste of it was to try and circumvent the Yuke military.

"Look's like it's started," Nagase said.

"Due to current circumstances we've been forced to set foot on Yuktobania with weapons." But they were circumstances we were partially responsible for. "However our true enemy here is the Yuktobanian Military who started this unjust war." How humble of us.

I could almost see the transport planes, and the radar was starting to act up. The radar started to clear up a bit as we approached the transport, but that wasn't making anything easier. The radar was showing triple the signature we had expected. Way too many for the four of us to take down on our own. Looking at the radar one would have thought the entire Yuke air force was in flight, like one giant aluminum cloud filling the sky. It didn't make any sense.

"Unbelievable!" Nagase summed it up.

"We have to bag all of these planes?" Chopper exclaimed.

"You think enemy plane in the area is up in the air and flying?" Grimm said. Maybe I couldn't tell at that point, but there was still too many even if what Grimm said was true.

"Well let's asked them, 'Hey how many planes you got there?' Man this is making me cry," Chopper complained over the radio. Two more signatures were on my radar, I still couldn't see any of them.

I started to squint my eyes, alternating from my radar to the air, trying to find the target. I looked down to see an unfriendly fighter signature flying right at my plane. I nearly broke formation, my heart jumping from chest then back again. There was nothing there. The contact the radar was showing was not there. "What the hell?"

"There's way too many signatures on radar. Kid, Nagase How about you guys?"

"My radar's showing strange results as well. There's something going on," Nagase said.

"Roger that. I still don't have visual contact," I said, trying to resist the urge to fly in and see what was going on.

"Hey…h you don't think…" Grimm said weakly.

"Think what Grimm?" I asked.

"Uh…that…" Then I heard a voice over the radio. It sounded like the enemy had caught on that we were following them. It took them that long?

"I think I've figured it out." Grimm said, unexpectedly.

"Well do share your keen insights will ya please. What's up?" Chopper said.

"First Lt. Chopper. Jammer aircraft!" Grimm responded, it sounded somewhat comical. The jammer aircraft were creating the false contacts; it wasn't anything we had encountered before.

"So it's a trick" Chopper said. He was right though. We could hear the enemy's voice over the radio. Something about, "How could this be? I thought out new jamming devices were supposed to be perfect?"

"Ok I feel better now. Ghosts aren't so bad once you figure out the trick behind them," Chopper said.

"It's going to make more a problem for us. Tally-ho, I can see the end of transport now," I said. It was only few I could see, large C-130 transport planes.

"Where are the jammers? They must be somewhere nearby. Let's take care of them first," Nagase said.

"We'll have to. Our XMAA's won't lock with this level of jamming," I said. And suddenly felt a bit sheepish with my choice of weaponry for that mission.

"Great and I thought this was going to be a milk run." Chopper remarked.

"Don't let the jamming confuse you. Repeat don't let the enemy's jamming confuse you," Thunderhead was yelling over the radio, as if he needed to tell us. I spied some escort fighters heading toward us; it would be mess to engage with them with the jammers.

"Concentrate on shooting down the enemy jammer craft. The transport can wait." Thunderhead said. Did he think I didn't realize that?

"Roger that. Geeze, Edge you with me?" The bad feeling I had kept getting worse. The deck just seemed stacked against us.

"I'm on your wing Blaze. We have bogeys inbound," Nagase said.

"We'll keep off your tail Captain. Take care of the jammers for us," Grimm said.

"Copy that Grimm." I pulled the noise, pushing up the throttle into in sixty degree climb at just passed mach one. It's tough on the body. You can literally feel in the acceleration force stretching out the wrinkles on your face, if you had them that is. There hardly any cloud color and the sky was bright blue. That was to our advantage at least. We leveled off at near ten thousand feet, the jammer craft had to be around there. "It'll be an E-767 at high altitude," I said to Nagase, "keep your eyes peeled." The radar was getting worse and worse progressively. At least we were getting closer. There were several signals that looked like fighters dancing around us. It felt like we were being chased by our own shadows. We spotted one only a few seconds. No escorts. It seemed they taking to much pride in their new jammers.

"You see it Nagase?" I asked?

"Yeah. We'll have to get closer to use our guns. We don't have any heat seekers," Nagase said. We flanked it. Edge taking one wing, and I taking the other. It didn't really have a chance. Unarmed what could it do? We heard Chopper curse in frustration ins dealing with the escort fighters without the use of missiles, or a functioning IFF. The enemy was just as frustrated with the jamming. Once the E-767 was shot down the radar went clear. We see that end the transport perfectly. They were still more jamming planes to deal with, and not just that.

"That helped a bit," Nagase said.

"Let's keep going at this altitude," I said to Nagase, "there's bound to be few more of those."

Howell's statement started to come in again with the jamming aircraft was shot down. "We wish to work hand-in-hand harmoniously with the citizens of Yuktobania for this operation. I've instructed our soldiers to follow this wish to the letter. Therefore I asked you, citizens of Yuktobania, do not fear us but rather join us." The static we up again. We were nearing the next group of jammers.

"Hey," Chopper hailed me," you think it's going to be that easy?"

"Nah, it's never that easy," I wished it was. Even then I knew more was going on than meet the eye. What did Nagase think then? How did Howell's less than holy attempt at subverting the Yuke authority sit with her?

"I don't think so either," Chopper responded.

"Hey, form up. We need to take down the rest of the jammer aircraft."

"Whoa…sorry Kid. We got a little but distracted."

"We're coming on your wing Captain," Grimm said. "Hey Capt…wha…"

"What the hell," I said to myself. The radar went crazy. I couldn't see Nagase on my wing with all the interference.

"Enemy…jamming wav…inter…ence," Thunderhead was trying to get in contact with me.

"Edge can you read me?" No answer. I let off the throttle a bit, searching for her face in the cockpit of the hornet. She was okay.

"This is the 8492nd leader. All 8492nd planes proceed as planned." What was that? I could make sense of anything on chaos of the moments. I kept checking my six to make sure we weren't going to be bounced from behind.

"Dammit…even our radio's…can't…" It sounded like, but the overlapping signals I was in a medley of distorted voices.

"Kid…you…the pl…on t…air…?" Chopper was I asking me something. I couldn't understand a word he was saying.

"No…"

"How can y…ay…hat…th…jus..rud…an!" He sounded a bit upset. I still don't have a clue to what he was asking.

"It's…jam…" Grimm yelled.

"ECCM! Restore communication link!" The radio was back online.

"Edge you read me?" I asked.

"Yeah, it's clear now."

"Man I swear, that was getting me nervous with radar out," Chopper said.

"We need to take out the other jammer aircraft before that happens again," Grimm said.

"Tally-ho," Nagase said. She already a had visual on the next craft. She was a step ahead on me.

"There it is. I can see it too." Chopper said, "How 'bout you let us take the next two jammer craft. Whataya say Kid?"

"Go ahead. Jus be quick about. Edge and I will give you cover," I responded.

"Alright let's kick some ass Grimm." Nagase went low to keep the escorts occupied. It wasn't that hard really. With radar jamming even the Yukes weren't willing to engage. They just wanted to keep us away from the transport planes instead of shooting us down. It was bad decision at least from my point. Once the E-767's were shot down they would have real problem on their hands. However, so were we about that time of the mission.

"The Osean planes are firing on a school packed with civilians! They're at the engineering college!" The Yuke solider said amid sounds of explosions distorted in the background. I almost jumped in my seat. Attacking the civilian college? Were they talking about us?

"Whoever is violating orders, cease fire immediately?" Thunderhead said. The warning alarm went off in my cockpit.

"What idiots are doing that?" Chopper responded quite appropriately. I rolled right pulled the stick. I could just barely see him in the canopy.

"Attention units operating in sector Charlie Omega. Attacks on civilians are forbidden!"

"That's right near us," Grimm said.

"Hell that's where we're supposed to be operating. You see those idiots anywhere?" Chopper responded.

"uh…No joy. I don't see a thing and my radars clean too"

"This is Edge. I'm not showing aircraft like that either. Are you sure?" Thunderhead didn't respond. No doubt the AWACS was in blurry exchange of communications with high command. I could almost hear the blame that was going to be put on us. That unit though. That number. They must have been the ones. They were no other Osean squadrons in the area.

"Well fine don't answer the lady Thunder-block-head," Chopper said resentfully.

"Knock it off. We need to shoot down the rest of jammer aircraft," I said trying not to show any worry in any voice. The truth is I was angry, at what I'm sure. I felt the same the morning, frustrated at myself. Why was this happening to me? Why was I failing?

We split up into two attack wings each taking one of the two remaining E-767. It wasn't that hard. The ironic thing about the whole mission is that the attack on the civilians actually made a difference for us. It would have been much harder to have gotten past the escorts in not for it. Some on the enemy fighters started to leave to area, heading toward the college, presumably to shoot down the attacking plane. The jammers were shot down and we began to destroy the transport.

"This is Thunderhead, Wardog did you engage in an attack on a civilian facility?" I was tempted to say yes because the absurdity of the question.

"No…" I almost yelled at him, but it wouldn't have helped anything.

"Roger. So you're sure you didn't do this?" He had to press it.

"Why would we do that? Weren't you watching from up there?" Chopper asked. We were almost done. Most of the transport by that was shot down the rest in heavy retreat. "That's what I hate about war. No matter who starts it always comes this!"

"I have tone Captain. Fox 2, Fox 2." Grimm shot down the last of the transport. It would have felt good under different circumstances.

"Last plane confirmed shot down all transports and jammers in the local airspace have been eliminated." Thunderhead said.

So it was. If only we knew back then, it would have made it a lot easier. It was mission accomplished but we might as well have failed with the reception the commander gave us upon return. We were directed to report to Central Command HQ in Oured, the capital. It was going my first time there.


	16. In the Name of Justice

Fire

"What do you think Blaze? It's nice huh," Bartlett said, fixing the frame on the wall.

There was a faint roar. A lion in the distance…

"Blaze huh, that's a good name," Pops said oiling the bearing.

"Blaze I am sure you have met Kei in the four years you spent here."

"I haven't." I was lying. I had seen her before. Several times. I could never admit it though.

It was louder that roar, that power…

"Your eyes are very beautiful. It's like they are on fire."

"Blaze…what kind of name is that? You must have had an interesting mother kid?" He turned away from me. I would call him Chopper.

"Blaze."

The roar was getting louder. The demon staling me down. The crimson eyes in the darkness…a falling needle…

"Hey kid."

Something seemed to kick me in the ribs, giving me a violent push back to consciousness. The roar of the engines suddenly seemed deafening, much louder than they had been when I first had boarded that plane. Chopper had been hitting me in the side, and kept doing it even as I groaningly came out of me sleep. That explains the violent push back to life. "Kid wake up!" he was yelling over the noise. "We're almost there." My head hurt, it probably was just from falling asleep against a metal bar, or maybe it was the destination. It was a C-5 galaxy. The same model as Mother Goose One. I'm sure that one was a bit more luxurious. There wasn't any furniture on this one, beside fro, the folding canvass "seats" they kept on the sides. Some of the most uncomfortable creations in the world. I felt very sorry for the Special Forces at that moment.

I felt a soft hand grab my wrist that moment. I turned my head to my left to fall into Nagase's brown eyes. "You okay?" she asked just loud enough for me to hear her over the engines. She obviously was referring to my expression or my aches from the falling asleep against the metal bar.

"I'm fine," I said. And I guess I was for most part, at least in my head. In realty who knows how I was, or how any of us were. We weren't alone on the trip though. Genette had managed to pull some favors in to come along with us. When I asked him why, he only told me that he had to keep covering the story, our story. Some story it was going to be though. A brilliant end for the four leading pilots of the war. We had some luck up to that point. Whether that luck was good or bad was in the eye of the beholder. Whether our short careers were anything remarkable was in the eyes of the world. I had the feeling that all of us were going to lose our careers at this moment. Maybe I was being pessimistic, but it wasn't looking good at that point.

It's rough touch down on C-5. You think with the size of the plane and the stability it wouldn't shake so much. You think it might behave somewhat like a passenger aircraft. We could hear a feel the gear lower, click and lock. We could feel and hear the flaps rise. And we could really feel the airspeed lower. But what was all this for four fighter pilots. The only one who was a bit shaken was Genette. He had been trying to film our perilous flight, but he a hard enough time just holding onto his camera. I wondered for a moment how the story would look once it was over. I had such a doomed outlook I almost feel ashamed about it now.

We had flown from Sand Island on the C-5 to Bradford Air Force Base. The base itself was piece of history. It had been established back in 1943, one of the first airbases every built in the world, back in the days when the air force was still apart of the Osean Army. Over the years and especially after the Belkan War it fallen into disarray. With the world moving toward peace there wasn't much point it keeping huge number of bases in operation. Especially one that was meant to keep an eye on Leasath, when they had control of that part of the world. If not for the war with Yuktobania, the base probably would have been closed within the year. Not anymore.

The massive door of the C-5 creaked as they opened letting the daylight into the very dark cargo hold. I had to shield my eyes as we walked out, like a bear coming out of hibernation. It's very disorienting, only the C-5 airmen didn't seem affected by it. I wonder how many trips they had made in the course of that war.

"We're here sir. Bradford Air Force Base." A crewman said we disembarked carrying our scarce luggage. Genette had the least out of all us surprisingly. For some reason I had thought he would have the most. Bradford but it wasn't much of a base anymore. There dozens of hangars, more than on Sand Island but they were easily decades old, brown and yellow from time passing. There were hardly any planes in the entire airfield. Those that were there, were mostly older B-52 bombers. None of them had even see combat yet. I had heard that had kept some of the B-2's there. The stealth bombers, but if they were there they were out of sight. The Base Commander there probably wouldn't have stand for us to see them.

I stepped off the ramp of the C-5. Breathing deeply to gather whatever strength I had. "Sir," the airmen had said to me. It surprised me. I thought he would be glad to kick us off the plane. "Whatever it's worth sir, we believe you guys." We, I looked into the cargo hold, to the faint white light at the end were the cockpit is. I could make out someone saluting us. I didn't really know what to say.

"Thanks." Chopper said rather nonchalantly.

"We really appreciate it." Nagase said.

"Thank you," Grimm said.

I looked at him through glasses. He was sincere. If only it could come from the top brass. "Take care." I said saluting him which he returned.

"You too sir." I had heard the click of a shutter. Genette had taken a picture of the event. There was one positive to hat trip.

We were all fatigued from the flight, even me who had slept somewhat. On top of that, we hadn't gotten much rest after the sortie over Dresdene. Immediately after we landed we received orders to report to Central Command. Even Genette could have used some rest at the base. But as soon as were off the runway there were MP's waiting to take us on the nearly five hour car ride into Oured. It was just tow military SUV's with the four MP it looked like we were under arrest.

"Well they pulled out all the stops for us this time. Eh kid? Yeah we're getting the royal treatment now. Man I swear." Chopper said. One of the MPs whispered to another. Why was this so important?

"Is it that unusual? They think you're responsible for killing innocent civilians," Genette reminded us.

"Don't worry I haven't forgotten," Chopper responded.

"But it was that other squadron. They know that. Right? Lt. Nagase?" Grimm said hesitantly.

"Maybe. Since they called us from the front lines here…" She sounded as bad as I did. All of us gauged the brass by our own base commander. Which if we were right meant some harsh words and some prejudice. They had such suspicion, such fear of espionage. They would suspect us, Captain Bartlett's nuggets of anything. So rational.

"Relax Grimm. Let's get going." The MP's weren't as courteous as the boys on the transport, but they treated us well enough I guess. When were the MP's ever that polite, even to superior officers? We were split into two and three. Nagase, Grimm, and Genette one of the vehicle while Chopper and myself were shuffled into the other.

"Good afternoon Sir." The MP in the front passenger turned around to face me. He seemed somewhat nonchalant. Form the expression on his face, I have thought he was actually having a good day escorting us in for our "hearing" at the capital. In some ways he reminded me of Bartlett, apart from the fact he was at least a decade younger. "Sergeant Marrow." He made a small salute. I just stared, not feeling any desire to show any warmth to him. "I'll be…escorting you during your squad's visit here. I understand most of you have never been to the Capital, and, ergo, Central." He looked for some reaction from me, like he was expecting some backlash.

"How nice of you…" Chopper said. "Geeze, last time I was here I was on vacation." The Sergeant didn't have any reaction. Just kept the same calm expression on his face, just as though it was a painting.

"I'll be available if you have any questions. We'll be arriving in Oured about 1950 this evening, but I'm afraid your hearing isn't until tomorrow morning at 0830."

"So what are we expected to do in that time?" I asked superfluously. I didn't care about the answer. I just wanted to bother him. He took his of Chopper fixing in on mine.

"I wouldn't to tell you that, sir. Just be ready to leave by 0730 in the morning. And under no circumstances are you to go anywhere without my okay. That's my orders sir." He turned away, pulling out a small notebook from his pocket and settling himself into the seat. The other MP entered the care and started the engines. So quiet compared to the hornet.

"Where are we staying? At Central?" I asked.

"There's no lodging at Central sir. I'm told High Command has reserved rooms for you and you team at the Golden Dawn. It's a hotel near the bay…" He said and then became absorbed in his book.

"Hey I know that hotel…five stars, stellar view of the bay, a nice lounge and bar in the lobby…wow. Hey I called it Blaze, we're getting the royal treatment this time around," Chopper remarked, trying to ease the ice like tension. I didn't really like this man. Somehow I felt I was in competition with him. Like he was a competitor with me in race, a race without a finish.

South Osean country is actually quite beautiful, I have to admit. I was so used to the tropical climates or the colder Northern Cliamte where I grew up. It was certainly different to be in a temperate zone. Not inescapably hot or humid like Sand Island, or constantly gloomy and chilled like my supposed "childhood home." It was just comfortable. That's best way I can describe it. No need to strip down, or a heavy coat to walk outside. I could see why some sixty percent of Osean's population chose to live there. I feel asleep not lone after the car ride began, watching the fissures in the road race by in the transcendence of time.

"We're getting the royal treatment now kid." I kept hearing Chopper say that. Why were getting treated to a nice hotel for lodging? Wasn't that unusual? Wasn't there any near by base that would throw us into an unused barracks? If they suspected us of treason why show any kindness? Were there actually some that respected what we had done? Any that saw our value in the destruction of the Scinfaxi?

The sword lodged in the invulnerable tree. The innocent blood that fell down the blade…

I felt the glass pressed against my head and an annoying hand trying to shake me back into reality. "Kid, Get up! You've been out for almost four hours now." He removed his hand and I finally opened eyes, suspension cable passing before the backdrop of blue water. The fiery glint of the suns last burn shown in my eyes as it disappeared before the horizon. I realized I was staring past through the side of the Oured Bay Bridge. It must have been near 1900 hours, twilight. It was surprisingly bright for that time of year. "It's nice isn't it? Man, I used to love coming here as a kid. It'd be great if all this wasn't going on." He stopped for a moment watching the scenery. "Hey Blaze, it's your first time here right?"

He sounded serious. "Yeah," I said. I remembered my high school history class, the white columns that surrounded the Presidential Residence.

"Geeze. Kinda sucks to come to the Capital on that note, huh?"

"Yeah." I looked to our Sergeant Marrow. Still absorbed in his reading. He must have felt my eyes upon him because he soon came out of it and looked me in the eye.

"Sir…we'll be in there in about ten minutes. I hope you found the car relaxing. Bell status…" He said into hand radio.

I began to feel how sore my neck was from sleeping like that for that period of time. I felt like someone had taken a ball point hammer to the side of hand, a pounding grogginess that didn't dissipate for several minutes. I was still alright to get a good look of the capital in the endless incandescence of twilight.

There were no intermediary stops through the entire ride. A short pass through the down town metropolitan area, then straight to the Bay. I had never heard of the Golden Dawn Hotel. Then again I had heard of hardly anything on that side of Osea, or that side of the world. Sand Island, it wad the only place I really had ties to at that time. As for the rest of the world it might as well have been dead. We arrived at the Golden Dawn exactly ten minutes after I had woken. Just as our Sergeant Marrow said we would. We had hardly any baggage so it was a quick unload before we were in the hotel and sitting in the lounge. Marrow was the only one of the MP's that stayed, the others driving off into oblivion in the military SUV's.

"0730 is the time we have to leave. I'll be around to all your rooms at 0700 prompt. Please be ready. You're free to wonder anywhere you want within the confines of the hotel of course. Please don't leave the confines under any circumstances. Any attempt to do so can and will be considered desertion." He looked at me, a challenging cat to a dog. "Other than that please enjoy yourself Lt. Arré. This bar actually has some fantastic margaritas." With that comment he exited the lobby, into our "forbidden zone."

"Where are you going Sergeant?" Chopper called after him.

"I have some business to attend to sir."

"Oh really? And what kind of business is that?" Chopper responded.

"Good business, sir." We didn't see him again for the rest of the night.

There was a moment of confusion and hesitation for all of us, sort of group pause where none of us were sure of the next course of action, whatever it could be. Genette was the one to finally say something. "Is it common for them to just…leave a suspected criminal squadron unescorted like this?"

"I wouldn't think so," I said, though in realty I had no insight into the practices of the Military Police.

"What did they put in here in the first place? Couldn't they have used a base for us…" Grimm said.

"They could and they didn't Grimm for obvious reasons." Chopper said, crossing his arms.

"You're saying that they want us to try and dissert?" Nagase asked Chopper.

"Yeah. I mean why else do this if they're really serious about convicting us? They just want another charge to pin of us." Chopper responded.

"That's…" Grimm searched for a word."

"Stupid?" I responded because it was the same thing I was thinking.

"Yeah…"

"True," Nagase commented.

"The fact is they won't trust you. Not as long as Captain Bartlett is still missing," Genette said.

"They think because he had a love affair with a Yuke reckon major that he jumped aboard that intelligence ship to betray the country, with what exactly? The Captain wasn't exactly well liked when he was here you know." Chopper remarked.

"It doesn't really matter, "Nagase began, throwing her gunny sack over her shoulder. "We still have to appear before Command tomorrow." She walked toward the lounge.

"…could you please stop reminding me of that?" Chopper said and followed her. Grimm watched me for a moment waiting to see what I was going to do before following Nagase and Chopper. I stayed for a moment starring through the glass doors of the hotel, watching another world pass me by. People going about heir business as though nothing was happening, as though we were officially still at peace. Did they even know we had invaded another country? Did they even care that a bunch of students at an engineering college had been killed by Osean planes? Or was the Administration using their influence to cover all of it up? Starring at another world like that, I felt much like ghost of a moment. I heard the click of a camera. I guess Genette though that would be a good photo of me for some reason. I didn't mind really.

"Are you worried about the hearings tomorrow?" He asked me.

"Not really."

"Nagase was saying…on the ride over here, that will put most of pressure on you. That doesn't worry you, the ramifications this will have for your career?"

"No. They think we did it. If they had proof they would have already arrest us."

"I see. So you think this is just show?"

"I don't know. I have always been taught to just do as I'm told and shut up about it. Yet somehow I still end up in all sorts of trouble." I picked up my bag, going to join everyone else.

"…about you and Lt. Nagase." A drumbeat through my senses. Why was this coming up? "You seem to be getting rather close."

"She's my wingman." I walked off quickly. Let him figure out the details.

We spent the evening casually, well as casual as we could considering the situation. It wasn't exactly a vacation atmosphere but the first opportunity at relaxation we had in several days. With everything that had happened, it seemed like a long time since the invasion, which in actuality was only three days prior. We tired to avoid the subject of the war, and related to it about the hearings to be commenced the next day. Thanks to Chopper we spent most of the time reminiscing about past trips to exotic places. Chopper had more stories about going to Usea, after the Continental War of course. Detailed accounts about the immense craters left here by the X1994 XF04 asteroids, he told, and too many stories of botched vacation cruises with Eurasian women. I didn't listen half the time. I got lost the very sweet alcoholic drinks they offered at the bar, discount prices for member of the military. Our Sergeant Marrow was right the margaritas were very good, strange since Oured Bay was anything but tropical.

I tired to look him in the eye, Chopper, as he said something. My eyes kept falling to the table. Beautiful mahogany, carved with angelic symbols, I wonder how much it cost since mahogany was illegal nowadays. "Why don't you say something to her?" It sounded like Lars. He was always one to try to spur my dating career.

"Always check your six. That's the single biggest thing that gets pilot killed."

"X1994, they caused huge amount of damage on the other continents. Now what can you all tell me what this means for the Osean Space Program?"

Time went on, and I said something regarding something else to everybody. I think Grimm was the first to head up followed by Chopper. I don't know what happened to Genette. I can't remember anything. Anyway I was almost ready to retire myself to sleep, if I could sleep. "It's only an interm, in the war without end." I think a teacher had said that me.

Nagase and I were left both of quite absolved in our won thoughts, lost among the yellow bricks of a golden path to oblivion. "Blaze," she said to me, "are you really not worried about this?"

Truth reined the words sincerity only reached through alcohol. "No."

She laughed a bit at it. "Yeah, I thought you were trying to save face."

"What face is there to save?" I said.

She laughed again. "True. I've tired to calm myself down the entire way here. I've tried to tell myself that I…we did nothing wrong…"

"You're doubting yourself."

She was silent for a moment. "It's stupid I guess. Why do I have to be so stupid?"

"Don't blame yourself. Everyone doubts themselves when they're faced with something like this. It's because we're afraid to be wrong," I remember my fear, my fear of telling them I didn't know my own name.

Nagase breathed deeply, then laid her head on the table. "I don't know. Maybe I'm just letting my feelings affect me?"

"I'm the same way." We didn't say anything for a moment. Nothing was needed to be said. We were just letting time stand for a moment, to just wait in our company while the world waits in a still paradox.

Nagase got up after a few minutes. "I need to sleep. I feel like I haven't in days."

"I'll be up soon." She left into the paradox and I tried to count sheep until I was sick of the night crowd in the lounge. A blue dove that calls for peace in the twilight, she was right. I did doubt myself. I doubted myself when commanded Wardog for the first time. I doubted myself when I chose to join the Osean Air Force Academy. I doubted myself when I chose my own name from a list. And I doubted myself then when I had to face my superiors in regards to the murder of innocents. I doubt the demon inside of me. I doubted my motivation then for flying in the first place. I blame Pops. I was caring too much about the War. I was caring too much about my contribution to the invasion. Yet I wouldn't stop, I wouldn't stop flying at my friends. I wouldn't stop for them. For hope…For Nagase.

To top the experience of, we had our own rooms. I could understand giving Nagase her own, being that she was the only female member of the squadron. But even Genette, for course his was probably paid for by other means besides the Air Force. They treated us nice, aces of Osea. I still even with the long missed privacy I still found myself lying awake in my bed. Maybe the insomnia was brought on by the stress of the next day? Maybe it brought on by the intermediate naps I had on the way there? Maybe I was finally at limit as a pilot. Pops had mentioned something about losing sleep. It often happened to pilots who've recently lost members in the sky. We had lost members, most of our squadron, almost all of our trainee team before the War began. We were Wardogs though, the most experienced pilots in the War. We should get over it. Easier said than done. I couldn't fall asleep and ended up dressing and wandering into the hall.

It was empty for the most part. It wasn't exactly vacation season to Oured. Compound that with the war and that made for very empty rooms, even those that had "stellar views of the bay" as Chopper put it once. The hall reflected that. I imagined Nagase sleeping soundly, comforted by something I didn't have. It was quiet, no one around except for me and one other. Our Sergeant Marrow was there, back from the business he had in Oured. He was sitting a couch, provided by the hotel for people who had to wait several minutes for taxed elevators. He was reading, making notes in that notebook he had when we had rode there earlier, earnestly studying. I resented him for it, for selfish reasons. I was targeting him for all the trouble Command was putting on us at that moment. Plus I was sleepless, annoyed, anxious and without anything else to do but bother him.

"Making sure we war criminals don't cheat justice?" I said, running my hand over my eyes.

"You're not war criminals." He said not even looking up from his work. He had two more books by him, and I walked over to get a better look at them. They we were textbooks, appearing as though they had been checked out from a public library. I read the title of one "Aeronautical Dynamics."

"Not yet maybe. You're here to make sure?"

"No. I'm here to do a job." He wrote some notes in the margin.

"I see…are you studying to become an engineer?

He stopped making notes. "Yeah, I am." He put done his book and looked me in the eye. "Of course, you probably thought this was my career of choice? Isn't that right?"

"No."

"What?"

"I didn't think about it all. You're one of the MP's. What else am I supposed to consider?"

"Maybe dreams huh? Maybe I have some ambition to besides you fighter pilots? Put that in your judgment."

"I haven't judged you at all."

"Of course you have. From the moment I met you at Bradford I was the brass' knuckle. I was the talking MP of the commanders that hate your guts."

"What else am I supposed to think about it? What else are we supposed to think about it?"

"Maybe you're supposed to be professional. Just maybe you can consider it's not us who are causing the trouble?"

"Maybe you are supposed to be professional? What the hell was the point of putting us here? You trying to promote the chances of us disserting? Was it your idea or the idea of your CO?"

"My idea."

"So you do think we did it?"

"No," he said tersely. I stared silently accusing him of lying, and he went back to his books and pulled some slip of paper, newspaper. "You think a person that wins a marathon skips out on the medal? Do think a celebrity ever avoids the praise of his fans?"

He handed it to me. It was article, about us. I thought it was Genette's the original one that got some acclaim in the military. It was different one, "The Four Wings continue to fly." I didn't have to read but first lines to get the point. It was praising us for our defense during the invasion, no mention of the incident at the engineering college. It was clipped out, wrinkled from sue as bookmark for his notebook. It didn't make any sense to me at the moment. I couldn't say anything.

"I made the call. I got the assignment as quote, 'to use all force and means necessary to ensure the presence of 108th Sand Island Detachment at Central Command in Oured on November 4, 2010." He took the article from me. "I'm studying to become an aeronautical engineer. I've realized in that what it takes to lead a successful squadron in combat. A commander with the integrity to do that wouldn't run from justice. He wouldn't run from bogus charges he knew he didn't commit. He wouldn't be a coward. He wouldn't need coercion. And he and his team would deserve far more than suspicion and deceit. The Dawn was my idea, yes. I thought burdened pilots like you could use a small amount of R&R. I thought you could enjoy the soft music and peace that I get when I'm here. Couldn't you include that in your judgment?" He was almost shouting but softy, like he didn't want to wake anyone. "Sorry."

He ran his hands through his hair, breathing deeply to calm his own nerves. I was awake he had woken me. I knew suddenly what I had been in the last few days. To him and to Nagase. There was little I could say, little that was right to say. "Thank you."

He sat back down trying to reestablish the mood he had before my intrusion. "The lounge is open by this time in morning. They actually serve very good cappuccinos if you can't sleep." I took him up on it, and left him to his studies.

It must have been around 0430 when I left my room and confronted Marrow in the hall. That means I had spent four and a half hours just rolling around in the hotel bed. It was enough to make me consume four of those cappuccinos before 0700. I still felt groggy despite all that to make me awake. Marrow was prompt at getting the rest of the squadron ready by the time he specified. By 0720 a very unhappy Sand Island Squadron was loaded into two SUV's, this time heading for Central Command.

0830. November 4th. It was day none of us would forget easily. It was a beautiful morning in the city. The sun shinning brightly on over the buildings gave a sense of peace, prosperity and the profusion of dreams. Still it wasn't going to change our attitudes. The closets any of us had ever been to a trial were the court room dramas that were prevalent on Osean television. We weren't on trial, but the difference to ourselves was no significant. It building we entered itself in design, neo-classical marble columns that had a history on their own. It would have been a great trip otherwise. Marrow was the first to exit the vehicles, talking with another stationed police before he waved us out of the cars. "Alright follow me. We're right on time. The hearing chambers are only a short walk away."

"…Great," Chopper said lowly.

"You should try not to think about it," Nagase suggested.

"That's kinda hard don't you think?" He responded. With a building as intimidating as the one we faced, we couldn't think about anything else. "Yeah, like anyone could think about anything else."

Justice, integrity, service. Those are the words edged upon the wall. Those are the words for witch the civilian and military arm of the justice exist. Those are the words for which we served as members of the military. Those are words we heard upon. Those are words we judged upon as breakers. Those are the words were held against as traitors.

The military hall of justice had many halls, unique since there were very few courts that served only to the military, only on military matters. It was rare for anyone to see the building from inside on the whole. One room was converted to ear our matters. Since it wasn't a trial, there wasn't a need for any representation. It was just us, Wardog, and the three officers who would be serving as our judges. They weren't all from the Air Force, the only colonel on the board was. The other two were a Navy Admiral and an Army General, as to provide impartiality to or case, if tat was possible. Matters of massacre can never be free of bias.

They heard us one by one. Calling Nagase first then Grimm. Chopper went third and they saved me, the "Captain". I wonder what the logic was in that. Wouldn't they want me to go first? Wouldn't want the opening story from the commander's point of view and see how his subordinates followed it? Was it special, only for us? Or was this the common procedure? I sat outside wondering about that the entire. Genette was with me but neither of us was in the mood to talk. He had tried to get his camera in, but they wouldn't allow it. Justice I guess was too fickle to be photographed.

There was a bit of an uproar just before Chopper exited the room. He apparently let his anger get control of him and cursed at the sitting officers. Not smart, but I wasn't going to do anything about it. In hindsight I might have done the same thing, had that Army General said that to me. Chopper walked out in the violent motion of a tornado, sitting down before I had even stood to enter.

I was escorted by one of the sergeant at arms that stood at the door. The room was large and cold, it hadn't been used in quite some time. The was an open stand, squared cage for which we testified at the center, and the enclosing bar before that. At the head sat our judges, our guardians of honor for the military. They didn't even look at me as I entered, just kept their noses down, shifting more waves of documents each with the official Osean in upper hand corner. There was one recorder, who despite his job was not busy at the time. There was no chair for me t sit, so there I was. Standing at attention before the eyes of Solomon.

"First Lt. Blaze Arré," even the way the Army said it seemed accusatory, "we've heard at length from the rest of your squadron regarding this matter." He paused, peering down at me through low set spectacles. "Do you understand this, Lieutenant?"

No I didn't. "Yes sir."

He nodded slowly, bringing his hands together and leaning back in his chair. "So then you know, clearly, why you are here in Oured on this day?"

"Yes sir."

He nodded slowly, looking away up and too the left and then back at me. I felt like I was confirming my guilt. I felt like all had just been set in stone the moment they had spoken to us. "The seal on the courthouse front…did you see it when you entered Lieutenant?"

"I did see it, sir."

"I'm glad Lieutenant. It has great meaning for us soldiers." He leaned forward, staring at me ever more sternly. "Do you understand what that meaning is Lieutenant?"

I could guess what he thought it was. I could guess what I was supposed to say. But that's not what I would say. "I don't sir."

"Oh…" He nodded, expectance he had. "Justice, integrity, service. It's what we strive for in these rooms. It's what we strive for when we conduct a war. It's what we strive for when fly in the sky Lieutenant." He sat back again, yet folding his hands. "It's what we strive for when we question you. And it's what you should strive for when yielding us your answers."

The Navy Admiral who had watched it like a drama in the theater suddenly became audible. "Please. You can't expect this farfetched story to fly. Integrity do you have it, Blaze?" He said my name mockingly. "Do you have the guts to stand up to it?"

I waited a moment. Anyone could see where it was going. Whatever I thought to say before then was out the window. "I think I do sir."

"Really," it sounded like a bullet from a gun. "Your team sure didn't."

The Admiral went to say something more but the General stopped him with the slight raise of his hand. "Lieutenant, it has been said before this board, that a Yuktobanian engineering college with no military affiliation was attacked by an Osean group whose number is 8492?"

"That is what happened sir."

The Admiral was hot under the collar again. "And does it not trouble…actually does it not seem unfathomable to you that there is no unit…aerial, ground unit, with that number in our military?"

I didn't want to say anything. It could only make things worse. "Answer the question Lieutenant!"

"I don't know sir."

"You don't know…" The Admiral said but he was drowned out. The Air Force Colonel who had said nothing, hardly even looked at me through the opening questions was finally speaking.

"If you will excuse me Admiral. Lt. Blaze, it has been said that your squad heard the 8492 group over the radio yes?"

"Yes sir."

"Did they ever say thy were an Osean Squadron?" My mood suddenly lifted. He seemed genuine, a true JAG interested in truth.

"They did not sir."

He sat back shaking his had a bit and spreading his arms wide. "Well did you see the said squadron? Did you get a good look at their insignias?"

"No sir."

"So you can't be sure that the 8492nd you heard on the radio was indeed part of our forces?" He was a true defender, our only representation.

"I can't sir."

He have an expression to his two older colleges, it suggested that truth had been revealed, guilt in doubt. The Admiral was furious, while the General kept his clam demeanor. "That is…preposterous. Are you suggesting that the Yukes attacked their own people?" He was talking to the Colonel now.

"I said nothing of the short. I am merely establishing the facts at hand. All we have in this matter is the testimony of the 108th Sand Island Detachment in regards to this tragedy."

"That's true," the General was speaking still calm and collected as if he knew the facts of the world, "but more to the point that we continue this hearing."

"And believe we shall gentlemen. But… and I believe even you Admiral will agree with me. We have exhausted this witness. I move that we dismiss him back to his duties."

"No…" The Admiral was yelling then. I think he was talking like a sailor but all his words were drowned out by the sound of an alarm through the hall of justice.

-I meant to include the Apito Airport incident. But this was getting a little bit long.

-Stonehenge


	17. Chain Reaction

Fire

I remember once riding my motorcycle full throttle around a blind corner, and there was a truck coming head on…

It was unexpected, but not at all unwelcome. I didn't know what the alarm was about but I was looking for any distraction from that hearing. I tired not to react, trying to stand as austere as possible before the tribunal, though I must say I did silently enjoy the frustration of the Admiral as he tired to compete with resonating siren that deafened the hall. He yelled something inaudible to guard over my left shoulder. The guard certainly didn't hear him but he knew enough from the body language to the call the Central Command HQ.

Before I knew anything else, the door behind me opened and the alarm deactivated. I turned around, spying Grimm in the corner of my eye standing just outside. It was our own Sergeant Marrow that had barged. The brass behind me weren't about to suffer any of it. "What is the meaning of this Sergeant?" The Colonel asked.

"I'm sorry sir. A state of emergency has been declared. And I have orders to take the Sand Island Squadron to Capital Air Command immediately."

"What? What's happened?" The Admiral exclaimed, almost slamming his fist into the deck.

"Sir, there's a situation at the Apito International Airport," the Sergeant replied.

"A situation?" the Air Force Colonel said. "Why does Command want the Wardog Squadron?"

"I don't know Colonel. But I have my orders."

The Colonel twitted a pen in his fingers, almost like there was nothing at stake, "Alright, if there are no objections?" He looked to the General, who simply nodded without looking at the Colonel. The Admiral gave him harsh stare revealing his protest and didn't say anything. "You're dismissed Lieutenant. This hearing is concluded."

A prisoner serving dual life sentences couldn't have been happier than I was then. Marrow waited for me to catch up to him before turning with me to leave. A man who I had resented at first, he suddenly seemed more a friend than the escorting member of the military police. Ironic considering the position I was in. "What's going on?" I asked him, thinking that perhaps he did know something he had forgotten to reveal to the panel of supreme justice behind me.

"Honestly sir I am not exactly sure. You're team has already left ahead of you." He reached into his jacket thumbing through one of his pockets. "Room 115A. 115A, got it? It should be…"

There were two corridors we went through, like veil into hell since we encountered a sort of pandemonium. I had never seen so many staff officers in hurry. Colonels, Majors, Brig. Generals, even two and three stars were running through the maze of corridors so disorganized I would compare them to rats if I were to compare them. I remarked to Sergeant Marrow, "All this over an air strike?"

"There's more going on."

Airmen carrying some documents brushed passed me. He looked back. Maybe he was going to apologies. As soon as he saw me he looked away and rushed off. Marrow noticed, but didn't say anything.

"It's already 1830. They spent almost seven hours to question your team." He stopped, looked right down the intersecting corridor. "It's down there. I think. I don't actually work here." He stood at attention and saluted.

Is how it is with everyone? Does everyone's duty conflict with there beliefs. I still don't know.

I saluted. "Thanks for taking care of us, Sergeant."

"Just get through this war alive, Captain Wardog." He about faced and walked down a path of justice.

There wasn't anything special about the room we had been sent to. I think it must have gone out of use during the years of peace. It had the air of being and old command office, but then it was packed with old desk computers and boxes full of stationary. It had suddenly become a top secret briefing room for the Wardog Squadron.

They were already there. Grimm had a look of relief on his face, Nagase seemed almost distressed. Chopper was the only one that said anything when I entered. "Yo Kid, we genuinely thought they had just shot you when you walked in there. Considering the pounding we took."

"They didn't like ending the hearing that quickly," I said. I sublime feeling of relief finding my friends. But it went away quickly when I saw the other three in the room.

"Well you're nothing but prompt Wardog leader. Anyway there's no time to chat." There was no where to sit either, so I ended up leaning against one of the tables next to Chopper. _He_ was an Air Force Lt. Colonel, a top advisor at HQ, to top that off. He didn't bother to give us his name, not that we cared to know it either. "We've got a situation here. Our armies are bogged down with the Yuktobanian Invasion. So we're sort on operational aircraft. Unfortunately, as a result we're going to have to ask you 'flying aces' take off for us. So how about it? Which mission would you like to take on? That's right. There's more than one attack threatening the capital right now. How bout we this to decide."

He had quarter in hand. A quarter? If I tired I could come up with some more irrelevant. If there was a threat even more than one we sortie for both. We knew what we were doing. But we had to play along.

"What?" Chopper said.

"What are the choices?" Nagase asked. Chopper exclaimed again.

"Heads or tails of course."

"Well that explains everything." I said letting my resentment show.

"It makes things interesting. Call it Captain!" I heard the ring of metal as the quarter left his fingers. I saw the light flash over its spinning surface. The faint engraving of the word truth came out into absurdity. Call what though? We had no choices yet I was still being asked to choose? One or two. Heads or tails? Black or white? Was I really choosing?

"Heads."

The coin landed on the floor bounced once, twice, then had enough momentum to go into a side spin. Slowing and slowing till it finally came to a stop. It was heads. Truth won and the flip side was nigh a mystery.

"Okay that makes it easy. We'll just give you aces the harder one."

"I thought we won the toss?" Grimm asked.

"You did. So here's the prize…"

Surprises were becoming typical in this war. Our squadron destroyed…a super-sub-carrier capable off long range burst missiles appeared from the depths…two attacks on our own base and the subsequent invasion of our "ally" Yuktobania. All this happened in only three months after fifteen years of peace.

The sitrep was this: unidentified hostiles have penetrated Osean airspace and were enroute to Apito International Air Port. Since most of all Osea's combat strength was in Yuktobania there where very few squadrons available to make the intercept. So naturally, despite accusations of war crimes, the 108th Sand Island Detachment was called to action. Simple right? Yet I still felt like there some deceiving tactic behind our deployment. I was beginning to distrust my own leadership.

"How?" I said.

"What was that Lieutenant?"

"How did they breach our Air Defenses? Ingress so far inland before we noticed them?"

"Well that's the six million dollar question. Why don't you tell us after you shoot 'em all down? It's besides the point anyway. We cannot allow them to penetrate any farther inland or attack the airport. This is a real emergency. And we need you at the top of your game. But I'm sure the Four Wings of Sand Island can handle a handful of Yuke fighters." One of the aids beside him whispered something in his ear. "No time like the present. There's transportation outside waiting for you. It will take you to Oured Naval Facility. The base commander has been nice enough to lend you four of his F-18's. The same model you've been flying." He then walked out door, shouting back a haft-hearted "good luck."

I remember once riding my motorcycle around a blind corner at full throttle. I had a habit of pushing sharp turns. And there was a truck coming head on. The horn blared and I panicked, my mind possessed by the paralyzing thought that I was going to die…

There really wasn't any time to waste, and High Command knew that. So instead of ground transport we had a nice marine huey fly in from the Naval base. First time I had been in helicopter. It was horrible standing on the pad while it touched down. The blades subsequently created a windstorm of leaves, trash, dust and any piece of crap that happened to be on the roof. And honestly the flight just felt static, and the helicopter unyielding compared to fixed wing fighters. First time on a helicopter…

We only had about five minutes in the air to enjoy a great view of the Oured Bay sunset. Despite the noise and the fact we had an imminent intercept mission it looked beautiful, a constant in the world that was becoming increasingly amorphous. Nagase seemed to enjoy it much more than I did. I wonder, did I just have more on my mind? Or was I just seeing my own shadow lurk behind me?

"Your team sure didn't." That's what they said.

"Justice, integrity, service." That's what they said.

Someone once said, "Real political power comes through the barrel of gun."

I wish I had a gun at that moment.

Someone once said, "You can't forcibly change someone's beliefs."

I would have tried.

Landing. It was a pristine location for an air base. Almost as nice as Sand Island. But having the entire Capital of Osea gave a soldier plenty of things to do. There was no time to enjoy the view this time. The base crew chief walked out from his duties to meet us.

"Welcome sir!" He had to scream over the rotors of the chopper. They just aren't as elegant as fighters are. "Your aircraft are ready and waiting." The chopper was beginning to take off and kicked twice as much dust into our eyes compared to when it landed. "The prep room is this way. We've gotten everything ready for ya!"

"Thanks!" The noise began to die off as the copter got farther away. It was then that I noticed all the other people that had shone up when we disembarked from they helicopter. Pilots, crewman, petty officers, sailors, there was a whole multiplicity of navy there. I remembered that C-5 crewman when he saw us off only a day before. He wished us well when I would have written our death certificates. They were doing the same. There was a real dichotomy I suppose; command versus the soldiers. Did they know we were Air Force?

"We're very proud to serve with you guys," the crew chief said and walked briskly toward the hangars.

"Well," Chopper was saying. "Looks like they like us too."

"Maybe they can tell the top brass that?" Grimm remarked.

I could see our planes from the landing. Despite the word "NAVY" they were exactly the same as our birds back home at Sand Islands. Just like back at Sand Island, there were sea gulls crapping all over them. It was familiar and alien, a duplicity that was surrounding everything in our world at that point. We could only see one face of the coin at the time. What secrets does the back hold?

We didn't have our usual briefing. We didn't know the enemy strength or the enemy's numbers. Yet I still felt the comradely of champions. And I saw it in her eyes, the earth color of eternity. We would do this.

Getting back into the cockpit was a "coming home" from the harassment of our superiors. Maybe that's why Chopper couldn't keep his mouth shut.

"I'm taxing to launch," he said over the radio.

"I'm behind ya," Grimm said.

"I still can't believe we flipped a coin for this. This isn't funny man!" Chopper said. I sort of wanted to echo it.

"This is Capital District Air Command. Get used to my voice. I'll be directing you on this sortie. Now cut the chatter and get air borne. Eight bandits are inbound and heading for the Apito Airport. You must intercept them before get there." At least then we knew something concerning the mission. There were only four of us but we've beaten those odds before. "Do you understand this Wardog Leader?"

"Sure thing. We'll stop them sir."

"See. You heard our Captain, we'll take care of it," Chopper rebuffed.

"Second Lieutenant Davenport, we've heard from the frontlines that you like to shoot your mouth off on the radio…" Capital Air Command said.

"Ah…Davenport is too busy with his mission to respond to you at this time sir." That was kind of funny, actually.

Chopper hit the throttle, and I saw his plane surge forward like a falcon on the runway. Grimm took off, so close that he pretty much rode Chopper's exhaust into the sky. Nagase was next. "I'm clear. Launching!"

Check green, nothing was wrong. "Blaze you are cleared for launch." The thought occurred to me again as I was thrown back in my seat during take off. How did the Yukes ingress into our airspace so easily. And there had to have been other squadrons out there for this intercept. Or was Command simply playing a game with the Sand Island Squadron?

"Blaze launching."

I remember once riding my motorcycle full throttle around a blind corner, and there was a truck coming head on…

I put my landing gear up then raised altitude to fly on Edge's wing. Usually then we could count on a nice calm flight to the engagement area. Not this time.

"This is Wardog 1, everyone okay?" I asked.

"Roger that kid. Let's get going before the enemy reaches the airport," Chopper said. We didn't have a lot of time. The Yukes may even reach the airport airspace before us. Perfect…

"Capital Air Command to Wardog. Bogeys at vector 196. Intercept them before they reach the airport."

"Roger that Command," I said sort of heavily. I was getting tired of following his orders already.

"We need to fly full throttle to get there in time." Edge said.

"If we do that we won't have that much fuel to do anything. What if there are more fighters inbound we don't know about?" Chopper commented. I agreed, but there wasn't any other option.

"Good thing we're flying to an airport then." Grimm observed keenly.

"Very funny Grimm," Chopper rebuked.

"Alright then, proceeding to Apito Airspace. Everyone increase throttle in three…two…one…"

It was dark as hell. The moon partially lit the airspace but it wasn't much. This worried me. I could imagine one of our missiles going stray and hitting an ABS 747. I could see a hundred people losing there lives that didn't have to. Or did they? I didn't want to think about that. We didn't attack them in Yuktobania, but someone in Osea had. I guess it is only polite to respond in kind.

"Tally ho, I have them on the IFF," I said after what seemed only a few minutes of flight. Eight craft. They were flying a perfect double formation toward our airport. What were they thinking?

"I have them too, kid. Eight targets heading 270. There gunning' for the airport," Chopper reported.

"You think they're going to shoot down civilian planes?" Grimm asked over the radio.

"Who knows, but we have to stop before they reach the airport," Nagase said. I had a sinking feeling that there was more going on.

I scanned the horizon. Nothing I could see except the distant lights of Apito, all the people that were about to be pleasantly surprised. But what else could I do? There was one good thing though. I could barely make out the shoreline in the distance. We had a minute to intercept, at which we would be over a large lake next to the city. "Okay. We'll in range soon. Let's try to shoot them down over the lake before they reach the airport."

Grimm came on the channel, "That's perfect. If we do that, we'll avoid any civilian casualties."

"Sounds good to me captain. I'm all for it," Chopper said.

"We won't have much time. We'll have to shoot them down quickly before they reach the airport," Nagase said.

"Alright. Let's do it," I said, avoiding any sound of concern. But that guy Mobius One couldn't shoot down eight bandits in that sort of time. So…could we?

Not a moment later we were in range. Wardog engage. From the distance the bandits didn't look like more than dots flying at supersonic speeds. They didn't react at all for a moment. Maybe they wanted to get as close to the city as possible to avoid our counter attack? That didn't last long though.

"Dammit, this is Chopper; four of them are breaking off heading our way. The others are heading toward the airport."

"We can't let them get in range. Edge and I will take care of them. Archer, Chopper, you both keep on the other group," I ordered.

"Roger that Captain."

"Watch your six guys. We're fighting two on one."

"No sweat kid. We've done this before. Chopper engaging." We broke off flying toward the radar contacts on the IFF. Four on two, never the best odds to engage. It goes against not only common sense but the rules of engagement we played by. At the least the rules that Pop had championed. If you don't have the advantage it's best to abort. However, that wasn't an option when civilians were involved. I made out two of them coming head on. And the other two were coming around to bounce us from behind.

"Edge, let's hit the throttle. Pass over these guys and come at them from behind."

"Roger that Blaze."

It reminded of when I engaged enemy craft, when those leakers crossed the Ceres Ocean to cover there spy plane. That was only few days before the War began. The warning alarm activated in the cockpit as there radar a spiked us, and firefly-like tracer fire as they tried to shoot us down with their guns. I saw a spark from Nagase's plane and my gut leaped with panic. "Edge you alright?"

"I'm fine. I took some hits but it's nothing serious."

"Switch to sidewinders. We'll take these guys up close and personal. Ready go!"

I hit the throttle yet again, pulling the stick and fleeing the force crush my body into the seat as my hornet arced for the sky. It never felt good, but by that time had come to enjoy the g forces of air combat. "Dammit I can't see. Someone check my six." One shouted over the radio. I checked the IFF, two bogeys right in front of us. Which meant the others we high or incoming on our six. This is why you don't fight two on one not in your favor. I had one spike and I was coming at him with so much speed he didn't have much time to pull away. The sight on the HUD went red, and Fox 2. And his plane was trailing a line of fire.

"This is Blaze. Splash one!" I looked to my left, and my wingman wasn't there. The IFF showed her position. How the hell did she get so far away? "Edge what's your status?"

"I've almost got a shot. I just need a few seconds." I looked down at the IFF and found the other two bogeys, hot on her six. "Edge, they're on you. Hang tight I'll clear your six'o'clock." I suddenly thought of the other two in our group. "Chopper, Grimm what's your status?"

"Since you want to know we're in a big fur ball with these guys. It'd be really great of ya' to lead a hand. Aw dammit," Chopper said.

"Chopper! Missile on your six!" Grimm yelled.

"I know that! Don't worry. I can dodge this one."

If this kept up we wouldn't be around for Air Command to put any blame on us. These weren't rookie pilot we had blown through over Yuktobania.

I pulled up high, trying to get a better picture of bogeys. Small in the distance but I could still make them out against the light of city, making them appear like black ravens in the distance. I wonder what squadron they were? Their planes were older type MiG-31 Foxhounds. I didn't think I'd see any of those flying killers still in the skies. Too bad they didn't see me sooner; they would have flown a little longer.

"Oh shit! We're spiked! He's on our six!"

"Then break off and take care of him. We can't let them have air superiority."

Too late.

I had two sparrow locked on, with a better shot than I was used too when in a dogfight. "Blaze Fox 1, Fox 1!" Like two fireflies. Direct hit and both of their MiG's disengaged. It looked beautiful in the night. "You're clear."

"Alright Edge Fox 2!" The missile erupted from her wing, flying hell bent toward the MiG's engines burning hot trying to evade. Explosion and the wing trailed smoke until the pilot ejected.

"Nice kill Edge."

"Nice kill yourself Blaze. That was some amazing shooting."

"Aw dammit! Kid, Nagase get over here! Three of them got away and are headed toward the airport!" Chopper yelled.

"Pursue them. We'll meet with you over the airport." That was bad. Those three MiG-31's had enough ordinance to rip through all the civilian planes in the air. I was seeing the Port of St. Hewlett all over the tarmac of Apito. The IFF wasn't indicating them anymore. Instead I was seeing a swarm of civilian planes and what looked like another allied squadron. Another one? "Dammit they aren't on my radar anymore. Edge…"

"Negative, I can't see them either Blaze."

"We've lost them too Captain. There's too much interference." Grimm reported.

The airport control tower suddenly became aware of the situation. I guess command didn't tell them so not to cause a panic. "This is the Airport Control Tower, emergency alert! All planes cancel takeoff clearance. All approaching flights change coarse immediately!"

"Change our course? Change it to where?" One flight captain said over the radio, and I thought the same thing. This was the only major airport in hundred of miles.

Another flight was having different concerns, "This is Air Ixiom Flight 31, a high speed aircraft just passed by us six hundred yards away!"

"They're allied fighters taking off on an emergency mission," the Airport Control Tower said, "All flights heads up for mid-air collisions."

We joined up with Chopper, with the Yuke fighters conspicuously absent. "That's us too," I said, looking at all the blinking tail and wing lights in the air.

"A fighter? I thought the war was over on the West Coast," someone said.

Chopper must have been annoyed after losing those fighters. "Aw, how peaceful this place is. I'm choking up here," he said mockingly.

"Which squadron was that do you think?" Grimm asked.

"It's the Capital District Air Defense Squadron," Capital Air Command said abruptly over the radio, "the enemy has unleashed chemical weapons in a college town 400 miles from the airport." Chemical weapons, so this was a cover. I guess it always comes to this. "One squadron is on their way to spread neutralizers. You're the only ones that can defend the airport."

"How could they?" Grimm said speechless.

"Which one is the containment attack? Are they both for real?" Chopper asked, to which no one save the Yukes could answer. He hailed me. "Say Blaze, I guess the other side of the coin is bad news too huh?"

"I guess so. Not much we can do about it." Not much we could do at all.

"Yeah, not that things are any better over here."

"Blaze," Nagase said with a sudden urgency.

"Go ahead."

"I think I have the bandits. Vector 180 from us."

"That's right over a housing area. We can't engage them over that," Grimm said.

I looked at my IFF. "We won't have too they're inbound…wait…" They weren't the same. It just wasn't the same radar signature from the MiG-31's. They were different aircraft. "These aren't the same fighters. Additional enemies inbound."

"Great. Now we have this to deal with," Chopper said.

"Where are they coming from?" Grimm kept asking, "How could they get this far into our airspace?" It wasn't right.

"What are we going to do Captain?" Chopper asked me. I looked down at the IFF and to my fuel gauge. There wasn't enough time or enough of us to engage everyone.

"We're going to have to take guard over the airport. Let's go to angles 4 and keep a sharp eye." I felt doomed. We were going to have stay over the airport despite lacking fuel. We might not get the hornets back to the Oured Naval Facility but we didn't have any other options. We got into formation a few above the airport. If the enemies came within range we would engage them. If they stayed near the end of the city we could afford to chase after, despite any damage they could do. Our orders were to protect the Airport, and that's what I was going to do.

"Hey what's all the ruckus outside?" an airport personal said over the radio.

"Attention all airport personal, this is an emergency!" The tower kept repeating over different channels.

"An emergency? What's going on?" someone else said.

"We've just learned that several aircraft of unknown origin are inbound."

"What?! You sure it's not some false report?"

"We've spotted them on our radar as well," the control tower said. "This is for real!"

I kind of felt bad for them. There were in the middle of a situation in which there were powerless to fix. I banked right to circle around the airport and noticed the turmoil that was beginning to grip the tarmac. It must have been a thousand times worse inside the airport for those guys. I knew the enemy was still inbound, and thus I knew it was going to get a lot worse for all of us. Except I didn't know.

"Look at all the enemies on the IFF!" Grimm said. And he was right. They were everywhere on the radar. According to the IFF we were not just surrounding but immersed in them. Except we couldn't see anyone in the air.

"Where?" Chopper exclaimed. "In the air! On the ground?!"

"I can't see anything…" Nagase said. "Wait…" She broke off, descending and flying toward the runway.

"Edge, what's up?" I asked.

"Look at the runway, next to the terminals on both sides," she responded. The terminals? Was she talking about passenger planes?

"This is the Airport Control Tower, military transport planes parked along the runway, state your squadron number and call sign."

"This is Capital District Air Command. We haven't deployed any allied military transport planes to civilian airports at this time."

"Tanks coming out of transport planes! They're firing! It's the enemy! Enemy forces inside the airport!" He sounded hysterical.

I few along Nagase's wing coming over the runway, and there they were. They weren't really hard to spot since the runway was clear of traffic. And the shell flashes were as clear as day as they opened fire on the security gates. "Dammit!" How could this have happened of all things? These planes weren't exactly stealth.

"What?" Chopper shouted over the radio. "This is the middle of Osea how could they attack us here?"

"How did they sneak in here?" someone at Capital Air Command asked.

"Never mind," Capital Air Command said. "Just destroy the tanks and transport planes. Don't let them cause any more damage here."

"Easier said than done," I stated. We were not equipped for air to ground combat, which meant it might be impossible to hit the tanks with our missiles.

"What are we going to do kid? Those aircraft are still inbound." He was right. The radar showed they be at the airport in only minutes. But we didn't have many options. We couldn't cover the entire area information. It was the worst situation I could imagine, and we wouldn't have any reinforcements, at least in time.

"We'll just have to engage the enemy as they come. Everyone disperse and take cover positions along the runway. Make sure to avoid hitting the terminals when engaging the tanks," I said.

"Roger that Captain. Moving to engage at will," Grimm responded.

"We'll this is going to be fun. I always wanted to blow up some tanks," Chopper stated.

"I read you Blaze. Moving to engage at will," Nagase said.

They broke off, flying out away to meet the enemy on the ground, with limited armament, and no real ground ordinance. It occurred t me though, even if we had some precision guided bombs on our F-18's we would not be able to use in the airport. So we were left with radar and heat seeking missiles, which may or may not work against the Yuke tanks. No time to consider that though. There was a war to fight.

I did roll, simultaneously lowering my altitude to better engage the tanks. There was about one minute, actually it was probably like twenty or thirty seconds until the fighters would be over head. Then I would have to start covering my squadron as well a few dozen civilian planes. There two tanks coming out of a transport plane parked on the fart end of the runway. A flash of red light emerged as they fired at a terminal on the other side. Why did they want to do this?

"Ah! Dammit! Two of the enemy tanks are firing at the connecter terminal on the far side. Can't someone do something about," one of the airport personal shouted hysterically.

"This is fighter squadron. We'll take care of the Yuke tanks," I said to whoever it was. I had two remaining AIM-9 sidewinders. They could overshoot without a heat signature to follow. Four remaining radar guided missiles, they had the same problem, but what were my options? I pitched down, aiming my nose straight at the two tanks at five hundred feet, the on board alarm sounding. I remember some instructor instructor at Hirelark in the back seat of double F-1 telling me never to do this again. I the target went red. Radar lock. I fired.

The felt the fighter surge up as the two missile dropped underneath. T could see them in my mind not finding the tanks, flying into the building behind them. That, or because I was so low the missiles would just explode underneath me. Then I would shot myself down. They flew on target, straight toward the tanks, exploding in a satisfying flash of red light.

"Tanks destroyed!" One of the airport personal shouted.

"I saw that kid. Nice shot. Looks like our missiles will work against these tanks," Chopper commented.

"Thanks," I responded. "We have to hurry up and take out these tanks before those fighters show up."

I saw Nagase's plane fire a missile, flying and striking a tank from one of the transport planes on the southern portion of the tarmac. I saw Grimm strafe one of the enemy C-5 with gun fire, causing one of the wings to explode and catch fire. We just might do this.

The airport control began to hail some of the passenger planes. "ABS Flight 302, AER Flight 417, landing clearance cancelled! Abort your landing!"

"This is flight 417 we've been in a holding pattern for hours. We're on emergency fuel."

"It's too dangerous. I can't give you landing clearance right now."

"Tell that to my fuel tank. Can't you help us land here?"

"This is OWA Flight 783 we're running out of fuel too."

"Are you listening to me? This is war here! The flight terminal is getting shot at! Dammit! This is a civilian airport!" The airport control man sounded as if he was going to cry. We had to get control of airspace quickly. "Dammit! Damn those dirty Yukes!" I felt his rage.

The warning light went off in my cabin. I had been spike by enemy radar. The fighters had arrived. "Watch our out everyone. Enemy fighters incoming."

"Perfect timing too, shit." Chopper said.

I turned my plane up, only about a hundred yards from crashing into the ground bellow. I hit the throttle accelerating toward them. Four targets, not the boys we had met on the way to Apito Airport, which left me to worry about where they went. "I'll engage the bogeys. You guys tank out the tanks."

I heard that pilot's words. "It's never smart to fly solo in battle kid."

"You shouldn't," Nagase said to me. "I'll back you up."

"Take out the tanks, Edge. Don't worry. I'll call for help if I need it."

Four targets, right on the nose. I was almost close enough to wave to the Yuktobanian pilots.

"Blaze!"

They all had me spiked, but I had one of them two. One fired at me, and could make out over the radio the distorted "Fox 2" as the missile dislodge from the tip of the wing. I could see what planes they were too. TND-GR1's, attackers. They wanted to level the airport. One missile fired from his wing after I fired a longer range sparrow and pitched down. It's a crazy move that often doesn't work. Pop's told me that once when I asked.

The missile hit the cockpit of the TND-GR1, and his missed me, barely. I looked over my shoulder. Two were banking right while the other was going left. I probably shot down his wingman.

"Dammit, this guy is good. We can't beat him head on."

I pulled right, trying as best I could to keep an eye on the two fighters. I figured it was better to engage them rather than have two on my tail. But I as soon as I got on their tail one broke right passing right underneath, and I over shot. "Dammit!" I pulled right expecting to hear sounds of bullets hitting my hull until I saw an Osean F-18 pass in front of my plane and shoot down one of the fighters with a missile. I knew who it was.

"Nagase, I told you to take out the tanks."

"Yes you did Blaze." She said that while shooting down the two remaining fighters.

"Chopper here. The tanks are moving toward the center of the runway. Like the-r up to something."

"Roger that. We're coming in." Nagase, she saved me again. "This is Blaze. We've shot down the Yuke attackers looks like we have air superiority.

I pulled in toward the runway, feeling as though I was coming in for landing. There was a flash on my left flank. The IFF was placing the rest at the center of the runway. "Edge, how many missiles do you have left?"

"I'm Winchester Blaze, no missiles remaining." Just what I need.

"Alright, just give us some cover incase those other fighters show up."

"Copy that," she acknowledged.

I flew over the tanks. Grimm was below me. I saw the explosion as one of his missiles impacted a tank. "Tank destroyed."

"There's way too many enemy planes here," Chopper said over the radio. "I mean eve if they could fly all the way here. Refuel get through our air defenses to attack our Capital there's not nearly enough of them to occupy the entire country. These guys are on a suicide mission and they know it."

Honor in suicide. The Belkans had believed in that, so much that the dropped nuclear weapons on their own people.

"They must really hate us or else they wouldn't have taken it this far," Chopper added.

"What lies at the root of this is hatred itself," Nagase said.

I hated my life. Did that lead me to kill so many people?

"AH!" Grimm shouted. I looked down toward his aircraft to see him narrowly avoid a missile. A missile from were. Two enemy targets near one of the transport planes. They were SAM's.

"Mobile SAM's! Everyone watch themselves," I said over the radio. I looked toward the weapons indicator. One missile left.

"I got these guys Blaze." Chopper said, flying low and fast toward the targets. "Fox 1!" The missile dropped and hit, exploding right between the two vehicles. Two with one stone. Nice Chopper.

"Nice kill Lt. Chopper," Grimm said. "Thanks for getting them off me there.

"Yeah. You owe me one Grimm."

"Alright people we nearly got the area sanitized let's finish this."

"Roger that kid. You sound like a real Captain now," Chopper said to me.

"Just do it Chopper."

I was flying then toward the lake we had flown in over. A beautiful moon was shining over the water.

"Damn! This is the Airport Control Tower to the Osean fighter pilot we just picked up an incoming aircraft on own radar. He's coming right at you!"

"What!"

Gunfire.

I rolled over and down in jump of adrenalin just in time. I looked up. An A-10. I saw a jet black A-10 Warthog fly at speed right toward the airport.

"Everyone head's up! There's an A-10 Attacker incoming!"

"An A-10? How the hell did they get that thing all the way in here?" Chopper wondered.

I pulled around, seeing the ghost like shape, like something from a nightmare fly toward the airport. With all the firepower he had…I couldn't let him.

"Someone shoot him down!"

"I got him Captain. He's coming into range," Grimm said.

"This is Geist. What's the status on the chemical attack?"

The Attacker flew low and fast not slowing. He emptied two missiles into one of the hangars. There was at least ten airport personal in there.

"I'm letting this guys hurt any more people," Grimm said.

"I can't believe you guys let yourselves be defeated so quickly. I'll show you how it's done."

Gunfire strafing the side of one of the terminals. I had to stop him.

"Someone do something about that plane!" one of the airport staff shouted. "There's still people in here!" He fired two more missiles, destroying two of the airport fire engines. More gunfire into the roof of the central terminal. He was working his way to the tower.

Grimm was on his tail. "I've got him. Fox 2!" The missile fired. The ghost pitched up and jinked right hard. "Dammit it missed."

"Grimm, focus your attack on the tanks. I'll take the A-10." I had to do it. If I didn't no one else would be able to.

"I copy Captain."

I got on his tail. Following him till I had a perfect shot that I knew he wouldn't avoid. He did one sharp turn after another, slowing down, trying to get to overshoot so he nail me with gunfire. I wasn't letting him.

"You're pretty good. You one of the guys that sank our submarine?"

"Maybe."

I was close…

"I guess we have you to thank for this little party."

I almost had him…

"If you boys didn't attack that university. I wouldn't have the chance to come to Osea and play."

He's was heading back toward airport. I almost had him…

"You know that this war can only truly end if we do what it necessary."

He fire two more of his air-to-ground missiles not even aiming at where they were going.

"You have to engage all of enemies," the ghost said.

"Those people were innocent."

"You know there are no innocents in war."

Out of the darkness…

"No." Missile lock. "I was once one." Fire.

His right wing blew off, and the body caught fire, a fiery ghost falling towards the earth. It hit the tarmac, rolling in blazing flames, shattering until all the pieces came to rest on the concrete. There was no chute, and I was glad of that.

"Nice kill kid," Chopper hailed.

"Blaze shot down the aircraft. Air superiority is ours." Nagase said.

The tanks had been taken out, or immobilized. Passing over I could see many of the remaining forces surrendering. At least they had the sense not to waste their own lives.

"This is Blaze. All aircraft report."

"Edge reporting. We've sanitized the area." She sounded sad. So was I.

"Archer reporting. I took some damage but I'm fine."

"Chopper here. I'm bright and peachy kid. Wish I could say the same about the airport."

"It really took a beating didn't it?" Grimm commented.

We formed back into formation and passed over the airport. Despite everything for the most part it was okay. Though there was major damage to several sections, most of populated areas had been spared from the attack. Maybe most of the soldiers didn't want to kill civilians, unlike that ghost. Capital District Air Command came back on the line. It seemed like they had just disappeared throughout most of the fight.

"Enemy forces annihilated. Airport Control Tower, what do you say?"

"Affirmative enemy defeat confirmed. Give our thanks to your aces up there!"

A desperate situation, but we made it out, and in one piece, mostly. I regretted it. Maybe it was the ghost or just the stress from the engagement. But I knew it would have been much worse if we hadn't been there.

On the way back I found myself saying, "I wonder how they'll think of this when we get back."

I remember once riding my motorcycle around a blind corner at full throttle. I had a habit of pushing sharp turns. And there was a truck coming head on. The horn blared and I panicked, my mind possessed by the paralyzing thought that I was going to die. I swerved and it missed me. I lost control and flew off my bike into the road.

It hurt. But I was still alive.

-Stonehenge


	18. Powder Keg

Fire

"There's no mercy in war. There's only life and death. We just to have to hope we're in the former." That's what Blaze said to me.

"It doesn't have to be that way. We can change things." That's what I should've said back.

We all were feeling pretty down after the Apito Airport instance, and the chemical weapons attack on the college town, Bana City. We were sent into battle despite allegations of war crimes, and sent into overwhelming conditions no less. It was sort off like they wanted us to bite the dust out there, at the expense of any civilians the got killed by the Yukes.

The Yukes that invaded our country…

Collateral damage and retaliation for that attack on the Dresden Engineering University, that's what it was.

Vengeance…and stupidity.

We flew back to the Oured Naval Base after a midnight mid-air refueling, and we had already been awake for a long time. At least I had. Blaze and Chopper seemed to sleep easily on the flight into Bradford, and in the car ride to Oured. I could hear  
Chopper snoring through the walls of the Golden Dawn. I could never sleep in those transports, not on seats like those on a military freight transport plane like the C-5 we flew in.

Maybe it's a sign of weakness?

Anyway I was tired, and I was angry.

We didn't reach Oured Airspace until two hours later, all landing at once on the runway in tight formation. We taxied to Hangar B. Waited for the canopy to open and the ladder to be in place and returned to base. Not our base though.

The only thing I wanted at that point was to get out of my flight suit and into a bunk, didn't care where or if the sheets were clean. It's funny, I used to make a big deal about that. Sleep, it seemed next to heaven, but it wasn't going to come soon.

The base ground crew had gathered around planes. Pilots, maintenance crew, the base police, or civilians that just happened to be in the area, it didn't matter. There was a mob of people bigger than all the personal at Sand Island. All of them cheering and applauding for us.

I have to admit. It felt good. When does it not feel good to be praised by throngs of people? Even battle fatigue seemed to dissipate, and the past thirty-six hours seemed less than ten minutes.

I looked for Blaze. He must have been very unhappy. He always disliked lots of people, usually made pains to avoid them. I once thought it was because he hated them. At least that's what I thought way back in the academy. I thought that way back in Hierelark. But then in that war I realized why. He of all people was afraid.

I cursed my relative shortness and even the fact that I was a woman for a moment when I jumped down onto the tarmac, because I was immediately lost in all the base personnel. Like in old horror movies, when victims got lost in the corn fields.

"Congratulations."

"Good job."

"Kick ass!"

"Waydago!"

"Osea! Osea! Osea!"

"Wardog!"

Those they said and everything else I couldn't hear, while all the base members tried to shake my hands, grab my ass, or even kiss me.

"Excuse me!" I said as politely as I could while still forcefully implying, "Get the hell out of my way!" I parted the sea as best I could. I thought if I could make it to Blaze they'd back off. Maybe at least. He might well have been in the same situation.

Eventually I didn't have to walk anymore because the mob had picked me up, and I was riding on one of the ground crew's shoulders.

"I wonder what they'll think of this when we get back," Blaze had said on the flight back. What will they think? He had said it almost sarcastically, as though he expected us to be treated as traitors. The way we had been treated when we first arrived and in front of our superiors. Common traitors, insidious deceivers, the worst crime imaginable for military men and women, that's what _they_ thought of us.

It was dark when we were flying back, but when I was at that hearing it was as light as day.

There were three men, like the three ideals on the seal of the court. "Justice, integrity, service." A general from the Army, an admiral from the Navy, and a colonel from the Air Defense Force, there to judge us without even calling it a trial.

"Miss Nagase," the general had said, "what is your opinion of the presently missing Captain Bartlett?

I had to bite my lip to keep myself from shouting out at them. All in a moment I imagined myself screaming, calling them traitors and war conquerors, blaming them for it all. All the dead men and women that lay on the ground of the Bastok Peninsula and floating in the waves of St. Hewlett. But I didn't say that.

"Captain Bartlett was the best there is sir. He was the one that kept us alive during the first few battles. No doubt we would have…"

"Your praise aside Lt. Nagase, your overall assessment was that he was a competent commander?" he said, and his tone made it sound like an insult.

"Yes sir."

"You believe this despite the fact that he routinely disobeyed orders, had no respect the chain command, had a past affair with a Yuktobaninan Recon Major, and in all of fifteen years since he last achieved the rank of captain, had not once received a promotion?" the Admiral had asked.

I almost couldn't contain myself that time. What did he know about it? Had he been there in any of those battles? Had every bothered to find the truth, or did he just blindly hate?

"I did sir."

"Considering this, what is your assessment of your current commander? First Lt. Blaze Arré?"

Blaze? What was he feeling when I was in there? Was he going to get the same question about me? About Grimm? About Chopper? About himself? When I heard the question I saw Blaze take down that ace over the Bastok Peninsula. I saw him defend a cargo plane from multiple fighters. I saw him lead the air forces that destroyed the Scinfaxi. I didn't want to answer him. It wasn't fair.

"Lieutenant?"

"I feel the same sir. I believe the record of our engagements so far speaks for itself."

"Oh really Lieutenant?" the admiral said, "You feel the same even when he deliberately led you in an attack against innocent civilians?"

That's how it went. That's how they, the top brass, felt about us. Traitors.

Lucky for us though, not everyone in the Osean military felt that way. The adulation they were pouring over us was almost embarrassing. It was more than we had received at any time previous in war. All of it despite the attitude of our leadership.

I tried to balance as the throng carried me. I saw Blaze's plane, and tried to make way over, not with any real success. If that was what being a rock star is like, I might pass. When I was finally able to get down there was still a huge mosh of people to make my way through. More hugs, 'thank you's and enough of everything else to have a lawsuit against the base. Pushing through an applauding staff sergeant I was in the clear, and actually could see where I was.

Blaze had already made it through and was making his way to the locker room. I heard Chopper behind living it up, cheering with everyone. Grimm I guess got more lost than I was in the crowd. I took a deep breath, felt the exhaustion of day catching up to me. The hearing and battle, all in all nearly twenty four hours had past since the day began. And it must have shown on my face. I heard Grimm struggling behind me as I walked to catch up with Blaze.

He was about to the open the door when I did. "Hey."

He stopped looking back at me, dark circles under his eyes. "It's been a rough day. We'd better hurry this up so we can't get some rest," he said.

"Yeah." I laughed a bit. "You look pretty dead."

He nodded a bit, taking in deep breath while helicopters flew overhead. "Yeah. I bet. I feel pretty dead too. Makes sense." His head bent a little, like he was carrying a heaving weight on his shoulders, and I couldn't help but feel pity for him over all that had happened.

He moved to go inside. "Blaze. It's not all bad." He looked at me, piercing fiery eyes that seemed so far away. I wanted to give him assurance, I wanted him to feel like he would have a future after this. "It won't be like this forever. Sooner or later they will all forget. And the war will be over." I wanted to give him something profound. Something that could inspire him. Something to overcome despair like in books and stories. But the words sounded so dry in the cold Oured air.

"I know Kei. Just…sometimes I wish I could leave my heart behind." And he went inside.

I thought of the woman who's true love died, and swore never to love again. I thought all the fallen airmen, all those trainees I had flown with, whose bodies will never return to Earth. I thought Blaze and the despair he felt, and then I felt it too. I felt the edge of a pit of despair that descended into utter darkness. And darkness came over me as the door shut behind him.

There was a sword lodged into the trunk of tree, flower petals falling, and single drop of blood fell and turned the world red. That's want I dreamt of on the cargo plane ride back to Sand Island.

Following the attack on the airport and our return to base we were ordered to the briefing room at Oured Naval. That same Lt. Colonel that ordered us out was there to meet us. I had to resist the urge to break his jaw. He applauded us as we entered, as though he had foreseen the entire battle, like he knew we would come back alive.

"Congratulations. Bravo Captain. That really was some show out there. You know I had thought all the praise you had received in the media was misplaced. Guess there is some truth behind rumor."

"Man I swear." I heard Chopper mutter under his breath.

"Thank you sir," Blaze responded.

There was some awkward silence then as he and Blaze just starred at one another, the Colonel with that same condensating grin.

"Well, I suppose you all are wondering what's next. Him? Well rest assured because the hearings as of now are suspended."

"What?" Grimm said.

"You heard me right Airman. The hearings are suspended. Headquarters has decided that your remarkable talents are needed on the battlefield. So much so in fact that headquarters is even making the issue…disappear for the moment. You've done very well for yourselves. Unprecedented even." He paused turning his eyes toward me, and I did my best to glare back. "I know you don't like me that much. You're not supposed too. It's part of my job. But relax, you're all going back to Sand Island then to the front lines. Congratulations."

"You're congrats is in-appreciated," Chopper said. And Grimm nearly winced.

The Colonel laughed. "Yeah. I perceived that. You're flight leaves in one hour. A nice spacious C-130 on runway A. You may have to share it with some tanks though. Well, good night." He put on his cap and walked out, his foot steps echoing through the empty room.

"That son-of-a-bitch!" Chopper shouted, hitting one of the chairs.

"Hey!" I said trying to calm him down, but he wasn't having it.

"No! I can't take this! There jerking us around like a dog on a leash!"

"Chopper."

"It's…" He struck the table and went to pacing around the room. "This sucks guys."

"No one's saying it doesn't," I said. "We just have to put up with it for now, for the rest…"

"We shouldn't have to put with it at all! C'mon Nagase! We deserve better! You deserve better. I mean…why did you join the Air Defense Force?"

I tried to answer, my tongue made the motions but there was no sound. It seemed too long ago to remember. But it wasn't. It wasn't that long ago at all. I looked to Blaze, as if it would give some inspiration, but he only starred at the floor like he wasn't hearing anything.

"Huh?" Chopper went on. "I bet it wasn't to be treated like this by our superiors. Not to be thrown around like rag doll. Like we weren't worth the planes we fly, or the ground we walk on! Right Nagase! Didn't you dream of flying? Dreamed of serving you're country with honor? Being a hero? Getting the praise of your friends and family? And protecting people! We did that! We've done all of it? Hell we've done more in past two months than they've done in their whole careers! Yet they're the ones with the huge offices, the fancy letter heads, the pay raises and the damn health benefits of not being shot at!" He kicked a chair sending it flying a few inches from where Blaze was sitting, who still didn't move. "C'mon! Fuck!"

He leaned on the briefing table breathing heavily form his rant. I felt a pain in my throat at his words. I felt paralyzed by the truth of it, the truth of what was happening.

Now Chopper's breathing echoing through the room, in tandem with my heart. "You wanted that, right Nagase? So did I." Chopper said softly.

A sword lodged in a tree, and a drop of blood fell, painting the world red.

Chopper was right. I knew it, but I didn't have the heart to say it out loud. I was too overwhelmed by the exhaustion, by the war, and by my own sadness. I felt a longing to go home, like so many bad days. I wanted to fly away from it all, to cut out my heart and leave it broken on the floor with all the gravity it held. I just wanted it all to end.

"It does suck Chopper," Blaze began. "I would say that underscores it. We do deserve better. But it doesn't matter. We have to do our duty as soldiers, no matter the pain involved, and no matter the treatment we get from the top brass. Besides the war can't last forever. What counts is that we're alive at the end."

"Yeah I know. I just needed to get that out there. Don't know about any of you, but I'm tired."

Chopper sat down, holding his head in his hands.

"We all are," I said. The sounds of jet engines came from outside. The squadron deployed to Bana City had just returned. One hundred twenty one civilians became sick from the chemical attack. Ten died.

None of us said anything for the longest time. None of us wanted to. There was veil of silence over everything that had happened. And in our hearts, we all wished for Bartlett to return. For the whole mess to disappear; just as the Lt. Colonel had said. And we all knew that wasn't going to happen. Where ever the Captain was then, his thoughts were far away from what was going on in Oured.

C-130's despite the different number wasn't really any different than the C-5 we had flown in. At least to me anyway. Not that I paid much attention to the details of the aircraft when we boarded. It felt all the same, not much when compared to the cockpit of a fighter jet. The seats were uncomfortable, the engine noise too loud to hear myself think, much less what anyone else had to say

It was a straight flight this time, no stops or "turnovers." A straight flight back to Sand Island. It's like they were desperate to get rid of us. And we were just as desperate to get away from them. The engines too loud to think, yet I was so exhausted I still fell asleep not long after boarding.

A sword lodged in the trunk of a tree, cherry blossoms falling all around. A single drop of blood fell from the blade and painted the world red. I dreamt that image on the trip back. A flower and a weapon, peace and war, Captain Bartlett and Colonel Perrault, guns and butter, Grimm and Chopper, and Blaze…everything in my mind seemed to be spiraling together in one maelstrom, circling down to some conclusion. I remember from school, everything is connected. You just have to see what the connection is. The previous war and this one, the Arkbird and the Scinfaxi…there was common thread between all of it, a signal point to which everything leads. But what is it? Why was this happening to us? Why after so much peace was the world descending into the diabolical talons of death?

Razgriz, the demon from the fairy tales, the dark and terrifying force that rained death upon the land, was it happening again? Was I the princess, and the Razgriz has come to destroy my world? Has he come to kill the dove, and bring me to unbearable sorrow?

That's what I thought about on the ride back.

Fifteen hours later we were back at Sand Island.

Nothing unexpected happened on our arrival. No MP's or crowd of cheering onlookers to greet us. It was business as usual for the base and we were pretty glad to have that compared to the previous days. Hamilton met us outside of the crew room and did a speedy debriefing. He didn't seem to care much about what went on in Oured. He didn't even ask anything about the Committee. He welcomed us back and went straight back to his duties, like he always did.

With our speedy return from the Capital there was nothing for us to do on the base. I suppose they thought we'd be gone for much longer than we were. So all assignments were handed out to the other squadrons.

Near the end of the day I found myself sitting alone on a bench next the Control tower, hands folded and leaning forward starring at the ocean and all the white gulls around the base. I guess I was trying to clear my head. Blaze did this often, eyes starring out over the horizon, looking for something out of sight. There were a lot of times I thought about joining him, never did because he always seemed to want to be alone. Loneliness, was that really what he wanted?

Pops found me there not long after sitting down. Maybe he was sensing my despair?

"Hey. Why are you of all people sitting all by yourself on a beautiful day like this?" he asked while sitting down next to me.

It was a beautiful day. I hadn't noticed/

"I just have a lot on my mind."

"I'll bet. For a moment I thought you were Blaze."

"What? How can you make that mistake?"

"Well his hair fairly dark, not as dark as yours, nor as lovely. But is usually the one to off by himself, thinking."

I laughed slightly. "I do this often What's wrong with it?"

"Oh nothing, nothing. Just you're usually busy. You usually have your book with you."

I look down, seeing my bare hands folded. He was right. In my spare moments I often had it with my, reading, rereading, trying to remember what was ion the missing pages. That or I was reading briefings.

"Well…"

"It's fine Nagase. Honestly, I came over because I'm a bit concerned."

"About what?"

"About you. What else?"

"Really?"

"Yeah. All of you. You four have been through much more in the past two months than most pilots have in two years. And with this mess about the invasion, it could drive the best of the best over a cliff."

I remembered Chopper back in the Capital. I thought of Blaze and Grimm, and all the fighting in the airport.

"Yeah," I said, starring down into the ground. "It's been tough. I've…"

"It's okay. It's alright to feel overwhelmed by the pressure."

"Why?" I asked, the question burning under my skin. "Why do they not trust us?"

"They never trusted Bartlett. They dislike who trained you. They dislike the fact you're all from an auxiliary squadron, and all the attention you're getting. They've wanted this war for along time. They don't want you have the lime light."

"That doesn't make any sense. We've only ever done our duty. Just because our Captain is missing…"

"..And had a lady friend in Yuktobania, a Recon Major. And disappeared on an intelligence vessel, spying on our ports just moments before the War began. And you guys have beaten the odds to the point where they don't believe it. In their minds the four of you should have died a long time ago."

We silent for moment, overcome by the engines of a fighter landing. Was all it really true? How could they be so stupid?

"Well, don't let it get to you. Just remember all the tricks Bartlett taught you, and stick to wingman. Stick to Blaze. Honestly, he's the best rookie I've ever seen. You couldn't have asked for a better wingman."

I had barely thought about it. Blaze, he had taken down more planes than anyone else in the war, including three enemy aces.

"Yeah."

"Keep an eye on him too. Kei, I think he trusts you more than anyone else. And he'll probably need your help before long."

"I don't think so. I don't think I'll ever be able to catch up with him."

"Well you don't have to worry about catching up with him, just making sure he doesn't get shot down."

I laughed, remembering what I had said on the onset of the war.

"That's better." Pops stood up stretching out his arms. "Chopper's fast asleep in his quarters already. I recommend you do the same. I have a feeling they're going to ship you out of here soon."

"They're just dying to get rid of us."

"Ha, I bet they are. Remember to always keep and eye on your fuel gauge. And good luck." He casually saluted me and proceeded back toward the tarmac. A cold breeze came over my face. The sun was beginning to set, and about this time the winds usually shifted direction from north east to south west. It's important to keep track sometimes of those small things. For us a little was that was between life and death.

"I will now brief you on your mission orders. That's all I have to say to you now people. If you all really are innocent, then I suggest you prove it out there on the battlefield," Colonel Perrault said to us early the next morning. Pops was right.

The status of the War, at least from our standpoint, was going well. Very well. The Osean Army was advancing from the Bastok Penninsula into the Yuke mainland. Yuktobania was unable to mount a successful counter attack due to lack of air support, thanks in part our efforts. Headquarters no wanted to cut off the supply line to the Yuke Army by means of a deep air strike. Code named "Snake Pit" the operation was aimed at several massive weapons stock piles in the region surrounding Lake Dama. Because the stockpiles were tunneled deep into several mountains, bombers would be ineffective, just scorching the surface. That's were we came in.

"This will be primarily an air ground mission," Hamilton was saying during the briefing. "You'll each be loaded with six air-surface missiles. However it's not going to be so easy as just hitting tanks on the surface. Because of the depth of the tunnels only a straight shot inside will hit target. You'll have to do this manually."

"I thought this would be a walk in the park," Chopper said lightly.

Hamilton ignored him. "The steepness of the cliffside will make approach very difficult, use caution. Additionally we have received reports that enemy special forces in the area are using soldier mounted SAM's to defend the area. Watch yourself when flying at low altitude."

"Sir," Grimm began timidly. "We're doing this by ourselves are we?"

"The strike is a coordinated effort. The base here, fifty miles from the ammo dump provides air support to the region of Duga. The Osean 73rd as well as the other members of the 108th detachment will engage and destroy any inbound bogeys. However the strike itself will be carried out solely by the Wardog squadron."

"Geese." I said under my breath.

"Oh come on." Chopper exclaimed.

"Settle down. You guys are the best pilots we have. Your goal will be to deal as much damage as possible to stockpiles and the surrounding facilities. If you pull this off it will help to end the war in sort order. Dismissed."

"Ahhh," Chopper fumed. "Why do they keep doing this to us?"

"You heard the Captain. We're the best the Air Force has," Grimm said.

"That makes me feel a whole better Grimm. Thanks."

"We can do this," Blaze said suddenly. He hadn't said anything throughout the whole briefing. "We shouldn't have to deal with any fighters. As long as we keep an eye out for SAM's we should come out of this."

"I don't know about you kid. But I'm a little our of practice at flying through narrow ravines and dodging missiles at the same time!"

"Then you'll just have to stick to me up there," Blaze responded.

"You sound a bit confident," I said.

"Will it really be that easy Captain?" Grimm asked.

"It won't be easy but…"

"If you say so kid. Let's just get this over with."

Duga, that was what they called that place. It was the first time I had ever heard of it. It's ironic how war tends to make people more geographically literate. The same with Lake Dama. It was a high latitude jungle region, relatively. The place was pretty warm considering that time of the year. Sort of like Sand Island. If we had waited a few weeks there might have been snow. It was beautiful place.

"Edge, are you ready?" Blaze hailed me over the radio. We nearly to the target area only six miles, maintaining a low altitude to reduce detection. Almost there by that time the other squadrons had began their assault on the Yuke Air Base, providing cover for our operation. Here we go.

"Yeah. I'm good."

"Ready yeah?" Chopper began to say. "Seriously now they have turning right back into another battle and this scenery definitely clashed with my rock n' roll."

"I'm just glad they're not having attack a city in retaliation for their retaliation," Grimm responded.

"Hey, you're a real optimist you know that."

I shook my head. They could go a moment without commenting on the situation. I'm glad for it though. It made the mission just a bit easier.

"This is Thunderhead. Cut the chatter." The AWACS finally made their appearance.

"Oh. I just wish I could fly somewhere where I wouldn't have to listen to that voice," Chopper remarked. I agreed with him a bit.

"You did until yesterday," replied Grimm.

"You'll be arriving at you're target area shortly." Thunderhead said.

"Well I don't want to listen to that interrogation committee at the Capital either," Chopper continued.

"There it is," Blaze said over the radio. The target area, it was from most of the bases we had seen recently. The jungle was too thick and mesas too numerous to make out any structures. With all the foliage it would be perfect cover for soldiers for wait attacks. We would have carpet bomb everything to be sure. I guess they're sending us to save resources.

"The actual armory is located in an under ground shelter. Fire missiles into the tunnels and destroy it from inside. We'll feed you the attack data now," Thunderhead reported. My IFF blinked and suddenly there were dozens of targets on screen. So many for four planes.

"Look at em all! This will take forever," Chopper reported.

"We'll have to disperse to hit them all. Move to engage at will. Everyone watch their six," Blaze ordered.

"Roger that. I don't want to shot down by any SAM's."

We broke our formation, spreading out to cover a wider area, while still keeping within visual contact of each other. It was the best strategy given the number of targets, but I never felt comfortable with. While in formation we could function as squad. One or two engage will the others keep cover from enemy aggression. It's the basic rules of fighter combat. We seemed to breaking most of them lately. I keep wondering if it was our skill or our luck that kept us alive to that point.

"Four planes have been detected on radar sound the air raid siren." Of course by that time they were too late.

"Loud the Varyakes. Prepare to engage aircraft!"

I came in range in one of the tunnels. It was tiny compared to how large the weapons depot was supposed to be. One large truck would be able to enter at a time, making evacuation virtually impossible. The slope of the opposing was gradual but still close to entrance. Dangerous but I just had to put with that.

"Edge engaging." I pointed my noise straight at it, relaxing the throttle as much as I could and still keep combat speed. I remembered flying head-on to Yuke SU-27's at the beginning of the war. I remembered dive bombing the Scinfaxi. I had experience performing these tactics, but it still scared me. And my heart beat… The HUD went red and I shot the missile, straight on target. I began to pull up and relax a bit, but then the warning alarm went off. A missile! I pulled up the stick as hard as I could; hitting the throttle toward the sky, and the F-18 seemed to respond painfully slow. The alarm went off. I had dodged it. Stupid!

"Edge!"

"I'm fine Blaze."

"Enemy shoulder launch SAM," Chopper said, "Did any one who launched it."

"No. It came out of nowhere," Grimm said.

"Wardog, negative. Our search radar's clean. We can't see the launchers," Thunderhead reported.

"Damn you're useless," Chopper shouted.

"We'll have to be careful at low altitude," Blaze said, and the words 'no shit,' as my heart was still pounding. How many times was I going to have a missile on my tail? At least that time no one had to save to me.

"Roger that Captain. I'll attack the next tunnel," Grimm said, turning his plane around to approach vector. Locking on and shooting, this time without a missile bearing down on him. A bright flame from the mouth was all that was visible of the explosion. That and the enemy's radio chatter began to get more desperate. Still a lot more targets to go.

"Nice of you to volunteer Grimm," Chopper joked, always joking at the wrong times.

"This is Thunderhead; you're moving too slowly Wardog. The other teams won't be able to keep enemy air units occupied much longer."

"Hey give us a break here. This isn't that easy," Chopper complained, again.

"He's right. We'll never get to all the armoires like this," I said.

"Oh you taking his side now Nagase?" Chopper asked me sarcastically.

I began to say something when Blaze's voice came over the radio. "We need to split up. Grimm, Chopper, start engaging the other facilities. Edge and I will finish up here."

"This is Archer, understood Captain."

"Roger that."

A fire was beginning to start underground. Some of the smoke was visible from the destroyed tunnels. In such a confined place it must have been hell on Earth. I tired not to empathize with them. That would be the worst thing to do on a mission. Still I couldn't help it/. Multiple sirens began to blare loud enough for us to hear it in the cockpit.

Blaze went the attack, firing down toward a tunnel much faster that I had. Two missiles from the soldiers in the jungle came up after him, but he was long gone before they could touch him. I couldn't help but be impressed. "Nice Blaze."

"Yeah. This is getting a bit dangerous."

"We can handle it. Like you said," I told him.

"Yeah…There's some enemy harriers are taking off ahead." I saw them, barely. Two contacts the IFF. They had just gotten off the ground, still in vertical lift. "I'll keep them busy. You destroy the last tunnel here."

"Got it. "Be careful." He broke off, flying at speed toward the enemy.

I had the last tunnel on that side of the mesa, the last one for us. I rolled left, changing vector to the point on the IFF.

Chopper's voice came over the radio. "Ah, one less tunnel for them to use."

"That was nice shot Lt. Chopper," Grimm said to him.

"You know it's kind of like…ah….sorry I thought I had a joke coming."

I rolled my eyes. "Chopper, you're a getting a little annoying. Concentrate on your mission."

"Hey I know you're stressed lady, but don't take it out on me."

"I…" An involuntary shudder came over me. A SAM was inbound, this time from directly bellow me. "Dammit!" My seemed to move on its own, rolling me right, sending me into a tight spiral downward. Again! I kept getting caught like this. It's party of being a fighter pilot, the bad part.

I heard Bartlett scolding me again. "Nagase! If you keep flying like that you're going to die real soon!" This is what he meant. I always let myself get caught in the situation, let my emotions dictate a little too much. It made me fierce but also reckless.

"I won't die sir." I had said that back.

I won't die.

I saw the contrail from the missile pass over me, the missile arcing toward me. It passed and lost target, the warning alarm stopping.

"Edge missile evaded," Thunderhead said.

"Lt. Nagase are you alright?" Grimm asked.

"Yeah," I responded. I had ended up just passed the target. I turned around and locked on, sending a bright light into the darkness. "Edge, Target destroyed."

"Roger that," Thunderhead said. "There are still several facilities remaining." He reminded us.

I flew up to higher altitude. Blaze was already there waiting for me. I came in on his left wing. We flew over the mesa to meet up with Chopper and Grimm. That area was wider than the others. It was maybe a mile across with the river in the center, narrowing toward the end brought together by a bridge with an AA vehicle parked on it. Several facilities dotted the dense canopy.

"Hey nice of you guys to join us. The rest of tunnels are long this area," Chopper said.

"Wardog. This is Thunderhead. Two MiG 29 fighters are inbound from vector 340."

"What?" Blaze said. "The other squadrons were supposed to take care of any aircraft. Where are these coming from?"

"Maybe they got through the other squadrons?" Grimm asked.

My IFF showed them then. Two bogeys closing in from 340. Coming to shoot us down. Not if I could help it.

"This is Edge. I'll engage the bandits. You guys continue to attack the enemy facilities."

"It's two on one. Wait!" Blaze began say. But before he had even started to speak I had pulled off, turning to engage the bandits. They came into visual range, two small birds in the distance.

"There's one engaging us. Alright let's be careful. We can't waste too must time with him."

They didn't move, just kept on their current vector. They were probably expecting me blink. They probably thought I'd fly over them and try to circle in their six. That's typically what I would have done too, except this time. Full throttle, rolling my plane right and using the rudder to balance my flight. The HUD went red and fox two. I pulled up, sending my plane into sharp right turn. Just in time. The missile hit, striking the fuselage, turning the plane into fireball which quickly disintegrated.

"Captain! Dammit!"

One destroyed.

I came around, trying to find the other with my eyes. There he was, coming straight at me, firing his guns. I rolled once, raising my altitude and watching his plane pass under me.

"What? Who are these pilots? Ah damn! This is too much!"

He began disengaged, heading back on the same attack axis, but he wasn't fast enough. I had his tail and fox two. He tried toe evade. The missile exploded right beside his right wing, and he bailed out to the jungle bellow.

I noticed the sweat all over me. And I could feel my heart beat, slowly but heavily. Reckless…

"Nagase! If you keep flying like that you'll die real soon!"

"Watch out Nagase! They're down bellow us too!" And he had saved me.

I wasn't going to be saved any more. Not this time.

"Nice shooting," Blaze had flown beside me.

"Thanks."

"Next time, you mind waiting for me?" He said.

"Yeah." Reckless.

We flew back into the target area, and destroyed the remaining tunnels to the armoires. The destruction caused a fire that began to spread all throughout the complex. Eventually it reached the ammo dump causing a massive explosion that blew off the top of the mesa.

"I didn't know it would blow up like that. Must be pretty bad down there. You thinking the same thing?"

I couldn't answer him. It was bad. I tried not to think of the horrific burns some of the soldiers would suffer because of it. The images of the last war came to mind, so did the inevitable disgust over it.

We had destroyed all the armoires, Thunderhead reported to us. Our mission was complete.

"Roger that," I had said. "Let's go home."

"Nagase," Chopper asked me.

"Hm?"

"You got to say that with a little more feeling. At least we get to go home right?"

"Yeah."

That time it was a mixed bag, coming back from that mission. I felt like I had done my duty in one sense. But I still could not cheer myself up over everything that had happened. Somehow things were improving, but at the same time they were getting inexorably worse.


	19. Demons of Razgriz

Fire

Amidst the eternal waves of time.  
From a ripple of change shall the storm rise.  
Out of the abyss peer the eyes of a demon.  
Behold the Razgriz, its wings of black sheath

I had the dream the previous night in which there was a bird, flying as a black raven over the icy sea.

I was lying alone, on my own bed, early, before the sun rose, and only the faint glow of light could be seen on the horizon. That happened to me sometimes. I would dream and then find myself unable to let it go as usual. Most of the time my dreams just fell away, like the leaves on a tree during the fall. Then sometimes I couldn't do anything but focus on the images I had seen in my sleep, and they were usually unpleasant ones. So there I was lying awake early on the morning of the thirteenth of November, two thousand and ten, an image of a raven flying over the sea all that was on my mind.

I looked to my left, and there my book was, leaning against the wall on the bed. "A Blue Dove for the Princess" I remembered then how late I had been up starring at the missing page that had torn a long time ago. Maybe too long ago to remember. A single line though perpetuated itself through my mind again and I felt the slight frustration again of going over it, over and over, and not remembering anything more of the story. I felt so far removed from those memories that sometimes it seemed like they never had existed at all. It's to be expected, I guess.

Not much had happened on the warfront for week since the deep air strike into Duga. It was much welcomed after the turmoil we had suffered in the days prior. There were still our duties to perform, but as Chopper put it, "These things are simpler than sleeping when you compare it to that operation."

The air strike had sent Yuktobania into a completely defensive poster. Without the supplies from the ammo dump most of the forces had to draw back, unable to keep the supply line, and assembled near the Jihachi Desert. It was great news for our invasion, but Yuktobania was still no where close to surrendering. And without that, the high officials in Oured had no intention of ending the war. Not a chance. That was the reality of it, and I lay there, wishing I could just forget it.

I grabbed my book, reached back and turned on my reading lamp. "If you can't sleep, try to get some work done," someone had once said to me. I flipped through the pages, taking a moment to admire the illustrations. I think that's what I most liked about the book from my childhood, the beautiful gowns of the princess, and the terrifying dark wings of the Razgriz. In a moment the story unfolded before my eyes, the loosely structured poetry retelling an old fairy tail. But while the story came to life so did my fatigue. How much did I sleep the previous night? Obviously not enough.

I looked to my clock…only one hour till the morning muster.

I had some comfort finding I wasn't the only one who had lost some sleep. Chopper had spent almost the entire night talking with Genett, about everything it seems, and subsequently was groggy and complained all throughout the entire morning. Grimm had also lost sleep. Not being an officer he had gotten stuck with the job of cleaning all the circuit breakers around the base, which no one had ever heard of being done, until the previous night. Blaze was the only one who seemed immune from the plague of tiredness. Then again, it was never easy to tell what he was feeling at any time, except when he was in the air. I wanted to talk to him, but I could never get more than few words. The weight he was carrying…I didn't understand it then.

In any event the day itself was not unusual at all, almost felt like the war had been suspended, and world was at peace once again. I was a vain hope though. Shortly after lunch we were informed that there was a briefing the next morning at 0610.

A black Raven flying over the icy Razgriz straights. I couldn't get the image from my mind still. I ended grabbing my book before heading to the briefing

We usually arrive a minute before it began, more often than not another officer was there holding several mission briefs that would be handed out to us when the briefing began. This time there wasn't. The only thing waiting for us was Genett, who is much preferred than any staff officer.

"Hey," He stood up from a chair waving.

"How did you know we were having a mission briefing?" Grimm asked him.

"Oh…well it was Hamilton. I wanted to talk to all four of you and he told me you'd be here," he responded.

"Well you're a fit replacement from our grumpy fat old geezer of a base commander. Much better looking too," Chopper joked, prompting some chuckles from everyone.

"They're not going to let you stay. You know that?" Blaze said to him.

"I know. I haven't had the opportunity to talk to you guys much since the hearings. It's been a rough time for all of you lately. How are you feeling?"

"Exhausted, that sums it up for me." Chopper said.

"I bet."

Exhaustion, the word itself made me tired. "We've been through a lot of battles lately…" I said, trying give a thoughtful answer. "More than any other squadron."

"Amen to that. We deserve some nice long leave. But do we get it? No. Not us?" Chopper commented.

"I'm just glad there aren't relocating us," Grimm spoke up. "I'd thought they'd send us to Yuktobania after the invasion."

"Don't count on that. They need us here so they can keep an eye on us. They think we'll defect if they send us an air base over there," Chopper responded. I had never thought about. Many squadrons were now operating from bases on the Yuktobanian mainland. Why not us?

"Do you really think the Military distrusts you that much?" Genett asked.

"I wouldn't put it past them. Hell they came that close to sending us to a firing squad," Chopper said. "Man I swear."

Genett sighed, almost as though the news was about him. "Blaze, what do you think?"

Blaze breathed deeply. "I don't know. There's two faces to it. On one hand they want to use us. They see us as assets to help them win the war. On the other they want us to disappear. I don't think they want any virtuous heroes in the wars."

"I see. So they don't trust you because of Captain Bartlett, but because of your skill, they'll use you as their trump card, their aces in the hole," Genett put it.

Blaze laughed a little bit. "That's a good way of putting it."

"Thank you."

"Yeah. And what the hell are they going to throw at us this time? I'm getting tired of these 'against all odds' missions."

The conversation died into silence, partly because of the early hour. A few minutes went by, and 0610 came and past with no one entering the Ready Room.

It didn't bother anyone. In fact I didn't even notice. I had barely sat down before my book was opened and my mind running over the images and words.

A Princess beautiful as the dawn lives in a white castle above the sea. One day stranger came from a far away place where the day meets the night, and time does not touch. To the Princess he gave a blue dove and she accepted it happily. The stranger warns her to feed the dove everyday and to let it out every night or the dove will die. The Princess promises to always feed the dove everyday and to let it out every night for she had come to love the dove and did not want it to die. She took the blue dove to the castle and showed it to the King. The King marveled over the beauty of the blue dove and ordered it to be kept in the tower so the whole world could enjoy its beauty. Prosperity came over the land and peace reigned. And the Princess made sure to feed the dove everyday, and let it free every night so that happiness may spread to all parts of the world. Razgriz awakening from the unfathomable depths of the endless twilight ascends from the iced covered horizon and sees the world. Anger rages in his heart and Razgriz took the form a dark demon, flying on great wings of black sheathes. Men fled before his shadow and he passed over the land, and death followed. Razgriz came to the white castle and his shadow passes over the Princess and she became sick.

That was the story as I could remember, A Blue Dove for the Princess, one of a myriad of stores about the Razgriz. I sat there trying to remember the exact words, the poetry that had been written so long ago. I wrote on line after the other, but nothing seemed right. I scratched it out and started again.

"Hey what are you writing there?" Grimm asked me. I was near 0615 and the briefing was yet to start.

"I just can't remember this next phrase," I replied.

"Here, lemme see," Chopper injected while trying to grab from me.

"Hey," I responded, snatching it back. "The Princess couldn't feed the dove that day. She was too sick…" I quoted, and I'll admit to being slightly embarrassed.

"May I take a look?" Grimm said.

I was expecting some joke when Chopper said much to my surprise, "Razgriz…The Demon of Razgriz got her right?"

"You know the story?" I said in a little shock.

"The demon from the north sea, my grandma used to tell me bedtime stories about it. And every time she did, I was too scared to go to the bathroom in the middle of the night."

"Uh," I groaned, knowing I should've expected a comment like that. I was still surprised. For along time I had thought I was the only one that still knew the story, little did I know.

The door opened in the front of the room and in stepped Captain Hamilton,

"Settle down people," Hamilton said as soon as he entered. He looked at Genett nodding, and Genett stood up and left the Ready Room. Two more people entered Colonel Perrault, and a Lt. Colonel we had never seen before, holding several folders under his arm marked classified. I glanced over and meet eyes with Blaze. He knew as well as I what was coming. Maybe Blaze was having the same dreams I was?

The room went quiet and the lights dimmed as the projector was activated. Behold the Razgriz, its wings of black sheath…

"Ahem," began the base commander, "Gentlemen…"

The new Lt. Colonel interrupted him. "Excuse me Colonel. This is an absolutely vital mission to us. As the Staff advisor sent from Central HQ for this effort, I'd like to explain it myself. The Osean Army is planning a vast offensive with the ultimate objective of occupying the capital of Yuktobania. If this operation succeeds, it will end the war in very sort order. However, the Yuktobanians have attacked our beachhead with ballistic missiles from the Hrimfaxi, a Scinfaxi-class submersible carrier stationed in the icy waters of Razgriz Straights. Fortunately our ground forces have already completed attack preparations. So despite the missile attack the offensive began as planned. Nevertheless we must neutralize the threat of another Hrimfaxi missile attack on our ground forces."

I dropped my book on the floor as he said that. Our past success against the Scinfaxi was hard bought. It almost went the other way, if not for Blaze.

He continued, "We have a single chance to stage a successful air attack on the underwater carrier Hrimfaxi. Our passive sonar has detected a transport submarine that we believe is headed for the Hrimfaxi. We believe the transport submarine's mission is to supply the Hrimfaxi with missiles. Based on its course and speed, we've calculated its rendezvous time with the Hrimfaxi. By amazing coincidence it is precisely the same time as the zero hour of our ground attack. At this time the Hrimfaxi will have to surface to restock its missiles. At that exact moment, ingress at low altitude to avoid detection, launch a surprise attack and sink the Hrimfaxi. Once surfaced it only takes the Hrimfaxi one minute to rig for an emergency dive. If your approach is detected, you will only have one minute to complete your attack on the Hrimfaxi."

One minute to complete an attack on submarine carrier. It took us several to sink the Scinfaxi.

"Now keep in mind, there won't be any support from Arkbird this time around. This mission rests solely on your shoulders. The entire ground forces is relying on this first surprise attack so don't disappoint them. I want you to turn the icy Razgriz Straights into the enemy's graveyard!"

The briefing adjourned and we were to suit up immediately fro the operation. The Hrimfaxi, if it was anything like its fallen cousin it would be armed with an intense anti-air battery, superior to our aegis destroyers. Not to mention, a fleet of carrier aircraft to sent up against us. We'd be fighting from air and bellow, without the aid of the Arkbird, white angel to us when we fought the Scinfaxi. I kept trying to convice myself it was possible, that we would succeed. The entire ground forces were depending on us. If that was true it didn't matter what I felt about our odds. It didn't matter what I felt about our abilities. It didn't matter that I felt as though there was a true demon waiting for us in the icy waters of the north sea. We had to succeed.

Pops already had the ground crew loading anti ship missile onto our planes when made out from the Ready Room to the tarmac. He seemed to sixth sense about what our missions were to be, and always preempted us. Thank God.

I gripped my helmet and walked out there trying to hide my anxiety over the mission, and everything else. "If it succeeds it will end the war in sort order." The words of that Lt. Colonel Mitchell ran through my head. "We can do this," I said to myself, blotting out the images of the nuggets losing their lives to Scinfaxi's missiles. It wasn't working too well.

Pop's himself was finishing the work on my plane when I got there, and tired not to look him in the eye.

"From the look on your face, I guess this must be pretty big."

"You could say that," I stepped onto the ladder. "If you ask me, it's near suicide."

"Hm, so it's the usual then?"

I couldn't help but chuckle at it. The usual, it was an i0ronic word for us.

"Yeah it is."

"Good luck. Anti-ship combat is the worst kind. If you ask me. But you know that already."

"Any advice?" I said looking back from the top of the ladder.

Pop's sighed a bit before he answered, "Just come back alive."

The name of the operation was Long Harpoon, fitting name considering the distance at which we were flying. It was almost seven thousand miles from Sand Island to the Razgriz Straights. Even in a fighter that shaped into a long and boring flight. But that's one of the few things in flying that you get used too, somewhat at least.

Razgriz…I couldn't get the story out of my head. I kept imaging a great black hawk flying over the water toward Osea, toward me. It probably was just the stress of the operation. As Mitchell had said, "This mission entirely rests on your soldiers." But I still couldn't shake the fear I was feeling, the fear of what was to come.

We had to refuel once before reaching the Razgriz Straights, it was the last time we would be near Osean territory for awhile afterward, near enough to be rescued if need be. If any thing goes wrong with our planes…well we had to hope nothing happened. The water began to fill with ice, first a few patches of mirror-like plates to, eventually, where entirely square miles of water were covered. The Razgriz Straights were practically in the Northern Pole. No wonder the Yukes thought it a good area to hide there "demons."

Razgriz, the demon from the North Sea. I felt like he was waiting for us out there. A monster in the water, hungry for blood…

"Wardog, stay at low altitude and fly toward the submarine fleet," Thunderhead said to us when we neared the target area. The Hrimfaxi wasn't alone out there. There was a fleet of escort subs supporting, no doubt sporting significant anti-air weapons. I guess it couldn't be that easy. "You're restricted from flying over 1,000 feet. We can't risk our surprise attack being detected."

"Roger that Thunderhead," Blaze responded.

"I'm getting chills," Chopper began. "This northern sea is where the Demon of Razgriz came from."

"It's just fairy tail Chopper," Blaze said.

"Yeah I know…" Chopper broke off as if startled.

It was twilight by that time. Looking over the see I couldn't help it. I saw it again the Razgriz flying over the water, on wings of black sheath.

"Razgriz…"

Chopper came back on channel, "Heh, there's no way that coulda been the Razgriz."

"Hold your chatter. Commencing comm. out procedures shortly. Maintain radio silence," Thunderhead ordered.

"Guess I'll cut off the mic and try talking to myself," Chopper said, and there was a buzzing noise as he switched off his communications.

It was like flying alone then. No one to talk or listen too.

"Focus forward Kei," I said. "Focus forward." A flight instructor I had at Hierelark said it once. He was lecturing us how had to always keep eyes open when taxing after one trainee had crashed into a plane ahead of him on the ground. He said it almost in passing, by I never forgot it. It even helped me motivate myself from some written tests I had latter on.

"Focus forward." There was a channel through the ice that ran all the way to a small island, almost like a river. It made for some surreal scenery. I bet no where else in world looked like the Razgriz, Straights. Maybe there was a reason for that? Maybe?

"Focus forward." I tried controlling my breathing. A high school teacher told me about it when I was preparing for an Advanced Placement Exam. It helps relieve stress. Supposedly people mediated using controlled breathing. Supposedly…it never really worked for me.

"Just come back alive." I wouldn't die I knew that. Something told me that. Some part of me knew for certain, but what about the rest of me? And what about my friends?

"I won't die sir." I had said to Captain Bartlett once. Missiles were on my tail and he saved me, getting himself captured in the process. Protecting me.

"Nagase, if you keep flying like that you'll die real soon." I almost did. I felt unable to do anything, the Princess as the Razgriz came. All my fellow trainees in the sky with me that day, that would never return to the ground. The metal rain…It wouldn't happen again. I would make sure of that. I would protect Osea and everyone I held dear.

I won't die.

I was almost calm when radio silence was suddenly broken. "This is Lt. Colonel Mitchell, the advisor to HQ. That picket submarine just sent off an enemy detection notice. The Hrimfaxi's going to dive in one minute. Attack immediately!"

"Hey, our cover's blown anyway. I'm gonna start talking now," Chopper said.

"Dammit! Full throttle everyone. We have to hit the Hrimfaxi before it dives," Blaze ordered.

I grabbed the throttle, almost slamming it against the flight consol, and the cockpit began to vibrate with the noise of the after burners. My F-18 accelerated like a bullet, nearing the sound barrier in few moments. It was going to be dangerous. Attacking at that speed meant a good chance of plaguing the fighter into a sheet the ice of the Razgriz Straight, and a cold death. It's possible though and we had no choice. We all armed for firing at the target; hopefully it would be a missile and not one of us.

"Once you fire pull the stick up as hard as you can," Blaze said.

"Roger that kid. I didn't come all the way out here to go for a swim," Chopper replied.

There was a large in the ice ahead. A small island sat in the center. Looking closely I could see it, the Hrimfaxi, lying like massive leviathan in the water. "Focus forward."

"30 seconds to Hrimfaxi dive!" Thunderhead stated. It was going to be close. The numbers on the HUD began to cycle down faster, and then went red. Lock.

"We're in range. Firing!" Blaze shouted. I felt the jolt of the missile launch and pitched up and left, the Hrimfaxi dropping behind the nose of my fighter. I rolled right, decreasing my throttle while turning back to the Hrimfaxi, just in time to see tracer fire, and then missile impacts on its hull. We hit it! But how badly?

"Damage status on enemy sub unknown!" I said.

The Hrimfaxi moved away from the transport sub that was re-supplying it, slowly disappearing beneath the water.

"Those bastards are diving," Chopper shouted!

The Hrimfaxi disappeared, and suddenly we had to deal with a mess of anti-aircraft fire from the escort subs. "Dammit!" I heard Blaze say again. "Everyone get to higher altitude."

"Roger that Captain," Grimm responded.

"I hear that!" Chopper shouted.

I began to hear the pounding of flak in the air. Things were just getting worse for us. I lost track of Blaze as he evaded, and flew to two thousand feet to try to get grip on the situation. The IFF showed maybe a dozen submarines, and I bet all of them were surfaced to protect the Hrimfaxi.

"Blaze?"

"I'm right bellow you." I looked down, and his plane slowly rose into view. "Hell of a party. AWACS, requesting instructions."

"Stand by. We're analyzing the situation."

"Yeah just stand by! You're not the one being shot at," Chopper unhappily responded.

"It's like all they've concentrated all their subs in one area. There's so many," Grimm commented.

"Really? I didn't notice!" Chopper replied.

A tracer round flashed passed my plane, sending a jolt of adrenaline through my body and I rolled hard left to avoid any more fire. It was a small cannon on an attack sub escorting the Hrimfaxi, one that had just surfaced. I began to wonder how many ships were bellow the ice that we couldn't get to.

It was only moments since we had struck the Hrimfaxi, but it felt as long as an hour with all the commotion we circled above maintaining formation as best we could. It didn't matter though if the Hrimfaxi never surfaced again. It was past zero hour of the ground forces offensive; we were out of time.

The radio began to buzz slightly; it was picking up the enemy communications. "This is Submarine Squadron Command; we have an emergency report from our ground forces on the front lines. The enemy is undertaking a large-scale offensive. Attack the enemy forces with long-range missiles from the Hrimfaxi. Urgent! Transmitting target coordinates."

My chest tightened at the enemy's words.

"This is Hrimfaxi we cannot comply. We are unable to launch missiles underwater due to battle damage."

"What's the point of your existence if you don't fire now? They're running through our defense forces as we speak! Hurry up before they overrun our allies!"

"Emergency surface! Grab onto something!" One Yuke seaman said.

"Once we break the surface, launch the missiles and unmanned drones," another seaman commanded.

It wasn't going down. They still were going to fight even with that damage, and a sure risk of aerial attack from their enemy. I suppose their superiors treated them the same way.

I inverted, letting gravity drab my plane to a lower altitude before leveling. I had to find it. I had to stop it from firing those burst missiles on our forces. Not again. In the blue water I saw the black silhouette of the antenna. There it was.

"The Hrimfaxi antenna has appeared above water. It's surfacing," I said, and so it did. A white column arose and the gargantuan body of the submersible carrier, missiles in its belly. Another white column fired from the Hrimfaxi a moment after.

"Hrimfaxi launching burst missile!" Thunderhead shouted.

Three more white columns erupted, small than the first.

"Launching carrier jets," I reported, and my IFF alerted me to the new enemy contacts, an unknown aircraft type, not exactly what we needed at that point in time.

I pitched up, flying back to rejoin the others. Our surprise attack had disintegrated, but we still had no choice. So it was no surprise tome when Mitchell came back on.

"This is Lt Colonel Mitchell, the advisor to HQ. I'm getting your info in real time from our tracker satellite. Time your attack to hit the Hrimfaxi when it surfaces. Sink it before it does any more damage to our ground forces with its missiles."

"Well that sounds easily. I'm getting a little déjà vu here." Chopper commented.

"Alright. Let's hold off on engaging the escorts. We have to sink the Hrimfaxi," Blaze said with a subtle urgency in his voice.

"Roger that," Grimm said immediately. I looked for his plane and found bearing down on that monster, imperfect firing position. "I'm in range Captain. Firing!" The missile dropped off theF-18's wing, igniting a flaming tail and plummeting toward the Hrimfaxi. "Missile hit!"

"Nice shot Grimm!" I screamed, imaging the missile penetrating the hull and destroying those burst missiles. I was a little bit too hopeful though. The Hrimfaxi began to submerge itself under the water again.

"C'mon surface! I'm sick of waiting for you!" Chopper yelled.

"If we can just do this," Grimm said. "If we can sink the Hrimfaxi those bursts missiles will go away too."

"Yeah, and if we can eliminate the threat of that metal rain the war could end early," I replied.

"And then we can go on leave. It's perfect!" Chopper added.

"The deed's not done yet," Blaze reminded us. "We have to sink it first."

"Roger that kid. I was giving us a little more incentive."

"Yeah…alright, let's spread out and hunt this beast." His tone made it sound almost an old medieval foxhunt.

"I'll take care of the threat from the escort subs too," I said.

"Just waste your missiles. Break!"

I pulled away, forming into a hard right with the icy water on my right and the twilight sky on my left. There were three subs in my field of vision alone, none of which were large enough to be the Hrimfaxi. I thought it might hide forever waiting for the right moment shoot. Red streaks of light began to fly toward me, as the gunners on the escort submarines opened fire.

I inverted up, falling low enough to almost skim the surface of the water. Not quite low enough to be out of range of the gunners, but close. I switched to anti-ship combat, waited for the radar to lock on and fired, hitting the throttle to avoid the AA fire that was still coming, and then stopped. One down, but there still was more to deal with. And no sign of the Hrimfaxi.

Thunderhead's voice came over the radio. "The Hrimfaxi's broken the surface. Commence attack!"

I looked on the IFF and there was the massive contact. Sitting right bellow me. I felt a sudden jolt of panic, followed by a cold anger. I pitched straight up, flying to two thousand feet and then let pointed my nose back toward the blue water. I swathe white streak of another missile. "No." I pushed my throttle, accelerating with fantastic speed toward the Hrimfaxi. I fired, almost before the radar had locked. That might not have mattered since I was flying straight down at it, way faster than basic tactics stated for dive bombing. Way too steep for most to stay conscious. "No."

"Nagase if you keep flying like that you'll die real soon!"

I pulled the down the throttle as hard as I could and pulled up. My nose was still pointed toward the sea. "No." I barely made it. My hornet must only been no more than fifty feet over the water, close enough to hear the splash of the water as the force of the air pressure passed over it.

"Nagase!" Blaze said.

"That was a bit crazy," Chopper commented. And he was right. I didn't care though.

Radio chatter from the enemy increased. I must have done some damage then.

"We've taken damage. How many planes do they have out there? There can't only be four!"

"Just take your position! Don't disgrace this ship!"

"Hrimfaxi launching burst missile." Thunderhead said again.

"How many times do we have to hit it?" Chopper commented.

"I can't believe their damage control ability. It still isn't sinking," Grimm said with visible stress in his voice.

"It's diving again."

I pulled m plane around to look back, trying to see what damage I had caused it. It obviously wasn't enough to sink it. Before the Hrimfaxi completely submerged it launched three more aircraft, the same unknown type as before. They launched vertical, circling each other before changing vector, coming head on toward me. My radar warning engaged soon after. "Dammit!" I accelerated, flying just under then unknown at high speed, and got a good look too. They appeared to be heavily modified F-16's, many of the usual features removed or shortened. Turning back around could see the topside as it did the same. There was no pilot. They were unmanned drones.

"Blaze, the enemy aircraft are UAV's."

"That explains some of the funky evasion maneuvers these things have. It's like those ones we shot down when the war began," Chopper responded. "Except these ones are armed. Ahhh." A UAV began to engage him.

"We can't play around with these things," Blaze said, and in my mind I thought of Captain Bartlett. He then shot down one of the UAV's himself. "Where is it?"

I scanned around frantically for any sign of its antenna. It was probably shear luck I spotted it from the air the first time. The light was continuing to fade. If night fell, it would only make things much harder for. And with each successful launch more of our ground forces died. With each launch more pilots lost there lives. Pilots like us.

"Hrimfaxi the enemy has abandoned the attack. Well done," it was that same Yuktobanian commander as before.

"What are you doing!?" Colonel Mitchell suddenly yelled over the radio. "Attack you idiots! Are you going just to let them destroy our ground forces?"

"Geez, I thought this guy would be nicer than our base commander at home." Chopper lamented.

"Aw, the top brass are all the same," Grimm replied.

All the same, but nonetheless, people were dying out there each time one of your missiles didn't score a critical hit, people that shouldn't have to. I began to fell a bit of desperation. It we didn't destroy it, the war may never end. I knew that in my heart, and I couldn't accept it.

Behold the Razgriz, its wings of black sheathe…I saw the dream again, a massive black phantasm raining death from the sky. I saw the shadow then lurking under the water. The Hrimfaxi, maybe they really were the Razgriz?

I was shaken back to life by a bullet striking some part of my aircraft, and if my heart wasn't racing before it was then. My HUD indicated the damage, and I turned and evaded. There was another escort on my nine-a-clock low, a large one. Two mounted guns on the deck opened fire, and I pushed the throttle, flying high to evade. Then flew back around, locking on with one of my three remaining missiles. The missile struck aft, sending a small tower of water into the air above. At least there was one less of those to worry about.

"The Hrimfaxi is surfacing. I'm in range," Blaze said.

I raised altitude, flying over to assist Blaze, and just in time to see his missile make it through the Hrimfaxi's phalanx defense battery. The batteries ceased for a moment after impact.

"Ballast tanks damaged! Unable to submerge," one crewman shouted.

"What! How is this possible? There are only a few enemy planes up there. Are the Oseans using some kind of black magic?"

"Forget it. We'll just have to deal with them on the surface.

That was some good news at last.

"The Hrimfaxi stopped its dive, we've damaged it!" Grimm shouted, sounding jubilant.

"Alright, we have to finish it off now. We're running out of time," Blaze said, and we all knew what he meant. We all had been engaging the UAV and the escort subs, and immediately stopped. The threat from them was inconsequential. The Hrimfaxi put everything it had into air defense, turning the sky above it into a red nightmare of tracers and missiles. And that wasn't all.

"Dammit, just whither away and die already!" Chopper yelled.

"Hrimfaxi launching burst missile. Wardog it's heading your way!"

"Not again!" My fuel was low, and getting lower with the maneuvers we were doing. There was no choice though. Full throttle, and the noise of the after burners rolled through the cockpit, and the force of the acceleration pushed my face back into my helmet. All the tiny beads of sweat and blood left my face by the time I hit five thousands feet. Then flash of the missile separation bellow me, followed by the deafening sound and oddly beautiful glow of the explosion.

"Blaze? Chopper?"

"I'm fine Nagase. Grimm and Blaze made it up too. It was a bit close though. Man…"

"We don't have any support from the Arkbird. Are we gonna be alright?" Grimm asked.

"Of course we will. I'm not letting this thing take me or any of you down," Chopper responded.

I spied Chopper's plane few thousand feet from me, Grimm not far behind. Blaze passed right by nose, and then came to settle on my wing. He barely made it that time. Black scorch marks ran along the tip of the wings and the back of the ailerons. He was lucky. There didn't appear to be any structural damage. "Blaze?"

"I'm alright. I just got cooked a little. We need to finish this."

I looked down toward the source the glowing tracers. The source of all this. "Yeah."

"We'll destroy the Hrimfaxi…this time. We'll have to split up and attack from all sides."

"Sounds like a plan," I said.

We broke off yet again. Flying in a large circle around the Hrimfaxi, They managed to get one more missile into the air. They were going to fight to their last breath, and with the tenacity of a demon. The cloud of fire and dissipated and plunge down into a dive, the negative g-forces making me feel lighter than the feather. I flew down and leveled off over the water, and the guns from the Hrimfaxi began to fire in earnest at me. I kept straight.

"Focus forward." I remembered our basic instruction on attacking ships. "Stay low on the horizon and don't try too many fancy evasions." The distance from target cycled down. "Focus forward." The death the Hrimfaxi had rained on others. All the suffering it was causing on the front lines. And to us.

"Razgriz…" The demon from the land of fairy tales. The Hrimfaxi, it had rained death over the entire war, along with the Scinfaxi. A dark demon from the northern sea, striking fear into the hearts of is enemies, and I was truly afraid of it no longer. The target locked. " Edge firing!"

I pulled up through the tracer fire, narrowly missing a direct hit. Chopper, Grimm and Blaze also fired. We left nothing in our arsenal, all our anti-ship were in the air the air and on target. I turned back toward the Hrimfaxi. Explosions erupted through the air as the phalanx fire hit some of our missiles, but they couldn't hit all of them. Four hit the hull of Hrimfaxi in blazing crescendo of light. A death blow, finally.

"Missiles hit."

We formed up and circled back to confirm. The Hrimfaxi was sinking slowly beneath the waves.

"Yes," I said to myself. In final reckoning, the beast is slain.

Additional explosions came from the hull, and the crew began to abandon ship.

My head buzzed, partly because of the euphoria. "We did it." I had to keep telling myself to believe it. Against all odds, all mistakes and all malice, we had succeeded. It was probably the greatest victory we would have of the war, and we seemed to know it.

We heard an enemy communication shortly before returning to base. Something I'll never forget. "Hrimfaxi, it appears you're up against Razgriz itself out there."

"Looks like they were the real Razgriz, not us."

"Maybe someone's trying to tell us that our time is up."

The second line of that poem comes to mind: Out of a ripple of change shall the storm rise.

(A/N) I want all of you to know that my soul dies inside me when you don't review.

-Stonehenge


	20. Ice Cage

Fire

Cold.

An icy wind passed over my face, my arms, and my chest. It was painfully cold, and I couldn't resist my body's urge to shiver. My lungs felt contracted, and my breathing became staccato with each breath, giving me a true feeling of paralysis.

I was standing alone, alone in a forest in what must have been the dead of winter, and not nearly dressed for the occasion. I had nothing on but the white undershirt I wore beneath my flight suite, and the loose-fitted military pants I wore when off duty. It was fine for Sand Island, but horribly inadequate for where I was. My feet were also bare. I could feel the powdered snow melt between my toes, and the pain that came from prolonged contact with ice. They began to turn shades of purple and bright red. I knew that soon if I didn't act, I would lose them to the cold.

The wind blew again, and again I struggled to control my shivering and breathing. I looked around, there nothing but snow covered trees around. Didn't matter, I had to make due, or I would die there.

Walking was yet more painful, my feet felt rigid enough that if I tired to run they would snap like twigs, not that I could run. I walked on, the wind flying in my face and all traces of hope began to dwindle in a deep self-pity. What had I done wrong?

I walked on with my head bent low, not wanting to see anything. So I just looked at the next patch of snow before my feet, only occasionally looking up to see where I was going. After some undetermined amount of time my heart seemed to skip with every step, as though I was trying to drag some immense weight. I knew I didn't have much time left. I, Kei Nagase, was going to freeze.

I saw something in the snow just ahead of me, and my eyes went wide in fear because I knew exactly what it was, blood.

It shown clearly against the snow, a crimson river slowly flowing. The wind had stopped but it was no longer needed to take my breath away. The sight of the blood flowing freely. It took a moment for me to do anything in response. And then I finally noticed where its source was, a tree just ahead and to my right. I followed the stream of gore to the base on the side. It seemed like the tree itself was bleeding, but I knew it wasn't. There was something on the other side.

I didn't want to go. I didn't want to see it, but something told me that I had no other choice, none at all. I walked slowly trying to avoid stepping my bare feet, but I had lost too much coordination from the cold, and looking behind I could see my own bloody foot prints following me.

It seemed to take an age to walk what wasn't more than ten feet, and for I knew it did. But I faced it, and felt the horror of the dreadful sight.

It was a person. A person, and for a moment that's all I could fathom. A person slumped dead against the trunk of the tree was the source of the crimson stream in the snow. I found my nerve then, and walked forward toward the corpse. It was a woman, wearing the uniform of a pilot. Getting closer I could see the seal of the Osean Air Defense Force, a sister in flight. The horror I felt began to be mitigated then by the pity I felt for her, even though she was a stranger to me.

Still shivering I felt a new resolve and advanced on the body. I had to take care of it. Even though I had nothing with me, I felt I had to give some semblance of respect. Though in the back of my mind, I knew I might soon join her. I walked forward, closer and I saw then the reason she was dead. Her hands had been clasped around something on her belly, that in the cold and distance I couldn't make out, but then was clearly visible.

A sword!

My heart began to beat faster, almost like I was running a marathon. My shivering began to get even more severe at the truth of what I saw. Her had hands clasped around its hilt and the blade run through her. She had done it! In that icy forest she had killed herself.

I wanted to run, but I didn't. Something compelled me forward. Closer to her till I was about a foot away. Why had she done this, I wanted to know. I looked to her right breast to see her name and her rank.

And there I read…Lt. K. Nagase.

I was in shock for a moment, numb to everything, the cold of the wind on my skin and the snow beneath my feet. It was like I had been shot. But it was only a moment before I was gripped by shear terror. Kei Nagase! I laid there against the tree! I had taken that sword and run myself through! I had killed myself!

My eyes watered, and I found the sense to run when one hand reanimated, flying from the hilt and grabbed me by the throat. The head rose from its slumped position and the brown hair fell away revealing the face underneath. My face! It rose to meet mine and there its eyes opened. Two grey and dead eyes…

It was a second before I realized I was in my quarters. Everything I had seen was gone, the face, the blood, the snow and the forest; only my bed, my desk next to it and the pale orange light from the lamps outside. My heart still pounded and I still was shivering despite the fact it was a warm seventy-five degrees inside the room.

It was all a dream. There was no corpse in front of me. I knew there was no hand clasped around my neck. Yet I still was afraid.

"Why is this happening to me?"

I suddenly realized why some people fear to fall asleep, first hand. Even though I was awake, the memory was still frightening me. I could still see the contrast of the blood on the snow, and my dead body killed by my own hands. I could still feel the cold of the wind and shortness of my breath.

There was a frantic knock at my door. "Lt. Nagase are you alright?" It was one of the night patrolman, Sergeant Keats. Had I been making that much noise? He knocked again when I didn't answer. "Lt. Nagase?" I could hear him shuffling for his key to my door.

"I'm fine."

I looked at the clock. It was four in the morning, the seventeenth of November.

Our sinking of the Hrimfaxi caused quite a sensation around the base, the good kind of sensation. We landed late enough for most of the base to already be asleep, but they didn't stay asleep for long. The base MP's of all people went around in their humvee's announcing the success over the loud speakers and people started to pile onto the tarmac, many of whom weren't even wearing pants.

It was fun but short lived. Before long the base commander came out and told everyone to "can it" till the morning.

He seemed pretty livid about it too. "You're all excited. I can see that," he said. "But save it till tomarrow for the actual party." It was the only time I would actually witness applause for him. He seemed in good spirits, but as soon as the debriefing began, he called us incompetent for allowing so many missiles to get to hit the ground forces. Never mind the ones that were fired at us. By that time we didn't care though.

True to his word though, there was a party the next day for us. The ground crews took it upon themselves to organize it. There really wasn't much that could be done though. As long as Osea was at war, Sand Island sat alert for Yuktobanian air raids. That didn't stop us though. With the sinking we all thought the war would end early, and we'd be able to go on leave for once in four months. That's what we hoped anyway.

It had begun at around 1900 hours, just after sunset, and the crew recreation room filled up quickly that most of the people were pushed outside. Chopper included, Lynx and Wizard had been transferred a few days before we'd left for Oured to frontline bases in Yuktobania, and two other squadrons of nuggets were sent to replace them. Chopper took the opportunity to tell them in detail every mission we had been on, and almost every plane we had shot down. I ended up inside chatting with the maintenance crews and some of the control tower staff that had been there since we had first stepped on Sand Island. Something I should've done more often.

"I'm glad to see you guys back here," one of the control tower officers was saying. "Each time you go out I get nervous they'll start bombing us again and actually destroy this base."

"There's still pilots here."

"Yeah, but I've seen a lot of squadrons come through and none of them come close to you guys. I mean really. You guys, not the army, are gonna win this war for us."

"…thank you."

"Seriously," one of the mechanics began, after taking a sip of whatever he was drinking. "All four of you are aces. All of you! I mean what other squadron in the world can say that?" He took another sip.

"Well…" I tired to say.

"You four are the best. All of us know it, even if the old grouch doesn't."

"Thanks."

I ended up walking away while they talked amongst themselves about us. The praise was flattering, but I still felt uncomfortable. Did they really expect us to win the war for them? Were we going to have to beat the impossible on every sortie?

I began to walk out, and someplace to be alone with my thoughts for a moment, when I ran into Blaze, who was standing by the door, leaning on a table that once housed a cake that was cut to pieces only a few moments after the party began. He looked as if he was preparing to escape as well.

"You trying to leave? Is it too much happiness for you?" He joked.

"Ha," I said sitting down next to him. "I least I lasted longer than you."

"Yeah you did. Honestly, there were so many toasts I had to get away before I got drunk. I don't know if you noticed but someone spiked the punch."

I looked down to the cup I had been carrying. "I noticed. There's nothing wrong with that though."

"No not really," he finished off the cup he had been drinking. "I'm still wondering how the mechanics hide their 'stuff' so well."

"Yeah." Someone had brought in a stereo and began to blast some rock music throughout the room, causing some protest. "How's it goin'?"

"I'm alright for the most part. I did have a round of insomnia for a few days."

"You couldn't sleep?"

He shook his head. "It was only a few nights."

"Still," I started but I had nothing else to say. It wasn't by far the first time a pilot was losing sleep.

"What about you? How is Kei Nagase holding up?" he asked me.

I laughed a bit. "I've been having some strange dreams." The stereo began to get louder as some of the junior officers came back in. "Face of the Coin," that was the name of the song being played.

"Dreams?"

"Blaze, do you believe in the Demon of Razgriz?"

He starred at me for a moment, his fire-like eyes as sharp as they ever had been. "I used to believe nothing was determined, that things just happened according to a certain probability." He sighed deeply. "Now after all that has happened, I'm not so sure. Sometimes it seems like the story is coming true, a fairy tale merging with reality. Maybe I do believe in the Demon of Razgriz. "

"Yeah."

"Did that answer your question?" he asked me.

I allowed a faint smile. "Well enough."

We sat for a moment not saying anything, listening to the music and looking around the room at all our fellow soldiers. I wondered, did they really believe we had the power to end the war?

Blaze stood up and took the plastic cup from my hand. "You and I need another drink."

"Yeah, I think so too." And we proceeded to get drunk.

We all were in good spirits for the most part. Everyone for the first time in a while felt optimistic about the future, as opposed to when the war began. I was optimistic. Hearing everyone's faith and praise gave me some hope, much needed hope. Maybe the Razgriz isn't in flight? Maybe it was just my imagination over those icy waters?

Then why was I having nightmares?

"Lt. Nagase?"

"I'm fine," I said, despite the fact I was still shaking. The door unlocked and Sergeant Keats rushed in, leaning his rifle against the wall.

"Lieutenant?" He walked to my bedside, knelling down and then pausing, unsure what he should do. "Ma'am I think you should go to the medical ward."

"No, I'm fine." A chill came over more again, as if I was still there in the snow.

Keats put his hand on my forearm; I guess he was trying to calm me down. "Lieutenant please." He looked at me with genuine concern in his eyes, and I realized how bad I must have looked.

"Ok."

The medical ward was short of an obscure place on Sand Island. It was at far end of administration on the opposite side from the runway. In my entire time at the base I had only gone there a handful of times, never that early, except this one time. It was a place no liked to go, myself included.

I sat on one of the examination tables in the room, which was dimly lit in the early hour. I never had noticed how small it was. There were only six tables, each sectioned off by a curtain. Guess they never expected many casualties when the base was constructed. I wondered how overcrowded it got when the Yuktobanians tried to invade. The on-duty nurse came in soon, gave me a straight physical, took some blood and left, like it was any other part of the day. By that time my shaking had stopped, I was starting to calm down, the images of the blood leaving my mind

The door to the hall opened, and he walked in, the Chief Medical Officer to the base. I had only spoken to him once before, on the psychological screening as part of flight training. It wasn't something I enjoyed either.

"A four-thirty in the morning medical call. You certainly know how to pick to convenient times Lieutenant."

"Sorry."

"Ah it's okay," he walked over, reading over a clipboard almost inundated with documents. "So I'm comfortably sleeping in my bed, dreaming of beautiful Sapinese women, when Sergeant Keats rudely bangs on my door, telling me that there is a medical emergency. Of course I think there has been an attack, and soldier's bowels are spilling onto the floor, so I rush down to find you sitting comfortably on my examination table."

My hands gripped the cushion of the table more tightly. I almost preferred the base commander to him. "I'm sorry it's so early."

"I told you it's okay. So what happened?"

"I had a dream…"

"Just a dream?" I glared at him. "Keats said that you were 'near hysterical' and 'shaking uncontrollably.' Does that happen often after your dreams?"

"No."

"Okay."

"It was…" I had stop myself from lashing out at him. I put my head in my hands. "It was just a bad dream."

"Yeah I'd say that," He flipped through the clipboard again, reading several lines before looking back to me. "Unless I actually flunked out of medical school, you had what we in medicine call a night terror."

"A nightmare?"

"Yes, in the way a cat is like a tiger. You have nightmares all the time, you just don't know it most of the time. Night terrors occur in your REM sleep, and very often patients bolt up suddenly, scream, wave their arms every which way. There's at least one case where a husband throttled his wife during one." He grabbed a stool that had been sitting under the examination table, and sat down in front of me. "Basically a person is in a state of extreme panic, of which they cannot be comforted."

"I had one?"

"Oh yeah. Your pulse was one-forty and you were sweating bullets when you came in here."

A night terror, it was an appropriate name I guess. I looked down to my hands, the same hands that had run myself through.

"So…" He began.

"So what?"

"So what was it about? I can only tell that you had a bad dream."

I didn't want to tell. I wasn't sure if it was because I didn't like him, or because I didn't want to relive it. Swallow your pride Nagase.

"I was alone." My heart started to skip.

"Yeah?" He was starring at me with intent eyes.

"Uh…" I couldn't tell. I remembered having the same sensation once before, when I told my mother I was going to join the military.

"You were alone," he said. "Where were you?"

"…I was in a forest. And it was snowing. There was snow everywhere."

"What did you see in the snow?"

A crimson stream contrasting against the white. "There was blood."

"And where was the blood coming from?"

"It was a tree. There was a body lying against it. I went up to see what happened and I saw…" I read on the corpse's breast, Lt. K Nagase.

"Who was the person?"

I looked at my hands, and I saw clasped around the hilt of the sword, stained red.

I took a deep sigh, as if to prepare myself. "It was me."

He had no reaction, just nodded, almost like he had known it all before. He stood suddenly walked in circle. I got the impression something was wrong

"Does it mean anything?" I asked.

"It might."

"Might?"

"Yeah. I'm a trauma, not a sleep specialist."

I felt a bit betrayed. "So you don't know?"

"Well if I had to guess. You're suffering from acute amount of stress, and there is a war going on. So you're blaming yourself for something."

"What?" I said, bringing my head level to his.

He began to walk toward the door, stopping and turning back to me. "You want some coffee. I'm gonna run and get us some." The statement almost sent me into shock for a moment. I couldn't believe his behavior. I still have never met a doctor who treated his patients so rashly. I felt like I was back in front of the interrogation committee in Oured.

He took five minutes to get back, true to his word, with two freshly made cups of coffee.

"Here you go." He handed me my glass, sitting down on the same stool. "So let's talk some more. How's the squadron been doing?"

Did he really have to ask? "We've been doing fine."

"Good, and how are your wingman? Are they taking their fair share?"

I rolled my eyes. "What kind of question is that?"

He put up his hands in defense. "Sorry. How about Blaze though? I've been hearing some things about him."

Why was he asking me about Blaze?

"Blaze is…" I couldn't find the words. "…He's the best pilot I've seen."

He nodded in same ay as before. "He's your flight lead right?"

"Yeah."

He nodded again. "How about Jack Bartlett?"

Captain Bartlett, the name seemed to echo in my head as he said it. "Why?" I gripped cushion on the examining table, almost tearing pieces out of it.

"It's just a question."

"I'm not blaming myself for Captain Bartlett!"

"I never said you were."

"He bailed out on his own! He might have made it back to base, and then that intelligence ship wouldn't have captured him and none of this…" It almost like I had lost consciousness. The words came out of nowhere, like it wasn't me talking but someone else. I realized I had stood up over the Chief Medical Officer, and sat back down.

He calmly took a sip of his coffee. "You sure you don't want to tell me about Captain Bartlett?"

My head was spinning, and needed to get some fresh air. "We're done here." I put on my shoes and my jacket I had worn there intent on storming out when he called me.

"Lt. Nagase," I turned he was holding that clipboard up towards me. He took off the top paper, showing the front to me. My name was written on it. "This is a medical evaluation I fill out any time someone comes to see me. I am required to give these all to Captain Hamilton so that he and Colonel Perrault can make decisions on who's fit for duty." He took the sheet, tore it, then threw it into a bin labeled medical waste. "Don't think I don't know what's going on. And I don't appreciate what you're doing. Really, it must take a lot of courage and tenacity to survive up there. Heaven forbid that one of you may regret something." I starred at him, completely dumfounded by what he did. Then he smiled at me. "Good morning Lieutenant. What can I do for you?"

"…nothing. Thank you."

"Okay. Good luck."

I had to rethink my image of him after this. I had thought him as a haughty MD, who had little regard for respect. I thought he didn't care about anyone but himself. The truth is, he cares so much that he doesn't give a damn about being nice to them.

I spied a clock on my way out. It was five in the morning, the seventeenth of November. The sun was just begging to rise. It would be a clear, however that night we were due to get heavy rain. That wasn't anything new though.

There was another briefing that morning at 1000 hours. I guess I wasn't going to get a break.

In short everything was going well for Osea in the war. The sinking of Hrimfaxi and the success of Osean air power gave the ground forces the cover they needed for rapid advancement into enemy territory. Nearly all the Sonza plains now were under Osean control, and Yuktobania was pulling all its forces in the Jihachi, determined not to let us advance any more. Headquarters I guess wanted to keep morale high, because our next mission was, in a way, a mass rescue operation.

The briefing began normally, nothing interesting notable, then again they always do. The base commander didn't even say a word that time. Hamilton handled the entire thing. "Our ground offensive is continuing its fast paced push into Yuktobanian soil. A POW interment camp was discovered during the offensive, and a team of marines has attacked and captured the camp."

A POW camp? I tried not to think about it. After that morning I didn't want to hear his name, but I couldn't help it.

Hamilton continued. "The marines have secured the camps radio room and a flight of helicopters is enroute to retrieve the prisoners. That being said your mission is to provide close air support to this rescue and retrieval operation."

"Well this is more like it," Chopper commented softly.

"The radio room could be retaken by the enemy at any moment. If it is, the enemy will report the attack and the rescue will end in failure. So there's need for speed on this operation. You must find and shoot down all enemy aircraft in the local airspace and secure air superiority across the entire area." He turned off the projector, and hit the lights. "Well that's it people. This operation is code named 'Back Haul.' You should equip for both air and ground targets. This is as straight forward as they come." He went on say more things, but I wasn't really listening by that point. I'm usually a better student than that.

Glubina, that was the region we were going. It was a tundra region on the South –Eastern edge of the Vladimir Mountains, a cold and hellish place this time of the year, nothing but snow, trees and permafrost. The worst spot imaginable to captured, or sent to. It seemed a crime in itself for the Yukes to build a prison camp there, to make people suffer like that. I guess it was poetic justice for us to liberate it.

I ended up lagging behind for a moment, picking up a small globe someone had left in the corner of the Crew Ready Room. It turned it till the landscape changed, from the Osean Continent, the Ceres Osean, and then the Verusian Continent and the Union of Yuktobanian Republics. Glubina…

"Maybe he is." I said to myself, running my finger over the bumps that represented the Vladimir Mountains. "Captain…" I didn't need any more convincing. We had to help those people. No one should have to freeze like that.

I needed to help those people.

It was going to be a fast push into Yuktobania, even compared to our previous mission. Without close air support the marines would likely be unable to hold the camp, must less get out of there. So we had to fly at Mach 2 the entire way, and loaded as much fuel as possible without sacrificing too much armament. It seemed like no time at all and we were in the thick of the icy forests of Glubina.

I had imagined a landscape covered in ice and snow, and I was more than right. To make matters worst, a snow storm had rolled into the area in few hours it took to reach the camp. And thus we were flying through great skies of grey. It was still clear enough to fly, just barely, with the daylight still shining, but every minute that went by reduced visibility and made crashing for us and rescue helicopters more likely. Just in case

"This is Archer, Captain can you see the POW camp?" I looked down; saw nothing but a rolling white landscape of ice, with trees like only black dots over the white. And visibility was only getting worse.

"Not yet," Blaze answered Archer.

"Well, we should be able to see it soon," Chopper commented.

Snow and cold…they kept reminding of the dream, of myself…Why was this happening to me? I had been in over a dozen major combat engagements in a period of only two months. I had seen so many things, so many tragedies and horrors that come with being a soldier in a time of war. I had seen so much, felt so much. I had kept my demeanor, my focus, my heart through it all. From the death of my friends to the slaughter of so many people, I had kept it together. I thought I was made of stern stuff, of an iron will, that I could handle it all, just like the Captain taught me, all the things he said to me. I had to focus. I was in a mission and my team was counting on me. Blaze was counting on me.

I thought helped me a bit. I had to keep focused, or everything would repeat itself. That's what I told myself anyway.

"Do you think the Captain…uh…I mean Captain Bartlett. Do you think he's in there?" Grimm asked.

"I bet he is. He's probably busy cussing out all the other POW's and taking charge right now. Right Nagase?" Chopper asked me, and I didn't respond.

Captain Bartlett, he had to be there. Where else could they have taken him?

"You're not still blaming yourself are you?" Chopper said to me.

The mornings encounter with the Chief Medical Officer came to mind, and I couldn't help but feel some resentment at what Chopper said to me.

"No..."

"Fighters I can hear the roar of your engines approaching. Ah, this is Sea Goblin," the voice was rather pleasant and relaxed a bit unlike most marines. "Man I thought if I joined the Marines I'd get to work on tropical beaches all the time. We've safely recovered the POW's. Guess our 'copters not here yet."

"You gonna have to babysit 'em a little longer. I'm picking up enemy planes on my radar," Chopper said.

The radar was full of interference from the storm, and the contacts were barely visible, but they were definitely fighters. "Tally ho, I see them too."

"Roger, you're that squadron from Sand Island right? Can't wait to see you do your stuff."

"Alright Wardog. We only have few minutes to sanitize the air space," Blaze said.

"I copy Captain. We have to take care of all them so the helicopter can get through," Grimm responded.

Four enemy planes visible. There were at least ten more in the area, spread out within a few miles of the POW camp. We had to shoot them all down. We had to rescue those men. I had to rescue Captain Bartlett

"Well, let's do it before we all freeze," Chopper commented breaking off with Grimm to engage the enemy planes. "Chopper engaging."

"Archer engaging," Grimm indicated.

The enemy planes detected us and began evasive maneuvers.

"You ready Nagase?" Blaze asked me.

"Yeah. Edge engaging."

The snow storm provided enough cover that the more distant formations couldn't detect us on radar. That and the Marines had control of the radio room on the POW camp, limiting the enemy plane's communications to short distance. All that gave a tactical advantage, but the poor visibility almost took that away. I knew it was going to be tough.

I engaged one of the planes, positioning my self behind him, at least that's what I though at first. Before I had missile lock he disappeared on my three–o'clock. "Dammit!" I pulled around, increasing the throttle till I could see the dark shape of his wings against the clouds. "Edge Fox 2." Missile hit. "Splash one."

"Nice shot. Grimm, Chopper how about you?"

"We got 'em kid, not to worry. Don't have any clue where the rest of them are though."

"We can't detect them on radar unless we get close. We'll just have to fly around till we find them," Blaze said. And so it went.

I didn't take long to shoot down all of the enemy planes, despite the fact we had to search near the entire airspace to locate them. None of the squadrons even seemed notice us until we were in firing range. I thought for the first in our experience the operation plan actually succeeded. Maybe we would have some luck for a change?

Blaze shot down the last enemy plane, and fell to Earth in flames. "Splash one. I think that's all of them."

"Yeah, unless there are more planes they didn't tell us about," Chopper replied. "I wish we could more missions like this, no giant submarines shooting burst missiles at us. I could almost fall asleep up here."

"Don't just yet. We still have to cover the helicopter," Grimm interjected.

"I know that. I just wish we could get a break some time soon."

The weather was getting worse. Ice was starting to form on the seals on the canopy, and the daylight was quickly fading. The helicopter still wasn't there.

The radio chatter from the ground suddenly increased, sounds of gunfire laced the static.

"What's going on down there?" Grimm asked.

"This is Sea Goblin, combat has broken out in the camp. You have control of the airspace now right?"

"This is Wardog," Blaze began, "Roger that Sea Goblin. Air superiority is ours. You can call in the taxi now."

"I knew we could count on you. Okay we're going to get everyone out of here," Sea Goblin responded

Everyone?

We changed flew over the camp, the black shapes of the structures were only barely contrasting with the snow, white snow. It looked a land abandoned by all hope, much like the seven cities on the border of North Osea and Belka. The people in there…

"I see the POW camp. The man I must…" I stopped myself before continuing. My heart started to skip. "The people we must help are in there."

"No one replied."

A radio transmission came in from Sea Goblin, the helicopter was finally there. The IFF confirmed three helicopters inbound, two CH-47 and one HH-9B gunship, saviors to the POW's.

"Whew! This is Sea Goblin our ride's here," the same voice that first greeted us said. "The ground is still crawling with weapons installations, though, so they can't land. Could you blow them out for us?"

"Roger that Sea Goblin." Blaze responded.

"Blow them out? I can barely see anything in this haze," Chopper said. As he spoke, we passed over the camp and the ground came alive with tracer fire. "Damn! Never mind. Let's do it before they shoot us down."

I pushed the throttle forward, not waiting for any orders form Blaze, flying towards the AA batteries at the eastern end of the camp as they fired into the sky. I found the nearest one, locked on and fired. "AA guns destroyed." Blaze did the same, rolling down from altitude, and then firing a missile onto a weapons installation. "SAM destroyed. Nice shot Blaze."

"Thanks. I think we've destroyed most of them."

"There's still some coming from the edge of the camp. I'll take care of them Kid," Chopper reported.

"Copy that Chopper," Blaze responded. "You alright Nagase?"

"I'm fine. I just want to get those people out of there."

"Yeah. You really think he's in there?" Blaze asked me. He seemed a bit concerned.

"Where else do think he'd be?" I asked harshly, feeling a need to justify my optimism. He had to be in there, that was only thought I had.

The Gunship from Sea Goblin had made it camp, and the win CH-47's were close behind him. We were almost there.

"This is the Gunship; I've got a special delivery of bullets here. Where do you want me to drop them off?"

The gunship went low and provided some needed fire power to the Marines, who were still engaging the Yukes in the camp. For a moment I felt useless, and a little helpless. We had destroyed all the major anti-air weapons. We had done job, and then it was up entirely to the Marines to get the POW's out safely. We had to wait, not something I wanted to do at that moment. Not at all.

"Looks like the POW's will be rescued in a few minutes," Grimm said.

"Yeah just wait till they're back in their old jobs, getting overworked like us. I bet they'll want to be back in that camp," Chopper commented.

"I wouldn't count on that," Blaze said. "This is place isn't exactly a vacation stop."

"Yeah, and the weather's just getting worse too," Chopper responded.

I didn't say anything. I was busy scanning the ground and the IFF, watching the helicopters land. Almost there…

"Ok, thanks for taking out the trash. We're taking the POW's outside now. Can you see their smiling faces?" The voice from before said over the radio.

The helicopters touched down on the landing pad, and a small light was visible from the open door on the side of the building they emerge from, walking a loose line toward the landing pad. I lowered altitude, flying at about five hundred feet; just high enough to avoid crashing into surrounding.

"Heh heh. Nagase's actually going down to look," Chopper said.

"Sea Goblin is Captain Bartlett there? Check for a Captain Bartlett." I asked, watching as all the POW's finished loading into the helicopter.

"No…no one named Bartlett here. Hey what about you?" The Marine said.

"Nope. Not here. None of the other POW's ever head of him either."

"But that can't…" I couldn't believe it. I saw the image of his plane going down in my mind, and the last words he said to me. "…Look just check for me one more time." I circled around to fly over the camp one more time at low altitude. I had convinced myself he was there, in the short course of the day.

All the things he had said to me…they rolled through my head, like snow in an avalanche.

"Second Lt. Kei Nagase huh. Look's like you're only the woman I have in the squad this time around," he had said when I first arrived.

"Nagase, you'll be flying number two on my wing. Gotta keep an eye on you or who knows what you'll get yourself into."

I owed so much to him. More than my life.

"Nagase! If you keep flying like that you'll die real soon!"

"I won't die sir."

I owed him so much, and I was the reason he was shot down. I was the reason he was captured. And I couldn't forgive myself. I had failed to protect my flight lead. I had failed to project my fellow trainees. I had failed to protect the nuggets under my command. The snow on the ground and the red blood that stained it…my blood… The image consumed my mind, till my eyes fell away into darkness.

Then the missile alarm went off.

"Aw dammit Nagase!"

I slammed the throttle down, feeling the jolt of the acceleration.

"You gotta relax Nagase or else you'll end up killing yourself," Bartlett had once said to me.

The SAM was only a few hundred away, gaining.

"You can't control everything that happens Kei. Eventually something will happen that you didn't want to," Blaze said to me.

I pulled the plane into a sharp climb, gaining as much altitude as I could, and the SAM followed.

"I could really use some help on this Nagase. He is going to be a brilliant fighter pilot. But all the stress will break him someday. I've seen it happen," Bartlett had said to me.

"Lt. Nagase are you alright?"

"You sure you don't want to tell me about Captain Bartlett?"

Hard left, but it was only getting closer.

"Blaze, do you believe in the Demon of Razgriz?" I had said.

"Watch out Nagase! They're down bellow us too!"

The missile exploded over his wing, and he was tailing smoke and losing altitude.

I found myself in the cockpit, the world around me a pale gray. "After all the Captain said to me…I…"

The explosion was deafening, and I always thought gunfire was loud when it hit the plane. My head was thrown forward as if, slamming against the consol, leaving me dazed a moment, and the alarm…Everything in the cockpit had red, and the HUD had vanished replaced by a flashing word, EJECT! Beyond the ground was racing up to me. Who was I to argue?

I pulled down the visor and pulled the lever. The canopy flew away and a cold rush of air hit me as the seat rocketed from the plane. I was falling, then the seat fell away and jerked upwards. I looked upward and saw the dark fabric of the parachute. I had made it. The wind was so loud but I heard the explosion of my plane slamming into the ground.

I had been shot down. The thought overwhelmed my mind. How could I have been so careless? I had let my emotions get the better of me again, and I almost died because of it.

For several minutes I was helpless in the air. The wind dragged the chute around as easily it might as well been leaf, and I had no choice but go along with it. I wonder if this is how a dandelion feels, when floats around in the air. When I finally was close I detached and fell to the ground, collapsing into a sheet of white powder. Cold. The snow seemed to get everywhere in and out of my flight suite, and I could feel it melt against my warm skin.

I had made it though. I rolled out of the powder, brushing all the loose snow of my person only to collapse back down, panting like a dog. My head was still spinning, and the echo of the alarms wouldn't silence in my ears. It almost felt like I was drunk, except not nearly as pleasant or fun.

I heard faraway thunder of a jet engine then the static of a radio, coming from the pack that laid on the ground beside me. I fumbled through and seized it taking the radio out and setting it to the proper channel.

"You alright? Lt. Nagase are you alright?" Grimm was hailing me.

I pressed talk and answered, "I'm fine. My plane's trashed but those are always replaceable." I stopped and fell back into the snow, waiting for them to say that they were coming to rescue me.

But only a garbles message came back.

I sat up, pressing talk again. "Grimm?" And only static came from the speaker. "Blaze!" And there was still only static.

A guest of wind came over me, sweeping fresh snow from the ground into the air. The storm was interfering too much, for the small radio. I had to get to higher ground.

I stumbled back to my feet, my legs aching in protest, freshly bruised from the landing. I was on a small hill, sparsely shrouded in trees, only about thirty meters from the top. I grabbed the pack and started to run, as much as I could run. With each step my feet sank an inch into the snow and more than once I tripped, ending up with ice in my face. But still I ran.

I reached the top, and found myself standing on the edge of a small cliff, about meters high from the snow bellow, overlooking the POW camp, which looked nothing more than black shapes in the distance. I cringed as another gust of wind came over me, stronger than the last. And I knew if the weather was only worsening.

Another gust came blowing with the ferocity of a hurricane, cutting into my skin like razor's edge. Cold. I covered my face with my hands, vainly trying to shield myself from the chill. There was no chance for me if I was caught out there. I pulled the radio out again. Might as well try one more time.

"Blaze!" Nothing. "Is anyone still out there?" Still nothing but the sound of the deadly wind.

I felt tightness in my throat. They wouldn't abandon me. No. Blaze, he would never abandon me.

I knelt down, diving into my pack and retrieve the small binoculars, looking to the skies toward the camp. There was nothing then I heard the faintest roar of jet pass. They hadn't left. I scanned looking for any sign of the CH-47's. And in a moment a pair of lights flew over the ridge, soon followed by the sounds of rotors slicing through air. It was the gunship. It was coming to rescue me. Its search light past over the side of the cliff, passing over me and then stopping. They found me. I waved both hands to them, it changed vector towards me.

I really thought that would have been it. There was a clearing in the trees only a hundred meters from the cliff. They land there and I would hitch a ride back to Osean held territory. Some colonel would issue me a new plane and I would be home, at Sand Island, early the next morning. I thought and believed it.

Then the wind picked up again.

I could hear the sound of rotors in the gunship jam, and then tearing of metal. It might have been small pieces getting into the path of the rear rotor, or maybe the high wind small caused the top rotors to stall. It any event, the gunship hovered for a moment in the air and then plummeted down to the Earth. It fell and my soul fell with it. The sound of the crash was muted in and the cushion of the snow. I saw the gear bend and break like twigs. The rotors continuing to spin, pushing the gunship till the ground eventually stopped them. And then it lay there, motionless on its side. It was only a quarter-mile from rescuing.

Partly from and exhaustion and partly from the shear hopelessness I felt, sank to my knees, throwing my face into my hands. My fault!

"Nagase! If you keep flying like that, you'll die real soon!" And I may yet die.

I was there again, alone in the forest. My feet and arms bare. And wind blew cold and relentless. And I looked upon myself, dead by my own hands. My hands, that ran myself through. The sword lodge in the tree, and my blood stained the ground.

"I can't do this."

I sank into myself, falling into a pit of despair and darkness came over the icy tundra I was stranded in. I didn't feel or think. I didn't want to move or sleep. I just wanted to end. Everything to stop. For time to reverse itself and take me home. To my home! To take me away from the cold of loneliness.

I stayed like that till I was roused by the sound of a fighter approaching, an Osean F-18. I the faint light lines of it pass against the clouds, small then distinct. It flew low, only a hundred feet above the ground. It circled the crashed gunship, coming close enough for me to see the numbers on the nose. 016.

"Blaze!" I said. The fighter circled again, then raised altitude and flew South-East.

They hadn't abandoned me.

I felt some courage seep back into my heart and I rose to my feet, gazing at the fallen gunship. They could still be alive, and they me need more help than I did. The Yukes would soon regain possession of the POW camp, and send reinforcements into the area. We didn't have a lot of time to gain some distance on them. The only good part I knew, was the whether would stall any search.

I gazed down at the wounded gunship, and then looked to the sky. To Captain Bartlett and to Blaze, with newfound strength.

"No one will die."

I picked up my pack, gazing at the cliff side to see to find a way down. I spied a slope some distance from my position that I could descend down without too much difficulty.

"There." I strapped the pack to my back, and started to run.

The snow was as unyielding as ever. Some I would step and sink an inch, while other times I would find myself up my knees in frost. It made running along the ledge a hazardous effort. I reached the slope looking down, suddenly wondering why I had thought it would be easy to climb down.

It was gradual, short of. Close up it was a semi-gradual slope mixed with rocks peeking up from under the white blanket. It was better than a cliff, but I began to consider looking for another way. No time though.

I took a deep staccato breath and stepped onto the first rock. It held my weight for a moment, and then gave out. It was too fast grab anything and my body began roll down the hillside. I could see the gray sky for a moment, right before the stark pain of my hitting a rock. I rolled again my face flying into a patch of ice, and then into the open air, over and over till I was in free fall, followed closely by the feeling of a knife going into my back when I hit ground.

"Ahhhhhhh!" But there wasn't anyone to hear it.

I laid there for a minute, one hand tucked into my chest and other cradling the pain on my back. I grimaced when I touched the massive bruise that was there. I had landed clear onto a rock from a five foot drop, and damn lucky my spine was still in one piece. I cursed my bad judgment for a moment before getting up. Anymore mess-ups like that I would die there in the heart of Glubina. The only good part was that I was much closer to the gunship. I pick up and started running again.

The damage that was severe at distance was devastating up close. The landing gear laid in a twisted mess beside the body. The top rotors had been completely destroyed and several pieces of them were strewn across several square feet. I looked on sight as if it were a person dead in the snow, if it was me.

The pilot and gunner were nowhere to be seen and the area around the craft was silent save for the ghostly howl of the wind. I thought the worst. I thought I would find them both dead, with their entrails falling all over the gunship. I shuddered as walked over, pushing the thought from mind. No matter what condition they were in I had to give assistance. They had tried to save me. So I would save them.

I reached the body of the fallen tiger, the glass of the canopy cracked so badly I almost couldn't see inside. They were both unconscious, slumped in their seats. I could blood over the face of the gunner, and it only made work faster to get the canopy open. I plied fingers into the crease, trying to open it with my hands, to no avail. I needed more leverage, more strength to open it. I spied around and picked up one of the rotor pieces, shoving one end into the crease beneath the canopy. The shard was just thin enough. I pushed down and the canopy opened.

I checked there pulses; both still alive. I did my best to gently carry the gunner out of the cockpit and onto the snow. It wasn't easy. The marine was easily twice my weight and size. He had a cut on forehead which also looked like it had been beaten with a lead pipe, but other than he was fine.

The pilot was another matter. When I tried lifting him out, he woke and started gasping in pain.

"Ah stop! Stop!"

"What? What's wrong?"

His face was contorted in the worst expression. "Hah! My leg's broken."

"Shit…" And wind seemed to get colder as I said it.

With his help, I was able to get the pilot out and onto the snow, by which time the gunner woke up, probably with a bad migraine. We put a splint on the pilot's leg, and gave him what little morpheme we had.

We rested for a moment when it was done, each of us beyond exhaustion.

"Thank you ma'am," the gunner said after awhile. "We were coming to save you and you saved us. You guys really are something special. I'm glad to be serving with you." He saluted me, and despite the cold a wide expression of pride.

"…thanks." I returned the salute.

"We'll need to get moving soon. The Yukes definitely know we're here."

"Yeah."

I looked to the sky, trying to imagine the sound of fighter jets coming closer with each passing minute. The sound of hope. The sound of fire. As the day began to dip bellow the horizon, behind the grey clouds, and a dark chapter for me began.

I was there in a prison…in an ice cage.


	21. White Noise

Fire

Snow.

I had grown up in an area void of it for the entire year. Winters would be cold, at least colder than the spring and summer, it would rain sometimes, but never snow. Such was the weather on the Osean West Coast. I had lived there my whole life, and one wish I always had at the end of fall was for it to snow. I had a romantic idea of it when I was a little girl. I thought snow was the tears of angels falling onto the world, making dreams come true. It's was a bit silly of me. I would be seventeen years old before I would actually experience snow for the first time. I would be twenty-one before the first time I would have to live in snow. And now I am twenty-three, and realize how cold and deadly snow truly is.

"God damn it Nagase!" The words echoed through my head, and I tried to keep myself from crying at the thought of them. I wiped my hands over my face and could feel the cold of my fingers even through the heavy fabric of the pilot's gloves I wore. I immediately put them back beneath my arms, and pulled my legs even closer to me chest as I laid there on my side. And the chill of the air still shot through my body, as the wind and snow beat against the side of the shelter.

"No one will die." I tried to think and internalize those words, pushing out any thought of the numbness in my limbs, and the aching of the enormous bruise on my back. It seemed each time I moved it resurrected itself, and I was there again on that hill, tumbling down, out of control to the ground, followed by the sharp sensation of a knife piercing my back. It wasn't the most pleasant of memories.

I tried to put it out of my mind, thinking of something else. Anything else…Sand Island, the war, Grimm, Chopper, Genett, Blaze…I tried to think of future, how we would be recued the very next morning, like nothing happened, like they had never had left Glubina at all. But each time the wind would hit against the shelter and some snow would fall onto my face, and would see myself against that tree, dying alone in the frozen wastelands of Yuktobania.

Of course I wasn't really alone. The crew of the HH-9B Gunship slept soundly behind me. They had tried to save me, only to have their Gunship stall and crash into the snow. And so I had to save them, pulling each of them out one by one from the debris. That wasn't easy. And to complicate things the pilot was severely wounded with a broken leg. And here we are stranded, sleeping in a makeshift shelter in the middle of the Vladimir Mountains., with enemy forces not far away. We had come to this place to liberate prisoners of war. Now we were in the same position as they were, except our cage is made of ice, not steel.

I checked my watch. It was near 0100 hours in Sand Island. If Blaze, and the squadron had flown back, they would just about be there by now. They would land, refuel and debrief within a half hour. I can imagine the expression on the Commander's face when he here's what happened to me. "The moment I let you all out of my sight, this happens to you." He would say something like that. He would only half care. He didn't like me or the rest of the squadron. I wonder, was it because of our records that he wants to get rid of us, or was it because of our records that he doesn't? No, the only reason why he disliked us so much was because of one man. And that one man was the reason I and two marines were in that mess: Captain Jack Bartlett.

"I am not blaming myself for Captain Bartlett." That's what I had said to the Chief Medical Officer.

But I had lied.

It was only our second deployment as a squadron, and I was careless. The enemy spy vessel fired on me, and the Captain swooped like a guardian angel to save me, taking the hit himself. And that same spy vessel would bear him away to Yuktobania. I never forgot about nor was I able to come to terms with it. I let the thought steep in the back of mind. Until I was too obsessed to see I made the same error again, the same mistake that resulted in Jack Bartlett's capture.

And there I was lying on my mind as a snowstorm roared overhead on the ice of Glubina.

I rolled over to check my two companion marines. It was near pitch black in the very cozy shelter, but I could see their black silhouettes in the darkness sleeping soundly. I suppose they're much more used to this sort of action than I am. During the whole night they hardly made a yelp, despite the frigidness of our situation that kept me awake. Maybe their injuries helped in that regard?

I settled for a moment listening the whooshing sounds of the air above, hoping it would help me drift of to sleep, even if only for few minutes. I gave up after only a moment. I couldn't help but fret over the situation, over the mistakes I had made, and what the next day would hold for us…for me…

When you sit alone for a long time in the dark your worst fears start to materialize, and my worst fears certainly seemed to become real then. What if we are captured? The more the word bounced through my thoughts, the more it seemed to be an inevitability. I had thought about it ever since I pulled the gunship crew out. We were stranded in the heart of Yuktobania. Recoiling from our recent liberation of their POW camp, then would send every unit available to capture us…and me. It would certainly be consolation considering the damaged we have caused them up that point. More frightening yet, what would my fate be after capture? The wind blew a strong gust, and the percussive noise of the tarp that covered us was enough to knock the thought away.

We were going to make it out, I resolved, alive. "No one is going to die." Except the words sounded so weak.

Any rescue I still was hours away. Maybe ten, or some number close to that once weather conditions improved. The Yukes would be on us far sooner than then. Somehow, our injured party would have to evade them.

Almost impulsively I began to grope around in the darkness in front of me, trying to grasp hold of my EmR Beacon. I found the radio, my emergency rations, canteen, and the radio again before I finally grasped the small device, it's blinking red indicating it was transmitting. Gründer's latest, and practically the only recent addition to a pilot's survival kit, when I discovered this thing in my pack I experienced the only moment of happiness I would have in Glubina. The EmR Beacon sent out constant pulses of scrambled radio waves, thus making much easier for any rescuer to find a rescuee. And much easier for Osean Forces find us in an ice covered tundra.

I sat it in down right in front, starring into the blinking red light, my only candle in the darkness. Suddenly of the worst fears that had been coming true dissipated, and in the cold I finally felt some warmth. I let myself imagine Blaze, Chopper and Grimm picking up the signal all the way at Sand Island. I could see Blaze, not resting, flying all the way on steel wings to rescue me from that ice cage. It would be just like a story book fairy tale. The wicked would be vanquished and the righteous would prevail. And that would be the end.

If only realty was that kind…

I saw myself there again, as I had the days leading up to that moment.

I stood alone in a coniferous forest in the dead of winter. The howled through the trees and sent an icy shiver up my spine. I looked down at myself and I was dressed in my flight suit, ready and waiting to fly. I looked up and the trees began to disappear behind a white haze of snow.

I was at loss for what to do when I heard a shot from behind me. My heart skipped as I turned quickly trying to see where it came from. A moment passed and nothing became visible through the haze.

Then there another shot. I staggered back. Bracing myself, doing my very best to try not to panic. I had to find out what I was up against. If I acted too quickly I would end up endangering myself. As I had before…

It was quiet for a moment then there was another shot, much closer the previous. I hit the deck immediately without thought, and I heard the faint whistle of the bullet pass over my head.

I was out of time.

I ran through the haze toward, sprinting wildly through the haze. There was no sound of pursuit but that didn't comfort me. I was in danger. I knew it in my heart that if I didn't run as fast as I could, I would be dead.

I don't how long it was. It seemed like an eternity but at the same time it seemed like an instant, such was the confusion I was feeling. There was nothing in front of me so it seemed, just the white haze that seemed to hide the entire world. Then I saw something, faint in the mist.

I stopped, sliding a few feet before I came to a halt, my eyes inexorably locked on the dark shape emerging from the haze. It was nothing but a blur at first but then as it came closer the features slowly solidified into the solid structure of a man. My heart leaped as it happened. He came closer and I could see the Osean Air Defense Force emblem on his uniform.

I was saved!

I began to slowly stumble toward him, suddenly gripped by an elation that overrode any reason I had. Till I saw who it was…

Jack Bartlett was walking before me dressed in his pilot suite, with a 9mm Beretta in hand.

I ran toward him suddenly without restraint. Everything seemed to be right. I was saved! He was saved! I ran on, till no white hazed blurred my vision, till I could see him as clear as water. And there I stopped. The elation was gone and replaced by a familiar horror.

The dream came suddenly back into memory. The dream I had before we launched to save to the POW's. The dream haunted that me still, and the primal, nameless fear that it brought.

I stood there. 9mm in hand dressed in the same flight suit. I looked down and saw that I no longer wore that flight, only that same undershirt and pants. I looked at myself and saw the cold hatred in those eyes, a malice the breathed suffering and left no doubts to its murderous intent.

"No." I said aware of were I was, aware that it wasn't real, wanting to wake up. But those eyes…They seemed to trap in, grip me in such terror that I was frozen in place.

I saw both hands grasp the pistol, and the weapon fired, the bullet driving into my skull, and white turned to red.

I felt moisture on my head and my eyes slowly opened to nothing by black. It was quiet I heard myself exhale, and suddenly became aware of how sore my legs were. Another drop landed on my forehead, and reached up to wipe it away as the beads rolled passed my right eye.

A faint red flashing caught my attention. It was right in front of me. I wondered what it was for a moment before everything returned.

I had been dreaming again, only that time it wasn't so bad. Maybe it was the fatigue? I wasn't in a panic. I was calm, maybe more calm than I had ever been. Not that it was a pleasant dream, but it did mean I had at least gotten some sleep.

Another water drop landed on my forehead. I moved my hand as to wipe it off, when I suddenly became aware of how much noise I was making. I remained still and heard nothing but silence in the darkness.

Silence…

The wind had ceased.

As quietly as I could I knocked off the layer of snow that covered the shelter, and carefully making an opening just large enough so I could slip through on my stomach. Standing up was painful. I knocked off the loose ice that was on my flight suite before scanning the area.

The weather had completely cleared. I don't think I have ever seen so many stars. Even with all the tree cover there was, all of them filled the night with such brilliance that for several moments I forgot the desperation I was in. The ache of my legs eventually drew me to my knees, but I still starred at them, as though I had never seen them before in my life.

I remember, I only ever took one astronomy class in my life, and that was only because a friend dragged me into so that she didn't have to be alone. I remember the instructor was a senile, rude, and unhappy retired Ph.D. who did it because it made his wife happy. I remember him throwing several students out the class for being late on the first day. And I remember it was one of the best classes I ended up ever taking. I tried to recall all the names of the stars he taught, but I could only remember the first.

"Actuaries." I skimmed the sky, trying to find. But I was in a different part of the World. Many of those stars were unfamiliar, and it was just too long ago.

That must have been maybe four years after the fall of the X1994-XF04 asteroids. Around the same when Eurusia constructed Stonehenge.

It's incredible to think of how much affect those meteors have had on our society, on our World. They've stopped wars and started them. The damage they did to world economic output pushed Belka into a fiscal crisis, prompting the war that would come a little over year later. I suppose I have them to blame for all this, or at least some of it. Osea herself was lucky. Most of the impacts were concentrated on the Usean Continent, which prompted the construction of the super weapon, Stonehenge. Of those meteors that did hit the Osean Continent, Osea herself was hit by relatively few. But I did see one strike, exploding over the ground in such fantastic light; the night became brighter than the day. It was like a sign from God. I don't know.

When the memories faded I noticed faint light on the eastern horizon, and all the awareness of where I was came back to me. I checked my watch. It was passed seven in the morning in Sand Island, and it was just before dawn here in Glubina.

Now we were nearly out of time.

I rushed back to the shelter pulling the pack and rummaged around till I found the portable binoculars, then rushed to the nearest vantage point of the POW Camp. It was still nearly completely dark over the landscape. The only visible parts of the camp were the lights over guard towers and on the landing pads.

So I waited. And it wasn't too long before helicopters arrived at the camp, two Mi-38 medium transports, accompanied by three gunships of what looked like a modified AH-64 type. A lot of firepower to look for just the three of us. I knew it wouldn't be long before fighters and other aircraft would arrive in the airspace to give support to their search parties. They could have complete air superiority in a matter of hours. And I dearly hopped they were not able to track the EmR Beacon.

I didn't stay too long. The longer I observed the more I risked their aircraft somehow spotting me. It was still too dark for them to set out, unless they were very determined. That would give us some time. But not a lot.

But what the hell was I going to do?

I looked back to where the shelter was and the barely visible tracks I had left in the snow. We couldn't stay there. The Yukes didn't know where we were and given all the tree cover and snow fall that occurred during the night, it would be incredibly difficult for them to find us…if they couldn't track the beacon. But even if we could stay, their forces would over run the area. Then there would be no chance of rescue. We had to move, I knew. The only question was how was I going to get the wounded marines out safely.

I scurried back to the shelter, tripping once as my foot sank into a foot of powdered snow, to one of the marine had already roused, or maybe he had been awake all that time?

"Ma'am," he acknowledged when he saw that it was me.

I nodded back, swiveling my head around just to make sure the Yukes weren't already on top of us. The top of the shelter suddenly rose up to reveal the wounded the marine, sitting comfortably on the bed of ice. "We need to get moving," I said softly, and began to gather the contents of the pack that had gotten scattered during the night.

The marines didn't need any explanation. They knew full well why had to get moving. "Understood," the first said and then began to help the wounded marine to his feet.

I had everything ready in few moments. The shelter had been neatly packed and stored. The EmR beacon, radio, the emergency space blankets, the first aid kit, flares, rations, knife, and my side arm. The vague memoires of my survival training flashed through my mind as thought of how they might be used to get us out of there. I was ready and so were they, just as the sun began to break over the Eastern Peaks of the Vladimir Mountains. I looked the bank of the hill before me. It seemed fairly gradual, definitely scalable, even with a crippled hiker. It was almost overrun by trees, and almost too thick to see the snow underneath. I had faint idea of laid beyond it from the day before, when I was flying in an Osean F-18 over these mountains, instead of running between them. It was only few hours ago but at the same time I knew it might as well had been a lifetime that passed, and I knew it would be another lifetime till I was flying again over these mountains, in an Osean helicopter. I felt the tingle of sunlight on the back of my neck. The dawn had come and I could feel the race begin, the timer set and counting. All the time of the rest of my life seemed gone, the past and the future, with the present time the only remaining. And my heart beat with the fear and the excitement of what I knew was going to happen. It was time.

Time to move.

I took lead, starting up the bank of the hill where we had set up shelter. It didn't take long before I realized just how much snow had fallen that night. The trees were nearly immaculate, every inch of the branches covered by snow and ice. And so was the ground. I had hoped that maybe, somehow, the snow would have packed down tighter, making it much easier to walk. But the first step I took my left foot dropped several inches, and I fell forward.

"You alright ma'am?"

I wanted to say no. The bruise on my back seemed as fresh as the previous night, everything seemed sore and all the pride I had in myself was about to snap in half.

"I'm fine." I pulled my leg out and stood on what felt to be a tree root and looked ahead. Trees covered that entire side we were on, and I guessed that they extended well beyond the other as well. Maybe it will help give us air cover?

The pilot must have felt a lot worse than he did the night before, maybe even worse than he had felt when the gunner and I first pulled him out of his crashed gunship. We didn't even make it a quarter mile before he wasn't able to hop along with only the gunner supporting him. So I had no choice but to help carry him, slowing us down even more as we moved across the snow. His right arm wrapped tightly around my neck, and I felt the nails through his glove dig into my left shoulder. He was in pain. Within a few more steps of our walking up the hill I felt as if he might just tear the flesh right off my bone. My only comfort was that the gunner was just as uncomfortable as I was.

Every few moments I found myself looking to the top of the hill with the pale blue morning sky beyond as salvation. The ache in my legs seemed to be amplified tenfold with the added weight, making my muscle feel as though they would tare straight off the bone. The slope had seemed mostly gradual, but walking it was an entirely different matter. One stumbled step, then another, then the groan of the pilot as he reeled from his splinted leg momentarily touching the ground, and the feeling that I would very soon collapse. Why do marines have to be so heavy?

"Hang in there!" I found my self saying between my heavy breaths, trying to encourage him as much as I could. The funny thing was, I felt as though I was about to die.

When we finally reached the top all three of us stopped, each of us conscious of just how hard that little hike had been. I turned my head and looked back down where we came and was surprised how far it actually was from where the shelter was. At least we had covered some distance. The POW Camp was nothing but a loose assortment of gray buildings in the distance. It seemed so peaceful in the morning light, I thought. Though so was I, not too long ago.

We only rested long enough to catch our breath. It must have been only minute, maybe less. I would've never thought that short amount of time would make any difference.

We heard the rotors of the approaching chopper only a moment before it was visible to us, the black shape about two hundred feet above our elevation, bearing right down on us from several miles away. Coming right for us…

"Dammit," I cursed still out of breath. I looked down the slope of the hill. It was much steeper than we had just climbed, but even denser with trees, leading to wide valley. It wasn't going to be fun, and I knew it was even going to be a little dangerous. More than a little, and I briefly thought about my own tumble the other night. But we didn't have the time to find any safer way down.

"C'mon," I said to the marines, cursing to myself while I did. As soon as we stepped off the relatively flat top onto the downward slope we began to slide, and I mean slide. I reached out my arm and grabbed the slim trunk of a snow covered tree to stop us from tumbling down. The gunner did the same to another tree adjacent, and I heard the pilot groan as he pushed up with his splinted leg.

"You alright?" I turned my head to ask.

He didn't say anything, just nodded up and down as the gunner got a better hold of him.

The chopper's rotors seemed much louder then, and we were still too exposed. Instead of trying to walk down the grade, this time we basically sat down and let gravity do the work. So like a three person sled we slid down the bank, the gunner and I using our feet to stabilize us. With the sound of the enemy to motivate us, we kept going like that for several minutes, until the slope finally started to ease enough to where we were walking again.

I'm not sure how lone it was, but at some point the sounds of helicopter blades slicing into the air became fainter, shifting north of our position and moving till it was all but inaudible. The panic alarm in my mind seemed to wane then. He hadn't seen us. It must have been by shear luck that his vector was right toward, I told myself. We were safe. We kept going, fore a minute or two despite that. I guess I was trying to get some advantage over our pursuers, but the strain of carrying the pilot soon became more than I could bear. Not to mention, the pilot himself wasn't in the best of shape from the getaway either. Somewhere in the woods we slowed to a stop setting him as gently as we could against a tree.

I suddenly knew why coal miners had such health problems after years of working. My back felt more twisted and bowed than wreckage of the destroyed gunship. Everything hurt. I would have to do would be to crouch to take something out of my pocket and I would be confronted with needles in multiple places. Almost unconsciously I found myself on my knees, leaning forward as some of my sweat fell onto the snow.

"Damn." I remarked to myself realizing how worn my body already was. I was supposed an Osean Air Defense Force pilot. I was supposed to be in the top one percent of the Osean Armed Forces fitness index. I was supposed to be able to kept concentration when flying a fighter aircraft and experiencing ten plus gs. I was supposed to be tough, but at that moment I felt anything but. I was glad Captain Bartlett wasn't there. I was glad Blaze wasn't there to see how exhausted I was.

It was silent for a little bit. I guess the three of us were too tired to talk, not that there was much to talk about. Even the breeze seemed to quiet down as we sat there. We rested for maybe ten minutes. That was the most I would risk. We were deep in the forest and the enemy didn't know our position, but I couldn't help but obsess over the possibility that they might again find us by chance.

And I was right to…

As soon as we started walking, another helicopter could be heard approaching west of us.

Again.

I did my best to swallow my frustration. Again. How could they keep just stumbling on us?

We didn't have too much choice of where to go. We were walking along the edge of the valley, which went east-to-west before curving south. If we moved any more North to try to evade, it would take us out of the tree line into more open area, and we would be easy targets in the white snow. Only one option then. We would just have to hope the chopper wouldn't spot us.

We picked up the pace as much as we would, but the five-legged creature that we were could only run so fast, even as each second passed the sound of the chopper became much louder. We took cover when it came over our position. It didn't pass directly overhead but it was close enough to where I could follow it through the dense canopy of branches. I became aware of my grip tightening on my side arm as I watched it, waiting for it to turn toward us, weapons blazing. If it did, I imagined myself vainly shooting at the AH-64 with a 9mm pistol, almost the same as trying to slay a dragon with a butter knife. It would be a sure way to commit suicide. Somehow, right then and there, the thought didn't seem that bad. But gunship didn't turn toward us. It kept on its original vector and flew east toward the POW Camp.

It didn't know we were there…

I stood up watching it fly away till it was out my line sight, partly to make sure it didn't suddenly turn back and partly in wonder. It was the same gunship as the one that passed us before, I realized. It had to be. Why then did it fly North circle around and come back heading east? The answer to that was easy. It was surveying the area trying to sight us. Then, how did it each time almost come upon our position?

I knew the answer long before the question had arisen though. In fact, I knew it long before I was ever shot down, on the first of our survival training for OADF.

I reach around into my pack and pulled out the EmR Beacon, the brand new piece of technology to help stranded Osean pilots. And there was no doubt about it anymore. The Yuktobanians were tracking its signal.

"Dammit!" I felt the urge to throw it to the ground, to rip off the battery pack, to destroy it, to any number of things to it, but all I did was stare into the incessant blinking red light on its side.

What could I do? I asked the question over again in my head, but that only made me more frustrated. If I deactivated it, the Yukes wouldn't be able to follow its signal. They'd be left to rely on traditional methods. We could lose them then, if we kept up a lively pace…maybe…

But how were we going to be rescued? Blaze would also to be just as blind as the Yukes. He would return to the crash site to find us long gone and a massive Yuke force in the air and on the ground. They would be forced to give up on us. We would be on our own. Could we make it, I thought. We would have to evade Yukes for more than just a day. We would have to zig-zag back to allied territory, more than a hundred miles away… all the while evading capture…with an injured marine. That thought did not give me hope.

I looked at the pilot, seeing how much pain he was in from just under two hours of walking. Walking not even five miles. I would be forcing him to trek a hundred back to friendly territory. I couldn't do that. We had to get out of there, soon.

The beacon was still blinking in my hands, and I saw them in my mind, the Yuktobanians, racing toward with determination and hatred, following its signal to our exact position. Troopers, dogs, choppers, fighter jets, maybe even snowmobiles. They would send everything they had in the region to come for us. But we wouldn't be alone. I wouldn't be alone. Blaze was coming for me. Every crack of bones, every ached of my muscle, every fiber of my being told me that. And no matter what force they sent up to stop him, none would succeed.

I took the EmR beacon and placed it back into my pack and closed it. It would stay on no matter what. I, we were getting out of there. And I had a sudden inspiration for how I was going to do it.

I helped the pilot to his feet, and began to walk. The resting gunner saw we were leaving and scrambled to catch up, draping the other arm of the pilot over his shoulder to help carry.

"Ma'am, what's going on?" he asked.

There was no reason not to tell him. "The Yukes are tracking the Emergency Beacon. They'll be able to follow us no matter where we go. But we have to keep it on or else the rescue party will be blind. You two are going to hide somewhere and I'm going to take the beacon and lead the Yukes out the area for now. I'll circle back and rendezvous once friendly forces arrive."

"Uh..." He stuttered. This wasn't the usual protocol he was used to obviously. "Ma'am if I may. I'd rather it'd be me." I couldn't help but chuckle at it. There was some absurdity about his comment considering how desperate our situation was. He continued, "Ma'am you're too valuable. If you captured…"

"I won't. Plus you're more able to take care of our pilot here than I am." I responded.

He seemed like he wanted to say something, perhaps to come up with some subtle logic to convince me, but he didn't. I felt him take a little more of the pilots wake. He didn't like did. I could tell that much. But then again, neither did I really.

"Where are we going?" he asked after few moments.

"To a good hiding place," I responded. I had seen from the peak of the hill almost the moment before our scramble down it. I didn't think anything about it then, but it was the best place I had in mind, and was also fairly close to us. It was fairly near the tree line of the valley, but it was still covered enough to mostly invisible from the ground. It was a large boulder formation that had almost destroyed from weathering. Many of the boulders were in pieces, with only one or two protruding above the trees. All that debris should confuse aircraft trying to spot a person on the ground. And if they were found the rocks would give them some cover from enemy fire. At least so I thought at the time. In retrospect it certainly was not a flawless strategy, but there wasn't much else to choose from.

We arrived soon after that, much sooner than I had thought. There were many more boulders than I had thought, large and small ones extending like black behemoths out of the white snow. I briefly thought of how they must have survived for millennia in mostly forested area of Glubina.

We laid the pilot down next to one of the larger ones. He didn't seem to like the idea either but I guess the pain of his broken leg forced his hand. I gave them all the medical supplies we had, water, most of the rations and enough ammunition to put up a good defense if they were discovered. Though I honestly wasn't that concerned about them at that time.

"There," I said handing the last of the clips. He took it and gave me a look of pride mixed with shades of regret.

He nodded gravely, as he was saying goodbye to his best friend, or his sweetheart back in Osea. "Thank you Ma'am." He slipped the clip into one of his pockets, taking a deep breath as he did so. "Good luck."

I felt some regret as he said that. I felt like a school girl asking to be excused from a class, or as I felt when I told my mother I was joining the military. I took a deep breath summoning all the courage I could gather, hoping it would be enough.

"Thank you."

It felt like awhile since I had felt that much fear and trepidation setting out. The first time I piloted a fighter jet I felt it. Taking off from Sand Island to flew to St. Hewlett when the War began I felt it. And taking off to destroy the Hrimfaxi I had felt it. It was like standing on some strange precipice between terror and excitement, and odd sensation that continued to morph inside causing the blood to rush to my head and hands. It was sort lived though. Within a few minutes of running my head started to clear, but it didn't go away. I was being hunted for real this time. All the times in my child hood where I felt something was watching me, all the nameless monsters that haunt the outer reaches of our imagination seemed real. The old fairy tale wasn't just a story anymore. It wasn't just childhood fantasy to imagine myself the princess. The Demon of the Northern Sea was still alive, and it was coming for me.

The thought seemed fantastic but I had to push it aside. There was no time to indulge my oldest fears and dreams. I had to be alert.

It was quiet for awhile. I felt like I was on a lone trek through the woods, on some fantastic adventure. Which was true from a certain point of view. I was still in the thick of the trees moving south-west along the small valley. I thought I moved there long enough I might convince the Yukes to send their search party there to head me off. Then I could cut back somehow to the marines, once help arrived. At least it sounded good in my head.

I was running for some time. I eased up the pace little when I started to get out of breath. The sun had fully risen for a while by then, and for the first time noticed the beauty of Glubina, the evergreen coniferous forests, and the crystal white snow that blanketed the landscape in winter. What had seemed such a cruel place during the night seemed nearly holy in the day. I made a note in my mind that someday I would have to return, when I wasn't running for my life.

The thought was half out of my mind when I heard the distant thunder of a jet aircraft.

I was down in a second leaning against; crouching for as much cover as I could while I furiously scanned the space around me. It was high, a few thousand feet above me and it was definitely a fighter. The Yukes really were serious about capturing me. They did think one Osean pilot was that dangerous? I looked up through the branches trying to get glimpse of a contrail, but nothing was visible. I was probably safe, but I waited till the jet sound was gone before starting to move.

Could their fighter aircraft also track the beacon? I dropped the thought. It wasn't going to be of any help to think about that.

I was about to move. I tightened the straps top my pack and began to push with my legs. I stopped myself then, quickly ripping out the binoculars for a look around. I was near the tree line, I could the see the white surface of the valley floor only a few hundred feet away. I looked and there wasn't anyone around. I breathed a sight of relief then looked toward where I was headed. I almost didn't notice the movement, they were pretty far away, keeping cover like I was. The movement of the white camouflage was hard to pick out even in the brush, but I saw him, a Yuke Army Soldier move between the tress.

"Damn." I was right they did move tot the South-East to head me off. But I didn't think they would move that quickly. It was too soon to double back. They would find us well before help arrived. But I couldn't keep going that way.

I resisted the urge to throw the binoculars into the ground and took another look. I could get glances at few of them, but from their position it was clear there must have been at least a dozen. And if the aircraft were tracking the EmR beacon, there were getting real time onto on my position. Not good…

"What am I going to do?"

I took out my side arm, tacking the clip out and checked it. Fully loaded. I had two more stashed away somewhere on me. That meant almost fifty shots. The Yukes would have a lot more than that. If I didn't have the beacon might have been able to slip past them. And deactivating it was out the question.

I turned back, running nearly as fast I could without tripping in the snow or over tree roots. I had to stay well ahead of them. If I could cover enough ground I might be able to turn North and lead the Yukes that way. That would steer them clear away from the chopper crew at least. So I thought at least. I couldn't think of anything else to do.

I ran on, keeping my head as low as I could. I trying to keep a mental note of where I was, but with every tree I ran around the more things started to look the same. My thoughts started to wander after awhile.

Where was Blaze?

It was an eternity since I was shot down. What was delaying him? I bet the base commander took hours to brief him. He always had to pour in extra details for simple operations. Yet when we had some thing that was very dangerous he was practically a monk. And he was in that air conditioned office, kept just bellow 78 degrees, while I was in a cozy twelve.

Where was Blaze?

My ankle twisted suddenly. Nothing seemed hurt though.

Things were becoming monotonous. I knew I was still in the southern part of the valley we had stumbled into. Why was everything so unfamiliar? I had just run past most of these trees. I doesn't matter I told myself. I had just had to stay ahead of the Yukes.

I spied a raven resting on a tree ahead of me. It watched me for a moment while I ran past, then fluttered away. What was it doing there?

I turned my head up to watched, but lost it almost immediately. It seemed a strange place for it to be.

I looked ahead and stopped when I saw where I was running. The trees suddenly disappeared, giving way to the white expanses of freshly fallen snow.

"What?"

I had thought I was running parallel to the tree line, or at least deeper into the woods.

I dropped low, getting cover behind a dead stump and checked my surroundings. I was still safe. I must have just lost track of what direction I was running for a moment.

I saw a black object in the air out of the corner of my eye. My heart skipped before I realized it was just the raven I had seen earlier, flying North over the snow. I laughed a bit at myself. I was jumping at shadows.

I was wasting time. There was a Yuke patrol on my tail and I was sitting laughing at myself. I needed to keep moving west to find better cover before swinging north. There wasn't a lot of time.

Another jet noise punctuated the silence then. It was pretty far away though. No threat.

I scanned the area ahead of me again, and there was nothing insight but ice covered vegetation. I was about to move, just about to step out of cover, when I hesitated. I scanned the area, looking as far as I could between the trees and over foliage. I had lingering fear in the back of my mind. I knew the Yukes were behind me but there were definitely more of them. Maybe I shouldn't go that way?

I could still hear jets overhead, and somewhere there were two AH-64's waiting to sight me running through the open. I gazed north again, along the path the raven had flown, contemplating the mad dash it was going to be. I could wait till the relative airspace wait clear, but that would give them more time to pinpoint the beacon. What then?

I could feel my blood pressure and heart rate rise as my mind raced with all the uncertainty. And all the while the EmR Beacon was leading them right to me.

My heart seemed to stop though when I heard a branch crack.

When flying in a fighter jet things seem to just spiral out of control. An enemy is insight, then he passes above and he's gone. A pilot becomes myopic chasing a bandit down he does not notice the other creep onto his tail. Everything seems clear when missile warning alarms suddenly come on, giving only few seconds warning before it hits. In only a short space of time, worlds are created and destroyed, often before anyone realizes.

Then, though, everything seemed to move too slowly. I clenched my side arm, ready to fire, to give myself cover while I ran for my life. My head was on a swivel, scanning every direction, waiting for the enemy to appear. Moments went by, and nothing, and nothing after that. No sounds or sights, except the soft breeze that had started to blow. With each passing second, I considered moving again, getting out of there before anyone appeared. But then I thought better of it, while tightening my grip on my side arm. I had to holdout.

There was another crack some moments later followed by thud of something hitting the snow. They were coming.

I kept my back against the trunk, and tilted my head right peering through the corner of my. I saw it then, the nearly invisible white camouflage of a Yuke army trooper with a stark black assault rifle in his hands.

"Dammit," I said barely under my breath. So there were more of them, and they had come at me from both sides of the valley, trying to trap me between them. And they had; only they didn't know it yet.

Dozens of scenarios flashed through my mind all at once. I could try to wait them out, till they leave the area. I could try to get around them unseen. Nothing seemed to work out though. I was frozen there, trying to keep myself from panicking.

They came closer with each step, slowly inching upon my position. Had they seen me? Could they track the beacon that accurately? It didn't seem to matter. In a moment I was going to have to take action.

Luckily they stopped before that happened. And the tension in my head was eased a bit. I could hear the foot steps of one of them behind me. They were sitting on top of me.

"Anything?" one of them asked.

"Nah, nothing. The tracks are there then they're they're there again and…I don't know where this guy's going."

"Okay. He's probably already left this area. Let's check with air support." I could the hear him fumbling with the radio. "Q1, Big Eye. You read?"

It was a short moment before the response came. "Big Eye copy."

"What's the status of that signal?"

"Signal source spread out from Area A1 to A9. Hasn't changed much."

"Roger Big Eye. Q1 out. Well he's somewhere around here."

"I don't know about this sarge," the speaker was farther off away from the tree line.

"What?"

"I just…this guy…I think it's a waste of time. I don't think we're going get him," the skeptical soldier said.

Someone else spoke up. "He can't evade our entire armed forces. We'll get him eventually."

"Yeah but…never mind" he broke off.

"But what?"

"What if he does?"

"C'mon."

"No, we've been looking for hours and we haven't seen a spec of this guy."

"He was also able to stay alive last night. In just a flight suite. He knows what he's doing," someone else said.

"We'll you know the Razgriz right? Negative forty from them is like being at the beaches at Murska," some smart-alic said.

"Yeah and sex for them is about just as hot," some smarter-alic said.

"Hey, hey." The sergeant said over the muffled laughter from the patrol. "We're supposed to be quiet remember. And I don't wanna hear anymore about any 'Demons of Razgriz.' Alright?"

"Well he is, right?" the skeptical soldier began again. "This guy's one them right?"

"Yeah," the smart-alic said. "That's what I heard. Those fighters last night were the guys. They took down the Hrimfaxi."

"The Hrimfaxi was just a big-ass sub. It doesn't make this guy a demon." The tracker said.

"I don't know," the smart-alic continued. "I've heard some scary stories about these guys. Some of the pilots have said these guys are unstoppable."

"The fact that we are chasing one of them right now proves they're not. He's running from us because he was shot down. How's that for impossible? Enough wasting time."

"Hey sarge," someone who hadn't spoken till then said. "I got some tracks going this way. Look's like he was running."

"Perfect. Let's go."

The voices ceased and were replaced by the sound of maybe a dozen footsteps and branches being broken and knocked out of the way. I stayed as still as possible hoping desperately that none of them would look back. The sounds of their passing gradually went quiet, and I slowly moved out of cover.

"And I don't wanna hear anymore about any 'Demons of Razgriz.' Alright?"

Demons of Razgriz…

The thought of it stunned me. The Razgriz, we were the Razgriz. That's what he called he called us. I saw the image, that black shape I had dreamed about flying over the icy water of the Northern Sea. I saw the raven flying over the white snow. I saw that great leviathan, lurking under the water. I saw Blaze, striking the death blow on the Hrimfaxi. Us, the Razgriz, the Four Wings of Sand Island. Us, the only reaming member of the Wardog squadron. How could we be them?

Out of the abyss peer the eyes of a demon.  
Behold the Razgriz, its wings of black sheath.

That old famous poem, the author that has long been forgotten by history, I had a

always read it as an ancient legend of a lost power. I couldn't believe that it was then about the four of us.

"What now?"

I could keep moving, as I had planned, hugging the forest while I moved west before cutting north. But the longer I stayed in the area the more Yuke forces I was going to have to deal with. And the whole point of this was to buy time for rescue. I thought of the raven again, flying over the snow toward the opposing tree line on the other side of the valley. It was that far. The Yuktobanians were heading the other way. If I could do it quickly enough the enemy aircraft might miss me. Maybe…

There was some good news at least. "This guy" they had said. They didn't know about the gunship's crew. They though I was alone. Though the more time and the men they had the sooner that small advantage would dissipate.

I scanned the skies quickly. There was nothing in sight, and I couldn't hear anything. It seemed strange. If they could track the signal why were they not flooding the air space to find me? Though I knew better. The "Big Eye" that Yuke Sergeant had talked to was probably an AWACS. They were serious about the airspace then. It meant a lot more trouble for Blaze.

"Where are you Blaze?" I said softly. Maybe they were held up with enemy forces? Maybe the enemy was pulling forces to engage them, and that was why the air space was clear?

It was possible at least. Though, it didn't matter much to me then. I had to lead them away. I had to keep the ground forces until the rescue forces came. And then there was no point in playing it safe anymore.

I looked over the white expanse again. I had run much farther before, but it still looked deadly. I breathed in, bracing myself for the sprint. Taking one final glance around to make sure I was alone, I ran.

The snow was a lot more compact than it was in the trees, and it felt strange for the first few steps. Maybe it was because the area was mostly flat, which kept down build up. Or maybe it was the Sun? It was still much easier than moving through the trees and that was a good thing.

I glanced back every few strides, trying to see if anyone was following. I couldn't see anyone in the trees.

I was clear, at least for those few moments.

The gunfire seemed so far away, I first thought they had found the marines, until the bullet crashed into the snow several yards ahead of me.

"Shit!"

I was still very far from the opposing tree line, so there was no place to dive for cover. I looked franticly among the trees, looking for the shooter when I saw the gray-white shapes of the Yukes running after me. A few them bring up there rifles to fire. I didn't need to see anymore.

I don't think I had ever run so hard, considering how hard it was even to run when the snow suddenly became uneven. They kept firing at me and turned sending three 9mm rounds there way. Whatever the shots hit, they didn't seem to slow the Yukes down.

I reached the tree line just as some bullets were fired into the trees. It was much more dense that the woods on the other side of the valley. I could only go a few steps before there was another tree in my way. The ground was hardly level. Every few feet there sudden dips and holes, making sprinting anything but easy. At least it was it was harder for the Yukes to get a clean shot.

The Yukes weren't deterred, and I could hear them follow me in.

I am not sure how long it was, at some point they ceased firing.

I kept running, almost getting myself lost. The terrain started to get steeper after awhile. I must have reached the Northern side of the valley. How long have I been running? How far?

Running up the hill I suddenly noticed the burning in my legs, and how heavy my breathing had gotten. I couldn't stop though I had to get some more distance on them. So I ran on till I reached the top of the hill and my legs were about to fall off.

"Damn."

I took cover behind another tree, and placed both hands on my sidearm. They couldn't be that far behind me. I was only going a few moments to catch my breath, and figure out what the hell I was going to do.

I more jet engine noise overhead. Two Yuke fighters were flying south-east pretty fast. They were intercepting! I turned around following there vector. There were several aircraft flying at low altitude several miles off. I groped into my pack for the binoculars and found the radio. I couldn't use it yet. If it was them I had to wait till they were closer or I'd be inviting the Yukes to were I was.

But I allowed some hope to wash over me. They were close.

I had caught my breath, and decided to move down the other side before going back to fetch the marines. That would confuse the Yuke patrols at least, buying some time.

It was about there, when I started to move that I finally heard. The jet noises must have masked it enough not to notice, not until it was too late.

I had made only few steps when the heavy rotors of the AH-64 helicopter rose up before me.

My eyes went wide in disbelief, and my feet froze into place. There it was, an angel of death, vectoring in right on me. And I had nowhere to run.

I didn't hear the missile approaching. I was too transfixed on the chopper when the missile crashed straight into the cockpit and detonated in a fiery ball of flame. For a moment I was dumfounded, not registering what had just happened. I turned around and saw the approaching aircraft, much closer than they were only moments before.

They were here.

The shadow that had been over suddenly was gone. I wasn't alone running to my death in the tundras of Glubina. I wasn't alone evading enemy forces. The bullet had left my head and was back into the gun. The sword was pulled out of my belly, and placed back into its sheath. My blood rolled back over the snow and back into my heart.

The air craft circled over my position confirming the kill on the chopper, an Osean F-18. I didn't need to seen the number on the nose to know who it was. I took out the radio.

"Blaze!"

It buzzed with a wonderful sound of static and interference.

"Nagase?"

I raised my hand, as though he would just reach down and take it.

"Nagase, Sea Goblin is inbound. Vector 102. Just stay there. They'll pick you up."

"Negative, the area's too hot. Moving vector…099 for pick up. I have some friends I have to meet," I said thinking of the marines.

"Copy. We'll take this airspace. You just stay alive."

"Yeah."

I screwed any sense I had of caution or stealth, and sprinted down the hill back into the valley. I don't think I even gave a thought to the Yuke patrols. I bet all or nothing on that hand and ran, what was left of, my ass off. Tripping and almost falling the entire way I made it through most the forest without incident. I thought maybe our fighters in the air persuaded the Yukes to pull back to base.

I thought…

I could see the white expanse of ahead of me as I dodged the tree and ran into a Yuke soldier. I am not sure who was more surprised, but before he could he bring up his M-4, I slammed my sidearm into the top of his head. I had come too far and I wasn't going to be stopped. I could hear the others react but I didn't stick around for them to shoot. I burst through the line and ran again, this time in the other direction.

I could almost see the rock formation from where I was. I just had to get there. There was clearing nearby in the trees for a chopper to land. I just had to make it.

A heard the wisp a bullet passing near, and out of a corner I could see the Yukes hot on my tail. I was in trouble if there were any sharpshooters among them. Not that I had many options.

I turned around, firing two shots while I was, vaguely hoping of them hit a Yuke soldier in the knee. They shot back. The tree line bobbled up and down before me. I was almost there. And so were the Yukes.

"Dammit! Get down!" I heard someone yell behind me.

Turning my head I saw the F-18 bearing down on us, causing all the Yuke soldiers to hit the deck. The cannon almost wasn't audible over the engine. It fired, causing geysers of snow to eruption right behind the Yuke soldiers. I made it to the trees and thanked Chopper under my breath, even though he could have killed me by accident right there.

I made it to the clearing by the rock formation only few minutes later. Sea Goblin was still few miles off and I knew it would difficult to spot us even in the clearing. I took off the pack and began to rummage through it for the flares.

And I had an idea.

I had seen it in plenty of movies. It wasn't at all that clever. But I was still pretty sure it would work.

I emptied the bag, taking the contents and burying them under some snow to the side of the clearing. I took flare and lit it, setting it down on the ground in the center of the clearing, while it sent white smoke into the air. I took cover, lying myself behind a frozen log. And I waited.

The Yukes approached carefully, I guess they were sensing something was up. There were only four of them. They slowly entered the clearing, spreading out, scanning the perimeter of trees. The soldier in the center stepped up to the flare and stomped it out in the snow, and then he noticed the empty bag lying against a tree up ahead of them. He signaled to the others and they took flanking positions slowly approaching it. And I had them.

"Stop," I said almost softly as I walked in behind them.

They exchanged glances, I'm guessing in disbelief of their ambush and reluctantly threw their weapons to the ground. They put up their hands and slowly turned around. They looked more exhausted than I was. I walked to side trying to get the best angle on each of them, but they didn't look like they would try anything.

There was sound of someone approaching from the trees. The for of them turned, expecting to see one of their patrolmen, when the gunner carrying the pilot on his back came into the clearing. They saw the Yukes and nodded to me, understanding.

One of the Yukes then started to laugh. Softy at first and then almost uncontrollably, and the other three soldiers looked at him like he was insane.

"Holy shit. Okay, I have had it. You win, pilot," he said, with a wide grin on his face.

I didn't say anything, though I was almost certain he had lost what was left of his marbles. I kept uncertain if he was going to try to rush me.

The wind suddenly picked up and the chill it sent through me made me realize how much I had been sweating.

"Relax. I'm done with this war. I don't care anymore. All of it. The invasion…whatever. Honestly I don't know what we were thinking when we started this. They said something about a bombing in Munich or….ah." He shrugged. Then looked me up and down, which caused him laugh even more. "Nagase huh? That's a good name. Certainly suites you. I must say, I was completely wrong. All of us. We had you pegged for the toughest and ugliest son-of-a-bitch. Oh shit we were wrong. You're definitely wiliest woman I've ever met."

The fighter passed overhead. And then the sound of approaching helicopters became audible. Sea Goblin was coming.

He continued, "You must be really something for them to send fighters after you. You guys really are the Razgriz."

Razgriz.

The demon from the land of fairy tales.

I couldn't imagine then what would mean for us then.

I could only feel pride, for us, for Captain Bartlett, and for myself.


	22. Grimm

Fire

It happened on the seventeenth of November.

Well, it was strange for me, honestly. The Captain and Nagase always flew so perfectly with each other. I didn't think anything could stop either of them. Well, that was my impression of it. Nagase was so powerful with the Captain on her wing. They were titans to me.

It was honestly one of the least combative sorties we had up to that point. After the munitions raid into the Lake Dama Region and operation "Long Harpoon," where we sunk the Hrimfaxi, a simple air cover operation didn't worry me at all. I guess I was a bit conceited, but I really felt that rescuing a bunch of POW's from an internment camp was going to be a cake walk.

Even Hamilton seemed to almost to write it off for us as he briefed, and the Base Commander wasn't even there.

"It's as straight forward as they come," he said. "You'll be the only squadron deployed for this operation."

The lights went back on as he turned off the projector. Chopper was nearly asleep. The Captain was quickly reading through a list of enemy assets in the upcoming combat area. Nagase was only one who seemed off. She was usually the most attentive of all of us, no matter how boring it was. She was almost slumped back in her chair, gently resting her forehead against her right hand, like she was in deep thought.

I began to think she was just a bit more tired than usual, and then the Captain started to speak.

"Sir, how can we be certain the enemy won't divert more air power to the area when we engage the enemy planes?" he asked.

Hamilton grinned at the Captain. "Well that would normally be a problem under different circumstances, but our air forces have been hammering enemy air bases since the Howl Offensive began ten days ago. This has pushed the Yukes to spread their fighter squadrons very thin over the entire front. To make things short, an area of low strategic importance such as Glubina has been relatively abandoned by the Yuktobanian Air Force. Which makes this the perfect time for a rescue operation. Intelligence had concurred that theses are the only fighters within a 2,500 square mile area. That compounded with a snow storm in the region, means that the Yuke planes are out of radio range. The only way that the enemy can call for reinforcements in via wire communications in the radio room. So long was hold it, they can't call for help."

"So we break in and run before they can even blink. If only our last few missions had been so well thought out," Chopper retorted.

It seemed funny to me, given our last mission. Though, Hamilton gave me the worst scowl as he caught me laughing.

"It might not be that flashy but you'll be helping our people get out of a frozen hell hole," Hamilton added.

I looked at Nagase, who hadn't changed from her slumped position. Something seemed wrong. Her eyes caught mine as I starred and I quickly looked away, trying not to blush.

All the while Hamilton kept talking. "You'll be launching in one hour. That's all there is."

Hamilton exited. and we all stood. Nagase still seemed faraway.

"Well, I can't say this is one of our more unusual mornings," Captain Chopper was saying. "Sometimes I think they plan these sorties like this just so I have go the day without eating."

"You can sneak some energy bars in your flight suite," the Captain responded. "I've done it a few times."

"That's hardly a meal though kid. I'm talking a real breakfast here. I for once in two months would like a descent steak, some eggs, maybe a little hashbrowns, some fruit salad on the side. I barely have time to get a watery omelet from the mess with this schedule." He threw the briefing booklet onto the table.

Nagase didn't seem to take any notice of the conversation. Chopper's rants were nothing strange, but she often had something to say. She consumed by some problem. She was staring at a Globe, a small one that sat on the end table in the corner of the room.

"You agree with me right Grimm?" Captain Chopper asked me.

"Uh—yes sir."

"You see Blaze? Grimm agrees with me. And when it comes to food, I think he's bit more knowledgeable than you, Captain-stowaway-food-into-your-flight-suit. Man I swear."

Nagase seemed to sigh a bit, and then abruptly began to leave the room.

I'm not sure why I felt I had to stop her. I just imagined something very terrible was going on and that I had to help. It was about the same way when I jumped into Captain Bartlett's spare plane when Sand Island was under attack at the beginning of the war. That, however, worked out in the end.

"Lt. Nagase."

I felt my foot catch the end of a chair, probably mine, and I stumbled forward. Embarrassing…

"Lt Nagase." It seemed like she couldn't hear me even though I was only about ten feet away.

"Lt. Nagase."

"What—is it Grimm?" She responded…rather strongly, while quickly turning around to me. She glared at me with such intensity that I was frozen in place. I knew I had just walked into a hornets' nest. I imagine my face was a bright red beacon as her stare bored into me.

"Well I…just…well you see…in the briefing you—uh, just looked a bit exhausted. I just wondered if were feeling alright or uh…"

If I predicted the future I would have said the World was about to end, right in that hallway.

Nagase seemed to take a deep breath, as though she was going to scream her response at me. She raised her right hand in some gesture, and I just knew that somehow she was going to kill me. It didn't matter how absurd the thought was.

Her hand lingered in the air as she suddenly exhaled, in something that sounded like relief mixed with a great sense of surprise. "A-heh." She ran her hand through her hair. Her eyes darted down to the floor and then back up to mine. "I'm not sick Grimm. I just didn't sleep…I just had a bad dream last night. A very bad dream."

"Oh—a dream." I had no idea what to say.

"Yeah. It's nothing. I'm fine Grimm. You don't have to worry about me."

"Well…okay."

"Okay."

"Uh…"

"You should go get ready Grimm," she said while turning around.

"Uh yes ma'am."

For a moment I was too confused to think, like I had be stunned by a flash bang grenade. Though I never have used one. I had the vague sense then that I had failed, but yet I wasn't even sure of what had just happened. Before I could compute it all though, Captain Chopper hung his left arm around my neck.

"Well—I can't say I haven't suffered a few rejections like that," he commented.

"What? No I wasn't…I never even thought about…" I tired to explain, but every sentence seemed to prove the point that I was trying to refute. I just wanted to help. I would never attempt to start a relationship with Captain Nagase. Not that I didn't think she was attractive. I think she's very beautiful. Any man on the base would find her attractive. But there are regulations. And considering her close friendship with the Captain, him being my commanding officer, it would be entirely unethical for me to…try anything.

Before I could explain all of that to Captain Chopper he said, "Relax Grimm. I'm just joking with you. Though if you ask me, you guys would be good together."

"I was just asking her if she was feeling okay."

"Oh yeah, probably about that dream she had, right?" My head spun around.

"You knew about it?"

"Yeah. Hey ease up. Her quarters are down the hall from mine, so tend to hear about these things."

" Things…What happened?"

"Well it was pretty bad. The watch officer took her down to the medical ward. But relax she's fine. The doc gave her a clean bill of health. She's fine," Chopper replied nonchalantly.

The entire thing was just unsettling to me. She didn't look fine during the briefing. In fact she looked anything but fine. People don't usually go to the ER for bad dreams.

"Anyway let's go grab something before we have to suite up. Can you believe Blaze? Stuff energy bars in your flight suite?" Chopper muttered as he pushed me down to the mess.

Captain Chopper seemed to have an innate talent at barely meeting deadlines. It really baffles me hoe he seemed to schedule everything so tightly. But he still was never late, or at least not by that much. We must have spent close to an hour eating in the mess, so I thought, yet we were still on the tarmac just as the Captain and Nagase were. I wish I had that ability.

It was an incredibly fast push to the target area, much faster than anything I did in training at least. Though then again, I didn't quite have the complete standard training that the Captain, Nagase and Chopper got. They got to train with Captain Bartlett. I technically never even completed my flight instruction. And with the supersonic jump we were doing into Yuktobania, I kept reminding myself of that uncomfortable fact over and over again.

I had never been to Glubina, or anywhere in Yuktobania. Actually I have never been outside the Osean Continent. In fact before the briefing I had never even heard of Glubina. Even the iconic Vladimir Mountains were a bit hazy. I suppose my older brother was right, I didn't study enough in school. It was obvious we were going pretty far north, like we did when we were deployed to the Razgriz Straights. So I knew there would be a good deal of snow. Still I had never seen a landscape like that.

Snow and ice virtually blanketed everything. I found it really breathtaking. I found myself wishing I could have taken Genette's camera, even though that probably was a horrible breach of protocol. But still maybe the Captain wouldn't have minded. Then again, the bad weather probably wouldn't have made for great pictures. Snow clouds obscured everything in an azure haze.

And I had thought it would be easy to see the POW camp. Though the cover of the storm gave us an advantage over the Yukes, I was a bit concerned I would find someway to crash into something.

"This is Archer," I said, after awhile. "Captain can you see the POW Camp?"

"Not yet," the Captain replied.

"Well we should be able to see it soon," Chopper commented.

I reflexively took a deep breath. Pops had told me that breathing control was one of the best ways to manage yourself against the high stresses of flying. Simply control your breathing, it's really brilliant when you think about it. I had gotten into the habit since the invasion of Sand Island, or rather the almost-invasion of Sand Island. It really helps. Nagase used it too, I think at least.

Maybe she learned it from Captain Bartlett?

Well, the thought had actually been lingering in my mind for some time, actually ever since the briefing started at 1000 hours. Everyone at the base had concluded that Captain Bartlett had been captured by the intelligence ship that had shot him down. The enemy declared war shortly before that happened. So technically he could be…

Anyway I was hesitant to bring it up since the others knew Bartlett much better than I did. But then I realized they probably thought about it before I did.

"Do you think the Captain…uh…I mean Captain Bartlett. Do you think he's in there?" I asked.

Chopper answered first. "I bet he is. He's probably busy cursing out the other POW's and taking charge right now. Right Nagase?"

Nagase didn't say anything. It was only then that I sort of realized what was going on in her head.

Captain Chopper seemed to have already known. "You're not still blaming yourself are you?" he asked her.

Blaming herself?

"No…" she said, though she spoke it softy.

I've mentioned this before, but I didn't join the Squadron until the night after Captain Bartlett was shot down. Thus, I really didn't know the circumstances of his capture. Nagase never mentioned it to anyone, especially me. Among the three of them it was a bit of a sensitive topic, not to mention it had become a major reason for the military High Command to distrust us. For Nagase, I guess it must have been slowly disturbing her normally impeccably strong center. To me she seemed so calm all the time, the anchor of the Squadron. Even with her morose appearance at the briefing, I didn't even remotely think it could affect her flying or her judgment.

Before I could give it any more thought, we reached the airspace over the POW Camp.

"Fighters I can hear the roar of your engines approaching. Ah, this is Sea Goblin. Man, I thought if I joined the Marines I'd get to work on tropical beaches all the time. We've safely recovered the POW's. Guess our 'copters not here yet," a marine from Sea Goblin said. I felt like I knew him. I had a few friends in the Marines.

"You're gonna have to baby sit 'em a little longer. I'm picking up enemy planes on my radar," Captain Chopper said. I'm not sure how he saw anything. My radar was almost non-functional due to the snowstorm. I had to stare at it for a moment before I saw anything.

"Tally ho, I see them too," Nagase responded.

"Roger. You're that squadron from Sand Island right? Can't wait to see you do your stuff," Sea Goblin said.

"Alright Wardog, we only have a few minutes to sanitize the airspace," the Captain stated.

"I copy Captain," I responded. "We have to take care of all of them so the helicopter and get through."

"Way to state the obvious Grimm," Captain Chopper commented, which made me feel a little embarrassed. "Well let's do it before we all freeze. C'mon Grimm," he said to me.

Captain Chopper was the element lead of the Squadron. That meant he was basically in charge of when we engaged the enemy. Most of the time, it was fine. Actually I think we worked very well together. Only the Captain and Nagase out did us in kills and performance. Still sometimes Chopper would push things a little too far. Like that time…

There were four enemy planes on radar, four standard Yuktobanian SU-27's, fully armed for air-to-air combat. They broke off into pairs the moment they noticed us, just like we had. So it was one-on-one. It was going to be fairly easy, if executed it right. At least I was thinking that.

It was very hard to get a good visual on them. They were definitely painted a camouflaged blue that made them just dark dots against the white haze of the clouds. Still, I was reasonably there coming right at us.

"Uh—Lt. Chopper?" I said.

"Just sit tight Grimm. I almost got a lock on this guy. We'll take 'em on long range so we don't have to chase them down."

I looked at the IFF. It was only working partially as well as normal because of the bad weather. Still there was no doubt that time. They were flying right toward us.

"They're coming head-on shouldn't we angle way so they don't shoot at us?"

"Relax Grimm, I'll have both these guys before they ever get a lock…whoa-o…" he abruptly said.

And at that moment my radar tracking warning came on. I was spiked.

"Damn."

I pushed the throttle to the max, plunging down twenty degrees from the vector of the bogey that was targeting me. I was looking at the IFF and had my head forward, so the acceleration slammed my head against the seat. The spike didn't end though and looking up I could see the Flanker angling to get on my six when I passed him.

"Oh dammit," I cursed aloud again. I had made a mistake. Once he was on my tail he would have a perfect shot.

"Damn, damn."

I had to do something. If I pulled up though, I'd be in range of his guns, and I had no idea where his wing man was. Still if he got a missile lock I'd be in a lot more trouble. A split-s might get him off my tail. I was low though. I might slam into the ground. And that was a yet bigger problem. Still…

I almost knew what to do when I saw the flash of a missile destroying an aircraft. The alarm went off, and for a moment I was a bit stunned till Captain Chopper's voice came over the radio.

"Hey see? I told you I had him. He almost had me though. Man, you alright Grimm?"

"Uh—yeah…"

"Good. Why don't you shoot down the other one? He's right in front of you."

He was. The Flanker was fleeing the scene at full throttle. Too bad I couldn't let him get away.

"Archer, fox 2." The missile hit. Shack on the target. His plane began to lose altitude quickly and he bailed out. At least he made it out.

"There you see Grimm? It was easy," Chopper said.

"Yeah easy."

"What's that supposed to mean?"

I had an amazingly witty response to that, but the Captain hailed us.

"Grimm, Chopper how about you?"

"We got 'em Kid, not to worry. Don't have a clue where the rest of them are though," Captain Chopper responded.

"Roger. We can't detect them on radar unless we get close. We'll just have to fly around till we find them," the Captain responded.

It didn't take us very long to sniff out the other planes. Actually they seemed to come to us, probably tipped off from the first group we engaged. Honestly it was so quick I don't even remember how many more planes there were or who shot them down, or whatever else happened. To me at least, compared to dog fighting while dodging burst missiles, the task was nothing at all.

I guess complacency can happen to anyone.

I do know though that the Captain shot down the last one, really quickly too.

"Splash one bandit. I think that's all of them," he said, and the IFF seemed to confirm, along with our preflight data.

"Yeah, unless there more planes they didn't tell us about," Chopper commented. "I wish we could have more missions like this, no giant submarines shooting burst missiles at us. I could almost sleep up here."

I felt a need to comment to that comment. "Don't just yet. We still have to cover the helicopter."

"I know that. I just wish we could get a break some time soon," Captain Chopper responded.

"Well we short of did, these last few days," I said, which was mostly true. We hadn't flown any combat missions since the Razgriz Straights, in my defense.

"That wasn't a break Grimm, not a real one at least. I'm talking about an actual vacation, some real leave time for once. Hell we live on a damn tropical island and we can't enjoy it."

I had sympathy to his point of view, but there was a war going on. And the Air Force was kind of counting on us. "Well they can't just let us…"

"That's enough you two," the Captain cut me off. "We're still in the middle of an operation."

I think I won the argument though.

It was then I noticed the increased radio chatter. I pushed the frequency to try to clear it up. That's when I heard gunfire clearly over the static.

"What's going on down there?" I wondered.

It didn't take long before I got an answer.

"This is Sea Goblin. Combat has broken out in the camp. You have control of the airspace now right?"

"This is Wardog," the Captain replied. "Copy that Sea Goblin. Air superiority is ours. You can call in the taxi now."

"Ha, I knew we could count on you. Okay we're going to get everyone out of here."

"Alright team, let's form up," the Captain ordered and Chopper and I resumed the finger four formation. We then changed vector toward the camp. The wind was really becoming fierce by then. During the turn I could feel the Hornet trying to pull the nose up. I knew the jet was rated for those conditions but it was still unnerving.

And the weather was only getting worse.

The POW Camp was barely visible from the air, little more than a bunch of black hulking shapes on the ground. I was starting to wonder if the helicopters could make it through those conditions. My worry ceased though hen the IFF showed them incoming. They must have had top rated pilots.

Sea Goblin was even more relieved than I was. "Whew this is Sea Goblin our ride's here. The ground is still crawling with weapons installations though, so they can't land. Could you blow them out for us?"

"Roger that Sea Goblin," the Captain said.

"Great," Sea Goblin continued. "Our guys are mixed in here so targets will be marked. Don't drop any bombs on us."

"Blow them out," Chopper began. "I can barely see anything in this haze," he said, which was quite ironic since as he spoke we started taking gunfire from the surface.

With the Marines marking the targets with lasers it made destroying the AA systems much easier than it usually is. Targeting from the air takes much longer, and is less accurate. I personally always had a little trouble with that part, mostly because the only instruction I had was crash course that Pops gave me during some downtime after I joined the Squadron. It was just so technical. It made me wish I had gone through the full two years that Captain Chopper, Nagase and Blaze went through. I suppose it was no wonder why I was always playing catch up.

Nagase took point. She didn't even wait for the Captain to give her orders before she started destroying the AA installations at the southern edge of the camp. I dropped my two 500-lb bombs on two adjacent SAMs toward the center. Circling around I could confirm it was destroyed, but it was difficult to see exactly how much damage was done. Anyway, those were the only two bombs I had.

"Nice shot Blaze," I heard Nagase say.

"Thanks. I think we've destroyed most of them."

"There is still some fire coming from the edge of the Camp. I'll take care of them Kid," Captain Chopper reported.

"Copy that Chopper."

It took Captain Chopper only moments to destroy the site. Target hit, and then all fire coming from the ground had ceased. No radar spikes, no tracer fire. Even the Marines reported that all anti-air sites had been neutralized. There was still some resistance coming from the Yuke base personnel, but that was the Marine's problem. Our part was done.

To sum it up, I was complacent as any other time before it had gone all terrible.

"You alright Nagase?" I heard the Captain ask.

"I'm fine. I just want to get those people out of there," she replied.

"Yeah." There was something about the Captain's tone, almost like he was reading something that I couldn't perceive. He did know her much better than I did though. "You really think he's in there?"

"Where else do you think he'd be?" she asked.

Personally I really did hope he was in there. Not only would he be a big boost to our squadron, it would have helped to improve our standing with Central, especially since the incident with the Yuktobanian Engineering College. I thought so at least. I didn't actually learn the reason for our commanders' skepticism of Captain Bartlett and our squadron till much later. At that moment I just thought the top didn't like us just because of Captain Blaze.

It was a few minutes later when the HH-9B Gunship arrived to give support to the marines, and the two CH-47 helicopters were right behind. The Yukes had no chance of stopping the rescue at that point. We had it made in the shade now.

"Looks like the POW's will be rescued in a few minutes," I stated.

"Yeah, just wait till they're back in their old jobs getting over worked like us. I bet they'll want to be back in that camp," Captain Chopper said.

"I wouldn't count on that. This place isn't exactly a vacation stop," the Captain commented, to which I disagreed. There was plenty of snow to go skiing on. It was pretty cold though.

Chopper responded, "Yeah, and the weather just keeps getting worse too." That was certainly true.

The helicopters landed, and al enemy activity on the ground was effectively silenced. Then the Marines began to load the former POW's.

"Okay, thanks for taking out the trash. We're taking the POW's outside now. Can you see their smiling faces?"

No, I couldn't from where I was. I'll admit though I was very curious. I could barely see the landing pad from my altitude.

"Heh heh. Nagase's actually going down to look," Chopper said. I didn't even notice her break formation. I thought about following her for second, then quickly decided no. I couldn't just break formation like that, not without permission from the Captain. Still, he let Nagase get away with it.

"Sea Goblin is Captain Bartlett there?" she asked. "Check for a Captain Bartlett."

"No…no one named Bartlett here. Hey what about you?" the Marine asked the other helicopter.

"Nope. Not here. None of the other POW's have ever heard of him either."

I was a bit disappointed. I didn't know him that well though. I never even formally met him though. I only remember him yelling at me once for screwing up once when I was helping the mechanics. He never did any of the replacement pilot training.

For Nagase though, I imagine it was much more than that.

"But that can't…" she stopped midsentence. "…Look just check for me one more time."

It was an odd combination of empathy and embarrassment I felt for her. I angled my right wing down, rolling maybe 10 ° to get a view of her plane. She was probably five hundred feet above the deck, maybe a thousand bellow our altitude. She wasn't that low though, and the ground was quiet. There was no real danger, or so it seemed. Even in hindsight I still don't think either the Captain or Nagase did anything egregiously wrong. No one can predict all the outcomes of one's actions. That's just the nature of the Universe.

Though if anyone could, it would be the Captain.

The missile was fired from a bunker somewhere near the side of the Camp. It didn't even look like a bunker from the air. It looked pretty benign actually.

I was in shock. It seemed to move slowly, yet it was so fast I couldn't do anything in time.

"Aw dammit Nagase!" Chopper yelled. I wonder how the Captain reacted.

I saw the light of her engines as the F-18 pulled up and away from the missile, and then there was another explosion on the ground. The Gunship had just destroyed the SAM site that had fired on her.

The Captain immediately pulled a hard left trying to follow her vector. Chopper followed him and I followed Chopper. We stopped shortly and leveled off and I frantically scanned the sky for her plane.

I founder her. She had already reached our altitude and then some. She pulled a hard left to evade. A moment later the missile detonated.

Before I knew she had been hit, I saw the flash from the ejection seat, think at least.

The Captain was openly cursing on the radio.

"God—Dammit."

The radio came alive with a flurry of chatter, made even worse by the bad weather. I didn't really listen, but I could tell most of it was from the Marines wondering what was going on.

Before I knew it I was trying to raise her on the radio. "Nagase, do you read? Lt. Nagase are you alright?" I said several times.

She didn't respond for several moments. "I'm fine. My plane's trashed but those are always replaceable."

I was relieved to say the least. Now we just needed to pick her up. It seemed serendipitous that we already had helicopters in the area for rescue.

Sea Goblin was already taking the imitative. "Sea Goblin to gunship we're taking our guests home now. Can you guys rescue her?"

"Roger, weather conditions are getting worse. We'd better step on it," the Gunship responded.

By that time we had already taken positions over the area she had landed. But it was really futile to try and see her from the air. The Gunship was understating how bad the snowstorm was by then. We had enjoyed partial visibility during the operation, but it was quickly approaching zero. It was like a scene from a frozen apocalypse. Everything from the sky to the ground was covered in a white curtain, and the wind was strong enough cause problems even at our altitude. It wasn't going to be an easy rescue.

"Lt. Nagase, the Gunship is coming to pick you up," I said expecting her to acknowledge. And…

For a moment I thought I heard her voice. Then there was just a loud squeal of static, followed by nothing but white noise. Nature just wasn't on our side this time. Though it didn't seem like much of a problem. The Gunship was almost there.

"Landing point confirmed roger. Heading in to pick her up."

I could see it from the air. They were moving fairly quickly against the wind toward a narrow clearing. Feeling what the wind was doing to my plane, I was getting concerned they would have trouble landing. But even if they couldn't land, the HH-9B could pick up from the air. Though, that would pose challenging in those conditions as well.

The Gunship froze in the air and began to descend. And then I saw the faint flash of an explosion as it smashed against the ground.

"The Gunship crashed!"

"Dammit! The storm's too strong," Sea Goblin said.

"Grimm can you see if the crew made it?" the Captain asked me.

I scanned the area around the crash site, but the visibility was just too poor. Even the gunship itself was barely visible from our altitude.

"Negative Captain. I can't see anything from up here."

"Stand by. I'm going low to take a look."

The Captain broke off, leaving Chopper and myself alone.

"Sea Goblin you gotta send another 'copter in there," Chopper yelled.

"No can do Wardog. If the Gunship crashed there's no way we'll get one of these birds in there. We don't have enough fuel either."

"We can't just leave her behind!"

As much as I hated it, I knew Sea Goblin was right. There were possibly tow additional persons out there to Captain Nagase. The twin Ch-47's were at capacity, and the HH-9B, which was more maneuverable than the CH-47's crashed trying to navigate through the winter storm. We didn't have a choice.

"Look I hate it too, but we have to wait for conditions to get better before we can do anything," I said.

I could hear him swear under his breath over the radio. I couldn't help but feel a profound disappointment for having said that.

The Captain then returned to our wing.

"No joy. No signs of life on the ground," he said.

There was a palatable silence at that moment.

Chopper wasn't going to have it though. "Kid, we gotta fly to the Field HQ and request a combat search and rescue."

"I don't have any authority to make any request like that. We'll have to do it at debrief. We have to finish the mission," I could hear the undertones of anger, and a deep seated sadness when he said that.

"Dammit Blaze! She's not going to last long out here!"

"Neither will a rescue team. That's enough. We're withdrawing."

"Heh…" I imagined Chopper on the verge of exploding, as though he would suddenly break formation and try to rescue her in his F-18. "So there's nothing we can do?"

"Right now, yeah."

"Dammit!"

"You said it," Sea Goblin commented.

As we left the airspace the Sun began to set, and all my limbs began to tingle with the menacing sensation of dread.

There wasn't anything unusual about the flight back. We had to fly toward the Bastok Peninsula to rendezvous with a tanker craft. We refueled then flew straight back to Sand Island. No, there was nothing unusual about it, except that there were only three of us.

It's hard to really describe the mood everyone was in. Personally I was lost and confused in more ways than one. There were so few of us in the Squadron, and Nagase was such a talented pilot. I couldn't really accept that she had been shot down by a SAM.

As to what the Captain and Chopper were feeling, I still don't have a clue.

When we arrived at Sand Island it was raining. I forgot the forecast for that day. It was the first storm we had had in awhile. Which was a bit strange, since it was a tropical island. It made landing a jet a bit more difficult. I had only ever flown a few times in rainy weather, and I was still was getting used to it then. But I made it through without a hitch.

There was no conversation once we got out of our planes. I saw the Captain leave before I even stepped outside of the cockpit. That wasn't that strange. He often did slip away after sorties without a word. Chopper just grumbled a bit and followed him out. That was strange.

For a moment I didn't step down. The sight of the Captain and Chopper like that, it seemed to move something great within me. I felt a bit like Alice, falling down the rabbit hole.

We had a hangar to ourselves, Wardog Squadron. It was fairly small, just big enough to comfortably four F-18 Superhornets. When Bartlett was in command, when I first arrived at the base to begin my replacement pilot training, the Squadron had three full sized hangars. At one point, there were as many as twenty five aircraft in the Wardog Squadron. That was a long while ago though. When the war began those hangars were used to house the Lynx and Wizard units, but they had been transferred to frontline bases. So those three hangars were very empty, except for some spare and training aircraft. It was just the four of us, sitting in vigil like great gulls over the white shores of Sand Island. Except then it was only three.

I found myself drawn to the space that usually housed Edge's plane. I don't know. It almost seemed like hallowed ground, even with Nagase thousands of miles away. I walked up to it and stopped, restraining myself as though there was some invisible aircraft there to obstruct me.

"The Ghost of the Aircraft."

"What?" I turned around to like I had seen a ghost to the voice behind me.

It was Pops, the same jovial and stern man that was one of my instructors for my pilot training. I had gotten to know him very well over those past few months. So well in fact, I always seemed to forget that he outranked me.

"Oh! Sir!" I did some hasty stand-to-attention and saluted him. My brother always told me that forgetfulness would get me into trouble.

"Please! Grimm I've told you over and over that you don't need to do that with me."

"Uh—You out rank me."

"Yeah…so?"

"Ah…" I wasn't sure what point he was trying to make, but I acted like I understood.

"Right. As I was saying, the Ghost of the Aircraft."

"What is that?" I asked. Though it seems obvious now, at the time I really didn't know what he was talking about.

"It's a sort of superstition that started during the last war." He walked up to where I was and stood next to me. "When a pilot would go down, his squadron-mates would often avoid any space where or his aircraft usually had been. Sometimes it was because it was because they didn't want to catch any of his bad luck and take it with them into the air. The rest of the time though, it was because the other pilots still think the fallen pilot is still there with his plane, and that they shouldn't disturb it."

A ghost? I did in someway think Nagase was still there somehow. Maybe not think but certainly it felt like it. I'm not sure why. I never was religious or spiritual, or superstitious.

"Ah—Lt. Nagase was shot down," I said tersely. I tried to think of someway to pad the truth, but nothing seemed appropriate.

Pops just nodded for a, almost he had seen it happen.

"Over Yuktobania right?"

"Yeah."

He didn't react at all. He just stared at the empty space in the hangar, at the ghost of Edge's plane.

"She'll make it."

"Wh…" I began to say. "How do you know?"

"You'd better get out of that flight suit. You don't want to be late for the debriefing," he said, then turned and walked away.

I wanted to ask him again, why he was so confident about Nagase. He seemed to know it as an absolute.

Being shot down is no joke. Those that survive the missile face a high likelihood of capture. We were all trained for it but…it's just something even the most intense training often fails to prepare someone for. Still, now I think I understand a bit of what he meant. If there ever was a pilot with the skill to make it, Nagase would be that pilot.

Pops was right about another thing too. I was almost late to the mission debriefing.

The Captain and Chopper were already there. They had arrived a good seven minutes ahead of me.

I had run all the way from the hangar to the locker room to the Crew Ready Room, and my breathing showed it.

I burst through the partly ajar door, holding the edge so it didn't go slamming into the wall, or one of my superiors. I can only imagine the trouble I would have gotten into if I had done it to the Base Commander. I wouldn't put it beneath him to court marshal me for it.

The Captain and Chopper were both seated on opposite sides of the short conference table at the head of the room. Chopper was on the farthest side, and he glared at me when I entered.

"There you are! What were you doing, dancing in the rain?" he scolded me.

"No I was—Ah no excuse."

"Okay."

I walked over and sat down by Chopper, where I usually sat, right across from Captain Nagase. Except she wasn't there.

The Captain didn't even look up when I sat down. He had the same expression as Nagase did before, like some demon was hovering over his head, some terrible burden.

Chopper the leaned forward in his chair, giving the Captain some strange sardonic stare. "Can't you look anymore upset Kid?"

If looked could kill, the Captain could have brought down an entire squadron the stare he gave Chopper at that moment. Honestly, if it had been me, I might have had a nervous breakdown. The Captain had such a fierce look. I found it difficult sometimes to look him in the eye. A subtle mix of hazel-green and red made them look like they were on fire. I think even the old Base Commander tensed up when the Captain was angry.

The Captain looked down after leering at Captain Chopper, not saying anything in response. And Chopper didn't say anything either to fill the gap. That was strange.

We sat in a bizarre silence for a few minutes. I felt like I need to say something after a moment, anything to break the tension. But I was too afraid. I see now how badly it had affected the Captain and Chopper. We really did lose a piece of ourselves when we lost Nagase in Yuktobania.

The door at the head of the room finally opened, and Hamilton entered the room followed closely by the old Base Commander. We all rose and stood at attention.

"At ease," Hamilton said. We sat down, but the chair under me suddenly felt a lot more uncomfortable.

I noticed then that Hamilton had a thin folder in hand, with red bars long the edges indicating restricted material. He didn't usually bring any new information to debriefings. He glanced over it before looking back up to us.

"About twenty minutes ago we received and have been reviewing a coded transmission from Central Command. It concerns the recent operations and performances of the 108th Sand Island Detachment of the 2nd Air Division. Specifically it details the events of your recent mission to rescue Osean POW's from the enemy internment camp in the region of Glubina. All Osean military prisoners of war were recovered with zero casualties, with the loss of one Marine HH-9B Gunship and crew, and the loss of one Air Force F-18 Superhornet with pilot. Giving these results Central Command has declared the rescue operation Back Haul an overwhelming success, and extends it thanks to the Sand Island Squadron."

"Some 'overwhelming' success," I could barely hear Chopper mutter. I wonder if the Captain heard it?

Hamilton continued, "Concerning Captain K, Nagase of the Sand Island Squadron…"

"Captain Nagase?" I said to myself. This was when we found out.

I saw the Captain's eyes narrow, but my attention was torn to the front of the room as Hamilton continued.

"…Colonel Perrault will issue orders on her behalf. Central Command will replace Captain Nagase's plane which was lost in the operation," Hamilton ended.

The Base Commander took the center as Hamilton moved to the side. "None of the POW's saw Bartlett at the interment camp. Now here could he be I wonder?" It seemed like and odd thing to say. I still wonder what bad blood existed between Captain Bartlett and the Colonel. "Upon more favorable weather conditions, we will carry out a rescue operation for Captain Nagase. That's right you've all been promoted yet again. You guys are burning through the ranks you know that? You can thank High Command for it. You can spell out the details Hamilton."

My face went cold, or maybe it was warm? Even in thee grimness of the situation, I still felt the excitement. It was something I had been hoping for, for awhile.

Out of the four of us, I was the only one without an officer's commission. If the War had not started I would have spent another three months in the Replacement Pilot's Training Corps. Upon completion of that I would have been given a "temporary" promotion from Airman First Class to Senior Airman. That would have lasted up to two years till I would be chosen for a fighter squadron, or a bomber squadron or…whatever. When that happened I would have received an officer's commission as a 2nd Lieutenant. That was my entire aim, my lofty goal when I joined the Osean Air Defense Force. I wanted to be a commissioned officer. That's what motivated me to study during my downtime with Pops and other instructors and helping out the mechanics to learn as much as I could about aircraft, aerodynamics, engineering and whatever else I needed. To be a commissioned pilot. That's what I wanted ever since I first heard about the Replacement Pilot Training Corps.

Of course that didn't happen.

Even so, I think it was luckier for me that things turned out the way they did. I sometimes can't believe I had the nerve to jump into the cockpit of Captain Bartlett's reserve plane, though the sound of bombs hitting the base was a strong motivator. Then I was flying with the Captain, Nagase and Captain Chopper. Things from that point of view could not have been more serendipitous.

Despite all the things we've done as a squadron, however, I was still an Airman First Class. I wasn't even a non-commissioned officer. Technically I was still supposed to salute that staff sergeant that had the watch by my room. Though he let it slide awhile ago, unless the Base Commander was nearby.

So I crossed my fingers under the table. But in the back of my mind I knew it was a bit unlikely.

Hamilton took the floor again, and began to read from the transmission from Central Command. "As of November 18th 0374 hours Oured Standard Time, 1st Lieutenants Blaze Arré, Kei Nagase, and Alvin Davenport had been awarded commissions as Captains of the Osean Air Defense Force," he said.

I waited, but I already knew it wasn't going to happen. Not yet at least .

Hamilton seemed to freeze, it might have only been two seconds, but it was enough to make Captain Chopper jump in.

"Wait, you forgot one," he said. I winced.

I heard the Base Commander groan as Chopper said that, threatening to bring his wrath down upon us.

Hamilton had no reaction.

"As for Airman First Class Hans Grimm, in recognition his exemplarity service and performance he will be awarded the Bronze Cross and receive a pay raise to E-7, effective immediately."

It didn't happen, but it was a good consolation. I really didn't care that much about the pay raise but a Bronze Cross was nice.

Hamilton kept speaking though. "A special request for an officer's commission has also been submitted by Air Division HQ to the office of the Chief of Staff of the Air Force, and is currently under review," he concluded.

"That's hardly a consolation," Chopper exclaimed, nearly jumping out of his seat.

"Knock it off—Captain," the Base Commander warned.

Captain Chopper probably wanted to saw more, but he knew batter than to rail against the old high and mighty emperor Base Commander. I could even see the Captain's eyes meet Chopper's, shaking his head slightly.

"We'll be coordinating the rescue effort with Osean Field HQ. Report for a briefing at 0530 hours. I recommend that each of you try to get some rest. Dismissed."

We all stood as the Base Commander and his adjutant left the Crew Ready Room.

Well, there some good news at least. I didn't get commission but a special request to the Air Force Chief of Staff was nothing trivial. It might take some time, but I had waited that long.

"This is crap," Captain Chopper commented.

We were all still standing in the Crew Ready Room, almost like we were in shock.

"No this is the mother-load of bullshit! The nerve of them not to give Grimm a commission and still make us three Captains. What a joke!"

"It's not up to us when or who gets promotions," the Captain said.

"What? So you think it's fair. C'mon Kid! You of anyone should be upset about this."

"Really?"

The tone of the conversation was getting uncomfortably hostile.

"Yeah. He's one your subordinates. This is you job."

"My job, as squadron leader? And you really don't think I have more important things to get upset over right now?" With those words the Captain walked out, more angry than I had ever seen him up to that point.

It would an understatement to say I was unsettled. The Captain and Chopper had known each other a lot longer than I had known any of them. Arguments between the two of them often got heated for some reason, even when the subject wasn't personal. Though, they were fairly rare.

Chopper sighed heavily after the Captain had stormed out, putting both of his hands on the conference table. "Whew, I'm sorry about that Grimm."

"It's okay." I wasn't quite sure what he was apologizing for.

"No it's not okay, Ah…" he stopped himself, presumably before going on another tantrum. "You know Grimm everything just seems to be screwed up nowadays. Ah anyway, you hungry?"

He got caught me off guard yet again.

"Uh—well. I don't think the mess is open right now."

"C'mon Grimm. It's always open. They just don't serve at this time of night. But I bet we can scrounge some food up."

"Well, I don't know sir."

"C'mon. You're not that tired are you? And I know you haven't eaten anything in the last 12 hours."

I hadn't.

"Well what about the Captain?"

"Let Blaze take care of himself. Besides, he really isn't in the mood for talking right now, trust me." He said as though the previous argument hadn't happened. "Well let's go. We only have about four hours anyway. Not really enough time to get any sleep."

I would have disagreed. I tried to get as much sleep as I could between sorties. Anytime I didn't, I always felt sluggish. But then again, Chopper was probably right.

The mess was open, as Captain Chopper had said, but it was completely deserted, with only the dim light from the vending machines and the small overhead light above the coffee illuminating the room. It was kind of nice actually when compared to the mad house the place was during normal meal times. The only downside was the kitchen was closed.

The only things to eat were some left over pastries from the other morning, and what ever we could get out of the machines. I would have preferred some of the stir fry they had served that night. I could still smell some of it from the kitchen.

I ended up getting some chips and a cup-o-noodles from one of the machines. Two minutes in the microwave, and it was ready. It wasn't half bad. Chopper took of the doughnuts from previous morning, and a sandwich from the machines, and a cup-o-noodles from the machines, and a soda from the machines. He was hungry.

"Well," Captain Chopper began, and then took a sip from his soda. "This is better than nothing. Just hope it holds me till we launch again. I'm definitely going to be hungry during the mission."

"You could always do that thing the Captain was talking about."

"Ha, I really doubt that a few energy bars will do it for me. Maybe for you and Blaze…" he took another sip of his soda. "Anyway, I don't believe they still haven't given you a commission. Hell, they haven't really given you anything."

'Yeah well—I thought it might happen. Since I never formally completed Replacement Pilot's Training, I'm technically not even supposed to be operating an aircraft. I even got a letter of reprimand about it," I said.

"What?" He nearly spit all over me. "They were going to punish you for defending Sand Island?"

"I guess so—Captain Hamilton helped me out with the JAG though. He got them to expunge my record."

"That doesn't make it okay Grimm. Man I swear, the guys at they top just love to screw with us," he shook hi head several times before taking another sip of his soda. Then his face suddenly turned into a smile. "You know what Grimm? I'm going to do you a favor."

I could feel a chord of dread get struck inside of me.

"Uh sir, you don't have to."

"Nah trust me."

That only made me feel worse.

Chopper leaned back in his chair. "Alright, back in the academy I dated this girl. She was a real career nut you know, obsessed with advancing as fats as she could in the military. Honestly, she was a bit of a bitch. Great looking legs though. And she really liked me Anyway as is it so happens last I heard she was working as an administrator for the Air Force Chief of Staff. I'll give her a call, and ask her to put your request for a commission on top of the pile."

"Well, Captain Chopper…couldn't you get in trouble for doing that?"

"Hell if I know. Anyway I'm a Captain now. What exactly are they going do? Just trust me."

I can't say that I felt good about the idea. I did want a commission though. Hopefully there wasn't some massive military regulation we were breaking.

"It's kinda funny," Captain Chopper said. "Three Captains and an airman first class. I bet we're the only squadron in history like this. Too bad Nagase had to be running around Yuktobania right now. Ha, and Blaze thinks he's the only one who cares." He leaned back again, shaking his head.

I thought about the argument between him and the Captain earlier in the Crew Ready Room. I couldn't help but wonder what was going on between them. Some past history…

"Sir—what happened between you and the Captain…"

"Don't worry about it Grimm. Honestly, I was kind of doing it on purpose. With Nagase getting shot down, he needed some goading." He seemed to imply some cosmic extra-meaning into the last sentence.

"Uh, I'm not sure I understand."

"Well c'mon. You've seen the way the two of them are."

I really wasn't getting it. I wasn't deliberately being obtuse.

I knew the Captain and Nagase had met back when they were cadets, and not much more. Sometimes people talked about the _two _of them, but they usually were just joking. I thought they were just really close friends.

"Well I…"

"C'mon. He loves her."

A huge wave of embarrassment and trepidation came over my head. I was never comfortably talking about that sort of thing. It just seemed rude.

"Well I…I'm sure he really cares about Captain Nagase but…"

"Nah. He loves her, and she loves him."

Had I been old I might have had a heart attack and died right there. I was always told you weren't supposed to gossip about those things.

"The thing is though," Chopper continued, "neither of them know it."

It took a moment for process it. My own nerves made me want to run out of the room, and it took a minute for my thinking to return to normal. I always knew they were close, but I was never good at reading other people's intentions. Maybe they did.

Chopper elaborated still further, "I've known Blaze for a few years. Since nearly right after he got out the Academy. He is the kind of guy that prides himself on self esteem. A lot of self restraint, that's why it takes a lot to really get him ticked off. He tries to be a real professional in almost everything he does, and always put his emotions aside. Nagase's pretty similar. They're both really idealistic. And that's probably why they are both blind to their true feelings."

The whole thing had past overwhelming for me. I kept fiddling through my empty bag of chips, just to do something.

"Kid though, he's got a lot to deal with already and Nagase getting shot down is just going to throw a wrench into things. That's why I pushed his buttons a bit. If he's a little bit angry, he'll be a lot more focused when we are flying."

"What do you mean he has a lot to deal with?" I asked.

"Oh yeah, I guess you wouldn't know. Blaze was an orphan."

The news was yet more shocking and personal than before.

"Wh…Really?"

"Yeah. He was raised in some religious institution somewhere. The thing is though, up till like age seven he doesn't remember anything. Completely amnesic. Doesn't even know his real name or who his parents were."

I think my mouth hung open for several moments. The thought itself, the idea of not knowing who you were was just almost too alien for me to grapple with. Home, to not know where your home is…

Chopper noticed my shock. "Yeah, man. Probably through most of his life he's been wondering who he really is. You might say his entire extraordinary career as a pilot is some grand ambition to forge his own identity. Though putting it that way, it sounds kind of cool."

"Nagase though. She became a pilot to realize a dream. Call it romantic, but she wants to fly into the final frontier for humanity, to infinity and beyond. A little lofty right?

"And me, well, I just thought flying fighter jets was just really cool when I was ten. Ha!"

I laughed, mostly because of the irony, but partly because those revelations were on the verge of making me cry.

"I joined because my dad took me to an air show when I was ten. I thought the fighters jets were the most amazing thing ever," I said, adding to Chopper's statements.

We both laughed for several minutes. Still euphoric we moved to the Crew Room, and I fell down onto that small couch that was in the back.

It was all surreal, like I was wondering through a waking dream. My head swam with a maelstrom of misgivings combines with an irreconcilable sense of awe. I doubt I would have understood anything then, not really, not objectively.

The conversation drifted about several other topics, all mundane compared to the previous, none nearly as important. I kept thinking about the Captain. But no matter how hard I thought, it didn't get any easier to understand.

At some point though, Captain Chopper brought the subject back.

"To be perfectly honest though, I feel sorry for the Yukes. I mean it, Kid could single-handedly win this war. It's almost scary. He's one of those few pilots that come around now and again. You know Grimm? Someone special. When he gets in the air tomorrow he'll be an unstoppable force. Hey you know, I used to live in November City when I was little, thirteen or maybe fourteen. It's a nice place, a bit crazy most of time though. Anyway, my dad had a friend there that sued to go on these safaris in Verusia and Usea. He was an armature nature photographer, and his favorite thing to do was to drive a jeep through the savanna and take pictures of all the wildlife. Well he took me and my dad along one time, somewhere in the southern part of Usea. Honestly it was one of the most boring trips I've ever been on. But there was this one part that I'll never forget.

"So we're driving along this large river, on our way back from watching this heard of antelope stand around and eat grass. But then all of a sudden our driver just slams on the breaks, nearly throwing all of us and starts yelling in some gibberish and pointing frantically at the riverbank. Well it took a moment before I saw it, but there was this tiger standing on the edge and just roaring at something in the water. It turned out to be three crocodiles chewing down on this antelope the tiger had killed. Now I thought, well too bad, cats hate water and there are three crocs so there's no way he's getting that back. But then the tiger just jumps into the water, swims out and yanks the thing away from the crocodiles and pulls back onto dry land. And I was like 'holy shit' the thing was so pissed off that he said screw the water, screw the three crocodiles, and took his food back. The entire world was against him and he got it back.

"That's what going to be tomorrow. He's going to be a tiger of the air. And the Yukes could send up their entire air force, he'll tear them all to pieces to get Nagase back. Not that I'm calling her a piece of meat. Ha!"

"Yeah," I said.

The story honestly seemed a bit absurd to me. For one thing it was hard to believe that Chopper had ever been on a safari. More likely he just watched some documentary on the Nature channel, but maybe. But I did think that way about the Captain.

I stood in awe of his flying when he shot down the Yuke ace during operation Foot Print. I stood in awe of his flying when he shot down the rail artillery on the Yuktobanian fleet. Sometimes, he really did seem unstoppable. I wonder if fate really did choose him to be the hero of the War.

I'm not sure, but at some point Captain Chopper left. I vaguely remember him saying "Sit tight." But I was dozing by that time.

And some point later, I'm lying down on the couch.

I'm lying, vaguely aware of people walking up and down the hallway. The room was dark. Someone must have turned off the lights. I didn't care though, I was tired.

I was alone for awhile till someone came in. He had a flashlight pointed at my face, and in front of his. So I couldn't see him.

"You're not supposed to be sleeping now. You need to be awake to fly."

I just want to sleep a little longer. I'm tired.

"I know, but you need to be awake. You need your mind to be clear to fly. C'mon wake up son."

Dad? Is it time to go?

"Yeah. We're going to fly now. C'mon wake up son."

But I'm scarred of flying.

"I know you are, But don't worry I'm here. If we get in trouble your mother will only blame it on me. C'mon it's time to go. We need to help you friend."

That's right. Captain Nagase needs help. She's all alone.

So we went out into the airfield. Dad already had his two seater _Skylark _ready to go. So we both got in and we flew to go save Nagase.

But I was sill lying on the couch, just barely awake.

I've had that dream several times over the past two years. I'm always lying down and my dad comes in to get me up to fly with him. It's always the same, with some small differences.

Two years ago, about when I first enlisted; I got the news that my dad had died. I was away at training and didn't get to come home for several weeks, only for the funeral. It was okay though; my older brother had gotten leave to help my mom. Even now though I still sort of regret the timing of it.

My dad was, for many years, a mechanic in the Marine air guard. He wasn't a combat pilot, but eventually he got a civilian pilot's license and his plane, which he flew me and my brother around in. I was always scared to get in that thing. It was so small, it didn't look like it could fly with its own weight, never mind two people inside it. But my dad could always coax me inside somehow. "Flying is as safe as you make it," he said to me often.

I didn't get over my fear of flying till he took me to an air show when I was ten. After that I was enamored with jet aircraft and flying in general. Though I didn't consider becoming a pilot till much later. But I have my dad and his small _Skylark _to thank.

The irony is though; he died in that small plane. I suppose that's why I have that dream now and then.

So I woke up lying on that couch. And the lights suddenly came on. Captain Chopper had come back.

"Hey. Were you sleeping?"

I mumbled something back.

"Well I hope you slept well. The briefing's right now. C'mon."

My blood pressure felt non-existent as I pulled myself up. I just don't function well without a full night's sleep. Chopper seemed to walk so fast.

I ended up falling behind him. So in my dazed state I started to run and as soon as I rounded the first corner on the way to the Crew Ready Room, I tripped over the foot of someone. It was a fast drop to the tile floor. Luckily I landed on my side and didn't lose any teeth. It's fair to say though, that I was more than just a little upset with the owner of the foot.

"Oh, I'm sorry Grimm." I knew the voice. It was Genette, and why on Earth did he have to be walking right there and right then? "I was just talking with Blaze. He went into the briefing room so I was going back to the crew room. I'm really sorry."

He helped me up, and I was still tired enough to quickly forgive him in my mind. "Ah—It's fine."

I noticed he was holding a thin red book in his hand. I had the faint idea that I had seen it before, but I couldn't place it. I was late…

"You better get going. But I'd like to talk later if that's alright?"

"Sure later." He was always very cordial and polite. He was a kind of person I could never be mad at. But I was too confused to give him any time of day then. I had to go.

It was a quick scamper this time. I was twice as furious at myself for letting it happen twice, within the same six hours even. But ironically I arrived in much the same way as before. Both the Captain and Captain Chopper were already there, seated and ready, 0529 hours.

"Do you get lost coming here Grimm? We could draw you a map you know?" Chopper asked me, and I took the criticism. I did need to be more careful about time.

Hamilton and the Base Commander walked in the moment after I sat down. So I had to stand up again.

Hamilton told us to be seated. And the Base Commander took the floor, while Hamilton operated the projector.

There seemed to be an odd air about the Colonel. For a goof moment, I thought he actually cared about this mission. There was even a touch of pride as he spoke, "Bring back Captain Nagase. Don't make us have to give her a posthumous tow rank promotion.

The projector came on, showing the same region we had flown to the previous day. A large circular area was indicated, along with the known Yuke positions. There were a lot of them.

Hamilton took the floor then. "We're calling this Operation Stray Sheep. It will be a joint operation between the 103rd Tactical Sand Island Detachment and the 3rd Naval Fleet Sea Goblin helicopter squadron. It's sole mission objective in the successful search and rescue of Captain K. Nagase. Now, we have succeeded in locating hr distress EMR beacon, however, this transmission is extremely weak, and we cannot pinpoint her location, beyond the area shown here. Given changes in signal strength though, we can tell that she is moving in this direction. This most likely also means that she is currently under chase by Yuktobanian Patrols. The Wardog Squadron will sweep this airspace to locate Captain Nagase and relay her position to Sea Goblin who will be on stand by here, who will then proceed to airlift her our. Now the helicopter squadron is expected to also face fierce resistance from both enemy air and ground forces. Wardog will need cover Sea Goblin as they ingress and exit the area.

"Now, enemy air strength is all but unknown. But given the situation we are expecting major assets to b diverted to the region. Let me be clear, you will have no back up. If you are unable to locate the Captain before the enemy the mission will end in failure. In short, this entire operation is relying on your abilities as fighter pilots. All your past performances, however impressive are now moot. We expect this to your finest hour. Is that clear people?"

"Yes sir," the three of us said automatically, almost like a chorus. We never got speeches like that from Hamilton of all people.

"You'll launch immediately. Rendezvous with the Sea Goblin Squadron at these coordinates. Dismissed!"

When I first went on a sortie, when the war began, I was driven by an ineffable sense of righteousness. I had a sort of boyish fight-the-good-fight ideal that drove me to disobey orders to defend the base. The feeling quickly faded though as the war dragged on, and its true face came to light.

This though was different than all other times.

It was back.

There was no fear this time as I memorized the mission plan.

There was no fear as I put on my flight suit.

There was no fear as I walked to my F-18, a suddenly beautiful creature of eclipsing power.

There was no fear as I launched from the runway.

There was only the realty of what I saw. There was no emotion, no passion, no terror.

There was only the world, in order and purpose, with the wings of angels and heroes guiding my hands.

And on the faraway horizon, the Sun was starting to rise.


	23. The Princess Comes Home

A/N-To everyone that has been reading this story at one time over the last few years, I owe you an apology for my lack of dedication in updating this story. I began Fire as an over ambitious fourteen year old, and I honestly really wasn't up the task of writing a novelization of Ace Combat 5. I struggled greatly with grammar and just typing, obsessed over length, and let myself get too disheartened when I didn't get a lot of reviews. So over nearly six years I have published only twenty-three chapters, about a hundred and twenty thousand words and I am still not even half way done with the story. Though now that I am much wiser, a much better typist, and dare I say smarter, I am now resolved to finish this long over due story. I hope in the end these coming chapters will be of far greater quality then the earlier ones.

To everyone that has reviewed I can't express enough thanks. As any writer on this site knows, reviews are the greatest reward we get for going through all this effort. It has certainly convinced me to continue the several times I had given up on this story.

Thank you.

-Stonehenge

Fire

I can remember it very well even now. Even after all the time that's past…

"Yo Kid…heh…don't get too reckless on us. I don't want to come back and have fish you out," Chopper said.

It was the 18th of November, midmorning, around 0600 OST, Glubina… now white and beautiful, when the grey mass of clouds are removed from the sky. 10 miles inland, we were almost to the rendezvous point. It was a simple operation plan. Rescue mission. We would find Nagase, and then Sea Goblin would go in, two choppers, and pick her up, while we maintained control of the skies. Easy to understand…but like always the plan was going to be the only simple thing about it.

And the stress was high…I had to consciously stop my foot from tapping uncontrollably against the floor of the cockpit. I had never had so much nervous energy before. Never on any exam I've taken, or any previous mission. But then again, I never had so much riding on my actions before. Orders and mission objects, fighting the Yukes was all another thing, compared the incredible and terrible task of protecting your own. In that moment, over that sky I never felt greater fear of failure. Somehow though in that fear comes resolve, defiance. We would succeed, I knew it in my heart, in my mind. I would prove it then and there in that sky.

"Roger that Chopper. Don't worry. I have no desire to ever go playing around in the snow ever again."

"Yeah, I know what you mean. Hey Grimm you still with us?" he responded.

"Always Captain Chopper. I hope we're not too late."

"Well we'll find out. But don't worry Kid, knowing Nagase, even if they sent the entire Yuke army after here, she would still evade them," Chopper assured him.

"Yeah," I examined our mission time, and sure enough it was time to call it in. "Sea Goblin this is Wardog 1, what's your status?"

"We're in position Wardog. The give us the word when you've found her."

"Good to hear. Grimm, Chopper you guys ready?"

"No…but we don't really have time for that. Let's do it kid!"

"I am as ready as I'll ever be Captain!"

"Alright…Let's begin…" I'm coming Kei.

I understand the question, what was going through my mind. The answer though is a bit unsatisfying; not much. At least not much on the surface. I remember the rescue mission over the POW in all its detail, the mission objectives, the relative enemy strength, the number of planes, the visibility, and whatever. I remember seeing the missile fire from the SAM site and the jolt of fear as its faint contrail chased after Nagase's plane. I remember seeing her go high and then the missile hit and then the relief as she bailed out. So then gunship went in to pick her up and it crashed.

When that happened and was barely able to think of anything at all. Chopper wanted to stay and find her, so did I. But there was no way to conduct a rescue mission with three F-18's, low on fuel and well away from their origin of operations. No there was nothing we could do, and that fact was the most destructive of all. I was powerless…

And that fact absorbed my mind along with the anguish of knowing what a helpless situation Nagase was in. Could she survive the night? Probably…Could she evade capture? Possibly…Could we get in time before the enemy finds her? Maybe…

So that's it…That's about what was going through my mind. Very simple in some respects. Not simple at all in others.

Everything I did after arriving at Sand Island that night was completely out of habit. It was raining, so we followed the usual procedure. Land, roll into the hangar, park it, get out of the flight suit, prepare for debriefing. It was like going to school, you stop remembering the journey after awhile.

Then I was there, first one, in the pilot ready room, briefing room, whatever…The bland topa colored walls, brown carpet, wooden conference table, a projector that lowered from an overhead bulkhead, a white screen that did the same…all the same and absolutely dull.

I was so alone in my thoughts that I didn't even notice Chopper or Grimm come in after me or Hamilton and the Base Commander. But I was trained well enough to know I needed to pay attention, even though it was obvious what they were going to say.

"At ease," Hamilton said, and we returned to our seats. He had a folder in his. I couldn't see but there was only one place the info would be coming from, Central Command.

"About twenty minutes ago we received and have been reviewing a coded transmission from Central Command. It concerns the recent operations and performances of the 108th Sand Island Detachment of the 2nd Air Division. Specifically it details the events of your recent mission to rescue Osean POW's from the enemy internment camp in the region of Glubina. All Osean military prisoners of war were recovered with zero casualties, with the loss of one Marine HH-9B Gunship and crew, and the loss of one Air Force F-18 Superhornet with pilot. Giving these results Central Command has declared the rescue operation Back Haul an overwhelming success, and extends it thanks to the Sand Island Squadron."

"Some 'overwhelming' success," Chopper commented below his breath. It was a bit strange. I had lost a squadron member and it was declared a success. I knew the logic behind. I understood that this was reality. I knew the risks, and when I became squad leader I thought I had everything down. I thought I had all the details worked out, but then I found out what it really means to lose a squad member in combat, my wingman. So this was how Bartlett felt back then…

The Base Commander was speaking. "… Upon more favorable weather conditions we will launch a rescue mission fro Captain Nagase. That's right, you've all been promoted yet again. You can thank High Command for it. You can spell out the details Hamilton."

Captain, I had almost not heard him say it. Hamilton then began to read of our names but was withdrawn by that point. We were being promoted again? Even though it was barely two months since the last promotion we received. Were we really that important to the war effort just because we sunk two submarines?

I had heard the hype. We all had. There was no way to get around it. Any we went, on the base or off the base, anyone we met, in the air or on the ground soldiers had heard of us, and not just heard. We were de-facto celebrities. Still though, fame aside, were we really that strategically important to deserve a rank increase that typically takes years and years to earn, or was this just a morale play by our superior officers. Maybe it something of both?

I knew there was going to be one caveat though, for the youngest member of the group. One caused by damn red tape.

"Wait, you forgot one," Chopper blurted out of order, and I could see the annoyance already start to build on the Base Commander's face.

What he had 'forgotten' was Grimm, who even after all he went through with us was still only an Airman first class. It was probably just some pseudo-legal issue within the division HQ. Grimm never actually completed his pilot's training and thus was technically ineligible for any benefits thereof. Another way to put it is that on our books he was a member of the Squadron, while on others he was a 'continued emergency replacement asset,' or at least the term division HQ used in my one conversation with them about this issue. So Grimm was still not an officer while we were Captains. Three Captains and an airman first class, no doubt it was the oddest rank assemblage in the air force's history.

The Base Commander had enough pull to move things along, no doubt. But he wasn't exactly eager to help us out. Hamilton would be willing, but he was too low echelon for enact much. So what could I do?

A few words were said as Chopper argued with the Base Commander, but like anything with the Commander it was short and unproductive. My thoughts drifted throughout the whole thing. What did our ranks really matter at that point? Grimm would just have to suffer for the moment as an airman. He wouldn't be passed along for that long anyway. Even "they" couldn't get away with that.

"This is crap." Chopper continued after the Commander and Hamilton left. He just wouldn't leave it alone. ""No this is the mother-load of bullshit! The nerve of them not to give Grimm a commission and still make us three Captains. What a joke!"

"It's not up to us when or who gets promotions," I said. I didn't like it, but I still felt like I should be diplomatic. It's my job, jut like it's my job to protect my squad-members. Not that I was doing a very good job at that.

"What? So you think it's fair. C'mon Kid! You of anyone should be upset about this."

"Really?" I couldn't help but seep with anger at his insinuation. Me? I should be upset because Grimm wasn't advancing in the military at the absurdly fast rate that we were? As though we really deserved the rank of Captain after only a few months in active duty? Even in wartime, it was a joke.

"Yeah. He's one your subordinates. This is your job."

"My job, as squadron leader? And you really don't think I have more important things to get upset over right now?"

I may have slammed my fist on the table, or I might have thrown something across the room. Before I could reflect I was already out of my seat, out the door, and outside the building. I felt like a dynamo, just wound up with so much stress and tension that I had to just get out and go, even though I didn't really have any direction or any location in mind. And so I walked till my straggling conscience caught up with me.

I ended up on the second floor of the main barracks, on top an east facing patio/balcony that was were. It had no shade, combined with the concrete made it nearly unbearable during the day, so it always empty. Except the few times when some of the off-duty female officers would go out there to sunbath. But that was a rare occasion.

Early memories of the training squad came back to then. Chopper, Nagase and I walked by there to see a few petty officers out there, three girls. Nagase expressed some envy for some time off. Something like, "Blaze when do we get some time to be busy doing nothing like that?" Chopper then jokingly offered to put sunscreen on Nagase's backside when she decided to go to out there, also the one of the few times I ever saw here resort to physical violence. She knocked him down.

It was one of the funniest things I had seen in my life. You had to have been there, but the bewildered expression on Chopper's face and Nagase's made the whole seen absurd. Even then up on top of that balcony by myself, I couldn't stop myself from laughing uncontrollably.

I didn't have many warm memories like that. I guess I can only blame myself for it. Nagase, those memories I did have, she was in most of them either a bystander that was caught in the mix, or an active participant. She and I had been in the same unit, or at least at the same base for the last six years of my life. And right then and there, she was thousands of miles away stranded in frozen tundra, while I was standing on balcony during a brief lull in a tropical rainstorm. It didn't feel real in sense, but only in a sense. Feelings matter very little in front of the cold face of reality.

What drove me crazy was that she in was in the most intense struggle for her life, and there was nothing I could do to help her. Hell, I couldn't even my subordinates with procedures. Chopper was right about that, I should care more. But really what could I do? I was a skilled trainee that only through fell circumstance became a squad captain. It wasn't even supposed to be me. Thunderhead gave it first to Nagase. She was only reason I was in this position. From that point of view I owed her everything, and yet she was the one to be shot down instead of me. I was supposed to be an ace. What sort of ace can't protect his own squad-mates?

Bartlett, wherever you are I'm afraid you were right. I am not cut out to be a team leader.

It started to rain again. Just it always was at Sand Island, one moment it was dry as a bone and the next it was raining cats and dogs.

I stood there for awhile, hoping for some catharsis that sometimes happens to characters in stories, but none came. It wasn't cold just wet and humid and uncomfortable. It suited my mood though. Yet again I stood alone in misery, with very little hope for the future. I would need to find some soon though, if I was going to survive the rest of this war.

There was a knock behind, barely audible so I just ignored it at first, but it came again much louder and more earnest. I turned around to see Genette, looking somewhat concerned. He opened the sliding door as soon as we made eye contact.

"Hey, you alright? You're getting soaked," he said sincerely.

"Yeah…it's only a water," I replied. He or someone else was bound to have found me eventually. No point in trying to control fate right?

I walked inside and he closed the door behind. Well he was right; I was soaked, much thoroughly than I had thought. Even my socks inside my boots were full of water.

I brushed my hand through my hair, wringing out some of the water. But it was bit pointless. I was going to have to go change before we sortie.

"I heard about what happened," I almost forgotten he was there.

"Yeah, it's bad."

"You alright?"

"I'm fine don't worry. I didn't even take a hit."

"That's good, but that's not what I meant."

"Of course not," I whispered to myself, turning away from him. I was not in mood for this. I had nothing against Genette but _this _was not something he was going to do a front page headline about.

"How did it happen?"

"Her plane was hit by missile. How do you think how?"

"An enemy plane shot her down?"

"No…"

"…but you just said…"

"It was SAM site!" Somehow I had worked myself up into a fury, I don't know why. "She was flying low and…that's it."

"Oh…I'm sorry Blaze. I didn't mean to…"

I looked him in eye. "It's fine. It's been a bad day alright?"

"Sure."

It'd be simple to call the entire thing awkward, but this seemed to surpass all the other odd conversations I had with Genette. We stood there facing each other, waiting for the other to say something or to leave, and I was about the do the later, till I noticed a small red book in hid hands.

"What's that?" I asked looking at it.

"Oh, it's Nagase's. Um…" He walked over to stand by me opening the book. "'A Blue Dove for the Princess,' it's an old children's book. You see the pages had torn off over the years, and for a awhile now, she has been trying to remember what was on those pages. See…"

And I could. It must have over fifty years old, ancient by the time she had first read it. She didn't write in the book itself, but instead inserted notebook paper with the phrases she was trying to recreate. One in particular, next to a large illustration towards the end of the book, a picture a great demon. And even knew what it was…

"Razgriz…" I said.

"Yes, this is pretty famous painting. Or it at least it was during the eighteenth century. Most of artworks were commissioned by the publisher, but some of them, like this one, date back to antiquity. I forget sometimes how old the fairy tale really is."

"Yeah, I know. Supposedly it's been in folklore for the last thousand years," I said, not taking my eyes off the picture.

"Yes that's right. So you do know something about the legend."

"Yeah, not much more that. Actually, Nagase told me pretty much all I do know."

"Really? So you two are really close then," he asked me.

I suddenly became very uncomfortable standing next to him. "Yeah…"

"Blaze," he said and I turned to face him again. "I don't mean to interrogate you about this. I just thought, you more than anyone would be hurt by this. That you would have the most say."

"Yeah well, I guess that's most natural thing to assume."

"I don't know if you know this, but Nagase considers you her closest friend."

That stopped me. All the anger I was feeling by then suddenly didn't have direction to flow into, almost like some magic words. I was trying to purge of uncertainly but it all came back in spades at that moment.

"I'm sorry that we haven't gotten to know each other better Blaze. I know I'm poking my nose into things I shouldn't, but it's what I do. I'm just trying to get the whole story. I'm not trying to judge you. Not even close."

I knew he was right. I knew I shouldn't' take offense. I knew everything he did was sincere and with the best possible intentions. But I still couldn't shake the toxic feeling the question gave me. It was fear. Though I was called fearless, the truth is that I was ripe with stuff. I was afraid of my past, afraid of myself, and most of all afraid of finding out the truth. But what else could I say to him? There was nothing else.

So I turned around slowly.

"Yeah, I know. What do you think with all the things we've been through? I owe Nagase everything, my life and a lot more than that. I probably wouldn't have become a pilot if it wasn't for her. She's my wingman, my partner. So yeah we're close. And I'm got going to let her freeze out there alone."

We're close.

So what was going through my mind as I was flying toward Glubina? The answer is not much. I, we wanted to get her out of there, and that's all really there is say about that.

So there we were at two thousand feet, ingressing at mach 1.5. What an adventure this was going to be.

"Everyone check their HUD. The EMR beacon should start display in moment," I said. It was little more than a metal detector in terms of information it gave us but it was we got. Sure enough as soon we crossed into the projected zone, it became to receive the electronic 'tics' of the signal. "There! Everyone got it?"

"Yes Captain."

"I'm getting it loud and clear kid. Let's go find her."

"Alright. Mark me, vector 302. Let's hit the throttle."

It was quiet for few minutes but we knew that wasn't going to last for long. The airspace was buzzing with enemy planes. They were looking for her too.

"Captain we got enemy planes incoming, twelve-o-clock on the nose," Grimm reported.

"And I was hoping for nice quiet ride too," Chopper commented.

"We don't have time to play around. Arm XMAA, just fire and forget," I said, confirming them on the IFF.

"I got them Captain." Grimm broke off, going head on at them. "Archer fox one, fox one."

The missiles broke away. The pilots much have caught completely by surprise because both missiles hit.

"Alright I got 'em!" Grimm exclaimed.

"Nice shooting Grimm, bagging the first two kills of the day," Chopper said.

"No time to celebrate, let's go in low. Keep your eyes peeled for Nagase."

It was low and fast. The rolling mountainous landscape was really something to see in the morning sun. I guess it really suited the moment, brilliant light after the cold darkness. It was something to write a poem about. The signal began to pulse fast with the pitch going higher we were getting closer, but so was the enemy. More and more aircraft we showing up on radar, this might get messy.

"Sea Goblin, you still reading us?"

"Data link is perfect Wardog, we reading the signal loud and clear. Looks like you're getting closer to the princess."

"Ha, hey kid, you think Nagase you think Nagase will take to being called 'princess', by everyone at the base?"

"I wouldn't think so but you're welcome to try Chopper."

"Ah Captain, we have more planes coming in on our six," Grimm warned me.

"I see them. It's going to make things complicated in a little while. Just a the throttle up, let's find Nagase first."

"Roger that kid. She should be around her somewhere., we're almost at the threshold for the distress signal."

"Alright Sea Goblin…" I said trying to raise them.

There was a muffled response but nothing audible. "What?"

"Captain I'm losing Nagase's signal! It's just…"

"No," it was happening to me too. The pitched jumped around and then just went silent. It wasn't hard to figure out what was happening. "Dammit everyone ECCM!" I activated the built in counter measures.

"Chopper, Grimm you read me?" I looked back into their cockpits, motioning with my hands.

"Yeah kid, but I've completely lost the signal. Grimm too…wait look ahead."

I did, and could just barely make out the E-767.

"That's a jammer craft!" Chopper said.

"It's being jammed!"

"Roger. Turning to engage." That fact that there was an E-767 here meant it had escorts close by. The whole situation was turning into one giant fur ball. It also meant that they were following the signal as well. I locked with the XMAA and fired. It hit the E-767 in the rear fuselage. No more jamming. It took a moment but the regular pings of the EMR beacon returned.

"Grimm, Chopper check your HUD it should be coming in now."

"I got it kid. She's somewhere around here."

"Captain those fighters are almost on us. Vectors 172 to 090. They're coming fast," Grimm stated.

"Great," I was getting a bit nervous. There were at least six aircraft incoming. It wouldn't be easy to take on al of them normally. But we had to get control of the airspace. It wasn't just fighters either, enemy helicopters were closing on her. They would make problems for Sea Goblin too. None of that could be done though till we found her. "We'll just have to keep an air on our six. Make sure we don't we get any missiles on us from long range Grimm."

"Roger Captain. I got lookout."

He sounded confident, which heartened me up a little bit as well. "Okay, vectors 300 to 320. You guys take right. I'll take left."

"Copy Blaze, let's keep a close eye on the ground people," Chopper shouted.

They pulled off from my right, arcing sharp contrails against the pale morning sky till they were just out of sight. They weren't more than a moment away and the Yukes were closing in on my position, but even still I suddenly felt very alone then. Nothing but me in the air, no sounds of gunfire or missile strikes, no chatter over the radio, only the hum the engines and the white blanket expanding without end. And no Nagase…

The loneliness was palatable that I was starting to feel poetic, like I used to feel spending days to myself before I joined the Air Defense Force. Part of me wished that I had note pad to write down scale ideas. Maybe a mixed phyrigian and aeolian modes to make a morn-full solo, adding some tension with dominant tones to capture the mood. I did miss it somewhat. I hardly played at all anymore, skipping days at a time sometimes. Thinking about it sometimes, I put myself in a bad mood. But, I think what I gained by flying was much sweeter than the creative edge of depression.

I kept the throttle at low as I could. While I needed to go fast if I missed her, it might mean her capture, or even worse. If that hadn't happened already. The signal pitch was already at the threshold. She was close, but she still could be few miles away.

Just where? From the sky, even in slow moving aircraft at low altitude, it's extremely difficult, even in ideal conditions, i.e. a flat basin with little brush. This was a mountain-scape with thick coniferous forests, and I was in a fighter jet. It would be difficult to even find the large crash site of the gunship, much less a person. So for the first time in a long time I found myself praying, not to God, but to Fate, to the lords of chance, to the laws of physics, to anything that might even the odds.

I had a contact on the IFF then, low flying, moving slowly. It was definitely a chopper, probably a gunship, AH-64 or maybe an AH-1 attack type. And it wasn't definitely going for the same signal I was.

I pushed up the throttle and flew in lower under 500 feet. It's pretty dangerous flying but the situation warranted it, even though I was almost flying through the mountains. I fired up the XMAA and started tracking. I saw the point-like flying close to a mountain ridge and got the lock.

I pulled my F-18 up back to 1500 feet and angled to get a visual on the chopper just as the missile hit. One easy kill, and hopefully Nagase wasn't anywhere near the explosion.

"C'mon." I lowered back down to bellow five hundred feet. The signal pitch was enough to barely audible was the frequency was so high to almost indiscernible. "I know you're right around here Kei. Shoot a flare or something…"

The enemy fighters were much closer and now in side the Sea Goblin's path. There wasn't much time. But as it turns out I didn't have to wait much longer.

"Blaze!" I was startled to say the least. It was low but very audible, and it was her voice.

"Nagase?" I immediately changed vector back toward the destroyed gunship, and right in clearing, in the blinding white of the snow she was standing.

"Grimm, Chopper. Get over here! I've found her!"

"You did? Seriously kid?"

"Alright Captain, we're on our way!"

I'll admit I had the urge to be jubilant too, but the mission still wasn't over. "Nagase Sea Goblin is inbound. Vector 102. Just stay there. They'll pick you up."

"Negative, the area's too hot. Moving vector…099 for pick up. I have some friends I have to meet," she said and I had no idea what she meant. I was going to say no, but my instinct suddenly told me to trust her.

"Copy. We'll take this airspace. You just stay alive."

"Yeah."

Yuke forces must have been close to her. That was the only reason I could think of for why she was still running. Which meant we were more out of time than I had thought. I changed vector flying over the path she was going to take. It was time to call in the cavalry.

"Wardog one to Sea Goblin. We found her. Mark my position for pick up."

"Sea Goblin. Roger that Wardog. Good job. You got good eyes. Commencing 'Princess Rescue.'"

"You just made that up that now didn't you?" Chopper accused.

"Well not just now. We're 20 miles away. You guys just keep those fighters busy," Sea Goblin replied.

I thought it was a bit cute personally. It seemed somewhat appropriate for the situation. Chopper and Grimm made it to my position passing over me top side.

"Where is she kid? It's hard to see anything from up here," Chopper said.

"Never mind that. Those fighters are here," Grimm chided. He was right we several bogeys right in Sea Goblins flight path to intercept, more we're coming to engage us.

"Alright, let's clear a path. Splash all hostile aircraft. Make sure nothing happens to Sea Goblin," I ordered.

"Let's go get 'me. Cover my six Grimm," Chopper acknowledged.

I raised altitude, arming the XMAA. I had four left, plus two sidewinders on the wings, and a full gun cartridge, more than enough to make me comfortable. I had two coming head, and my warning alarm warned that they were targeting me. I pushed the throttle up, and angled down to pass bellow them. The passed over me and then pulled felt to come in on my tail. I pulled out and revered course, getting them square in my sights. "Fox one." The angle on the shot was bad though and I missed. So pushed up the throttle again, arming my guns and scraped him as he flew by my nose.

"Gotcha."

I pulled a hard left and got a missile lock on the wingman and fired a sidewinder. That one hit.

"Nice shooting kid, but we got a few more coming," Chopper pointed out. There were there of them on the IFF, they weren't going after us though.

"They're heading toward Sea Goblin. Form up on me, we're going to intercept."

We pushed max throttle, coming in behind them as fast as possible. For me though it wasn't fast enough, and I began to fret, "Sea Goblin heads up, you have bandits inbound. Keep your altitude as low as possible."

"Copy Wardog. We'll keep it low and fast."

"Don't do anything reckless," Chopper warned. "You'll get shot down yourselves."

"We'll just have to trust you if that happens," Sea goblin responded.

"No one's getting shot down," I stated. If anyone did, the operation would likely fail. I could see the contrails, and the Yuke fighters. Time to fight. "We're coming on them. Tally-ho."

"I see them. They're gunning for that helicopter," Grimm explained.

"We're almost in range. Just keep them in your sights Grimm. They're going to get there," I reassured

"Kid two of them is breaking off. They're coming at us."

They were trying to by time for the lead to take out Sea Goblin. They knew exactly what were planning. I guess I should give the Yukes more credit. Chopper was the only one in position to take those two out though.

"Chopper can you take the shot?" I asked. He banked right to get on their tale, but he was too far behind.

"Ash! No good kid. I can't get the shot!"

"Alright stay on the leader. I'll keep these guys busy."

"You're going to go two on one again Blaze? I new you would go a bit insane on this mission," Chopper joked.

"Just worry about your own marbles Chopper. I'm fine. Keep that helicopter safe."

I banked right, turning around about the same vector the two Flankers did. The IFF showed them to almost right in front but I couldn't see them at first. My warning alarm went on, and then I saw the two fighters coming in on my right flank. "Flanked by Flankers." I boosted the throttle, trying to come in behind them as the lead one fired a missile. Lucky enough for me though, the missile had a terrible angle, and it missed. They right to try and follow me, but I already was almost on their tail. I locked on the XMAA on both of them and fired, sending one of them to the ground in a ball of flames. The other turned hard to evade, the missile hit his wing leaving a trail of smoke. He had the good sense to disengage.

"Alright," I said to myself, vectoring toward Sea Goblin. I exhaled deeply when saw they were undamaged, while three fighters circled in the airspace above. "Chopper what's going on?"

"We're engaged with him kid. Don't worry I'm not letting him near that helicopter! I almost got him! Fox 2!" Chopper yelled. I saw the blazing red trail of the missile launch and strike into the Yuke fighter and it spiraled out of the sky.

"Kill confirmed, Nice shot Chopper," I applauded. Now we could get back to her. Bring her back home. But we still didn't have much time.

"The airspace is securing now Captain." Grimm said. "Sea Goblin you have a clear route."

"It's not going to be for long. The enemy is converging on this area. Keep an eye on your IFF, we'll probably have more fighters will be incoming soon," I warned.

"You're just bright ray of sunshine Blaze," Chopper joked with a sigh. "Sea Goblin get moving!"

"Calm down, we're going to the scene as fast as we can," a somewhat indignant voice replied. "12 miles."

"Can't you guys go any faster?"

I felt the same way, but we needed to be on guard. "Enough of that Chopper we need to be alert."

"Yeah you're telling me kid."

"Captain I got something on the IFF," I heard Grimm say. I had hoped we'd get a few more minutes. "They enemy choppers, coming in behind Sea Goblin."

"Sea Goblin can you see them?" I asked.

"Affirmative, they're flying low, just above the trees. They're getting ready to target us."

No they wouldn't. "I'll take care of them." The chopper was barely on the IFF. My guess he had been flying low in the dips of the hills till her could get a good position on Sea Goblin. I had one XMAA might as well use it. I got and fired, and another AH-64 went down.

Sea Goblin was also having trouble. "We got enemies ahead of us. Kobold take care of them." Kobold was their armed escort. We had the airspace but the enemy still had a of power on the ground. And we weren't equipped for to help. Nagase was on her own.

"Hey!" Chopper suddenly yelled. "I see her!"

"What?" Grimm wondered. "Where is she?"

"She's in a clearing. Looks like she has a whole platoon chasing her. I'm going to do."

What? Not what I'm thinking?

"What? Chopper do not open fire on the ground!" I told him, but I got the sense he wasn't hearing me.

"Relax kid. I know what I'm doing."

"Chopper! You might just kill her!" I looked ahead. I saw him fly in but I was still too far away to make anything out. He was going to do it!

His plane pulled up and I was screaming at him over the radio.

"She's fine kid. I have a visual. I just bought her some time." He said as he formed up beside me.

"Next time you follow my orders!"

"Don't worry kid. Sea Goblin hurry up guys, what are you gonna do if the enemy catches her?"

The other helicopter responded this time. "This is Sea Goblin. We're six miles away. We're going as fast we can."

I scanned the IFF then, four more enemy fighters were incoming, and I only had one missile left. "Chopper, Grimm check your IFF. There's another formation inbound."

"I got them Captain. They'll be here in few minutes," Grimm said, I could hear the trepidation in his voice.

"Let's hope the rescue gets done before they get here," Chopper said.

"We're going to fly to intercept. Keep them busy."

I sort of felt like I was in some sports game while we changed vector and flew north to meet the Yuke squadron. W were ahead, trying to run the score board down before the other team could score any points. The only good part was that Sea Goblin was almost there. We only needed a little bit of time. We knew we were going to win this game.

"So this Captain Nagase is she a looker?" One of the Sea Goblin asked out of the blue. No I didn't really feel jealousy. Really, I mean it.

"Why don't you rescue her and see for yourself?" Chopper responded.

"If she's hot, I'm asking her out," the pilot said.

"Well, then you can find out how tough her guard is too. C'mon, just hurry up will ya? Please."

We were almost within visual range of these guys. They spread they're formation out in case we fired on them from long range. Smart.

Two miles away, that was hardly anything.

"I see them Captain, they're almost in range," Grimm said.

Sea Goblin radioed that they spotted Nagase.

"They're tracking me. I've been spiked!" Chopper said.

"Alright engage! Engage!" I shouted.

I could almost see the helicopters land picking her up safely.

I fired my last sidewinder, hitting him in his wing. Spash one!

"This is Sea Goblin! Wardog we got her. Repeat we got her, and she's not alone either. We're moving in!" I didn't really hear the last part that well. Grimm had Chopper had shot down the other aircraft, and I had never felt such relief in gaining air superiority.

"Rescue team dropping from helicopter. I was really worried there for awhile," Grimm said.

"You got towel Blaze? I need to wipe all this sweat off my brow," Chopper told me.

"Yeah. Let me roll down the window the window and hand it to you," I told him. It seemed like it had been awhile since I told a joke.

"Yeah. Say, Blaze I think that song would be perfect for time like this you know?"

I a feeling he was talking about that same song he had given months before. I don't think I ever actually listened to it. But I didn't care "Sure, why not? I always wanted to have soundtrack to my life." I wasn't a great joke, not as good as the last one at least, I know, but since when was I the funny guy?

"Yeah Kid, I know the feeling. Aw man I can't wait to see the looked on her face when we get her out of there."

"She's probably exhausted Captain Chopper. Maybe we should give her a break?" Grimm said.

"Grimm, you really need to stop killing the moment you know? C'mon reveal in the excitement will ya. We just saved Nagase from the enemy. I don't what that Base Commander has for us, I'm celebrating tonight." Chopper retorted.

"We barely slept last night," Grimm replied.

"No, we didn't sleep last night," Chopper corrected. "And we're definitely not going to sleep tonight."

"That depends," I said.

"Depends on what kid?" Chopper asked.

"Well on how much alcohol we all consume tonight," I made sure to make sound a banal as possible.

Chopper at least got a good kick out of it. "Glad, you're at least in high spirits kid."

"Yeah, my head's in the clouds." It sort of was, really. They both got a kick out of that.

Sea Goblin suddenly radioed in, "Sea Goblin to Wardog leader."

"This is Wardog, go ahead Sea Goblin," I responded.

"We got a message for you guys from a new crew member."

It obvious who they meant by that. We all became dead silent immediately as she went on the radio. "Hey guys."

"Nagase," we all said in one manner or another, probably sounded like a bunch of static to her though. "You alright?" I asked.

She was breathing heavily into the microphone. From the sound, it seemed as though she was beyond exhaustion, but she still played it down. "I'm fine, just a little tired."

"Us too. Didn't sleep to well last night."

"Same here," there were traces of laughter, but on the whole her voice had a sense of relief that made me want to cry for some reason. I can't imagine what her night was like.

"Thanks," she said after a moment. "Thanks Blaze—Chopper—Grimm. Thanks for coming after me."

"Anytime Nagase," Chopper said. "You just take it easy."

"I'll see you when we get back," I said, and that was the end of the conversation.

With the weight of the day off our shoulders and Nagase safely inbound for home, the refuel and the flight back was quick. Nagase would be several hours behind us, not landing till early the next day at Sand Island, but that was hardly a long wait. Though the rest of the base couldn't take a break, our hangar turned into an impromptu party house with the just the three of us. Even the base commander showed some satisfaction at the success.

As for me, I was in a quasi-state between euphoria and impatience. I found myself pacing around the halls for awhile just thinking over the rescue over and over again. What could've gone wrong, what went right, where I should've shown more discretion and where I should've shown more initiative; I thought about it all even though it was really pointless. I still thought about POW rescue and how she was shot down in the first place. Even in the face of rescuing her I couldn't really give myself a break for letting it happen in the first place. I was the same as Nagase, laying the blame squarely on my own shoulders even though I knew better.

At some point I found myself in my quarters. The exhaustion we had accrued over the previous missions was by that point overwhelming. I wanted to stay awake for Nagase, but I figured she herself was probably enjoying some needed sleep. And we should too. As it turned out Chopper and Grimm had already hit the sack not long after we had landed. I just didn't notice.

Before I did though I went into the hangar, looking at the empty spot where Nagase's plane had been next to mine. I was half hoping to run into Pops, and I wasn't disappointed. He was there, maintaining the planes long past his own shift.

"Shouldn't you be relaxing?" he chastised me, not even turning around.

"Shouldn't you?" I retorted.

"Unlike you flyboys, I manage to get decent sleep. Nine hours a night. When's the last time you got more than six Blaze?"

I leaned back against my F-18. "Awhile."

"That's right. So take it when you can get it. Alright Captain?"

He put an odd emphasis on the 'captain,' that seemed imply a great amount of duty. It made me laugh.

"Understood sir. I honestly don't really think I deserve to be called. I've been a pilot for few months," I said.

"Quality over quantity. You've had a hell-of-a three months." He turned to face me.

"Still make mistakes though."

"And you always will. Nagase was shot down Blaze, but it wasn't your fault. And whatever you're thinking right now, there's nothing you could've done to have stopped it."

"No there was. I allowed her fly at that low altitude. I should've thought about the danger. I know better," I lamented.

"There's always going to be danger, even when you have complete air supremacy. Trust me. I've flown enough to see just about everyway you can get shot down. You're an incredible pilot Blaze, and a top notch squad captain."

"Thanks. But I wasn't able to keep Nagase from being shot down."

"True, but she survived. And you went in and got her back. Being an ace is also being able to correct mistakes before they turn into disasters," he smiled widely at me, while some grease off his hands. "And you did just that."

"Yeah, but we got lucky."

"Luck is good. Like sleep, take it any day you can kid. Sometimes, especially in a war, luck is your only salvation." He tossed the rag to me as he walked out of the hangar.

"I'll keep that in mind," I called after him.

"Good. Now go get some sleep."

_Luck is good_. I certainly couldn't argue with that. Reflecting, I sort of wondered how much of our success had been purely luck. It was just luck that I had or Chopper hadn't been in the air that day, when the Yukes attacked our training squad on Sand Island. Nagase was only one to survive out of all of them. It had been a few months but I couldn't recall any of their faces, even most of their names were hazy. I hadn't known them for that long after all. But still the thought was somewhat unsettling.

Maybe it had only been luck that I had survived and not one of them? Nagase though, every time she's been put at risk she has survived, first the training battle and now surviving being shot down behind enemy lines. It's hard to believe her skill didn't have anything to do with that. As for me, lucky has never been the first word I've used o describe myself, and I can guess that it's the same with Chopper and with Grimm. Maybe the luck is in that we all ended up in the squadron together, the rest just follows naturally like a law of physics.

All the thought weighed down on me as I wandered back to my quarters, further reminding me of my exhaustion. Pops was right about things, and this was one of them: I should take as much sleep as possible, whenever possible, the Razgriz, and my other demons be damned.

I looked at the bottom of the empty top bunk. It was still in the middle of the night, and I had just woken up. It occurred to me though that since I was a Captain I should be able to lobby for more spacious quarters. There was still plenty of room at the base. No new squadrons had come in yet. At the very least I should be able to get something with just a single bed. It was just a passing thought though. Even though I was a Captain, the answer probably would still be no. I already have one to myself anyway.

I knew I had not been asleep that long, and laid there wondering whether it was the stress or just my circadian rhythms that woke me up, but I felt very rested for some reason.

I looked at the clock to confirm my suspicion that I had only been asleep for little over five hours. Nagase should already be on the base, at least if they kept to planned schedule. It was always possible they decided to drop her at a front line base before putting her on plane back to Sand Island. But I had feeling Nagase would insist on coming back as soon as possible. I decided I had plenty of time to sleep, and sat up to get ready.

Ironically, just then there was a knock on my door. "Yeah," I said groggily.

"Captain, it's Dodge. Sorry to wake you but I thought you might want to know that Captain Nagase just arrived on base."

I immediately pulled myself out of my bed, putting on my class B uniform and walked toward infirmary. Even if Nagase hadn't suffered any obvious injury, they would still put her in the ER for exhaustion. That meant that she would be immediately ordered to the infirmary. Knowing Nagase, and how she generally felt about the CMO (really how we all felt about the CMO) she would protest the entire thing.

So I made my way down there, walking down almost ghostly halls that led to the infirmary, or the medical ward. It felt alien since I hadn't been there in awhile. I was always one of those persons who made every possible excuse not to go the doctor. Luckily enough for me, I never really had to for most of life. Hospitals I especially found noxious. Not that I have ever been into a poorly kept hospital, but being in one just brought a bad feeling…and images of all those bloody needles they had pulled out of my arm that time. So no, I didn't like hospitals, infirmaries or analogous places thereof.

Still, I wanted to see Nagase. The odd creepiness was enough to bear when there was a friend in need, right? As I got closer I passed a few of the nurses, exchanging terse greetings. Gradually the atmosphere started to get more lifelike. Then I was in the waiting area, which was pretty deserted. But as always there was at least one person on duty even in the early hours of the morning.

"Hi," I said, surprising her a little bit.

"Uh—morning sir. What I can do for you?"

"I just wanted to ask if Captain Nagase was in here."

"Captain Nagase? I think so but—hold on," she began to look up something on the computer in front of her.

Before she had any time to do anything someone called out from down one of the hall ways. "Yes sir is."

I recognized the voice immediately. The Chief Medial Officer, he had the reputation for being a bit of an asshole. And he sort of was.

"We usually restrict visiting hours to more decent times of day. Shouldn't you be getting some sleep Captain?" he asked me.

"I'm fine sir. If it's not too much of a bother, I would like to see her," I asked, making a big effort to keep my tone civil.

"Oh? Are you asking me to circumvent procedure—Captain?"

"No sir, just a small exception."

"You want me to do you a favor?"

"Please." It was definitely the first time I had ever said that to him.

For a moment I was almost sure he would turn me away. He always seemed to get a kick out of using his authority to annoy people. But then again I didn't really know him that well.

"Okay, but only if she wants to see you," he almost sassed at me. "Second door to your left, this way. Knock first, the nurse in there should answer."

"Thank you sir." I said, and quickly brushed passed him down the corridor he specified. Life's full of surprises, that's certainly true.

I knocked on the glass door, and just as he said a nurse came and poked her face through the crack. She gave me a very odd look, no doubt wondering what I was doing there at that time in the morning.

"Yes sir?"

"I'm her to see Captain Nagase. Please," I added, it had worked for me so far.

"Uh—Captain it's early. You should probably come back at another time. She's exhausted."

"Can you ask her please?"

She breathed in heavily and then reluctant walked away. It took her about half a minute before she came back. "She'll see you."

From what I remembered the rooms were pretty large, but I hadn't been in there enough to realize how large. There four beds just in one room, and there was another glass door at the other end. The lights were pretty low, giving me a foreboding sense when I first walked in. But that quickly dissipated once I saw Nagase pushing herself up from her bed.

There are some moments that are jus awkward. This was one of them. For all my motivation to come and talk to her, walking over there I found myself completely without any words. I felt like I had this great thing to convey, something really profound, but I wasn't really sure of what it was. So I found myself walking over there with my heart racing hoping she wouldn't judge me too harshly.

"Hey." That was the greeting I managed to get out of my mouth.

"Hey," she responded a little groggily. She did sound like she was happy to see me though. In the dim light of the room I could barely see her eyes.

"How ya feeling?" I asked. Though the question really was one of desperation.

"I'm fine," she pushed up into a full sitting position, draping her bare legs over the edge of the bed. "I've never been so tired though." She then laughed a bit and said, "It was kind of a long day."

I gave away an awkward smile then. I was then truly tongue tied. She was still able to look on the brighter side. Somehow I had thought she might have lost that over her experience. I don't think I ever really had that sort of perspective.

"Nagase, I'm sorry we had to leave you there." I had to look at floor as I said it. I felt a mix of shame and fear, shame for what had happened, and fear for what she would say. She didn't say anything immediately. I looked up and caught her eyes for a moment and then suddenly had the urge to explain. "When the gunship crashed…we didn't have any…"

"I know," she spoke over me. "It's okay." I looked up then, and for a moment we starred at each other, before she looked down. "I know what happened Blaze. It's not your fault."

Not my fault, I was only able to appreciate those words at an intellectual level.

"It's okay Blaze," she repeated. "I was the one who was reckless. It's no one's fault but my own. Just like the Captain said to me once: the way I fly I'm going to die real soon. And I almost did."

Her voice had an immense sadness that only seemed more potent with her fatigue. I had visceral desire to contradict her, but I found it difficult to think up anything convincing, even to myself.

"I won't let you die," I said after a short moment.

She gave me a half smile then. "That's supposed to be my job. I'm your wingman."

I returned it as best I could. "Well then you better not get shot down again," I said trying to sound a little lighter.

Nagase actually laughed a little bit. "You can bet on that. I really hate snow by the way."

"Yeah, I'll bet." We both enjoyed a short laugh then.

"I was just eager," Nagase continued. "I really thought he would be there. I was sure of it."

"I was hoping for it too. We all were."

"I was stupid about it though."

"You were stupid. You weren't careless either." That at least I believed to true.

Nagase gave me an intense look, then gave a shallow nod. "You think he's still alive?" she asked me.

I didn't need to think long about that question. "Yeah. Knowing him, probably escaped a long time ago." I could honestly see it in my mind, an image of him commandeering a Yuke fighter and flying away. Though even if he did escape, that was a bit unlikely. "Do you?"

"Yeah," she chuckled a bit as she said it, but that small glimmer of joy quickly dissipated. It was replaced with such a looked a regret that I almost didn't need her to tell me what was on her mind. "Blaze I…" her voice crocked. She the covered her mouth in an effort hold back what was definitely the beginning of some tears.

"Kei you don't have to tell me if you don't…" I began trying to assuage her.

"No. I'm just tired." She took breath. "Yesterday…I mean the night before the last mission. You remember I told you that I was having strange dreams?" she asked me.

It seemed a lifetime ago, but I remembered. It was at the party the base had thrown for use after we has sank the Hrimfaxi. "Yeah."

"I had a bad one that night. I woke up sweating. I made enough noise to even alert security officer." She seemed far away as she speaking to me. The dark circles under her eyes made it look like she was reliving the dream right then, right there.

"What was it about?" I asked cautiously. I almost didn't want to know from the expression on her face.

She looked down, brushing some her disordered hair from her eyes. "Snow and demons."

"I don't think that was dream Nagase," I joked.

"Yeah, I know."

The guilt I had felt at that moment was gone at that point. The fact that she would life at that dry humor, told me she was okay. It wasn't enough that she wasn't physically harmed in incident. Not for me.

I stood but about to leave, thinking of making up something about something I had to do, somewhere on the base. Before I could get anything out of my mouth though she stopped me.

"Blaze!"

"Yeah." I sat back down.

The looked in her eyes had changed though. She hand something on her mind that she really wanted to tell me. "The Yuke soldiers, they know about us. That we sunk the Hrimfaxi."

"Yeah. I thought so."

"They have a name for us. They call us the Demons of Razgriz."

I was a bit surprised. It made sense of course, but…Razgriz. That name just seems to powerful to giver to a group of fighter pilots. I couldn't help the smile. It seemed like someone had just gave me the most flattering compliment in the world. "Really?"

She nodded, not able to hold back her own smile. And for a wonderfully carefree moment, the two of us just laughed in the dim light of the medical ward.

"Demon's of the shadow's huh?" I mused. "It's a good name for a fighter squadron."

"I think the Captain, would've liked it," Nagase commented.

"He would've loved it. It's pompous, grandiose, terrifying, exactly like he is."

"You think Chopper will get a kick out of it?" she asked.

I could hardly belief she would really need to ask me that question. She must be kidding. "I don't even think about all the crap he is going to dish out once he hears about this."

She was laughing a lot harder then. "Yeah!"

"The four wings of the Razgriz. Even so we both need to get some sleep."

"You're telling me. I've been awake for awhile now."

"I'll leave you alone. You got the day off tomorrow, in case you are wondering," I said beginning to exit. I didn't really know that, but there was no way I was going to let her get stuck in any remedial duty that day. She have a last small laugh, and closed her eyes.

It was about this time of the War that I was starting to get a better understanding of things. Not only combat, but of myself. The huge hole that I always felt was there began to lessen.

Still, I had no idea of what was yet to come.


	24. Desert Arrow

A/N: So here's the long awaited Jilachi desert battle. It took awhile. I hope to get at least one chapter a month out. Then it should only take me a year to finish this story…...please review.

-Stonehenge

Fire

There was little good news following Nagase's return.

That's not to say we at Sand Island were not happy about it. All of us in the squadron and even anyone involved in the squadron counted ourselves lucky. An unofficial word came down from High Command that in 'honor of our meritorious service' we were promised to be given the next two weeks off. We weren't really off of course. All that meant was that they weren't going to send us on any more crazy missions for the time being. I get the sense that the Air Defense Force was trying to use our specter as a way to gain a tactical edge, the threat of we, the Demons of Razgriz. I couldn't help but wonder then what the great generals at the top thought about us when they learned about that moniker. Would some still see us as potential risks, or would they actually have pride? Who's to know? We hardly cared anymore. As long as we survived, I could count that as a victory no matter the tactical outcome.

That wasn't the case for the War as a whole though. The momentum gained from the destruction of the Hrimfaxi allowed the Osean Army to storm through the eastern countryside of Yuktobania. If you watched the news it seemed like city after city was falling to Howell's charge. And watching the news ended up being a lot of what we did during that brief time off.

It was still nice though. Mostly we were in the crew rec. room. The very small crew rec. room, but since there weren't that many crew for the squadrons anyway it was never that crowded. I don't know where on Sand Island Chopper found it, or how he was able to sneak it into the room, but were once was just an empty floor there was now a pool table, a very shitty pool table. There were stains all over the fabric. The legs weren't even so he stuffed plywood under one so it was even. It was one of those kinds of table that, instead of pockets, it had plastic tubes that would corral the balls into a big cavity on the side. That would have been fine except most of the tubes were broken or just missing. After a few crushed toes Nagase and Grimm ended up fixing the problem with a lot duck-tape. In short, it was table that was dirt cheap when it was new, and now was just a big eyesore. We wouldn't have had it any other way.

To this day though, I'm clueless to where he got the balls and sticks for it.

I played a little bit of pool, but I still was pretty bad at the game. If the shot was longer than 3 feet I was just about guaranteed to miss. Nagase was even worse than I was. Grimm was a lot better, his parents apparently used to own a table. And who would have guessed that Chopper had a fair amount of skill at it right? Of course he always wanted to put money on the games too.

Mostly it was Chopper and Grimm that played pool along with any other crew members that happened to be in the room. I mostly just divided my attention between them playing and what was on the TV.

That or I would do some practicing guitar. It had been such a long time since I had played my nylon string it almost felt alien to me, and most of the tricks I had picked up awhile ago were likewise rusty. I had gotten into a shredding flamenco guitarist few years back. Ended up spending a lot time practicing some rumba strumming patterns. It was hard though, and just when I was starting to improve, the free time I had from flying suddenly went way down. I remembered them well enough to practice though.

Nagase did sort of the same thing, except she was more into reading newspapers (they were always days old) or writing something. It was the first time I noticed how long she could sit still and work through a book. No wonder she had top grades back in the academy.

The TV itself didn't have many channels. Most bases would have satellite television for personnel to use when off duty, not Sand Island. We did have a TV at least, but most of the stations mysteriously didn't work, and those that did only worked when the weather was clear. So network news broadcasts were just only thing we got at the base. Which was okay, since the news was pretty much the only thing worth watching anyway.

So that's what we did. Wasted our time and hoped the War might be over by the next time we would have to sortie. At least I did.

One afternoon, we were all there. Chopper was playing a game with Grimm and Pops. Nagase and I were sitting hardly paying attention to either the game the news. The coverage seemed to be about the Army's advance through the Sonza plains, towards the Jilachi desert. There would be a reporter standing on some undetermined street corner as transport after transport drove through the background.

"The Osean Army under the command of General Howell continues its break-neck advance on the Yuktobanian Capital of Cinigrad. Throughout they are meeting very little resistance, as the Yuktobanian Army has pulled back its forces in an attempt to shield themselves from Osean airstrikes."

"Who do think is responsible for that?" Chopper commented as Pops was taking his shot, he was stripes and sank the nine-ball in one of the corners, and then moved onto to the fourteen.

"You know there are other pilots in the Air Force besides us," I retorted.

"Without those submarines our forces are on equal terms with theirs," Nagase said, closing her book and looking up. "Before it wouldn't have been possible to perform airstrikes in that far."

"That's what I meant," Chopper explained. "After all that you think maybe we might a mention at least. Where is Genette anyway?"

"Maybe the military just doesn't want us to have any more attention?" Grimm offered as an explanation.

"The top brass wants the focus of media to be on the army as a whole. That's why you're not named specifically. It also protects you from being specifically targeted by the enemy," Pops said as he was lining up his third shot in a row.

"They already call us the Demons of Razgriz," Nagase chimed in. "Don't you think they already know our squadron's real name and number?"

"Probably." Pops took the shot, landing it.

Chopper watched him take it. "Really?" I heard Chopper groan, and looked up to see him glaring at Pops, who just winked.

"It also works to our advantage though," I stated, looking at Nagase to see was thinking the same thing.

She nodded, "In the minds of the Yukes we've become more than just fighter pilots." She reopened her book. It looked like she was concentrating even harder than before.

"I have hard time believing that entire Yuktobanian army could think that though," Grimm was speaking. "It's just an old fairy tale after all."

"Grimm!" Chopper shouted, from behind him, startling him. "It's your shot."

"None of them really need to believe it wholeheartedly Grimm," Pops said walking over behind the coach. He stood just above Nagase, looking down at the two of us. "All they need to know is that you have a name. Not just a squadron name, but a name earned in the battlefield." He turned around, looking at Grimm and Chopper, then back to Nagase and myself. "There have been a lot of aces in every war since the beginning of the previous century, but only a very few get names like the Demons of Razgriz. All the Yuke pilots have to know is that you four are good enough to earn a name like that. And that's enough to make them afraid." I have to give a hand to Pops. He never missed an opportunity to give us a short soliloquy about flying, combat or otherwise.

"You sound like someone who's had experience with this," Nagase replied with a faint hint of a question.

"Yeah. C'mon Pops when are you going to wow us with some old war stories about you and the Captain. Huh?" Chopper teased.

"When you," Pops pointed to Chopper, "actually perform a take-off correctly. And when you can beat me at this game. Is it my shot yet?" Grimm hadn't even taken his shot yet. I thought they should give up right then though. Pops had already sank six on his own against a mere three between Chopper and Grimm together. It would take an act of god for Chopper and Grimm to pull that out to a draw. Or, the arrival of one of our commanding officers. The latter one was the one that happened.

An aide from Perrault's office came in then. I could never remember his name. He never seemed to leave his desk. "Excuse me Captain," he said, clearly addressing me.

"Yeah?"

"Colonel Perrault wanted to let you know that there is a briefing tomorrow morning at 0530," he replied.

Chopper groaned. "Well there's the end of my good day. What happened to our two weeks off?"

"I'm sorry I don't know what you're referring to sir," the aide responded. Of course he didn't. My hunch is that whoever passed that word down didn't know what they were talking about.

"We'll be there. Thank you," I dismissed him and he marched back to his office.

"I wonder what it's about," Grimm commented.

"We're being deployed to Yuktobania," Chopper replied. "What else could it be?"

"Yeah but…I thought maybe because we're so far inland that they'd be willing to negotiate by now. Right?" Grimm clarified.

"No," Nagase said. "The hardliners have taken control of the Yuktobanian government. They think as long as they can keep us out, they can still win the War. They won't stop until we've taken Cinigrad."

"If that's right," I added, "I wouldn't be surprised if we're sent flying into the capital tomorrow."

"Well that's a cheerful thought kid. One more odds-defying-mission for the Razgriz. Dammit, I'm wishing that those peace talks a month ago talks actually worked right now," Choppers stated. We all in one way or another voiced our agreement with Chopper.

"The four of you need to stop complaining like this," Pops chastised us. "You're fighter pilots not politicians. Last thing you need is something else to distract you." He specifically looked at Nagase, who just looked down at her book.

"I'm not complaining. I'm…" Chopper then gave a big sigh and fell backwards onto the pool table. "Alright I'm complaining. Man I swear."

"Okay. Now unlike you aces," Pops looked around at the four of us. "I actually have some work to do." He hung up the pool-stick he was holding and left the room.

"Guess that's the end of the game," Grimm said right after Pops had left.

"It's not like we were winning Grimm. And he said he hadn't played in a long time. Ha!" Chopper commented, still lying on the table.

"He's full of surprises," Nagase commented as she stood up.

I had to agree with that assessment. Pops was basically a grandfather to the entire squadron and we knew barely anything really about him. Not that we needed to know anything though. He was the kind of person one could implicitly trust, no evidence needed.

"If only I had the joined the Emmerian Air Force. Then I wouldn't have to go on missions like these," Chopper lamented.

"Except you're not Emmerian," I reminded him. I'm not sure, but Chopper was probably fourth or fifth generation Osean.

"That's beside the point kid. Do we have any orders for the rest of day?" he asked, and I shook my head. "Good because I'm going to go sleep now."

"It's not even four yet," Nagase said.

"That's past my bedtime." He jumped off the table. "If you want Nagase, you can come read me story. Make it worth your while?" he called as he walked out of the rec. room.

"I'll pass thanks," she yelled after him.

"I actually have duties to do Captain," Grimm said meekly.

"Really?" It kind of surprised. "What?"

Grimm's eyes darted back and forth when I asked. "Uh…it's a bit of a story…it's really nothing Captain. I will be at the briefing tomorrow morning." He gave me a hasty salute, which in itself was odd since he never saluted me, and then left the room.

"What was that about?" I asked Nagase.

"He probably got in trouble with someone. I know the Tower chief was really mad at him the other day," she replied.

"Oh." I had hardly even talked to the guys in the Tower, and knew little about the chief. I can only imagine what Grimm must have done. "Well whatever."

"You want to get something to eat?" Nagase surprised me. "I know you're hungry. You barely eat anything Blaze." She talked to me in almost a lecturing tone. I didn't she paid that much attention to my habits. I always thought it was the other way around.

"Honestly, most of the time I just forget. It's just such a hassle to get over there in the morning," I admitted.

"Yeah," she mocked me, "because it's so far away." She gave me a disciplining whack with her book. That brought back some memories from my time at the orphanage. "C'mon it's not that bad," she told me, and led the way.

There was still plenty of food left from the lunch fortunately, well enough to fill a whole plate with something edible. Sand Island never had the best food, a result of the fact that it was an island. By then the lunch crowd had cleared out, so we had the whole place pretty much to ourselves. At most military all base personnel had a set time for each meal, and only that set time for each meal. But since we were Captains, we were privileged to set our own meals times. Most bases would also have an officer's lounge for that sort of thing. Sand Island had one, but it was empty. So all higher ranking officers were mostly left to their own whims; the Base Commander always ate in his office; I haven't a clue what his adjutant did for his meals. Many more would just order and take it somewhere. I typically took mine outside somewhere, or just ate in the mess if there wasn't a mad house. And the latter is what the two of us did.

"I kind of like this place when no one's in it," I said once we had sat down.

"Yeah," she agreed looking around as the staff were sweeping up. "A long time ago my mother used to always drag me to church. She was so paranoid about being late that she would make sure to get us there _at least _half-an-hour early. Which meant were usually the first ones there. I hated getting up on a Sunday, but once we got there I always liked being alone there."

"You liked going to mass?" I asked.

"No I hated the mass. It was so boring, and it was packed. But when no one was there…there was something—majestic about the place. Uh, I am not describing it well."

"No I get want you mean. It was Monday morning for me, up at six for a seven-thirty a.m. mass. I would sit in the pew and wish it would just never start." I made to sure to emphasize the time of day. Nagase was laughing, probably at the vigor with which I said. I rarely felt so funny. "You're laughing, but it's terrible for a kid. The kneeling! The standing! The bread, the wine, the bells, and please don't mention the choir. Worst day of week."

"You know I bet it wasn't that bad Blaze," she jabbed.

"Oh yeah it was. Plus Father Thomas always had something special to say to the kids, usually somehow related to me," I retorted.

Nagase laughed slightly but then gave me a sort of empathic look. "So that was at the orphanage you grew up in right?"

I sort of choked on what I was about to say. I guessed I had let down my guard I had forgotten that I had never really told anyone about that place. "Uh yeah. That's where I grew up. I guess you might've not known."

"No, I had heard, but I never have really heard you talk about it," she explained.

"Oh." It was reasonable I suppose that she knew. Bartlett had known somehow. Chopper knew probably from someone he knew, that had known me at the academy. It wasn't that I tried to hide, but it also wasn't something I liked to share.

"Yeah it's not a particularly happy part of my life. Not many good memories to share," I admitted.

"Why?" she quickly asked, leaning forward in her chair. It was easy to see how curious she was about me. But soon after she asked she relented, "I mean…if you don't mind…"

"It's fine. There's nothing really bad about it. You know, I was older when I first arrived. Most of the other kids had been there since they were toddlers. I just felt alienated." That was an understatement. But I didn't even then quite have the self-clarity to explain it with any eloquence.

Nagase's eyes fell down to table. "That sounds lonely. I'm sorry." She said despondently. The only thing I could think about that was "what does she have to be sorry for?" I felt like apologizing to her. I never wanted my own sadness to become someone else's.

"Can I ask you something else Blaze?" she said. She was still looking down.

"Sure. You don't need my permission Nagase."

"Well—did you know your parents?"

That stopped my brain cold. I think my mouth might have hung open for few seconds. That was a question no one had ever asked me. It's a perfectly reasonable question. I'm an orphan. Many orphans never know their parents, yet no one had ever asked. Even when I was a kid at the orphanage, no one. I can remember as a kid thinking about a lot, who they might've been. I sometimes walked my mind back to where they had found me on the round somewhere near the coast. Each time I would remember the hospital and all the broken needles that were in my arms and legs. I would feel such a foreboding, like I was approaching a dark place, a secret that I wasn't meant to know. But that was all. I never had any dreams about them, never any buried memories coming to the surface. It was like they were just erased from my existence. And that was enough to deter me from every mentioning it, even to a friend.

That was before though. I looked at Nagase then, her beautiful face that had such a fierce determination and her eyes that had the tenderest compassion. Here was a woman that had saved my life, who's life I had saved, who gave up a command to protect me, who was determined enough to survive the cold wasteland and return triumphant. She was my wingman. And all she asking was to know the truth about me. So I swallowed my doubt then.

"No. I don't remember anything about them. It's just gone, like it was never there," I said, being very careful not to stumble on a single word. Nagase didn't flinch or betray any emotion, but I could see a great movement behind her eyes. I decided I should just tell her everything, not leave a detail out; even the bizarre and disturbing.

"I was told that they found me walking alone on the side of the road. I looked pretty beaten up, so they took me to a hospital. A psychologist said I was totally amnesic. I couldn't remember anything; where I was from, who my parents were, or even how old I was. I ended up staying a few days while the police searched for any family but…"

"They didn't find anything," Nagase completed the thought.

"Yeah, at least not about where I came from," I confirmed.

There was a brief moment of silence, where the sad truth about me seemed to take the air out of the room. Nagase looked down, her eyes focused on some particular spot, but yet her eyes also were lost in contemplation. She took a deep breath and then fell back into her chair, bringing her hands close to her chest. "When was this?" she asked in a whisper.

"Oh, it was the end of 1994...almost 1995," I answered. Exactly how long it was before I went to orphanage I didn't know. "Kei—at the hospital though, they find something." She looked at me then. "Along with some old fractures in my arms and legs, they found several broken needles that had been pushed into my skin."

"Needles?" Her face twisted in a strange confusion. "Like…? But…" She grasped for an ineffable question.

"I don't know. No one knows what it was. And no one wants to think about what it might be…" I answered, as best I could.

Nagase didn't say anything, but that's not to say that she didn't show any reaction. She seemed to be fighting back the terrible thoughts. I knew what they were. There wasn't anything that she was thinking that I hadn't thought. What else could you imagine but the worst things possible? It seemed Nagase was trying to find the benign possibilities.

It was quiet for awhile before she said anything. "Have you ever tried to find them Blaze? Yourself?"

I shook my head. "I've only ever thought about it," I responded. "It's not even clear where to start looking though. They weren't any missing children reports filed about me. And then the Ulysses fell. If there was anything to follow, I don't think it would have lasted through that. Maybe it had something to do with the Ulysses."

Nagase nodded. "I remember the Ulysses. Did you see them Blaze, when they first fell?"

I hadn't. But my memory back then wasn't very good. I can imagine there were a lot more things that happened that completely escapes me for one reason or another.

I shook my head. "The first wave of them began at night, and lasted into the next day. I remember looking through my window and thinking that I was standing in the middle of a freeway at night. There were thousands of lights raining down at me all at once. They were so bright and they came down so fast. I thought the world was going to end."

"I bet a lot of people did. The world did end for a lot of people on Usea and elsewhere," I remarked. "A lot of places still haven't recovered."

"Yeah. I get the feeling sometimes when I think about the Ulysses and all the turmoil that they caused, that there's more than just the hand of fate at work."

"Like the Razgriz you mean?"

She smiled finally. "Do you ever get that feeling Blaze?"

I took a deep breath. "Oh I don't know. Whenever I try to guess the future I make the wrong conclusions."

"Yeah. Maybe I'm just a dreamer?" she admitted with some dismay.

"That's not a bad thing."

"I'm glad you think so. Everything's just changing so much. I didn't think I'd ever be in this place," she fell back into her chair.

I understood exactly what she meant. For most of my life I used to having my future as clear as a brick wall, then I joined the Osean Air Defense Force and suddenly I was in some torrent, washed together by the hand of fate. We didn't even know what our mission was going to be the next morning. The whole of our fates seemed to be tittering on the edge of a coin. But she was talking about a lot more than just us.

We spent much of next hour just chatting about this and that, till we both decided we both should really stop wasting our time. Though if you ask me, time spent talking to Nagase, is much more productive than studying any brief for combat. The rest of that evening I felt much liked I used to when I was back in school; I wished the morning might just never come.

Up at 0500 the next morning. It was little easier to pull myself out of my bead to go to work than the previous morning, though not by much. Fifteen minutes of quickly showering and I was out of my quarters walking to find something with caffeine. A few quick steps out the door and Chopper stumbled out of his quarters and, despite the extra sleep he got, he didn't look any more awake than I felt.

"Ah I'm never going to get used to this Kid," he groaned, and walked with me as I passed by.

"Sorry to hear that. 'Cause it's not going to change any time soon," I reminded him. Did he think it was easy the rest of us?"

A few minutes of zombie-like walking and we were at the mess. Nagase was already there grabbing herself some light breakfast. She was always the most punctual out of the four of us. I drifted over next, as the coffee was there, and the doughnuts, though they were a bit stale.

"Good morning," she said, holding her cup close to her face.

"Morning," I replied fumbling with the crème.

"How early do you wake up?" Chopper asked.

"I set my alarm for 0430. Though I usually don't get up till around 0435," she answered.

"Are you kidding me? I didn't even open my eyes till ten minutes ago," Chopper said loudly. "When did you get up?" he turned to me.

"Five," I replied.

"At least he's saner than you are," Chopper told her.

"I'm a little lethargic and listless in the morning okay," she defended herself.

"Oh my god, you're even using SAT words," Chopper remarked, and then poured about five sugars into his large cup of coffee.

"Uh," Nagase lamented, not even trying to parry that one.

"Did you see Grimm?" I asked her. It wouldn't be unlike him to oversleep.

"He's already in there," she replied.

"Someone should tell him there are no brownie points for being early," Chopper suggested.

"No, but there are penalties for being late. Let's go," I ordered and proceeded to the briefing room.

We arrived a few minutes before the start. As usual no one was there except Grimm who had been waiting about ten minutes already. 0530 came and past, and still neither Perrault nor Hamilton had entered the room. That was unusual, but it didn't really bother us; it was too early in the morning to fret about what their tardiness could mean. I just short sat self-hypnotized for the few minutes till someone finally came through the door. Except it wasn't Hamilton or the base commander, it was someone I, we hadn't expected to see ever again.

"Good morning. Pleasure to see you all again," he said looking around the room.

It was him, the Colonel from Oured, the same whit haired Air Force officer that gave us orders to deploy to Apito Air Port even though we were under investigation for bombing a Yuktobanian college. It felt like ages since that happened, yet there he was standing right in front of us. And even at that hour we were surprised.

"Especially you," he added, looking at me, "Captain. Very impressive."

Nagase mouth hung open for a moment, as if she was about to shout at him. Chopper though said it for her, "What are you doing here...sir?"

"Just to pay you four a visit, believe it or not," he answered.

"It's not for me," I commented.

The Colonel just smiled at the audacity. "Well that and it's 20 degrees in Oured right now. You're all lucky enough to be stationed on a tropical island, so why not come down personally to brief you."

From that point of view I couldn't really blame him. I hated the snow and the cold. I can only bet Nagase was thinking the same thing.

"But none of that is important right now," he continued and as he was speaking Colonel Perrault and Hamilton walked into the briefing room through the door he had just come out of.

"Settle down people," Hamilton said as they entered. Perrault seemed slightly less angry at us than he usually was. We took it as a sign that the operation was pretty serious. As usual Hamilton proceeded to set up the projector while Perrault took center stage.

"Well this is it! Our ground forces will engage in a decisive battle with the enemy's main force in the Jilachi desert. If our army wins this showdown of military might, we'll just be a hair away from total victory." He actually seemed proud as he was talking. I couldn't tell if he was showing off for the Colonel from Central, or if he was just having one of those rare moments. "We still got some work for you too, so don't slack off now."

That was one of three times I heard his attempt at humor. I could never take it that seriously. Chopper could barely keep his jaw from dropping, and I guess Nagase and Grimm were having similar thoughts to mine.

It was a two pronged operation, with multiple objectives, spanning the entire Jilachi Desert. There were three main targets; the enemy's field HQ located in the North, an oil facility located in the South next the Semya River, and an airfield located in the West. Heavy bombers were being sent in to destroy the field HQ, the 1st and 2nd tank battalions would capture the enemy airfield, and the 3rd tank battalion would capture the oil facility. To stand in their way, the Yuktobanians had placed significant ground forces not to mention the massive air power the airfield boasted. Generally the battle would be segregated into two main operations; Operation Desert Arrow in the North, and Operation Desert Blitz in the South.

Hamilton didn't need to say what our job would be. We were going to have to support ground forces and the bombers as they advanced on the enemy's position. The only question was where our priorities would be. The area was too large for four planes to cover on our own. Throughout the whole briefing the Colonel from Central said nothing, hardly even looked up to see what was in the projector.

"This is by far the most important operation to date," the Base Commander interjected at the end. "Osea's relying on you people. Don't let us down."

We all stood as Perrault walked out of the room. Hamilton hanged back for a moment. "Colonel Burton here is going to give you further orders for deployment. All operations are set to begin at 1050 hours. Good luck."

Hamilton then stepped out, leaving the four of us once again alone in the room with that Colonel from Central. We stood quietly as he looked at the four us, judging us. "Well you have the details. The Yukes won't give up Jilachi without throwing everything plane they have ready against us. So you flying aces are sorely needed, even if just for morale. You understand me Captain?"

"I understand perfectly," I replied. He talked to us much the same way he did back in the Capital, like we were some kind of joke, or at least like he was far above us.

"So it's your turn," he told me.

"What?"

"It's your turn to choose what mission this time." He couldn't be serious.

"Whadaya mean it's our turn to choose?" Chopper screamed.

"The operation space is too large for you to cover effectively if it's not obvious to you," the Colonel replied.

"But how...?" Grimm blurted.

"How can we choose what area to cover?" Nagase interjected. "We don't know how the situation will unfold."

"True, but that's not important at the moment. How about we do it the same way as last time," the Colonel said, and reached into his pocket, pulling a quarter. I wonder if it was the same quarter he used back in the Capital. He showed on side to me. "Heads Desert Arrow, tails Desert Blitz."

"Wait a minute!" Chopper yelled, but the Colonel just flipped it. And the four of us watched transfixed as it tumbled through the air and landed on the conference table...

He ordered us to launch a second later.

"Pilot's check your planes and prepare for refueling." It was the usual message from all the refueling crews we ever encountered. All the crews sort of sounded the same too, even though with hundreds of crews in the Osean military there didn't seem to be much variation.

It was 1030, nearly the operational time. We just on the edge of the Jilachi desert according to the GPS, but already there seemed to nothing but sand under us. I had never been in a place like it before. The closest thing to a real desert I had ever encountered was the beaches on Sand Island. While the others were up refueling there planes I kept stealing looks at the ground. I had thought that Glubina looked desolate, but was nothing to how hopeless that landscape was.

As usual I was the last to refuel. Same it as it always was. We broke off from the refueling tanker just as some other squadrons were moving in.

"Alright, everyone ready?" I hailed.

"Standing by Blaze," Nagase acknowledged.

"Ready to go Captain," Grimm responded.

"I'm ready kid, for like five minutes now," Chopper said.

"Good." I took in the airspace ahead of us for moment. Even at twenty thousand feet I couldn't see the edge of it. And in a few sort minutes there was about to be battle over the whole region. Even compared to taking on the Hrimfaxi, it was a little bit nerve- wracking. Best to just not think about it.

"Thunderhead this is Wardog, reporting in," I hailed our friendly AWACS. No matter where we were deployed, it was the same crew to greet us. I wonder if it was planned by High Command or were we just that lucky?

"Roger Wardog. It's about time. Stand by," Thunderhead responded.

"I doubt the ground forces are having much fun down there," Grimm observed.

"Which is worse you think, the enemy shooting in front of you, or the burning sand under you?" Chopper posed.

Before anyone answered Thunderhead as expected chimed in, "cut the chatter Wardog. Operations will commence in two minutes."

"Yeah, probably both suck pretty bad right. I'm sweating up here," Chopper answered himself.

"I repeat, cut the chatter."

I heard some low muttering, before he went quiet. The worst and unfortunately the most ubiquitous part of flying was the waiting. The anxiety going in was almost as bad as the battle itself.

Two minutes passed pretty quickly though. "This is Thunderhead, Operation Desert Arrow is now commencing. All planes move in to cover advancing forces."

I let out the breath I had been holding for that moment and increased my throttle toward the target space. All I was thinking at that moment was 'here it goes again.'

"Man this is ridiculous," Chopper said. "I can't believe they chose our next mission with a damn coin again!" I had a feeling he had been holding that in for the last several hours.

"This is Thunderhead, Captain Davenport how many times do I have to tell to cut the chatter?" the AWACS commander scolded.

"Thunderhead, this is Razgriz 3, roger that," Chopper responded, and I even cracked a smile under my flight mask.

"...what did you just say?" Thunderhead said back. But as we went farther into the airspace we were already getting multiple support requests from the Osean forces.

"Our target is the enemy's field HQ. Initiated bomb run." The bomber squadron said over the radio. "Viking 1 to support fighters, requesting escort to target."

"Hawk division, begin your advance! Target enemy airfield." The 1st Tank battalion announced. "Attention Air Force, requesting close air support for our unit."

A few more support requests came soon after. I never felt so popular in a battlefield before.

"I feel like a waiter taking orders in a packed restaurant," Grimm commented.

"Yeah someone please put some roller-skates on my feet," Chopper agreed.

"We're going to be pretty busy for the next several hours. Get used to it," I reminded them.

"When you put it like that kid, you make me really depressed," Chopper replied.

"I have enemy fighters on radar closing in on Viking one," Nagase said. "Looks like our decision's been made for us."

I looked at my radar. The fighters were practically on top of the bombers. What were the escorts doing? "Alright we're intercepting them. Everyone on me."

"Roger that Captain," Grimm said.

We were in visual range of the bombers within one minute. The formation had scattered because of the enemy, and we see at least one trailing smoke. "The bombers are taking fire. Where are the escorts?" Chopper yelled.

"They must be mixed up with the enemy," Grimm answered. "I've got a lot of fighters the IFF."

I looked, and he was right. There were only about eight fighters in the escorted squadron, while the enemy fighters were nearly double that. In short they were in a bad situation. "Alright we're going in. Everyone mark a target and watch your tail," I ordered.

We moved in fast. Soon enough the allied squadron took note of us made contact. "Attention approaching allied squadron, we can't cover the bombers completely. Please lend us your aid."

Nagase responded, "Roger that. We're coming to your assistance."

We closed in on the rear of the squadron. For the most part it seemed to be intact, but I could see two enemy fighters circling in for an attack run. "I've got two coming in, 10-a-clock high."

"I see them Blaze. Locking on..." Nagase responded. She fired and the missile hit the bandit square in the tail. It trailed smoke, before I saw the pilot eject. "Got 'em."

The other enemy fighter evaded running back to the rest of his squadron. Smart. We could hear his frantic chatter over the radio. "Dammit! The Captain's just been shot down!"

"Nice kill, Edge," I said. "Let's go give the escorts hand." Most of the escorts were flying just above the flight path of the bombers, spread out in the big cloud. The enemy had broken formation taking on the allied planes two-on-one, and if it went on much longer it was clear the allied planes would be in serious trouble. "Alright break off. Keep them away from the bombers."

"Roger that kid. Looks like we're gonna crash this party," Chopper acknowledged as we separated.

Nagase stayed close to me as I went high. Two of our guys had three bandits all over their tails. "I got three on the nose Edge. You see them?"

"I see them Blaze. You go in, I'll go trail and follow," she confirmed.

The two allied pilots hailed us. "Finally some support! This is Viper 11. We'd really appreciated it if you got these guys off us!"

"This is Wardog, we got your back Viper 11." I said as I lined up the shot, got tone and fired. The enemy began to evade too late and the missile hit. "Bandit down."

"He's coming around us Blaze," Nagase warned me, as one the enemy fighters pulled up, obviously turning to fall in on my tail. There was still one more engaging Viper though.

"I'll handle him. You take the one ahead of us." I pulled up after him, clenching the throttle tightly during the high-g turn. As soon as he leveled he immediately hooked a hard right to throw my shot. He was good. He inverted soon after that into a split-s maneuver. I was betting he expected to lose me there, but I stayed with him. I pulled nose a little high and fired my guns. His tail sparked and then caught fire.

"What? He got me? There's no way!"

He was losing altitude fast, and I could enough fuel leaking to tell he wasn't going to be in the air much longer. I pulled up to rejoin Nasgase, who had just shot down the other bandit. "Bandit down Blaze, nice flying!" She said enthusiastically.

"I just got lucky that he didn't turn faster than I did," I said. Chopper and Grimm shot down another two of the enemy before they pulled out.

"They're running scared kid." Chopper reported.

"I see it Chopper, good work. Viking 1 this is Wardog, enemy fighters are no factor," I stated.

"Roger Wardog. Thanks for the cover."

"Okay," I muttered. I was already started to feel a little taxed, and the operations were just beginning. Massive battles like that were hardly ever short, at least for pilots. "Let's form up and cover the ground forces."

I thought we might get few minutes without any enemy action. At least I was hoping for it. That wasn't to be though.

"This is Thunderhead. Wardog we have enemy fighters incoming on the 1st tank battalion. Turn to intercept!" Thunderhead practically screamed at us.

"What happened to the squadrons covering them.?" Nagase responded.

"They've been shot down. You're the only ones we have available to cover the advance."

That hit me as a shock. There were at least two squadrons that were covering them. We were already down ordinance and we had to go cover the whole advance on our own. Perfect.

"Great," Chopper echoed my frustration. "Just leave the whole thing to us right? Sometimes I get the feeling like we're being used again."

"You mean like the university bombing," Grimm added.

"Well we don't have time to chat about it," I said. "Max thrust. We have to give them cover if the operation is going to succeed."

We formed up and changed our vector, heading back toward the front line of our tank battalion. Even without any interruption, we were still a few minutes away at full throttle. And of course it wasn't going to go without interruption. We had four small contacts straight ahead of us, with no friendly IFF squawk.

If there was any doubt that they weren't allies, Thunderhead yelled at us a moment later. "Wardog, there's an enemy squadron heading right for you!"

"Acknowledged Thunderhead. We have them on radar," Nagase responded.

"You think they're targeting us?" Grimm asked skeptically. "Not the bombers."

"Well I'm sure they won't mind shooting us down first Grimm," Chopper hissed back at him.

I kept looking at the IFF and then up at the sky. Sure enough in a moment they were four black points in formation flying toward us. The points resolved into four F-16 860's, some pretty new and spiffy fighters. We had only gotten intelligence about them a few weeks ago. Great.

As an added bonus the radio began to pick their communications. "Is that them?"

"Yeah, no mistake about it, the Razgriz."

"Well I think that confirms it," Chopper announced. "And I'm spiked!"

I was too. They were tracking all of us on radar. "Stay in formation. Let 'em passes over us," I ordered. They did a moment later. My plane shook as we flew through their jet wash. "Alright bank left!" Even I strained against the force of that turn. I scanned the sky ahead of us for them, but I'd lost them. "Anyone see them?"

"I got them Captain. Ten-o-clock!" I looked and there they were, almost ready to fire. "They're targeting me."

"I've got you covered Grimm," Chopper said.

"Alright break off! Everyone keep an eye on their six," I ordered, and everyone acknowledged. I saw Grimm jink right with one of the 860's on his tail. Chopper followed suit, flying low to try a get good angles on the bogey. I pulled left and high trying to dry away some of the fighters. It worked, two of them got on my tail, and not a second later my missile alarm went off. "Dammit."

"Blaze missile!" Nagase yelled at me. I pulled the plane hard to the right, the rolled over just in time, a tried I saw Bartlett pull once or twice. It worked though. The missile passed harmlessly a few hundred feet above me. A little bit too close though.

"He dodged it? Ahh!"

I heard Nagase yell "Fox 2," and one of the bandits dropped off radar. "Splash one!"

"No! Voshkod 2 was shot down! Dammit!" The other enemy plane kicked up his throttle, coming head on right at me. "If I can just take him down...!" I did the same, kicking up my throttle till he was just in missile range, fired and rolled out of the way. He didn't have much of a chance to get away.

"Alright," I muttered to myself. My heart rate was up a little bit after that exchange.

"Bandit down." Nagase confirmed the kill.

I pulled around trying to find Grimm, right as I heard curse over the radio. " Ah! I can't shake this guy!" I pulled around and found him circling around above me with the enemy trying to hit him with gunfire. Chopper was there though, not far behind. That still left one though. I scanned around till I found him, preying down on Nagase.

"Edge look out he's above you!" I shouted. She immediately pulled away, evading before he could get a lock.

"We have to stop you here, or else it's all over!" the voice of the enemy piloted sounded beyond desperate. He was coming at her more than aggressively, almost savagely. Nagase pulled hard to evade, and I could her struggling against the forces of the turn.

"I got you covered Edge." I flew in after him. He was so fixating on shooting Nagase down. It wasn't that hard to get a shot. "Fox two!" The missile hit him in the wing, sending him spiraling off to the side. That was the third I had shot down that day.

"Thanks Blaze," Nagase said out of breath.

"Enemy down, whew!" Chopper said. I looked and confirmed the destroyed F-16. "That guy was really gunning for you Grimm."

"Yeah I thought he had me a few times there," Grimm thanked him.

"That wasn't a normal squadron," Nagase said. "They didn't even care about attacking our forces. Just went after us."

"It was bound to happen. The Yukes know who we are," I added my two cents about it.

"Well that's a comforting thought to have kid," Chopper remarked. I had to agree. It was the sort of thing they would say about the old war Ace of Aces; it was the grand title, so everyone was looking to knock you down to take it from you. "Still they probably don't..." I began, but Thunderhead's heavy voice came screaming over the intercom.

"Wardog! What are you doing? Our ground forces are under enemy attack!"

I gritted my teeth at that interruption. I understood orders but we needed a moment to recover from enemy attacks on us. "Damn... Alright, Edge, Chopper, Archer, you ready."

"As we'll ever be Captain," Chopper acknowledged.

"Okay," I pushed up the throttle and changed vector back on our previous course. For a minute I was still kind of pissed at Thunderhead, but I overhead enough ground communications to realize that they were heavy bombardment. Eventually the ground commanders sent out a general cry of help.

"This is Bishop. All aircraft flying support in our area, clear out the enemy jets above us. They've got us pinned down here." There were clear sounds of explosions in the background even with the poor sound quality.

"Sounds bad," Nagase commented. I didn't say anything. We had the enemy on the IFF, it was only a few more minutes till we were in missile range.

"Captain," Grimm said out of the blue. "Did I ever tell you about my brother?"

"What?" I almost didn't hear the question. It seemed so off topic to me, it was like it had been said in foreign language. My brain scramble for some sort of reply. I had vague recollection of some conversation, but nothing more than that. I couldn't come up with any smarter reply than "No, I don't think so."

"I have an older brother," he continued. "If he's okay, he should be participating in this operation..."

"Is that true Grimm?" Nagase asked.

"You might've told us about this sooner. Just like last time," Chopper scolded him.

"Last time?" Nagase wondered. I was thinking the same thing.

"We don't have time for this," I ended the conversation. We had just gotten in range. I could the enemy against the sand, enemy X-45 models. It looked like about half a dozen of them and possibly some helicopters raining hell down on one of the tank companies. "Everyone arm the XMAA's." I ordered.

"Roger that Blaze," Nagase said. I had on two enemy attackers a second later. "I've got tone," she confirmed her radar lock.

"Fox three, fox three," I announced and it was missiles away. They flew hot, straight and normal toward the targets. A moment later I saw the multiple flashes of red. Both of my missiles hit. Nagase also hit two, so did Chopper, and Grimm hit three.

"Missile impact confirmed," I stated just as we began to pass over our forces position.

"The other planes are retreating," Grimm reported, and I checked the IFF to make sure. Indeed they were pulling back, at least for the moment. It was fortunate for us since we were running low on missile ordinance.

One of the battalion confirmed it, "This is Hawk 1, looks like the air attack is finally over. We're resuming our advance on the enemy airfield."

"Roger Hawk 1. Wardog maintain position, and provide Hawk and Bishop Units with close air support. We're forwarding reinforcements to back you up," Thunderhead ordered us.

"Wardog roger," I responded. "Maintaining current position." I let out a big sigh then. I was tired by the time we made it to the combat zone, after all those engagements I hard time not slumping down in my flight seat.

"I hear ya kid. How long are they gonna keep us out here?" Chopper commented. "Can you find your brother's position on the battlefield Grimm?"

"Sir we can't pick favorites," Grimm retorted. "Everyone down there needs our help."

"Fine. Then everyone down there's your brother."

We took a high combat position above the ground forces, as we waited for the reinforcements to arrive. We had a grand view of the combat going on bellow us. Huge plumes of the dust from the artillery formed massive columns in the sky, and shrouded much of the battlefield. Still we could see our allies' position bellow us. Bishop, the rear guard, engaged the enemy's main tank force. Hawk division rolled a head to capture the airfield. There pace was pretty slow, giving me worries. Occasionally our attackers would fly in to pound the enemy tanks further. The only thing that bothered was the lack of enemy air power. Despite all the units we had engaged we weren't seeing that much strength from the Yukes.

"The desert heat is robbing the ground forces of their mobility," Nagase observed after a few minutes. I agreed, and that meant bad things for us. I had the feeling that we didn't have much time for enemy counterattacked. If they ground forces couldn't get hold of their positions in time, we might not be able to cover them.

"I wonder how the other operation is doing," Grimm posited, referring to the back of the coin I guess. I had similar thoughts on my mind.

I only had maybe two minutes to ponder though before our reinforcements arrived. The unit consisted of about a dozen planes, coming in on our rear. It turned out to be someone we knew.

"We look who it is. Nice to see the 'Four Wings of Sand Island' again," a familiar voice hailed over the radio.

"What?" I couldn't pin down who it was at first.

"Hey! Wizard! You're still alive?" Chopper immediately identified him. I couldn't really believe. It was that same rookie who I chose to lead all the nuggets when Sand Island was attacked. I was dumbfounded for a moment, one that he was here, and two that it had only been about a month and a half since he was transferred off Sand Island. Yet he was there, with a whole squad at his command. I suppose I had a good eye for talent. I wonder what Bartlett would think of it.

"Still alive and flying. I'm the lead of Halo Squadron now," Wizard, or rather Halo 1 replied. They flew in on our wing, and I waved a greeting. It was about twelve fighters in all, half were flying F-18 E's like ours. The rest were sporting F- 16C's and two F-15E's. It was a lot of firepower in a single squadron. Just the site of it seemed to give me energy.

"This is Edge. It's an honor to have you flying with us again."

"The honor's all ours. It's not every day I get to fly with the Demons of Razgriz themselves," one of the other members of Halo said. He seemed to almost congratulate us.

"Don't flatter us too much," I said back to him. "You'll make us reckless."

"Yes sir!" How did everyone in the Osean military already know about that nickname?

The AWACS contacted us a moment later, "This is Thunderhead. Halo Squadron provide close air support to Bishop. Wardog, push ahead to..." He stopped short yet again. I thought for a moment they crew had just hit turbulence. That or maybe they were confused about where to send us. When a few seconds went by, that's when I started to get nervous.

"Wardog to Thunderhead. We didn't read that. Come in..." I tried to contact them. Then Nagase gave it a go.

"Standby..." was all they said back to us.

"I bet we're gonna love this," Chopper remarked.

"You think there's something..." Nagase began to ask, but Thunderhead cut her off.

"Belay that! All allied planes, we've detected a large contingent of enemy planes. Confirmed enemy AWACS among them. Destroy it and maintain air superiority above the battlefield. Sending data now."

An enemy AWACS? I didn't think the Yukes would deploy one in those conditions. I guess it showed how determined they were to keep us out of there. The data download completed a moment later, and more than a few of us cursed audibly over the radio. There were thirty at least forty aircraft on the IFF, probably more. I was right, and I didn't want to be.

"Unbelievable!" one of the Halo pilots said.

"And of course they would get here now," Chopper lamented. "It's always this way."

"They're trying to overwhelm us. Some of them are headed toward Viking 1!" Nagase said.

She was right. Several of the enemy units were breaking off to intercept the bombers on the IFF. Their numbers were more than enough to get past the escorting squadron,

"That's the least of our problems," Chopper interjected. "The rest of 'em are headed this way. What do we do kid?"

"We'll follow your lead Blaze," Halo One stated.

It was a bad situation. If we got bogged down fending off their attacks against the ground forces, the bombers would be helpless against their numbers. Even with Halo's help. I could only see one thing to do, and it wasn't going to be easy.

"Alright, Halo will engage the bandits heading towards our tanks. While Wardog pushed forward to destroy enemy AWACS," I announced. It was course of action we had really. Even with the sizable numbers defending the plane, if we attacked fast we could destroy it before the Yuktobanian fighters knew what was happening. Not to mention the added shock of the Razgriz blitzing straight them, at least that what I was gambling on.

"Roger. Good hunting Razgriz!" Halo One cheered us on as we pulled away at full throttle.

We quickly raised altitude to that of the enemy AWACS. It was an anxious few seconds flying toward the formation, and I was feeling some déjà vu about the assault on Sand Island. I kept my hand on the throttle even though it was at its max position. It wasn't long before we got a visual on the first group of enemy fighters.

"I've got four bandits on the nose Captain," Grimm reported. I saw them too. It looked like four more of those F-16C 860's.

"They've come to meet us at the door," Chopper said. "Should we break off kid?"

"No. Keep max throttle and arm the XMAA's," I ordered.

"Blaze if we shoot them down we might not have enough ammo to destroy the AWACS," Nagase protested, and she was right of course, but that wasn't what I have in mind.

"We don't need to shoot them down. We just need to break their formation. So we're going to play a little chicken, blow through," I replied. I'll admit it wasn't the most brilliant strategy but it was all we had at that point.

"What?" Grimm exclaimed, but there wasn't any time to talk about it further.

"Everyone target each plane. Get ready break hard and make sure you don't crash into them!"

I bet Bartlett would have said it was a stupid and risky maneuver that had a good chance of getting us killed along with the enemy. But I bet he also would've thought it was pretty gutsy. And it paid off too. They pulled down and right, clearing the way ahead of us.

"It worked!" Grimm yelled.

"What else would they when they have the four of us charging straight at them. That was kinda fun kid!"

"More enemy fighters are closing in. Coming on all sides," Nagase warned us.

"Just keep an eye on them," I replied. We continued to push ahead. Soon enough we had a visual on the enemy planes. They were quite a few of them. There were two KC-10's refueling aircraft, and a large group of Yuke fighters in line to refuel behind them. All of them began to breakaway. Straight ahead, just above us was the AWACS, the standard type E-767.

"Here it comes. That's the boss right?" Chopper asked.

"If there ever was one Captain Chopper," Grimm answered.

"Okay, Chopper team attack the AWACS. Edge and I will cover you and destroy the enemy tanker craft," I ordered.

"Roger kid. We got this Grimm," Chopper acknowledged. They broke off just as the enemy fighters were engaging us.

"Ready Edge?"

"Yeah. Let's go!"

Three Rafale M's were coming at us. We turned into them. They obviously we're trying to keep us as far away from the refueling craft as possible. Wasn't going to work though. "Edge what's your ordinance?"

"I've got two XMAA's left."

"We'll fly right past these guys then break right and make for the tanker. Alright?"

"Wilco. I'm ready when you are," Nagase complied. The enemy approached quickly. We eased off the after burners but we were still flying near max thrust. I could see the glare off their canopies as we passed over them. One of the fighters let loose a missile, but it was way too late.

"Now!" We pulled hard right bringing the black hull of the KC-10 right into view, in perfect firing position. The HUD went red and we both fired. Both missile hit just below the fuselage, and the entire plane was engulfed in a huge ball of orange flame. "Enemy tanker down."

"Blaze, they're coming around on our tail," Nagase warned.

"Let's lead them down to low altitude. Chopper, Archer what's your status?"

"We almost got 'em kid. They're running high and fast," Chopper reported.

"We got enemy fighters coming in bellow us Captain Chopper," Grimm announced.

"Never mind them! Two more seconds I have this guy," Chopper replied. "Fox Three!" I watched the missile release from his Hornet, my radar warning came on. I pulled another high-g turn left. Moments later Chopper confirmed. "AWACS down! We shot down the enemy AWACS."

Almost immediately there a lot of confused enemy chatter over the radio. Whatever encryption they had been using ceased once the aircraft was destroyed.

"What? They shot it down?"

"It's them I told you! The ones who sunk the Hrimfaxi."

The planes that were marking Nagase and me pulled away, not in any maneuver though. It looked like a confused mess on the IFF.

"Confirmed," Thunderhead said over the radio. "Enemy AWACS shot down. The enemy's air forces are falling apart."

Nagase and I rejoined Grimm and Chopper. The enemy was in the area with force. Even with their AWACS gone they could still prove problematic, so we kept our heads on a swivel. Lucky for us though, the enemy decided not to stick around for that long.

"Everyone pull out! We can't fight in these conditions. We need to cover the ground forces as they retreat," was the order we heard over the radio. And all the enemies began to vector toward the Southwest. The chatter ceased soon after that.

"Looks like we've done it," Nagase said after a moment.

"This is Viking One, it looks enemy fighters are no factor. Our track's green. Give our thanks to the pilots."

"Halo One here. All enemy fighters are in retreat. Nice job Wardog!"

"You know it's nice to have friends out here," Chopper commented.

"Thanks Halo," I replied. "You guys make through okay?"

"Halo 11 was shot down but he's alright, just got picked up by the ground forces."

I looked at Nagase's plane when he said that. This was an even worst place to be shot down than Glubina. At least he didn't have to wait long to be rescued though.

"This is Thunderhead, Wardog maintain your position and continue to provide support for ground forces."

I acknowledged, over some definite moaning from Chopper and everyone else. The enemy had retreated. We were low on ordinance and fuel. No mentions the extreme heat, and we still couldn't get a break. Still, we had to follow orders right?

We remained in the airspace for over and our after that. Actually maybe it was two hours. Whatever amount of time it was, it seemed like it would never end, just like the battle we were participating in. And it was so hot in the cockpit…

We were already passed the point of returning to Sand Island with our current fuel load. I assumed they would direct another tanker to us like normal, even though nothing was said about refueling for the return trip during the briefing. It made sense, since the duration of the conflict was unknown, and a lot of aircraft were going to be in need of refueling. Instead they directed us to a captured airbase. It wasn't that far from the airbase the 1st Tank Battalion had just captured. In fact I think it only been captured a matter of hours before we arrived there. I have to hand it to the assault division for it up and operational so quickly.

Even though it wasn't home, landing hardly felt as relieving as that one did. It was a very small airfield, and it was packed with a lot debris and captured Yuke fighters. So they had us taxi to the only open hangar, which was obviously meant for large transport aircraft like C-130's. I was the last to pull in. They stopped us right in front of the hangar in a nice line. I popped open the canopy and shook hands with the crewman who pulled up on the latter.

"Welcome," he said. I sort of 'breathed' a thank you at him.

"God," I caught myself cursing, as I stood up and stared at the Sun. I hoped it might be cooler (little bit) than it was in the air. That wasn't the case at all. Sand Island was warm and humid, but the heat was nothing compared to that desert. I wondered how on Earth anyone could stand to be stationed out there.

"Yeah if only this desert was a beach. We'll get you guys rearmed and fueled in no time," one the ground crews said to me. I just nodded walked toward the shaded hangar.

There were some benches inside. Nagase and Chopper were already there. They both looked just as defeated as me.

"Welcome to the surface of the Sun kid," Chopper remarked as I arrived. He taken off a lot of his gear and was lying down on his back.

I noticed someone was missing. "Where's Grimm?"

"I think he went to get some water," Nagase answered. That been a problem if we were in an emergency situation, but I didn't think there was any chance we were going to be deployed in the next few minutes. So I just joined them on the bench.

"They just had to have their big battle here. Never mind all the cooler locations in this country," Chopper complained.

"This area has significant oil reserves," Nagase explained. "If we control it we starve the Yuktobanian of their ability to launch operations."

"Not to mention these bases," I added.

"Geeze, and I thought you guys were on my side," Chopper responded. "I get the strategy but why did it have to go this far? Why is everyone stupid about war?" he asked. "I actually want someone to answer that."

Nagase laughed lightly at the comment.

"You're asking the wrong people," I answered. "We're the Demons of Razgriz remember?" Maybe it was the heat exhaustion but we all shared a small laugh at that.

We stewed for a moment in the shade, when we heard Grimm stumbling up behind us. He wasn't alone either, there was a ground forces member helping carrying. I hardly cared about that though, because what they were carrying was an ice chest.

They dropped it just in front of the benches. It was enough to get chopper to sit up. "Where'd you find that?" Nagase asked.

Grimm was bent over with his hands on his knees, panting. "He gave it me!" He pointed to the ground forces member.

"We put this together when we heard that you guys were coming," he answered. It was only full of a boatload of water bottles, already cold too. "It's Yuktobanian, but water's water."

"Grimm, if I haven't told you that you're a beautiful man yet…you're a beautiful man!" Chopper said, opening one of the bottles and empting it over his head.

Nagase and I gave our thanks and followed Chopper's example.

After a chugging down one of the bottles I picked one up and tossed it to the ground forces member. "We owe you guys one."

"It's the other way around," he replied catching the bottle. "Besides, I'm really proud of this guy." He wrapped his arm around Grimm. It was true that the heat made my brain a little slower. But I was still sharp enough to catch the meaning of that.

"So you're the brother."

He nodded and reached out to shake my hand. "I couldn't believe he made it into the Sand Island Squadron. He's really something."

"You bet he is," Chopper agreed. "I taught him everything he knows."

"Well maybe half of everything," Grimm commented.

"Wait. So what about the other half? Hey!" There was general laughing.

"We're lucky have him. He's a real ace pilot," I added.

"Glad to hear it," Grimm's brother said. He turned around and looked at the ground crews servicing our planes. "Take care of yourself Hans." He didn't wait around for our reply, he ran back to the runway to complete his duties.

"So that's your brother," I said to Grimm.

He nodded, "I look up to him a lot. He was part of the reason why I chose this job."

"Maybe our luck isn't getting worse," Chopper commented. As he said that the crew came running up to use, telling us our planes were ready. "I take it back."

"Ha," I responded. "Let's get going."

While the tarmac was full of planes, there was no one on the runway at that point. It took less than a minute taxi and get us on the runway. Thunderhead contacted us before we launched. "Wardog, take off and proceed to vector 240. Enemy reinforcements have been spotted upstream of the river. There's a surface-to-surface missile platoon and…you've gotta be kidding me, they've got a battleship." That shocked me. "Wipe them all out and stop their fire to our ground forces."

"Boy, we're lucky, aren't we? Always running into monsters like this." Chopper lamented. "Hey Kid, you mind if I give up already?"

"How'd they get a battleship in the desert?" Nagase wondered.

"Does it really matter?" Grimm had a fair point.

"Grimm's right we don't have much choice." I stashed one of the water bottles under my leg. I had feeling we were going to be in the air a long time. "Wardog launching!"

A/N: Sorry for any typos.


	25. The Journey Home

I'll save you the excuses. But at long last I got this chapter done.

-Stonehenge.

Fire

It was September 2, 2007 when I arrived at Hierlark for the first time. To be honest my expectations were rather low. I saw the place as little more than a stepping stone, a layover to the place I was actually going. Though at the time I no clue where that was. To compound things getting to Hierlark proved to be much more of an adventure that I ever cared to have. I had been ordered to report there by that morning, and the military made travel arrangements for me to get there…on a plane. Like always I was more than broke at the time and couldn't afford to have someone bring my motorcycle all the way North, or have it shipped as freight. So stubbornly I decided to ride my bike all the way to base. Long story short, I should have just sold the thing.

I was sore and exhausted rolling into the base just before six, almost falling off my bike at the gate. On top of that, Hierlark was a place that was just perennially cold, the only difference between the seasons for the most part was snow or no snow. The only thing I could think of was when I would be allowed to retire to my quarters, and everything until then was just an obstacle, everything and everyone. And this was day I would first meet him.

The base was small, at least in terms of military bases. It didn't take long to find where I was supposed report. Not far from where I parked I found a bunch of people queued in front of some folding tables where a lot of stamping was taking place. I looked at the new cadets and recognized none of them. None except one, a woman who saw at the head of the line that I had meet only the previous month, Nagase. I watched her have as they ordered her papers, and before leaving she looked back and met my eyes.

Just like the rest, I grudgingly got in line and waited with a duffel bag in one hand and a worn briefcase in the other. I think it was about five minutes later that someone tapped me on the shoulder. And there he was, wearing a black flight jacket and aviator sunglasses even though the sun had barely risen. He had the most smug grin I've ever seen in my life, worse than Bartlett's. He had such an air of arrogance around him, and I was angry before a word came out of his mouth.

"Hey," that was all he said to me at first.

"Yeah?" I did my best not to glare. Even if I was though, I doubt Chopper would have cared.

"I've seen you somewhere before."

"Okay." I turned away, trying to send a signal of how disinterested I was in conversing at six in the morning.

But he of course persisted. "I'm serious. You really look familiar."

"Fine." I was suddenly hoping the line would move faster.

"No really. I think we've met."

I turned around and looked him in the sunglasses. "No I don't think we have." I was hoping that would end it.

"Oh I know," he said like he didn't hear me. "You're that guy."

"What guy?"

"That guy. Soltara, that one club with triple deck, you were playing guitar in that one Firebreaker's show about a year ago."

"Uh?" It took about then seconds for me to remember. That particular show was about a year ago. The band I had played with only formed to play that one show. It was one of about six I had done in that week. I barely remembered it all. "Yeah that was me."

"Yeah! You played the solo to 'Line in the Sand.'" I couldn't remember if that was one of the songs or not.

"Sure."

"You played it all wrong man."

"What?"

"You didn't play it with the right feel." It was too early in the morning I was too exhausted. Though looking back I never did take criticism that well. I was worse before I went to the academy, but I still wasn't that patient. I definitely was not in the mood to stand there in line and just take that criticism.

"Really?" I snapped back.

"Yeah."

"So how exactly would you play it?"

"Oh I don't play." I ended up dropping my bags and turning around to look him in the eye. He didn't react at all, just like he knew that I was going to react that way. "But if I did though I would definitely put a lot more soul into it."

I leaned in, almost ready to start something, which was not usual for me. "I'll keep that in mind."

He was still calm. "Don't get me wrong though. You're pretty good."

"Thanks," I hissed, right in his face.

After a moment a glaring I began to hear the other cadets complaining loudly. One particularly tall and built flight cadet pointed behind me to the tables. "Yo idiots. Move up in line!"

I didn't need or want a confrontation that early in the morning, so I decided to just drop it. Chopper though felt differently. "Hold your horses bambi. You're not going to get there any faster."

I rolled my eyes in frustration. Why he had to be a smart ass at every turn was a mystery to me for a long time. Maybe he thought it was funny even when it sometimes landed him in a lot of trouble, like that time. Chopper didn't move, but the other cadet did. "Just move up in line jackass."

"Well since you asked so nicely," Chopper replied, but instead of moving he dropped his bags on the ground and folded his arms. I didn't want to be a part of whatever was going on and picked up my bags. Before I could walk away though Chopper grabbed my shoulder. "C'mon man don't give in to this douche."

"This is your fight" More of the cadets were beginning to yell at us.

"Aw c'mon."

"No. Alright?"

"Fine. Whatever."

This is where things get a little subjective. As I remember it, Chopper (or someone) pulled on my shoulder from behind. Somehow while I ended up standing in front of his suitcase, so when this person pulled on my shoulder I fell backwards and one of my duffles went flying into the face of the cadet.

Chopper ended up catching me. "Nice move. Now go get him." And he tossed me back to my feet.

"What?" That was when the first punch came. And It was hard enough to knock me back down. Chopper caught me again and pushed me back to my feet. The second one I saw coming, and countered with a quick hit in nose. I could feel it squish as the cartilage cracked and my hopes of a quiet morning also cracked. I don't think I've ever seen an angrier face. He came at me, furiously trying to smash my face in. I stayed clear, my head still ringing from the first punch. Eventually I was able to get him into throw position toss him into a group of more cadets that were watching. Then things got nuts.

Someone jumped me from behind and before I knew it I was in the middle of massive mosh pit of junior flight cadets. Not a minute later whistles and all the guys on top of me were pulled away by base MP's. I found lying myself face down on the ground with my hands bound behind my back on my first day in Hierlark. And who do you guess was lying right next to me.

"Hey man. Nice moves!" He had the most conceited look on his face. A minute before if I had saw that face I'm quite sure I would have killed someone. But there, on my stomach, being arrested, I could only laugh. "My name's Alvin Davenport, but I rather you called me Chopper."

"Blaze."

"What do ya say Blaze, why don't we be friends?"

That was how I met Captain Alvin H. Davenport. That was how I met the ace pilot Chopper. That was how I met my friend.

The Osean Army's victory in the Jilachi desert was widely celebrated in the media. Howell made the rounds on all the Sunday talk shows, saying the same tired lines he had been pontificating since the beginning. The Vice-President went everywhere else, not saying the sames things. I thought maybe the victory might prompt some conciliation. With our army tearing through the countryside one would think the Yuke leadership would want extend an olive branch. But they didn't, and watching the Vice-President's condemnations, I'm not sure our side would have accepted.

As for the four of us, we were enjoying what would be our happiest times at Sand Island, in a relative sense at least. Even looking back, it feels weird, even a little wrong, to say that, but the Four Wings of Sand Island were at the peak of their popularity.

Operations Desert Arrow and Desert Blitz got a lot press soon after they had begun. High in skies fighting the Yuke fighters usually goes more or less unnoticed by war-time reporters. But flying low under radar, over a major river and firing several air-to-sea missiles into a massive Yuktobanian battleship is hard to miss. Someone got a video of Nagase's plane firing, and launched a bonanza of replays that will echo into the eternity of cyberspace. Even so though, the Air Force wouldn't comment on the incident, except to give general praise to "all the braze men and women protecting our soldiers. So the public and the press had no idea that it was us, except of course for one friend of ours.

"So how are all of you doing?" he asked us the four of us the next morning around 0950.

I found myself feeling a little critical of the question. "You've been here the whole time. What do you think?"

"I just want to get a sense of how you're all feeling. things seem to be going well for all you."

"Well despite just being sent into overwhelming odds, asked to complete missions that are more than above and beyond the call of duty, and not even getting a thank you from our superior officers...I'm feeling alright."

Genette just grinned. "Captain Nagase, we haven't really gotten a chance to talk since you were rescued. How have you been holding up?"

"I'm fine. Thank you."

Everyone turned to Grimm, who had suddenly given out a great yawn. "Hans are you alright?" Genette asked.

"Yeah. I'm just a little tired. I keep getting assigned extra duties."

Assigned was hardly the word. Perrault dumped a lot onto him, sometimes asking me to do it, or more often just going right around me. Pops was the real culprit though, somehow I think Grimm was more a less happy do it whatever it was.

"And do I need to ask you Blaze?" he asked me.

"What do you mean by that?"

"Well you're the squadron leader. Doesn't that make you the most responsible for this?"

I was going to respond with something a little qualitative, just to take some of spotlight off me. I didn't want to talk about myself, not on the record. Before I could say anything, Nagase said. "Yes." I turned to look at her, and she met my eyes for a moment before continuing. "Without Blaze in the lead, we would never have gotten this far."

I saw Genette write something down on his note pad, but I was too late again. "Absolutely," Grimm said. "He saved my life before I was even in the squadron and at least a dozen time since."

I had to stop the conversation before it gained too much momentum,, but that chance blew away when Chopper got the chance to speak. "Kid's the best pilot I've ever seen. He's probably gotten more kills than the three of us put together."

Genette looked at me then. "Is that true?" I didn't get the chance to answer.

"No matter what the Captain's always incredible. Every time we sortie I'm always afraid I'm going to fall behind him. He never seems to make a mistake," Grimm added.

Genette had almost five pages filled by then. I was getting a little overwhelmed. There was no way I was what they said. Even with the experience and skill I have now, I doubt I could live up to that expectation.

Chopper came next. "I'm serious Kid could single handedly win this war. It's almost scary. More than scary, it's terrifying."

"Am I going to get a word in?" I said, but Genette didn't have the ears to hear it.

"Nagase, you're his wing-man. How do you see the Captain's flying?"

Now that question got my heart pounding. Just imagine someone you trust most was just asked to honestly judge you. I was afraid of what she would say, not that it would be harsh, but I was afraid because I knew would surely fall short.

The room seemed to pause right before she began to speak. "It's hard to explain. Blaze has a way of reading the tide of battle to sets him apart. His flying is effortless and elegant, I don't believe we're flying the same plane sometimes. It's amazing. I don't think I'll ever be as good as he is." She looked at me once with a smile on here face. "I only hope to keep the enemy off his six'o'clock."

"Yeah," Chopper began. "Kid's the real Demon of Razgriz."

"Stop saying that."

"Why? You think there's some curse that goes along with it, Kid?" Chopper asked me.

"No, but I don't need you getting any more complacent than you already are."

There was some amusement around the table. "Ah after all the times he saved my ass, I thought it was because he liked me."

"Maybe it's because the Captain wants to shoot you down himself?" Grimm added.

"Grimm!" Chopper said wounded.

"Is he far off?" Nagase asked me.

"Well sometimes..." I was thinking more toward his antics with Command during missions, but he took it a whole other way.

"Are you still bitter?" he asked.

"A little bit," I replied.

"Did something happen between you two?" Genette asked.

"It's was no big deal," Chopper proclaimed throwing his hands in the air.

"Did he get you in trouble?" Nagase asked me.

"He got me arrested." Her hand went straight to her mouth.

"What happened?" Grimm asked. And all of their faces, Nagase, Grimm and Genette were focused as a laser on me.

Chopper started first, "Well Kid started the fight."

"What?"

"Yeah."

"Really?"

"Absolutely." It was always this way with him.

"You started the argument," I countered.

Chopper retorted, "Yeah but you clearly finished it."

"You see what I mean?" I said to Genette.

"Well, at the very least you last mission made quite a splash it looks like," Genette commented. "You're starting to get some attention from the top brass."

"And how would you know this? You're here with us?" I asked.

"Let's just say that I have more than a few friends in the Capital, journalists and otherwise."

"What if it's the same kind of attention we got last time?" Grimm asked. It was a fair point.

"No kidding, if we get another order to report to Oured, I might just go ahead and defect, since that's what they're expecting us to do anyway." All of us jumped on him at that comment.

"Careful," Nagase cautioned.

"What?"

"If the Base Commander heard you say that..." I began.

"You don't need to tell me Kid. C'mon I was joking," he defended himself. "Besides I would never say it in ear shot of..."

There was a knock on the door, and we all had a flash-thought to who it was. Hamilton opened the door and we all rose to our feet. "Sorry to interrupt the interview," he said to Genette.

"It's no problem. We can pick it up later," Genette hesitantly replied, still sitting by the way.

He looked at me then. "Captain, Colonel Perrault wants to see you."

"Yes sir." It was a rare summon. He never wanted to talk to me in person, not just me at least. Usually it would be the four of us, and usually it was more of a lecture than a conversation. It was always unpleasant actually in hindsight. My memory, and I would bet it's the same for Nagase and Grimm, is a little tainted by what would happen later. I always got the sense he was trying to claim something when he talked to us, claim some credit for our skill. That is not give everything to Bartlett. He wanted to talk to me alone, I couldn't exactly fathom what was going to happen.

So there I found myself, walking silently, a little behind Hamilton on our way to the Base Commander's office. Hamilton was the one I would usually deal with, almost exclusively. I haven't mentioned it, but we saw quite a bit of each other. There is some administrative work that come with being a squad commander, and the person I reported to was Captain Hamilton, usually several times a week. It was always business, always serious. There was only a few times were any other subject besides logistics came up. This was one of those times.

"So the SuperHornet definitely seems to suit the squad well," he said.

I looked at him. His eyes were still straight ahead, focused on were he was going. "Yes sir. It has far better maneuverability than the F-5's we were using initially."

"I'll bet. I actually got into an argument with Bartlett about what new planes should be requisitioned for the squadron. He wanted the SuperHornet. I wanted the F-15."

"That's an older aircraft, Captain."

"There's a newer model recently developed. Trust me, the F-15S/MTD is definitely the strongest fighter in production. I thought it would better choice."

That was the first time I had heard of the fighter. But I would certainly become familiar with it later.

Hamilton continued, "Bartlett wanted the squadron to have more versatility. Considering what the Yukes are putting in the skies these days, I thought it would hurt the squadron. I obviously was wrong though."

We arrived. He opened the door for me. I looked me in eye for the first time since the walk began. "Good luck, Captain." He walked away.

While it was always civil, there was also something that kept me from liking him. I would guess it was the same way for him. I couldn't tell you what it was even if you were there and had asked me. Not then.

I walked through the first door, and greeted his receptionist. Perrault yelled as soon as I knocked on the second door. "Colonel, you wanted to see me," I announce, opening the door slightly.

He was sitting at his desk, fretting over some documents in front of him. "Come in Captain. Don't bother sitting down this won't take that long."

I wouldn't have sat down even if hadn't sad anything. There was an edge of annoyance in his voice, which was usual for him, but it didn't seem like it was directed at me. He stood up, not looking at me, but turning his attention to outside the window.

"Quite the stunt you pulled out there the other day," he commented.

I waited for him to continue. I thought he would say something critical, but nothing came. "Yes sir."

"Was it Captain Nagase or you that's in the video?"

"Nagase sir."

"Hm. It's causing quite a circus. You guys are almost famous."

I had no idea what he was getting at. It seemed like he was trying to criticize me with praise. So I just went along with it. "Yes sir."

"You know everyone that joins the Air Force wants to be you Blaze."

I was completely lost at that question. "Sir?"

"You're a pilot. Everyone who joins the air force wants to fly. They want to be fighter pilots, heroes, aces. You know how many actually even get to fly?"

"No sir."

"Less than 20%. You know what makes the difference? You gotta have a lot of guts to make it. You gotta have patriotism, you gotta love you're country, more you even love your girlfriend, or yourself for that matter. Usually it comes from having a parent in the military, like mine. But even most fighter pilots don't become aces, even though they all want to. You've heard of Mobius One right?"

"Yes sir."

"Kinda makes you jealous doesn't it? But look at you. You're well on your way. More kills than 99% off all Osean pilots in history. And you've been an officer less than three years and you're already a Captain. All four of you." That was when I started to fidget a little as I stood. "So why did you join the military, I wonder?"

An easy question but it felt it was loaded somehow. "I guess I also just wanted to fly. Colonel."

"Just wanted to fly huh?" He turned around then looking me in the eye. "You work very hard. Your scores were pretty high at Hierlark, so were your grades at the academy. I thought there had to be reason. What did your father do Blaze?"

It was a question I definitely didn't want to answer. The condescension in the room was already high in the beginning, and it was becoming noxious. "I don't know sir."

"That's right, I forgot. You're an orphan. It must've been tough not knowing your parents. Makes it hard to appreciate the sacrifices men and women have made for this country. You're probably not even sure that you're a citizen are you?"

"I'm pretty sure, Colonel."

"Of course. Why would you be here otherwise?" He stepped up to his desk and pushed forward a letter, which from the letter heard came from a fairly high Air Force commander. "You performance during the last operation was phenomenal, according to a few other pilots there. High Command is no doubt pleased. There is even some talk of a medals of valor going around, for you in particular."

The Medal of Valor, was usually how one would talk about it. It definitely the highest honor you could receive as soldier of any kind. Like always it was reserved only for extraordinary feats. It wasn't usually given to pilots, since we aren't in the dirt and grime, and often the danger is much more remote than on the ground. Just the fact that was any talk at all meant something. I didn't even know how to think about it at the time.

Perrault continued, "Since I'm your commanding officer it comes down to me to make the recommendation. You've done good, no doubt. But I think you're rank is reward enough. Do you think you deserve a medal?"

I was digging my fingernails into the palm of my hand. How could I answer that question, and not screw myself either way? So I said, "I don't think it's something you deserve sir."

"My opinion too. Don't get me wrong though. The four of you have done much better than I expected. Especially you and Nagase, considering both your sort comings."

I was the edge of something, what exactly I wasn't sure. I never before felt like I was going to explode at anyone, except right then. I felt like I was looking at one of the old nuns when I was 14, always talking down to you from some high place, but never hearing you. A like then you just had to go along with it.

"Thank you sir."

"That's all I wanted to say to you Captain. We should talk more often though."

"I'll look forward to it Colonel."

He made the motion with his neck I was waiting for, the one telling me I could leave. And I did, quickly. But he stopped before I had closed the door.

"Oh, and Captain."

"Yes sir."

"Bartlett was a hell of a pain in the ass to work with. You've been better." I guess it was a compliment of sorts. I said thank you for the last and most agonizing time and flew away.

I walked, fast. Not really in any particular direction either. I just had to get away from that office. I brushed past some subordinates, not heeding any of their greetings. Burst through main door of the building and just kept on walking. I understood then why Bartlett looked the way he did when he briefed the squadron. It was unbelievable the conceit that was in the that room, and the complacency, and after all we had done.

I eventually found myself near the crew quarters, pacing around the hallway, trying my best not to punch a hole in the concrete. I wasn't going well.

Some of things he said were true, somewhat at least. There were records of my birth, none found anyway. So I don't know if I was born in Osea, or what the citizenship of my parents was. But I was an orphan, in an Osean orphanage. So under law I was citizen by that fact, the so-called 'Presumed Parentage Clause' of some fifty year old law. Did I feel a grand admiration for Military? Not particularly. But I did have loyalty to my home, at least the only place I could remotely call home. But none of that mattered. I did my job with integrity, and he no reason to doubt it.

"Hey," Nagase said, walking up behind me. I did my best to swallow my frustration, which wasn't good enough since she saw right through it. "What's the matter?"

"Nothing, just loads of bullshit."

"What?" she asked, almost laughing. "Did the meeting not go well?"

"That's understating it." I was trying not to vent everything out. Didn't want to bend her ear with something she already knew about our base commander.

"You want to get some coffee?" she asked me.

I shook my head, still too pissed off for civilized conversation. "That's alright."

She jabbed me in the arm. "C'mon. It'll calm you down." I doubted that, but I found myself unable to say no. Maybe it was because I'm too nice, or maybe it was because it was Kei that asked.

"I don't think a caffeine induced adrenaline spike calms people down," I said as we walked.

"It does if you're addicted to both. We're pilots after all," she replied.

That brought the Perrault's comment back to mind, and a soft swear under my breath. Soft, but she still picked it up. "Was it really that bad Blaze?"

"And then some. So I knew the man is kind of a SOB. But it's so much worse than that. I've never met anyone more sanctimonious, self-righteous, and egotistical...just a pompous jackass. He thinks he's not getting enough credit. I don't blame the Captain for always getting in his face." I was so engrossed in my mini-soliloquy, I didn't notice she was laughing. "What?" She waved her hand apologetically. She regained her composer but as soon as she looked me in the eye, she cracked again.

Seeing her in such a good mood did ease some of the anger though. "You're laughing. I'm not trying to be funny." She nodded, but still kept laughing. "What?"

"It's just...you're so stoic all the time. And here's the great Blaze, showing all this emotion," she explained, and kept laughing.

I guess it was funny. I was not, and even now am not, a beacon of personality. She was right, and I started to feel slightly embarrassed. I realize now how much pride I had back then, even though I didn't carry it around my shoulders.

"C'mon!" She hit me in the arm again, after I can been quiet for a moment. "What were you expecting? You thought he had a rough exterior but a heart of gold?"

"No. But just maybe that at his core he wasn't such a total fucking d..." I didn't get the last word out because Nagase clasped her hand over my mouth. A second later of group of junior officers walked around the corner. She didn't usually manhandle me that much.

"We should probably cool it," she suggested. "Nobody doubts you Blaze. We trust you."

"Yeah you guys keep telling me that. Just don't expect to perform miracles though." That was more or less what I had been trying to say earlier.

"There are no miracles Blaze. It's all you," she stated. It was perhaps one of the nicest things said about my flying. A statement of confidence void of distorting hyperbole. It left my buzzing for a moment. "Now," she began, "how did Chopper get you arrested?"

I should have known she was going to ask me about that. "It's not a very interesting story."

"Bullshit," she challenged.

"I'm serious."

"You got into a fight. And you got arrested," she pushed.

"Neither of which would have happened if Chopper didn't have such a smart mouth," I explained.

"So it was his fault!"

I was trying to steer the conversation to something else. Wasn't succeeding. "Yes."

"And?" I didn't respond, till she prodded me again with her elbow.

"And nothing."

"C'mon. You said he started the argument. What was it about?" she asked, leaning her head in.

"I don't remember," I lied, and she knew it.

"I'll find out eventually you know."

"Then you don't need me do you?" She hit me on the arm again.

"When did you get so stubborn?" she asked.

"Maybe you just don't know me as well as you think you do?" I suggested.

"I'll have to fix that then." The way she said it implied a lot more than I think she wanted to. Enough to stop us both in our tracks. For the first time I saw a flash of fear on her face. "I meant..."

"I know what you meant. Let's go get some coffee," I said. I took the lead, walking toward the lounge. She caught up a moment later.

The next two days saw little change in our status. The Osean Army was advancing rapidly in Yuktobania. And we were just sitting alert, waiting for orders for another deployment, as usual. I had felt pessimistic when the invasion began. I thought it could potentially be years of fighting before there would be any sign of the enemy surrendering. But I found myself feeling optimistic for once. Seeing how fast the army was moving, it was possible we could take the capital before the end of the year. Even if that end was an Osean occupation. And I was actually looking forward to that. For once I saw a future for myself outside of Sand Island. A future where I wasn't wandering the country alone.

Our next mission came on November 29th, in the late morning, and it wasn't what I was expecting. There was peace ceremony taking place the same evening in November City. None of us had heard of it, but it was a huge event. It was going to take place in November International Stadium which seats more than 70,000 people, and they were expecting a full house. The premier of the event was a speech by Vice President Applerouth. And we, had been ask to do a flyby as the part of the performance. It was flattering honesty, or as Perrault put it,

"Don't screw this up! You should consider this an honor, and do your part to boost citizen morale. This is the Vice President we're dealing with here, so consider this a guard detail as well, and be prepared for anything out there."

I guess it was an honor, at it least so it felt when we were taxiing on the runway. It did occur to me then, sitting in my plane, that the timing was pretty short for this sort of thing. Why were being told the day of? But that kind of short notice was par for the course for us. I wasn't bothered at all.

"Wardog, everything check green?" the tower called me over the speaker.

Nagase, Grimm and Chopper had signaled there were ready. "This is Blaze. Roger all check green. Wardog is ready for takeof," I replied.

"Copy. We still have a few transport aircraft inbound. Stand by five minutes," the chief ordered.

"Roger Control, standing by five minutes," I confirmed. It wasn't atypical for them to make even us wait, depending on runway traffic. So we had to wait for five minutes.

"So how should we do this?" Chopper asked.

"I know a sequence," Nagase said. "It's tight formation. A little tough."

"How tough?" I asked.

"Well it can't be as bad as trying to keep up with you Kid," Chopper commented.

"Still it's seventy thousand people and the Vice President. If we screw up..." Grimm worried.

"We won't. And if we did they wouldn't know," Chopper conjouled.

"I can lead the formation for the fly-by. If you don't mind Blaze?" Nagase asked me.

"I was about to suggest that. Everything else is the same. Then just a combat air patrol ending at 1730 hours."

"Easier than cake," Chopper added.

"It's 'easy as cake.'" Grimm said.

"You actually can have your cake and eat it too, Grimm," Chopper responded.

I'm still not sure where the joke was in that. "Shut up," I ordered. "We just been given launch clearance."

It was relatively short flight to November City. We arrived in the airspace just before sunset. It was a clear day and the whole horizon was light was bright orange glow. Good day as any to have a peace ceremony. It was exactly 1700 hours when we arrived at the position. Right on time. Nagase took the lead, right as the city came into sight.

I hailed the AWACS, "Wardog to Thunderhead. We're in position."

"This is AWACS Thunderhead. Roger that Wardog. You'll proceed with your ceremonial flight on my order. Stand by."

"I'm proud to be able to fly like this," Grimm commented.

"Hopefully it won't just be window dressing, and actually lead to something," I added. It was ironic to have a peace ceremony when Osea had invaded more than half of Yuktobania.

"This is a ceremonial flight. Watch your manners, Kid." Chopper got on my case.

"Everyone form up and don't stray apart from each other. Okay, Blaze?" Nagase asked.

"Roger. I'll go trail and follow," I answered.

"Great. Let's begin," Nagase stated.

I was a little nostalgic as I pulled into the rear position. I had to remind myself it wasn't that long ago when that was my usual spot, when Bartlett was in the lead.

Thunderhead radioed in a moment later. "It's time. Begin your ceremonial flight."

Ceremonial flying is more challenging than it looks. No one is shooting at you, but the formation is often so tight that slight mistakes could kill everyone in the squadron. It's why the pilots that fly air shows are so carefully selected. The flight lead has to one what he is doing. And Nagase did. We did two passes over the stadium, one on the side to show the squad emblem, and the second Chopper and Grimm did an "exchange"maneuver, at least that's I called it.

"We're flying beautifully!" Nagase exclaimed during the maneuver.

As soon as we cleared the stadiums airspace a second later.

"This marks the end of your ceremonial flight. Good work Wardog," Thunderhead radioed.

"Copy Thunderhead. Thanks," I acknowledged.

"You wouldn't expect anything less from this group. We were really smooth up there," Chopper commented.

For once I agreed with him. We certainly hadn't 'screwed up.' "Nice job everyone. Alright form up on me. We'll head to 2000 feet just outside of city airspace."

"Now we just have to wait around another twenty minutes till the speech is over?" Grimm reminded us.

"You say that like it's a problem Grimm," Chopper harassed.

"Wardog, cut the chatter," Thunderhead said.

"We can listen to speech if you push to 89.9 MHz," Nagase announced.

"You really that interested in what he has to say," Chopper asked her.

"Thanks Nagase," I said and tuned in.

It wasn't exactly riveting oration, not for me, but he was the Vice President, and I should listen just because of that fact. It went something like this,

"People of Osea, please, lend an ear to this broadcast. As your Vice President, I stand here on behalf of the President of Osea. Listen your fellow countrymen cheering before me. They are filled with anger against Yuktobania, and they swear that they will not drop their weapons until Yuktobania has surrendered. Now, I ask you to listen, listen to their cheers!"

"Aw great," Chopper moaned. "Here comes the thunderous applause."

We all were probably thinking something along those lines. What else would they do? We're at war. Yuktobania started it, inflicting massive causalties within a few days. They were the aggressors, so what else could the public want? Instead of the sound of clapping hands though, there was a short silence, short but heavy. And then a murmur of a song that I didn't recognize, not at first. And don't ask me to sing it. But the Vice President, and it was exactly the opposite message than what he wanted to convey.

"Wait, that song...Citizens, please, stop this..." It was such a terrible reaction, I almost turned off the radio just out of embarrassment for him.

Chopper was enjoying himself though, singing along, "'Thoughts endless in flight, day turns to night..." He should never sing.

"That's not exactly Rock'n'Roll you know," Grimm reminded him.

"Who cares?" Chopper responded. "Hey they wanna get along with the enemy too, right? Man, this song's got soul!"

I would have agreed with him, but I didn't get the chance. Right at the moment the IFF alerted enemy contact. Incoming bogeys, several, almost right behind us.

I had to blink for a moment. Again? Even after Apito, I still doubted what the radar was telling me. But I knew it was right.

"Blaze!" Nagase hailed me frantically.

"I know. Four bandits, vector 290."

"This is Thunderhead. Approaching enemy formation confirmed. Wardog engage them."

What else would he say?

"Tally ho. Enemy fighters," Grimm said. "This is why we're armed right?"

"Are we...the only allies here?" Nagase asked, and I could definitely hear some worry in her voice."

"McNealy Air Fore Base tried to scramble fighters, but the runway was blocked after someone crashed on takeoff. I'm calling for reinforcements now. It'll be six minutes before the nearest squadron arrives."

It might be only six minutes, but it's certainly sufficient time to cause major damage. It didn't seem to make any sense either. There was no obvious strategic advantage to attack the ceremony, even if they did manage to destroy it. I began to have a sinking feeling my gut.

"Roger that," Nagase acknowledged.

"So we're on own till then?" Grimm asked.

"It's no problem," I said, maybe a little halfheartedly, but what did it matter? We had to protect the city. "We'll be conservative, and engage the bandits as they enter this airspace."

"Copy that Captain," Grimm responded.

"We don't have time to twiddle our thumbs, Kid. Here they are," Chopper announced.

There were six in the first formation, more coming not far behind. SU-27's, which meant these guys weren't going to attack the stadium. Just us.

"Okay," I said, once I understood the situation. "Let's break their formation. Then break off and shoot them down."

"Roger that Captain," Grimm confirmed.

"Good enough for me," Chopper sounded. "We won't let them get near the stadium."

"Alright." It was a tactic that had become routine, ever since the incident with the cargo plane, and the important passenger inside. We flew head on right at their center, and they did likewise. I got a lock on one of the planes. They broke right before I fired, and passed bellow us. Exactly what I was hoping for. I saw a handful of them break toward the stadium. Chopper and Grimm broke off to follow. That left three for Nagase and I to deal with.

"3'o'clock low Blaze," Nagase reported the position.

"Roger, I'll take him." We banked right, pulling in behind the bandit. It was only a second until I was in missile range and fired. "Bandit down."

"Nice kill. Two more coming in on our six," she warned me.

"Alright Edge, I'll take left, you take right."

"Copy," Nagase acknowledged.

I banked left vectoring back toward the two bandits. I found one of them right in front of me, trying his best to get out of my sight and back behind me. He got way too close though, and scrapped his plane with gunfire as it passed in front of me. I pulled back around to confirm, and I could see the fuel leaking from his damaged wing. He wasn't going to be in the air much longer. "Bandit hit, and no factor." Then I tried to find Nagase.

"Edge?"

"Just a few more seconds," Nagase replied. I found her plane, following the Su-27 as it came out of a turn arc. "Locking on. Fox 1." The missile flew from her jet and hit the enemy just above the fuselage, turning it a flying fireball for a few seconds before it disintegrated.

"Nice kill Edge." Chopper and Grimm, had already shot down two of the three that had broken their way.

"There's additional aircraft incoming." That wasn't the reply I was expecting from her. But she was right. The IFF showed at least eight more bandits.

"Roger, I have them on radar. Thunderhead what's the ETA on the reinforcements?"

"Five minutes Wardog. You'll have to hold out till then." I swore under my breath. Why did time have to work against us at this moment, that's what I was thinking.

"...Hey, wait a minute." Chopper began. "Whoa, they're still singing. Why aren't they evacuating the stadium? Where's the air-raid siren?"

"Captain?" Grimm hailed me.

He was right. They weren't evacuating anyone. And I could here some radio that wasn't encourgaging. "Are you saying the enemy's invaded this far inland?" one said. "Are you sure those planes are headed for this stadium?"

They had to take care of themselves though. "Never mind that. We have fighters incoming. Thunderhead?"

"I've radioed the situation to City. They'll take care of the civilians," Thunderhead responded.

"Blaze, two fighters coming in at, ten'o'clock," Nagase said. I saw them, more Su-27 Flankers. So I wasn't going to get a chance to think?

"I got 'em just watch my six." She copied. We flew at them fast, but they broke as soon I was in range. "Damn!" I wasn't about to give up on them that easily. I pushed up the throttle and got a lock. The missile took nearly ten seconds to hit, but it did, and the plane went down. The other was running as fast as he could, and I wasn't going to bite. And it looked like Chopper and Grimm needed an assist.

"Chopper, what's your status?"

"Well I'm dancing around with this funny guy who's trying to plug a missile up my ass. But other than that I'm great!" I heard him yell under the strain of a turn.

"Roger we're on our way," I replied.

It was a few seconds before we got into visual range. Chopper was in hot pursuit of one while the other was dancing with Grimm. I saw the enemy fighter gain a little bit of distance on the turn and for a moment I was afraid Chopper was going to lose it, but then I saw the spoke trailing from the engine then the pilot bail out.

"Yeah! Bandit down kid!" Chopper yelled.

"Good work," I said. Grimm wasn't doing nearly as hot. "Grimm bank a hard right on my mark. We'll take him," I ordered.

"Roger Captain. I was starting to get pretty dizzy." At least he was discouraged.

"Edge?"

"Roger." She broke off gaining a little altitude to get a better firing position. When she was ready, she yelled, "Grimm!" He did as he was told and just as he was clear, Nagase fired, destroying the Flanker in a few seconds.

We may have shot those down, but there were still more out there, and the feeling in my gut was just getting worse. And the reinforcements were still three minutes away.

"This is nuts!" Chopper announced, after a few heavy breaths.

"You said it," Grimm agreed.

"They're focusing all their attacks on us," Nagase said. "You think there's another squadron inbound to attack the stadium?"

There was a definite fear in her voice. "Maybe," I answered. I bet Nagase was feeling the same thing I was. "But we don't have to..." Thunderhead cut me off before I could finish talking.

"Wardog, four more enemy bandits incoming, 12'a'clock."

"Roger that!" Only three minutes, I kept telling myself we just have to last another three minutes. Despite all the other missions, we never had the deck stacked that much against us as it was on that mission. I noticed how fast my heart was pumping at that moment, like I was in some sort of deadly race, rushing toward a finish I wasn't sure I wanted to go to. Not a pleasant feeling.

"Alright, everyone stay in formation." That always the best option from a tactical standpoint. It gives each pilot the best position to cover his wingman, and the option to concentrate firing power toward the front when attacking. The enemy's best option to shoot us down was to break our formation and engage us two or three on one. I wasn't going to give them that opportunity if I had the chance. But right as I was thinking that, my missile alarm went off, and it was coming right in front of me.

"Dammit! They have long range missiles," I swore over the radio. I broke left and low trying to get it pass over me, and it did, though it was much closer than I would have liked to be.

"Blaze?" Nagase was screaming at me.

"I'm alright. Let's close the distance on these guys," I ordered.

"Too late for that Kid," Chopper replied. "They're right on us."

And he wasn't lying. I pulled up to find myself probably only a few thousand feet, head-on with a Typhoon, firing at me with his guns. I passed bellow him, and tried to get on his tail. Nagase was already on him but she also had one of her own bearing down on her. Even in this situation we might've been okay. But more enemy fighters came in behind them, this time MiG-31's and in course of thirty-seconds, an engagement I thought I could keep control of, turned into the worst hairball we had ever seen.

"We can't make it," Grimm began saying, just as shook off a Typhoon. "There's too many of them!"

"Hang in there. Two minutes until allied reinforcements arrive," Thunderhead reassured us.

"Alright. I'll get ready to pass the baton.

I felt the same way as Grimm did though. We weren't in a good position, and we were slowly being pushed back. Everything I knew about tactics told me we should run. the only thing that kept me from doing so was the promise of help. Little did I know.

"Attention all units approaching November city," someone announced over radio. "I guess they had us going too..."

"What?" I mumbled to myself. I had no time to ponder who it was. I had one enemy in front of me trying to get on Nagase's six, and two more behind trying to get on mine.

Thunderhead was wondering the same thing. "What? Who is this?" he asked. No answer came though.

"That was a pretty good drill they got going. Anyway, drill is over. Return to base," the voice said again.

"Wait! What are you talking about?" Thunderhead tried to hail whoever it was, but suddenly the comm became overwhelmed by static. "ECCM! Restore communication link!

And there it was. Suddenly suddenly a dreaded thought that was clouded in my head became clear. It was a trap. They didn't come for the vice president. That was a fringe benefit, a covenient excuse to attack. It was a trap for us. They knew it would be us guarding the stadium. That's why they attacked.

As much of a shock as it was, it was overidden by the enemy that was about to get a missile lock on my wingman. Too bad I got a missile lock on him first, and fired. "Edge, you alright?"

"Yeah," she responded in a breath.

"The allied planes aren't coming! What's going on?!" Grimm exclaimed.

"Reinforcements are on the way! Just hang in there!" Thunderhead replied, though even he was stressing. "Dammit, none of the bases are responding to me! What don't you understand? There's an air battle above the stadium!"

"So they aren't coming?" Chopper began, "this figures given our luck."

"I feel like I'm being sent to die as some sacrifice!" Nagase exclaimed. No doubt she was seeing the same thing I was.

"No one's dying!" I interjected. "We're all getting through this!" I stated, and made it poingent by shooting down another Typhoon. I only had one missile left though. And there were still four enemy fighters gunning for us.

"Nice kill Kid and don't worry," Chopper replied. "They can't shoot me down that easily."

"Right!" Nagase replied, a little more calm. "I'm on your wing."

That gave me a burst of confidence. There were a few Typhoons left and maybe three or four MiG-31's in the airspace, there were more on their way though. We were low on ammo but we could definitely take them, even if reinforcements were going to be late.

"New enemy formation detected," Thunderhead reported. "It's a flight of enemy stealth fighters."

"Are they inbound to the stadium?" Grimm asked.

"They're dead set on crushing us, both physically and politically!" Chopper commented. There was no doubt about that.

"Enough of that Chopper!" I said. "You and Grimm go take care of them. Nagase and I will deal with these four."

"Roger that Captain. There's no way I'm letting them get anywhere near that stadium."

'Captain'. I think it was the first time he had every called me that. For brief moment I felt a glimmer of joy in the grim situation. Likewise Chopper, there is no way I was going to let them near you. If only that had been true. "Alright Edge, one -on-two. You ready?"

"Always" Nagase responded. And we flew into them.

The enemy wasn't pulling punches. One fired at Nagase as soon as we were in range. The shot was wild though, and she easily dodged it. She pulled off and engaged him, leaving me to deal with two MiG's. I was able to hit one with me guns in a pass. He was still flying though, and I found myself following him through every maneuver imaginable before I was in gun range again. I fired and took off his wing.

"Bandit down. Edge?"

"I almost have him!" She was still chasing that same Typhoon. Her tail was clear though, and I still had another MiG to deal with.

I pulled a hard left and got him to follow, and then inverted and did a split-s to lose him and then get right behind him, got a lock and fired my last missile. "Fox 2!" To his credit he might have evaded it, had he been in Typhoon, but his MiG was too bulky to get away. "Edge?"

"I got him the other is retreating," she said, and I confirmed it on radar.

"Great!" As soon as I said it though I heard a jumble of static over the radio.

"Damn!" It was Chopper and it didn't sound good.

"Are you alright? You've been hit," Grimm asked.

"Ah it's nothing big. I'm not wonder. I oughta be able to keep this plane in air a little longer Besides planes are expendable. Right Kid?"

I broke with the MiG I was following. "Right Chopper, but you aren't."

"I know, I know. I'm coming back. Don't worry so much. Anyway the stealth fighters are down. Told ya right?" Chopper bragged. He was right though. He didn't let them anywhere near the stadium.

"Confirmed." Thunderhead came over the radio. "All enemy stealth fighters destroyed."

"Chopper can you bail out?" Nagase asked him.

"Well that's kinda difficult right now," Chopper replied. He had a point, there were still enemy fighters in the airspace. "There's nothing but houses down bellow. I can't leave this plane yet." I could hear the warning alarms in background.

"Edge." I said to Nagase. She understood. We both headed straight for him, and found flying at a fairly low altitude above the city, his plane trailing smoke. I wasn't looking good either.

"Chopper can you maintain altitude?" I asked.

"I'm trying Kid. It's doesn't look like I got that long." He breathed heavily for a moment. "Kid, you see anyplace where I can drop this plane?"

There wasn't much. Every square inch of the city looked dark from the air. Except for one. "Yeah I think I do."

"Waydago Captain. So where?"

"The stadium," Nagase said. "Can you hear me? Drop it into the center of the stadium and bail out. Do you understand." He didn't have much time.

"Roger," Chopper acknowledged. "Good idea...gives me some hope that I might just make it. I'd better wait for the crowd to evacuate some more though."

He was being too altruistic for his own good. I could see how much fuel he was losing. There was no way he was going to last another ten minutes in the air. He needed to get out.

"This is Thunderhead, Captain Davenport are you alright?" Thunderhead asked.

"A little too late man. There goes the radar. My circuits are toast," Chopper responded.

"Look forget about it Chopper just bail out. Please bail out!" Nagase pleaded with, and I had half a mind to join her.

"Chopper!" I yelled.

"Okay," he began. "I guess now's the time. There's the stadium I'm dropping the plane over there."

For a moment I felt relaxed. He was there, right over the stadium. All he had to do was bail out.

"Roger," Nagase acknowledged. "Now get out." She said, and I waited. No shut appeared though. No flash of the ejection seat and the canopy breaking. I assumed for a moment that I just didn't see it. That was plausible, since I kept checking for enemy planes. But it still didn't come. And then...

"I can't. The electrical system's all messed up. The canopy won't blow. The ejection seat's probably not working either."

"Don't give up." I thought I was saying it, but it was Thunderhead. "Chopper. Keep trying Chopper!"

"Heh heh. I'm gonna miss that voice."

He broke off and flew his plane straight into the stadium floor. Straight into the Osean flag...

It's a moment of dichotomy, a schizophrenic splitting of reality. It's a moment where fact and mind bifurcate, a rush of input that crashes a data processor, a point at which one comes face to face with what one can accept and what one must accept. I saw it happen. I saw the undeniable flash and the smoke coming from the crash. I circled the stadium seeing all the detail that could be seen. I saw the result and knew outcome. But half the mind doesn't see it. Half the mind doesn't understand that existence can suddenly just be crushed into nothing. And you can't help but wish that you were wrong, that missed some crucial detail, that he wasn't gone. But it's only a moment, and then you know. You know.

Thunderhead radioed a second later. "Dammit. I hate to say this now. But there's a second enemy wave approaching. All units, engage."

Nagase and Grimm didn't acknowledge the order. They stayed on my wing, waiting. Thunderhead was right. There were ten more aircraft inbound, Typhoons , Flankers, all fighters it looked like. Nagase was right, they were coming for us, and they had gotten one. All Yuke fighters we had shot down, and all the pilots I knew didn't make it out. All the damage we had inflicted to army, and the rapid occupation of their homeland by ours. And then there was the Legend of the Razgriz mixed in with it. We were nearly out of ammo, severely outnumbered, and already one down. We must have been such an inviting target. And we could hear some of their radio chatter. "These are no demons. We can take them." So those pilots were going to do everything they could to kill the rest of us, to avenge their friends, to save their country, to make themselves into a legend. I had the same ideas in my head earlier in that war, but it was only then that I really understood what Nagase meant when she said how stupid that was. But fine. If that's how it had to be. If I had to keeping fighting even for stupid reasons. If I had to wantonly shoot them down to keep my friends alive. So be it.

"Roger. Wardog engaging." I broke off and turned into the enemy. With their superior numbers it was easy to know the kind of tactics they would employ, just overwhelm us, keeping firing until one eventually hit. We were practically out of missiles anyway, so we just flew at them at full speed. I first one didn't know what hit him, and the second was still too surprised to react. Nagase and Grimm broke off engaging on two others that broke from the enemy formation. They both shot them down. Another Typhoon spike me coming head on. He should have known though he was too close to get a good lock. The missile shot was trashed, then I was able to scrape his tail as he passed by.

The remaining enemy broke off the attack. It was probably because our reinforcements were on the way. Thunderhead confirmed that a moment later. "...Wardog. Thanks for holding out for us. The reinforcements are here. Enemy planes retreating." Fine. We took up position above the city heading west back towards Sand Island, into the dusk.

"We just got word from the ground," Thunderhead continued. "Except for a few injuries in the confusion following the evacuation. There were no civilian casualties in the stadium." At least that was true, but it was still a bitter consolation. "He...he was a model fighter pilot to the end. Join me in saluting Captain Davenport!"

* * *

There was no fanfare when we arrived back at base. Not this time. It was nearly 0300 and the entire base was asleep at that point except for the few that had the graveyard shift. Even the base commander wasn't awake. I remember how humid it was as I stepped out of the cockpit, humid and damp. It was definitely going to rain later. Not that rain meant anything on Sand Island. It always rained.

Everyone that was up there noticed immediately though what had happened. It was plain in the way they stared at us when we stepped off our planes. I tried my best avoid their eyes. I wonder if Bartlett had the same experience when he had to come back after that day when nearly the entire squadron had been shot down. I guess I shouldn't complain.

Hamilton met us before we reached the lockers. He didn't usually do that. He must have already heard.

"Welcome back. We'll debrief at 1100. Go get some rest." He turned around to leave but stopped. "I'm sorry." I nodded in acknowledgement, and he left.

We found ourselves standing there silence for a few seconds, feeling more exhausted than we ever had before. Grimm looked the worst. He was already nearly in tears just getting off the plane without him. Nagase was still held her composure, but she wouldn't keep for more than a moment. I didn't blame her.

"Okay," I began. "There's gonna be a few things that will have to be done. Since we knew him we'll have to make sure all his personal items are together, before they're sent back to his family." Grimm gave me a trembling yes sir. Nagase just nodded a few times. "There will be a service and each of us will be asked to say something. It's not required that you do though." Both of them seemed to want to talk about it. Neither did I. "We can work it out tomorrow. Let's just end this day."

I walked to the locker room, and found it more empty than usual. I threw down my helmet and tried to unlock mine. It had a recent habit of sticking, and Chopper kept telling me to buy some grease for it the other day. His locker looked like it always had, door slightly ajar, and a faded number. He never actually locked it. His point was that there was nothing in there worth stealing, and 'we live on an island.' I never had the impulse to look inside before. But then... The joints squeaked as I pulled the door open. Just like me, he didn't have much, a bunch of loose paper that looked way too old to be his, several empty packs of gum, a pasted picture of the four of us from Genette's article. The only other thing was his uniform, that hung on the side. It was fully decorated and pressed, the kind of uniform we would wear to formal ceremonies, with the captain's rank insignia. It looked like he had it ready for something when he got back. I wonder what it was.

I closed the locker, making sure the door would stay shut till the next morning, when I would have to clean it out.

My quarters were a lot darker than usual when I got there. One of my flourescent lamps had gone out again. It happened a lot, not just in my room. We lived in probably the oldest building on the base, which made the electrical system in the building the worst on the base. I didn't really mind that much. I wasn't that much of a reader. I didn't even read music that much anymore. I sat on my bed for moment, trying to think of what I should do. I should sleep for a few hours. Then get up and begin drafting a mission report. I found my mind wondering at that point though.

I remembered the last time Chopper and I were in my quarters. It was only maybe two weeks ago.

"Are you just gonna sit there the whole morning?" I had asked him. I was sitting at my desk working on a squadron assestment, and he was on my bed, lying on my bed reading a magazine that was too...explicit for him to have gotten on base.

"What Kid? It's not like we have anything really to do when we're not in the air. Besides you haven't answered my question."

"I did answer your question. So now you can go bother Grimm in his quarters," I replied, trying hard to focus on the report.

"No you didn't."

"Yes I did. I told you I wasn't going to answer," I replied, turning back to the computer.

"So you didn't answer," Chopper shot back.

"Not answering is an answer." I turned back to him. "And you know I would not appreciate it if you get caught reading that in my room."

"Oh come on, Kid! We're Captains. We don't have to worry about that kind of thing." That was really not true. "Now how are you gonna ask her?"

"Ask who, what?" I replied.

"Blaze!" He moaned.

"I really don't know what you're talking about."

"Who do you think I'm implying when I say that?" Chopper asked me. "Here's a hint you're writing about her right now in that report." I stopped typing at the moment and took a deep breath. So he was reading over my shoulder.

"You I have to write about you too. I could say really bad things," I warned him.

"Come on Kid. You don't have infinite time with this. As soon as this war dies. They'll probably give Kei her own squadron. If she even stays in the military."

"I don't see how that would be a bad thing."

"Geez you're stubborn. You told me before that you like her remember?"

"And I'll admit that was a mistake."

"Ha. Come on Kid. She so wants your cock," Chopper tried goad me, and it worked.

"Hey!" I turned around in my chair. "We're not in academy anymore."

"See?" he yelled pointing at me. It me a moment to realize what he meant.

I gave up on trying to continue and writing. "You know dating within the team is a more than a bad idea. Besides there are actual rules against this sort of thing."

"So? Let me tell ya Kid, very few people are actually that those regulations that seriously," Chopper countered. "Besides that only matters if you get caught."

I had to sigh at that line. "Did it ever occur to you that maybe she actually has a boyfriend outside of base?"

"She doesn't."

"How do you know?"

"I asked her yesterday."

I could have guessed. "You need to keep your nose out of things," I told him, and turned back to work on the report.

"I'll give you that. But seriously Blaze. If you do love the girl, then the damage is already done. Why shouldn't you both enjoy it then?" I couldn't come up with an answer to that question then, and to tell the truth if he asked me at that moment, I wouldn't have had the answer.

That was two weeks ago. Now he was gone, and no more would I have that voice. You were right Chopper...Alvin At least about this, you were always right.

I sat there feeling the weight of his death, and of what he had said. There was no question how important she was to me then. But the war was not over, and with him gone, I was less sure about the future of our squadron. I felt a big knot growing inside me. I couldn't remember the last time I had been this angry.

I knew then that there was little chance I was going to get any sleep that night, and got up headed for the door. Insomnia sucks because the next you feel robbed of energy, but honestly I always kind of liked wandering around late at night. The world was just different, more peaceful, more beautiful. I ended up heading to the fourth floor lounge. It was a little used room that was almost devoid of furniture, except for a small couch. It made a good place though to watch the ocean, or just to be alone. I couldn't think of a better place. I stood up and ended up knocking over desk lamp.

"Aren't you going to pick that up?! You just gonna stand there like a useless idiot?!" I thought to myself. I wasn't sure if I was just remembering something or talking to myself. I didn't care though. I left the lamp and walked out of the room.

I was at the lounge in about two minutes. When I opened the door though, I found I wasn't the first one there.

Nagase was standing by the window. At first she seemed to panic when I entered, but once she recognized me she relaxed. I looked outside. It had just started to rain.

"Hey." She said after a second. I didn't know what to say back. So I just looked her in the eye for a moment. "I was just..."

"Can I join you?" I blurted out. She nodded, and I closed the door behind me and walked to the window, standing right beside her.

For a few minutes we looked out the window, onto the rain shocked tarmac and beyond that the ocean, neither of us saying anything. It didn't seem like there was much to talk about, except one thing.

"It doesn't seem real." She said after a minute.

"Yeah," I agreed. "If there was anyone that I thought was invincible...heh...it was definitely him."

"Yeah," she responded. "He was a better pilot than me." I looked at her then. She seemed like she was staring off into the distance, watching the large ocean waves crash against the beach. "He was always the first to volunteer in flight training, for anything. I would never raise my hand because I was always afraid I would screw up." She laughed a little. "I didn't want to look like an idiot in front of everyone. He...he didn't care. He wasn't afraid of failing, even if he did look like a bafoon."

"He told me once, 'Success is not final, failure is not fatal. It's the courage to continue that counts.' I asked him then where it was from, and he told me 'a fortune cookie'." We both laughed for minute at that.

I could see the tears building up in her eyes then. "It didn't have to be this way," she said after a moment. I didn't need anyone to tell me what she meant.

"There wasn't anything we could have done," I tried to reassure her.

"Yeah," she replied. "I just mean...this war...it doesn't make any sense. It shouldn't have happened this way. I..." Her voice cracked. All the strength and composure she had shown earlier...I didn't know.

"Kei," I tried to console her. "We can't control everything that happens."

She nodded. She didn't need anyone to tell her that. But I didn't know what else to do. "I know. It's..." She froze for a moment trying to collect her thoughts. "I just I can't help but think that the next time we sortie it's going to be..." She stopped again. It was like she was trying to say something, something very delicate.

"What?" I asked.

She looked down for second, like she was gathering her strength and then looked me in the eye for the first time. "You weren't there. You weren't in the air when we got ambushed by the Yuktobanians. I had seen people die from the air before but...to see people you knew to see, their planes just blow up in front of you, and around you." Her breath became ragged then. She was losing it. Tears were beginning to well up in her eyes.

"Kei," I tried to put my arms around her but she pushed away.

"Then Bartlett gets shot down. Now Chopper. I just can't help thinking that the next one will be..." She was out of control. She looked about ready to collapse onto the floor. I caught her before that happened. She grabbed hold of my arm then, holding herself up. Outside the window the rain was becoming so think you could hardly see the air tower.

Wherever I was then, it was outside the area of squad captain. There was nothing I could do as her superior to help. Protocol, and duty, they seemed so important when I was talking to Chopper two weeks ago. But right then I really saw what he meant.

"I'm not going anywhere." I told her. "I don't care if there's a war or not, I'm not going anywhere."

I didn't know if she heard me. She seemed to get control of herself back after a few moments, and stood up on her own. She didn't say anything though. I thought I had gone too far for a moment. I thought maybe I had read too much into it. But before I could come with my next move, Nagase pushed my arm off her. Instead moving away though, she wrapped her arms around my neck and kissed me.

I didn't need Chopper to tell me. I knew how I felt about Nagase for a long time. There were times it was painful to not act, painful not to tell her. But I thought there was something greater in restraint, in putting my flying above my happiness. That's the way I always thought, and maybe that's sometimes true. But it wasn't true then. I knew what Chopper meant. I wasn't helping anyone by constantly torturing myself. I wasn't serving any higher purpose by suffering alone.

I'm not how long the kiss lasted, but it was Nagase who broke it, pushing me away. "I'm sorry. I..." I knew why. It was the same reason why I couldn't act. "I'm sorry." She backed away toward the door.

"Kei!" I screamed after her. But she was gone before I could say anything more.

The rain was getting heavy. I would never say that I was wise about anything, especially that sort of thing. But I was pretty sure that I wasn't supposed to just leave it there.

I found her outside, standing nearly twenty feet outside the door on the tarmac, just letting the rain soak her. "Nagase!" I yelled at her. She heard me, turning around to look me in the eye. Whether it be wise or foolish, on the backs of angels, or the wings of demons, I didn't know. But that didn't matter. I walked up to her and took her into arms and kissed her again. The rain continued to pour, well into the morning.


End file.
